Show me the headlines from your LOCAL news portal.
Translate them because local news are something people from outside don't hear about, plus they're often pretty fucking funny.
I'll start.
News 1: The reailway between Olsztyn(my city) and Toruń i being sorted out.
News 2: He stole a Opel from a neighbourhood. His friend burned it.
News 3: They're accepting applications for renovation of listed buildings.
News 4: The first cat cafe will open soon.
News 5: We have the money to rebuild Guerrilla street and Pieniężnego street.
News 6:He visited over 30 countries, he'll be talking about Asia(it's about some cunt who wrote a book).
News 7: Curier stole packs he was ment to deliver.
News 8: We'll have up to 8 tram lines? See how the new ones will look like.
This serial killer that killed over 40 people got captured.
>>68417810
Fuck.
Right off the bat with some heavy shit. Was he a local killer or a countrywide one?
>>68417605
>CP
>Pakis being Pakis
>Snow may interfere with the rush hour
"no sign of the boyfriend of a abducted and murdered woman"
Sport shit
I think TV show shit
"defeat of Niš in Finland" probably related to sport
"doctor from Niš accidental victim of shooting in Bečići"
""Manda fell in my hands I thought he was acting" young actor had a lot of big stuff happen In his carrier but also a tragedy he won't... " (some young actor died on stage while filming)
>>68417919
>GTA
>>68417942
>"doctor from Niš accidental victim of shooting in Bečići"
wat
I thought Serbia is safe.
>>68417975
Bečići is a place in montenegro, relevant only to my city because the victim is from my city. Nobody even knows why the shooting happened, two masked people drove by on a motorcycle and one fired on people with an AK, two died
>>68418069
Fuck. Montenegro seems to be dangerous.
We didn't have a shooting since like 10 years ago.
>>68418092
It's not dangerous. I've actually been to exactly that place for vacation once it's a small village. Rouge case related to the police and mafia probably
http://www.kaleva.fi/
>Neljä uhria vaatinut tulipalo aiheutti suurimmat vauriot saunassa
Fire which claimed four victims caused the most damage in the sauna
>Talon isäntä ja naapuri hinasivat palavan auton pois rakennuksen läheltä, esti palon leviämisen
Master of the house and neighbor towed burning car away from building, stop fire from spreading
>Medvedev saapuu tänään Ouluun – Pennanen ylpeä korkean tason vierailusta
Medvedev comes to Oulu today - Pennane proud of high-level visit
(The Russian prime minister Dmitri Medvedev is in Oulu today. The buses run differently, some streets are closed.)
>Posti myöhästellyt koko maassa, Oulussa viivästyksiä perustellaan sairaustapauksilla
Post late in the entire country. Delays in Oulu argued to be caused by illnesses.
(Postal service is going to shit, probably going to get privatized at some point)
>Yksi loukkaantui vakavasti henkilöauton ja kuorma-auton kolarissa Haukiputaalla
One injured severely in a crash between a passenger vehicle and a truck in Haukipudas
(Haukipudas is just north of Oulu)
>Suomalainen laivojen hätäkoodisto tekemässä läpimurtoa maailmalla
Finnish ship emergence code system making a breakthrough around the world
>>68418160
>Fire which claimed four victims caused the most damage in the sauna
Sounds scary.
>fire in sauna
>can't open the doors
Post.
This is a fine thread and we need to combat generals.
>>68418275
It's early in the morning, everyone's asleep or at work /class
>>68418288
I'm at work though.
http://kxan.com/category/news/local/austin/
>>68418275
http://www.hs.fi/
>Äiti ja kolme lasta kuolivat tulipalossa Vuosaaressa – ”Helsingin mittakaavassa todella vakava suuronnettomuus”
Mother and three chilldren die in a fire in Vuosaari - "Serious catastrophe in Helsinki scale"
(it's the same as in Kaleva)
>SAK: Näillä neljällä keinolla työttömyys voitaisiin selättää
Central Organisation of Finnish Trade Unions: These four ways unemployment could be beat
(lol)
>Venäjällä on nyt asiaa Suomelle – pääministeri Medvedev tuo tänään Ouluun kokonaisen ministerijoukkueen
Russia has something to say to Finland - prime minister Medveed to bring a whole team of ministers to Oulu today
So it's a bigger group.
From the article:
> kolme ministeriä, neljä varaministeriä ja Karjalan kuvernööri Aleksandr Hudilainen.
Three ministers (secretary of this or that to murricans), four deputy ministers and the governor of Karelia.
>>68417837
I have no idea. Country wide probably.
>>68417942
>"defeat of Niš in Finland" probably related to sport
Apparently the serbian team had travel trouble and came to Sastamala late, just 3 hours before the game was supposed to start. They postponed the game by 2.5 hours.
http://www.aamulehti.fi/urheilu/serbialaisvieraat-kaatuivat-helposti-valepa-ei-toista-vastustajansa-erikoista-toppaysta-24129992/
>There will be a pancake breakfast fundraiser at Elks Hall on the 11th.
I live in a small town. This is literally what we consider as noteworthy news
A radiator explosion killing two kids in the Bronx and some retard tried some stunts in the subway. Besides that it's all still Trump butthurt.
Fisherman finds kilo of cocaine off the coast
Heroine use has skyrocked this year, overdoses and hiv/aids rate rising according
Police raid local restaurant and find illegal drug, gambling, and prostitution ring
Guess what city
>>68418494
I wish this were my local news...
Consider yourself lucky.
1. CSKA trainer's daughter tragically died
2. Central bank closed 4 banks
3. 2 guys from anti corruption agency were arrested for corruption
>>68418650
>2 guys from anti corruption agency were arrested for corruption
lmao how russian
>>68418383
>Russia has something to say to Finland
>>68418494
It's still fun to read.
>A radiator explosion
How does that happen?
>>68418574
Miami.
>>68418650
>Central bank closed 4 banks
As in whole companies or just facilities?
>>68418691
>miami
correct.
>>68418752
Those 30-40 hours of CSI paid off, whew.
>>68418691
Whole companies
>>68418807
That's some bad news.
>>68418791
>Australia
>Yes
>>68418791
iktf bro
Spot the meme in Melbourne.
>>68418862
Why do they all look like hobos?
>>68417605
>We'll have up to 8 tram lines?
holy shit olsztyn stronk
>>68418883
Those are stronk independent sheilas who don't need no man Pyotr.
>>68419085
Our current president is a sly cunt, he's not very "clean"(as in his son wins some of the bids for irrelevant things) but he knows how to get monies.
>>68419144
How did they get that kid than?
>>68419189
eh like everywhere else in our region
and the kid's probably a syrian adoptee kek
>>68419189
Leb/Paki nu-male Melbournian.
>>68417919
>Toronto Sun
>News
>>68419237
that's some deep multi-kulti libtard shit
>>68419208
it's funny because they do it so openly, one of the bids won by his son company(for like 60k pln with a 30k annex) lasted 1 day for the offers to be placed, it'sa obvious scam.
>>68419244
>t. Paki who only takes his news through approved PC© SJW™ channels
Neck yourself Trudeau
>>68419284
that's how truskolaski gets re-elected, because people believe it's better for him to set up deals for his family and do some good to the city than to sell land to church like the previous pis prez did, kek
A female teenager arested after menacing her teacher
Flawless victory for the feminine basketball team
6 knife stabs, 5 years of jail
2 christmas concerts for a new organ
The hospital doesn't have any beds left
The terrain of an abandonned gas station will be sold
Shooting victim identified
man arrested after alleged threat to courthouse
Cafe Society: Take a taste on Christmas Tree Lane
One dead, one wounded in shooting
Pearl Harbor survivor: 'All hell broke loose'
man arrested on gun violations
Parents of missing girl held on contempt
man arrested after stolen gun, ammunition found
Blind man robbed of wheelchair gets new donation
Victim of attack with a hammer in coma; suspect arrested
Vehicle explosion in sends two to hospital
High School senior wins full ride scholarship to Princeton
Memorial for murder victim includes Christmas tree
>>68419391
just like in my american action movies
>>68419354
Very Polish news.
>>68417605
>Central Bank withdraws operating licences off 4 moscow banks
>Rumors that cellular transmitters in metro will be turned off are false states Rospotrebnadzor
>CSKA trainer's daughter tragically died
>Shooter was arrested in the city centre, no victims
>Cinty mayor summarized the restoration of Moscow's architectural monuments
>>68417605
This is a good thread. Since Stockholm is pretty big, I'll take my muncipalities news
>1
Is about some hug by an old lady that's been celebrated by two rivaling sportsteams
>2
Some hooligans from one of the former sportsteam are barred from entering a basketball-game where their rivals played
>3
A family was robbed in their homes
>4
the flu is here
>5
The medieval bar in the Old Town is doing pretty well
this is the second largest city in NZ.
As you can see, fuck all happens here.
>>68419555
>Comfy: The Country
http://www.animenewsnetwork.com/interest/2015-05-13/police-officer-lands-in-hot-water-after-sending-clannad-meme-image-with-racial-pejorative/.88140
Literally my city, I could probably invite this lad over to watch anime if I wanted.
>>68419490
>Shooter was arrested in the city centre, no victims
There was a terrorist attack?
>>68419536
>the flu is here
That's a news every local portal in Europe writes every year at least once, isn't it? I mean I saw it everywhere.
>>68419586
>2015
>trees stolen
>we don't know what snow is
>the road I said would collapse for the past decade finally collapsed
>>68419583
>NZ
>Comfy
Pick one
>>68419583
not really, most people live in really ugly cities like Auckland and Christchurch
>>68419593
It was rubber bullet pistol, kek. Maybe he was drunk or mad at someone.
>>68419628
>>68419634
>New Zealanders trying to trick me
I know your secret buds, you just say that to keep out foreigners.
>>68419702
Stupid cunt will probably get nearly the same sentence as for a normal gun.
>>68419705
I'm genuinely not kidding
If you want to live in some LOTR paradise you'd have to shell out a fortune to live in Wanaka or Queenstown. Most of us live in shitty weatherboard houses. They don't have proper insulation, which is fine for the North Island but in the South it's awful.
>>68419705
No we are not being ironic, NZ is a shit cunt and its so shit in some parts (especially in Maori majority and Rural areas) that they become 3rd world levels of shit, you are just denying this fact cuz of neo-liberal delusions and propaganda.
>>68417605
SPORTS
Generals prepare for home ice debut
SPORTS
Lacombe native secures Olympic trial berth
(Michael Burns/Curling Canada)
NEWS
Red Deer Creep Catcher caught
NEWS
Community Christmas dinner returns
Get ready to tuck a napkin in your shirt and loosen your belts Dec. 25 for the Lacombe Community Christmas Dinner.
NEWS
Big Brothers Big Sisters awards mentors
Big Brothers Big Sisters of Lacombe and District celebrated the lasting gift of making a difference in the lives of youth during their Great Big Christmas Dinner and Awards Night on Monday.
NEWS
Lacombe County adopts 2017 budget
Lacombe County Council adopted the 2017 interim operating and capital budgets on Dec. 2.
NEWS
Lecturer tackles topics of faith and sexuality
Burman University hosted Canadian psychologist Dr. Heather Looy Sunday in the second installment of the Herr Lecture series.
>>68419884
Red Deer Creep Catcher caught
I read this article and basically a guy lured another guy via facebook then began to record him with a cellphone
"Creep catchers" lures pedos and this one vigilante was arrested
>>68419779
Why can't Australia and New Zealand into insulation?
>>68419781
>(especially in Maori majority and Rural areas) that they become 3rd world levels of shit
Replace Maori with our natives and it's no different from Canada, petrol huffing and native gangs exist here too.
>cuz of neo-liberal delusions and propaganda.
?
>>68419884
>Red Deer Creep Catcher caught
>>68420001
kek
>>68420084
Yeah but Maori make up 15% of the population
1. Golden Swing (a club house by the golf course) won't get into debt restructuring
2. The university is leaving the Skinnarila estate, might be sold in the future
3. Royal House (estate investment group) bought some major buildings from the 19th century Hennala garrison
4. Mayor Lintunen: "The wrong info about the Imatra tragedy didn't spread too far"
5. Opinion post about freedom of press and politics in general
>>68417605
City championship winter swimming
Two people were killed in the road accident,
the woman was burned alive in her house,
the woman beaten with shovel his friend because of envy
the driver died behind the wheel of the bus, torpedo won the hockey with the score 2:1
And I haven't opened the criminal chronicle!
>>68420247
>Imatra tragedy
what is that?
>>68420579
>shovel
whew, why not beat the friend to death though
>>68420636
3 middle-aged women were shot in the middle of the street on sunday night, first mass shooting since 2012 when also 3 people were shot
Nothing but non-news crap.