/brit/

GAS
THE
TAIGS
lads

Why do you want to spit on Dana?

She dindu nuffin

GAS
THE
TAIGS
lads

>>68416191
ask her if it's gay to look at other men working out at the gym

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Here is a good comeback
"Did your parents eat grass, cause youre such a cow."

>>68416191
"alright haha xDD"

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>>68416250
>subtly hinting you work out

Nice

>>68416252
"How appropriate, you fight like a cow"

>>68416185
>>68416185

All yanks and yankettes (Canadians) are unfunny cretins worthy only of mass genocide or pestilence

>>68416275
I have taken your input into consideration Schmidt

Tell her "I beat to beat your ass out, but without the b"

>>68416300
I eat to eat your ass out?

>>68416276
>goes to vietnam and iraq because big strong america told australia to do so

We didn't bury any boys in the jungle or desert honey, you did

Yank

'I'll make you appreaciate the spit once I put my dick into your ass/cunt'

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Soon lads

>>68416341
I don't know Hans that's a bit much and we should move on from the spit

>>68416322
Bit of a stretch to revert to a irrelevant war I had no say in you pathetic spastic

Typically Canadian reply

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>>68416216
because its there and I like the desert

>>68416358
bitter and overly hostile, posting from a phone

typical Australian reply

>>68416358
You are part of a society that sucks American cock whilst I am part of a society that loathes yanks

Stupid yank

My mate actually had a habit of spitting girls during sex. Said it was funny.

>68416377
hmmm
Might be 'dora bait but then again I could see a laf being this deluded
Tough call

>>68416353
Maybe make her qualify herself to you:

'then better be a good girl are you a good girl?'
'then better be not to bratty, you are a good girl, aren't you?

>>68416377
>a society that loathes yanks

you're indistinguishable and have been for many decades

learning about black british slang

wagwan senpai dis ting hench

>>68416416
Don't know how brits can go on about blacks in yankland when their own speak like this
Even ebonics is easier to understand

>>68416374
>>68416377
could you all fuck off? no one wants you here

>>68416403
I like the idea

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Here we go lads

>>68416449
fucked it.

>>68416426
or 'will you behave'?

Ah yes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqPdSpezHhg

i fucking love this german lmao

>>68416453
People have been saying that since the first message mate, stop being a broken clock

>>68416423
it's a small section of british blacks concentrated in london

most black british lads speak normally.

as someone who has a pathetically lower class accent I don't think it's very nice to single people out for shit like that.

>>68416449
can't believe it, you were off to a good start

>>68416467
dont ever reply to me again, especially since you used one of MY ideas without paying me royalty's.

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>>68416449
it's dead jim

>>68416463
>53:14
Not a chance

Just filtered yanks. christ its much better here now

>>68416474
that wasnae your idea pal, that was MY idea.

>>68416488
nah mate

>>68416482
the battle of Britain itself was shorter than that


>>68416505
umm sweetie, I think you'll find it was my idea

>>68416468
mate abos are pretty much left to their own devices in the outback and even they speak better english than this

>wagwan senpai dis ting hench
bad

>ach och get tae fuck ya dirtae sassenach
good

anybody got and explanation for this shit?

>>68416449
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lbVdyPZiOLM

Mate: checked

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>>68416487

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hair is getting a tad thin

what's the pengest munch in nottingham

>>68416526

just a note, it's supposed to be f.am not senpai but I forgot about the filter when I wrote it

How do you guys usually get your haircut?

>>68416553
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-AF_kiAvkE

>>68416536
me in the back thinking about what i'll have for lunch

>>68416553
i have an embarrassingly bad haircut but im not sure what else to get

unironically have no (0) (zero) reason to live

>>68416479
>>68416470
>>68416530

>first message
>hurr you fucked it
>gets a reply

>second message
>hurr you fucked it
>gets a reply

>third message
>hurr you fucked it

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>>68416583

what about the white race laddie

>>68416553
I don't lol
I get it cut like twice a year maybe and otherwise let it grow long

when I do I get something lame and generic

>>68416590
got a reply to the third mate?

>>68416553

A bit longer on the top, short on the sides with undercuts then use some hair wax to comb them to the side.

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>>68416570

>a man hops into a taxi

>the taxi driver asks the man, "where would you like to go today?"

>the man replied, "yes."

>>68416590
let's try that logic:

>put a single bullet in revolver
>pull trigger once/twice/...
....

>>68416593
What do white people have to do with New Zealand?

>>68416627
By that logic every venture is destined to fail mate

>>68416423
You can only understand American blacks because of American culture domination desu

if you hear real ghetto niggas they are impossible to understand

>>68416639
>american "culture"

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>>68416635
dude ur just a meatbag
wormfood bru
everything fails so don't even bother loser
nihilism bra

>undercut with hair wax
imagine i attached an image of a man in a white dress shirt with a disgusted look on his face and hand gestures that suggest he's saying 'ew, no'

>>68416652
been had dubshoes nigga hahahaa

>>68416660

I'm not trying to fuck you or the guy you are imagining, so I don't care.

>>68416654
You can put quote marks around it but it doesn't change the fact they are cultrual centre of the western world

WAGWAN BOSSMAN YA RIGHT

Imagine being this aussie runt

Imagine all the people

>he has an undercut
jesus wept, does there exist a more bent hair style?

>>68416683
>they are "cultural centre of the western world"

>>68416702
so many people

>>68416684
>>68416686
>>68416702
SNAP

how did JUST become a thing

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I'm such an ugly, spastic cunt


Honestly don't know why I ever get optimistic, it doesn't get better

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NEED a short haired gf

>>68416713
le funny PoC twitter

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tallfags btfo

>>68416719
>I'm gay but I won't admit it just yet.

>>68416726
That's a small picture

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>>68416729
>being this insecure

>>68416729
Short hair goes better with big tits

i want to get the german talking to me through an earpiece while i try to hookup with girls

>>68416739
It's ok. I'm sure your two mommies are accepting.

this german isn't so bad, for a hun

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>>68416757
>mommies

foy

>>68416769
He's always looking for an argument desu, it's a bit pathetic

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0_1g5FVYAc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0_1g5FVYAc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0_1g5FVYAc

>>68416780
think this is a different lad than the dane, he spells mum with an o.

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High as fuck right now lads

gonna do a suicide

>>68416796
Why are you watching children's youtube channel?

>>68416815
don't

>>68416753
-alright at first you go, enter the store and get a tire pump
-copy that
-have you found it?
-yeah I walking to the cashier now, will I approach the target
-no, not yet, just pay up
-ok, roger
-I'm out of the store now, why do I need it?
-Oh, mine just broke and I got two flat ones on my mountainbike

>>68416827
>store
>tire
>cashier
>roger
>store

foy

contemplating whether or not i should go to work xmas party

>>68416827
German "banter", ladies and gentlemen

should i have a biccie lads

>>68416821

1. I'm trying to learn black british slang
2. I don't think he's a kid. at the end of the video he says he's on jobcentre

>In 1993, the twenty-fifth anniversary of Powell's "Rivers of Blood" speech, Powell wrote an article for The Times, in which he claimed the concentration of immigrant communities in inner cities would lead to "communalism", which would have grave effects on the electoral system: "communalism and democracy, as the experience of India demonstrates, are incompatible".

If only we had listened.

>>68416846
Better than your attempts mate, I like him

>>68416822
y tho

my entire mental picture of Vietnam is build upon movies, and metal albums
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-x59ON5Q88

>>68416853
Fucking hell he looks like he is 14

>>68416843
any chance of touching a boob?

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>my entire mental picture of Vietnam is build upon metal albums

https://youtu.be/vuG4G4BRUxQ

>>68416895
>shitting where you eat

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>>68416863

>tfw gf is obsessed with memes

not a fan

https://twitter.com/macaiylaa

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>>68416896
and moovies
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdSFC24KX2k

>>68416895
maybe i'll just head down for a feed anyway so i don't have to cook tonight

>>68416869
>just got home from illinois starts playing

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Make nurses CUTE again!

>>68416843
I'm not wasting a day off to see one of 7 bosses twerk like last year

https://youtu.be/gnTXLUvyToE

>>68416910
thought germans were into that?

>>68416914
whoa are you a professional therapist?

bit ironic that the creator of this video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbCQgXoC0pM

now has his video spammed on normies twitter

>>68416959
touché

https://youtu.be/n2ikC5uNkT4

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Check these exquisite repeating digits, you pakis

>>68416954
>>68417002
>youtu.be

what does this do?

having one of those late night feelings where i'm really motivated to improve my life...but i'll start tomorrow

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>>68416986
You bet your sweet bollocks I am mate

>>68417013
literal virus

i wish i could shop my body in rl hahaha

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>>68417011
>11

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>>68417011

trying my best

Just mowed the lawn lads

Shagged the missus of this runt while he was mowing the lawn

was pretending to be a lawn and some cunt mowed me. fuck that hurt

Poo

dressed up as a grass lawn and had some lad run over my bollocks

watched an aussie and yank next door get run over by some runt's lawn mower lads, howling at their screams

Advised a company to float on the stock market - but it's a bad time of the year of it. All over. Going to lose my job

Shedding a tear for her

>>68417170
don't see what this has to do with mowing

never seen this flag b4

>>68417165

Shopping for Vietnamese girls on Interpals
most are pretty qt which is a good sign

purveying a poo

Fucking hell

Just found out all National Parks have free entry this summer to celebrate Canadas 150th anniversary

was sucking my aussie bull off while he watched some lads get mowed over

made him cum so hard he was howling

>>68417192
kek, i was born there myself

>>68417223
tried doing a response but they all sounded sarcastic

>>68417192
i remember reading that it's expensive as fuck to visit because it's so remote

>>68416843
work "fun" is the cringiest thing in the world

>>68417250
my work had a ugly sweater bowling party
luckily it was my mummy's bday so i could reasonably skip

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england expects every man to do his duty 2bqh lads

HOWLING

>>68417223
Where is that even? Are you white?

HAO LING

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the waifu

postulating a wank

>>68417192
Kek I'd be surprised if you recognised a flag other than yours

>australians literally pronounce their countrys name as "asstralia"

SCREECHING

>>68417265
i went to one for a call center i worked at and no one drank anything. there was tons of free liqour and everyone stayed stone sober and just talked about how much they hate their job while the bosses wandered around in reindeer antlers and santa hats trying to get people to dance.

the worst was when my supervisor commented in front of everybody how proud she was i got out of the house to come in. bitch lived above me and knew i was a lonely autist.

He is looking at me

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@43.3454661,3.2136884,3a,77y,9.24h,122.7t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1srEyiKn-QwnaerKFOxptAGg!2e0!7i13312!8i6656

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Ayo teachin bitch, anon brought a gamejoy in his haversack

Does anyone have that gif of ewan mcgregor sitting at the table while breathing heavily from Trainspotting

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>>68417278
no, i'm not white. was there a few years ago as well

>>68417312
mad bantz

i always under estimate just how big australia is
always figured brisbane was like, 3-5 hours from sydney

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>>68417332
no but I have this .gif

>>68417316
we don't pronounce the l at all

>Canadians literally pronounce their countrys name as "他妈的叶"


SCREECHING

not feeling too well lads

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Me and the doggo

>>68417312
i googled you and i'm surprised you have internet. methinks i smell a proxy.

>>68417369
check for spider bites

>>68417244
>>So remote

More like because of airline monopoly. You can get cheap tickets if you book off-season.

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>>68417342
does this help

>>68417363
>not using HAO LING instead of SCREECHING

top yourself

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>>68417332
this?

>>68417397
don't like using canadian names

>message three girls on tinder
>Each one is an architect
>In each case I eventually ask "so are you residential or commercial?"
>None of the 3 sent a response

Is this like a massive turn off question what the fuck

Police will be carrying tasers now

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38252769

>>68417387
My folks are there right now thanks to Air Asia. Air Mauritius are a bunch of thieving fucks

>>68417401
Yeah thats the one
x

>>68417393
holy FUCK

>>68417411
its so autistic.

>>68417424
Better response is that Australia is the size of the US

>>68417415
literal police state. disgusting.

>>68417411
it probably is giving them the vibe that you're looking for more than a casual hookup

>new south wales

haha who came up with that one

>>68417438
i guess that's why its a continent lol

Woke up at 4 and havent been able to get to sleep again, no point in trying I guess haha

>>68417417
>>68417417
I agree. But air Mauritius offers student discounts for guys studying abroad, which is quite convenient for me. The service is the worst you can get.

goat film

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNVVoH9-QH0

>yanks get to include Alaska in their total size
bullshit desu
we should be able to include our antarctic claims then

>>68417446
Maybe I should just message more chicks saying hey let's fuck and put no effort into it. I would even be up for either in some cases if they gave a clue

The absolute state of women

>Brits pronounce their country's name as "متحدہ سلطنت یونائیٹڈ کنگڈم"

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I will NEVER (in no frame of time) have any form of romantic or sexual contact with a female

>>68417312
>a fucking box of crayon pencils

>>68417491
Me either mate.

>>68417491
Out there somewhere there's an equally autistic woman just for you anon

>>68417483
Its like counting Northern Ireland in the UK, unless you mean that its basically uninhabited, at which case you could claim the highlands are similar.

redpill me on Townsville

i have a random facebook friend from there an he seems pretty cool

>>68417491
>big tits
>blonde hair
>thicc
>braces
i can't. i thought not getting laid was the worst thing ever, now i've had sex and knowing i'll never get a woman like this makes me want to die.

>>68417462
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYQb3FtJfm0

>>68417498
>A low-budget US flag

>>68417505
Alaska is pretty populated though

>Friday Evening

Ah yes, shall be drinking and listening to Lou Reed, methinks

>>68417491
yeah same haha lol

>>68417522
Yeah, compared to Canada.

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>>68417503
and she could be posting in this thread at this very moment

>>68417533
Fuck I forgot to buy beer

>>68417520
>the flag of the greatest country to ever exist relegated to a corner

>>68417509
Tropical hellhole in the middle of a rainforest, mostly bogans and the like

The ADF have a major army base up there so there's a lot of soldiers as well

>>68417538
considering our northern territories barely have a few thousand people

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>>68417520
You mean Captain America?

Mummy brought the wooden spoon out to hit me but luckily granny was around lads

Eating tendies now. Very close call

Thoughts on eating out an escort?

>>68417613
They don't like it and you're wasting your time

>>68417613
for what purpose?

>>68417613
gross unless she has a really nice looking vag then i can understand not resisting

>>68417613
i've done it vietnam lol

>>68417613
Why would you do that

Why not her suck yer cack

>>68417613
um no thanks

>>68417613
>>68417629
>eating girls out
>wanting to eat girls out

that's something you do when you've been seeing her for a long time and don't even give a shit anymore and know she doesn't have any diseases.

>>68417613
delicious

>>68417613
Going to reply to this again

best site for escorts?

>>68417613
go for it

actually tried scheduling an escort tonight
super hot, very professional website, but only takes age 40+ men

Does anyone else enjoy getting cramps in your foot?

I lay in bed and just keep doing it

>>68417670
your mums facebook

im a virgin but a close friend of mine in high school thats a girl told me she had a sex dream with me and rubbed herself to it

told me this when we were drunk. I am just now realizing i should've made a move

>>68417705
good post

>>68417709
could understand being cautious if she just mentioned the dream, but saying she flicked her bean to it and you do nothing??

>>68417613
>>68417643
sorry for interrupting your fine thread, but I have a question related to the current discussion. How do I perform cunnilingus in a satisfactory way for my partner? My tongue usually gets heavy and tired too quickly, and I feel like I'm doing it wrong. Is any master of the art here able to offer me some advice?

>>68417632
What did it taste like then?

>>68417375
small dog, give it a 7/10

Alright lads I'm here now

>>68417733
Fingers

Watch lesbian porn

>>68417709
u gotta get more assertive my man

i mean like i get missing some sutble cues and then realising later but she meat dj'd herself to the thought of you fucking her

>>68417760
Didnt ask and don't care son

>>68417766
isn't that that american actress from the peep show

>>68417766
is this a town in wales

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gf just sent me this

our christmas party is going to be lit af

>>68417736
tasted like nandos

>>68417777
mirin them digits senpai

>>68417805
am ambivalent about this dog

never had a girl flirt with me

>>68417514
this hits too close to home

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hmmm

Tanty toody biddy bossy mate, a slip slap slop and chop to you this morning. Good day

>>68417820
>never had a girl flirt with me
I recommend becoming temporarily gay to get some experience

Helped with my anxiety around women a lot
just saying

>>68417845
Fuck off Russell Brand

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still struggling to figure out the different occasions for drinking coffee and tea in britain

>>68417709
Could have even said "wanna make dreams come true?"

Doing a beddy bye

Night lads

>i will never fly a spitfire in the battle of britain shooting down eternal huns and getting medals for it

reeeeeeeeeeee

doing a house sit plus dog sit for the next 9 days good to be out me 'rents gaff for a bit and will put a nice $250 in me pocket

doggo is an old lad so he's very low maintenance just gotta make sure he gets fed and gets outside for a bit each day

had some cheeky alprazolam earlier and watched the football game followed by heat which is one of my all time favourite films

now munching a durrie and listening to some smooth jazz on the veranda

cold out but feeling v comfy desu lads

>>68417872
What do you mean lad?

>>68417872
just say default tea and coffee when you really need it

>>68417841
how would you describe this nose type

>>68417845
slip slop slap 2bh

>>68417878
might pop off for a quick sleep too, m8.

>>68417893
if its cold why are you on the veranda?

>>68417895
when it's appropriate to drink coffee and when for tea
>>68417897
but i thought tea is caffeinated

>>68416191
WELL WHAT DID YOU SAY, WHAT DID SHE SAY?

SHOW US YOU FUCKING FAG I CANT WAIT ANY MORE

>yanks now have kevin rudd on TV to explain China-Trump relations
hmmmmmm

>>68417912
not gonna smoke in their house la

>>68417923
Yeah but not as much

>>68417949
Fair enough

>>68417923
I have a cup with my breakfast, a cup at noon, and a cup with my afternoon tea desu

>>68417933
he completely blew it
she was ready to fuck too

miss being in school and having the chance that you'd be assigned a seat next to a pretty girl that you would gradually become more comfortable with

>>68417971
Piping hot Lipton black tea I hope

>>68418025
>assigned a seat

What the fuck kind of school did you go to?

need some good background music

>>68418051
up until year 9 we were always put in seating plans
then after that it was only if the class was disruptive

still drinking my pumpkin flavored coffee I bought two pounds of a few weeks ago

Now THAT was a shitty decision

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>>68418025
>tfw went to all boys catholic school
choose to blame that at least partially for stunting my development in regards to women desu

>>68418029
Yorkshire but I appreciate this gimmick

>>68418051
CHING CHONG CHIIIING CHONG KOONNIIICCHIIIII

>>68418073
all my classes had assigned seating until college.

>>68418080
you bloody taigs

>>68418073
Was this a private school?

The only time I had any kind of seating plan was up until grade 6. And 7-12 we could sit anywhere unless we were being cunts. But that was mostly 7-9 since electives weren't as prominent.

>>68418085
Fuck off cunt, I'm here on holiday.

why is peep show so boring and repetitive after the first season?

>>68418107
AHHH HERRROOOOOOOO CHING CHONNNGIIIII KONNIIIIIICHIIII WAHHHHHHHHHH HEROOOOOOOO

>>68416740
I think it goes better with wider hips

>>68418107
>grade 6
alri yank, going to need you to fuck off

youtube poop got six views lads

>>68418115
not meant to be marathoned

>>68418115
it isn't

>>68418107
i went to a public school from years 1-6 and private from then on

>>68418118
agreed. why do mexicans have such god tier taste in women?

>>68418080
>all boys catholic school
bit gay

>>68418080
what year do you learn how to suck fathers cock?

>>68418154
bummed my best mate in year 10 2bh

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>>68418118
You aren't are mexican

Disappointing as that lad was beginning to grow on me

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taking my daily dose of Brain Force™ lads

feeling a bit RANDOM today lads

biggle buggle

>>68418164
good lad. whered you cum?

>>68418178
haha random humour is fucking top tier mate good stuf haha

>>68418119
The fuck are you talking about? Primary school is prep-6, HS is 7-12.

What's the matter here?

>>68418133
Ah, I see.

>>68418169
Good lad

Just took my Shroom Tech

>>68418187
they're years, not grades
foy

>>68418199
In Victoria, we called them grades in primary school.

Then in high school we called them year 7, year 8, etc.

>>68418218
>>68418218
>>68418218
>>68418218
>>68418218

i used them interchangeably 2bh

new
>>68418228

>>68418228

>>68418228

>>68418222
bruce you know better than this

Sitting on the bus, literally no one is talkong and everyone including myself is miserable

>>68418241
It's been a long day

>>68418231
shall be posting in this thread

>>68416583
iktf

>>68416624
haha