/brit/

have not read a single post in this thread

havent done a wank in a very long time

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Literally cannot fathom the rules surrounding texting and the like

Alri

>>68280336
>Trousers

Are they actually called trousers there? Do people use the word trousers in burgerland?

>>68280353
a girl getting a bf means nothing since it takes no effort on her part

>>68280345
>the year of our lord and saviour two thousand and sixteen
>not being a libdem supporting radical centrist

runt

me waving from my house on Skye

GAS
T
H
E

A
B
O
S
lads

>>68280391
>rules of texting
Wat?

>>68280336
levis fit is very inconsistent and they are also jew jeans so no ty but i get that youre a yank and theyre much cheaper there so i understand (they are like 70/80 quid here)

>>68280391
there are no rules

if you feel like talking, just talk haha

Above all, be yourself, do what feels natural

>>68280405
people should use the word trousers everywhere
'tis a fine word indeed

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Any lads on the sesh tonight?

>>68280385
If you go nofap there's a period where if you want it feels fucking amazing and you cum buckets. Although once I did it and the cum was so thick it fucking hurt.

After that it's shit though, it's like your bollocks think they'll never be used again so don't bother.

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DR OLIVER

I'M MICHELIN STAR

>>68280409
Clegg isn't leader of the LibDems you RUNT

It's are Farron now

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follow some terrific african humour pages on fb

>>68280415
Like who should text first?
Whether to double text?
What happens if you can't think of a reply?
Emojiis, do they really matter?
What's the longest you can go without texting before it is awkward to initiate again?
How do you ask a question without it sounding like you're blatantly trying to force a conversation?

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>>68280436
mad for it lad

tim farron is a leader for the 21st century

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>>68280405
It's this style buy Levi's

>>68280347
just bought a peugeot 206 lads

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>How can people go to uni and not make friends?

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>scodland?
I DNT LIEK SCODLAND!

>>68280436
Thats not tesco lager

>>68280459
I don't do nofap because im not a weirdo nonce
just didn't have a wank for no particular reason

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>>68280498
>25cl

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>>68280461

>>68280473
next thing you're gonna tell me tony abbot isn't prime minister of australia

haha, runt

>>68280495
Autism lad

Just fucking text her

I like england and scotland but im not a britboo

prove me wrong

>>68280499
The King Tommen of British politics

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who /radical centrist/ here?

>>68280559
seen his penis
its very nice

>>68280473
You're right, he's with the Tories now.

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>>68280556
Wales has the most beautiful women

>>68280436
man like deano

I consider myself an individual. A black sheep. A free thinker. An exception to the rule.

>>68280487
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFqYiKDwt0I

got an absolute CORKER of a new gimmick in the pipeline lads, just got it back from the boys at R&D

just got to send it off to the focus groups and then it will be ready to deploy

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>>68280561

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Look at these eyes

Theyre not ones of a future mechanic thats fer sure

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>>68280561
Me too lad

HIGH FIVE

>>68280347
This is fake, right?

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ah yes

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>>68280461
>Eating this food
>WITH NO LEFTOVERS

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is the world WAKING UP?

had a weird dream last night where I was shagging an old woman

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>>68280631
>lib dems and labour on immigration

5 days of voting starts now

http://www.strawpoll.me/11806214

http://www.strawpoll.me/11806214

http://www.strawpoll.me/11806214

genius redditor exposes corrupt government

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Maisie

>>68280605
Don't see why Australian posters are obsessed with that boy, the hair, the eyes, the tight boy pussy they subconsciously desire?

>>68280552
Yeah but then she either texts back immediately and I feel pressured to keep the conversation going even if there's nothing to say, or she doesn't reply and I feel like I've been blanked.

Absolute nightmare

Reckon 3rd eye will eventually win in a landslide

>>68280659
What ethnicity is she?

>>68280647
Ah yes all that anti-white racism like being given 6 figure salaries in Qatar and the UAE

>>68280663
Fucking hell this is actually hard

>>68280699
Hopefully I voted for that

>>68280605
How long have you been coming here mate?

top gear (clarkson, hammond, may era) > top gear (original era) > the grand tour > fifth gear > new new top gear (without evans) > new new top gear (with evans)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucRYxxXGF68

absolute banger found for friday night.

>>68280631
>>68280641
excellent posts

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>>68280672

>>68280659
for
>Should the government enact a stricter immigration policy?

i picked
>Yes, but make the process easier for skilled workers

dunno whats gone on there

>>68280731
>new new top gear (without evans)

wot?

>>68280647
kek this isn't true at all though. in the middle east they view you as fucking gods if you're white

when i was in iran with my blonde mate, every local called him "alexander" (after alexander the great) and they were insanely nice to him, they basically fucking worshiped him.

obviously smithster from the local east end council house won't have had that experience and think your pic is true

>>68280731
Never watched the original era

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Me second from the left

>>68280637
Nope, it's real
All churches were demolished under the freedom from religious oppression act 2009. Mosques are an exception because Islam is a religion of peace, not oppression.

I see 9 mosques on my commute to work, they're beautiful people and only most of them are host to peadophile rings.

>>68280637
yes its fake

the actual number is still grim though lad

>>68280761
He quit after the season ended/stopped filming

>>68280663
Who comes up with all these gimmicks?

>>68280761
the bits that chris evans wasn't in

>>68280637
yes

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Ah yes

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White pride!

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Unironically spent 1 hour trying to sync the audio on some great amatur porn I found.. Unsuccessful. Very annoying.

Even when I sync it to the arse slaps, it still ends up out of sync after a while. I have no idea what the fuck is going on.

tl;dr what am I doing with my life?

>>68280776
Bottom far right is a qt

>>68280776
So this is what it's like to have friends huh...

>>68280776
two on the right went to shit

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haha

>>68280776
suprised they're not fat desu

>>68280779
glad to see someone with their head screwed on straight here

>>68280776
Get the feeling these pictures are only like 3 years apart but the years weren't kind to the second from left.

Notice the girl on the left has become more comfortable with that lad though and it actually touching him in the new picture instead of recoiling her hand away like in the first one. Girl on the right isn't even doing the picture right fuck sake. Not facing camera. No bunny ears fingers gesture. Fucking skank.

Hatbait posters are the worst type of people in the world. They post hatbait which they know full well is cringe inducing, and derive pleasure from watching the hatposters(pathetic worms in their own right) acknowledge their existence. Just how lowly a specimen of human life do you have to be to sink this low? I will never comprehend it. They don't even aim so high as to receive (you)s, these are far too lofty a goal for the average hatbait poster. They merely seek the indirect acknowledgement of their existence from other, slightly less pathetic posters. Truly bizarre.

best crisps in the world coming through

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>>68280677
He personifies my carefree childhood, i wish everything was simple again, i live vicariously through nathan-posting

>>68280729
Ages, but i dont go into /brit/ much, its more like ill pop in, post some stuff then leave, i dont really engage much with other posters here everyone hates me so

>>68280779
REPORTED TO THE AUTHORITIES
gazing upon a mosque is illegal if you aren't a Muslim, infidel. Just will be swift, Allah wills it.

>>68280869
Not a word

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>>68280776
>you will never have long term friends

Ahaha

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>Hatbait posters are the worst type of people in the world. They post hatbait which they know full well is cringe inducing, and derive pleasure from watching the hatposters(pathetic worms in their own right) acknowledge their existence. Just how lowly a specimen of human life do you have to be to sink this low? I will never comprehend it. They don't even aim so high as to receive (you)s, these are far too lofty a goal for the average hatbait poster. They merely seek the indirect acknowledgement of their existence from other, slightly less pathetic posters. Truly bizarre.

on the kronenburg and diazepam

Theory: people like maisie because they relate more with her as an ugly person rather than actual good looking actors

just completed what the 'lads' are calling a 'wank'

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>Hatbait posters are the worst type of people in the world. They post hatbait which they know full well is cringe inducing, and derive pleasure from watching the hatposters(pathetic worms in their own right) acknowledge their existence. Just how lowly a specimen of human life do you have to be to sink this low? I will never comprehend it. They don't even aim so high as to receive (you)s, these are far too lofty a goal for the average hatbait poster. They merely seek the indirect acknowledgement of their existence from other, slightly less pathetic posters. Truly bizarre.

back on the nofap lads

lads wanna take me to maccies and that
cos there gf is a little rat

i have pancreatic cancer lads

>>68280906

That's given me an idea. Post your oldest friends you still hang out with more than once a month.

10 years, 8 years, and then a few 7 years.

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Practicing my gimmick for 2017

>>68280897
who is he

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Am I a rorke?

Not sure about the immigration thing, I said we needed more controls

doing a jerk off, dudes

*plays bill withers choons*

on the sterni and speed lads

>>68280945
she seems attainable and for all the memes she's got an alright body

>>68280906
I've had the same 3 mates for going on a decade now, but we never lived near each other so our interactions were basically limited to school and the occasional weekend. Definitely not the same as when I had friends in my neighbourhood.

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>walks

faggot numale lefty cunts

These Canadian lads on Uni Challenge are the most pathetic things I've ever seen.

>>68280975
my oldest friend is in his late 30's

>>68280975
haha here I go:

on the heroin and cocaine

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I'm a Democrat in the US...

>>68281023

Ayy lmao

>>68281023
so younger than you lol?

>>68280804
oh

He was fine when he was on clarkson gear

he tried way too hard

>>68280991
>didn't get higher than 60% on any party
Anarchists out

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>when you apply for a job you're underqualified for to fill in your Jobcentre worksheet but you get it by accident

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag1o3koTLWM

>>68281039
that's bad for you :/

>>68280975

the only person i regularly hang out with i have known for 13 years

occasionally meet up with people from school (17 years)

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>>68281048
stop

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>>68281057
if you go into a shop and they arent selling anything you want, you don't buy anything

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>>68280375

>>68281041
that's how left wing out so-called "Right" wing parties are

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>I'm a Democrat

>>68281041
brain in meltdown

>>68280975
28 years (sort of)

22 years (see them at least once a week)

when i was a kid i came up with a theory that the reason people die is because they figured out the meaning of life. once you realize what the universe is all about something instantly rips your soul from your body and the universe kills you

Fedora THIS you fucking losers

I'm only truly happy when i'm drunk, which is limited to the weekends because of work (which i hate).

So this is adulthood?
only 60 years left before I die. Maybe 50/40 years if i carry on smoking. Nice.

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>>68280975
2 years 5 months

JUST

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>tfw align with the Liberals on 85% of issues
>voted Labor
cunts shouldn't have taken away my chance at fibre internet

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best pepe

A total of 1,103 people have been verified as reaching 111.

Of those, just six reached the age of 117.

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>>68280975
>friends you still hang out with more than once a month

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How's /gf2017/ going for you lads

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>walks towards you

27 years old and I have never bothered voting in my life

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>Fedora THIS you fucking losers

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>>68281113
More like how right-wing our "Left" party is tbqh

>>68281115
>why yes, I am indeed a member of the Republican Party

>>68280975
around 8 years

Miss my dad lads

>>68280975
19
15
9
9
8
I'm 19

will /brit/ do an xmas card

(said xmas so I don't offend and pakis)

Remind me not to see this client again. It was non-stop pounding for almost 1 1/2 hours straight. He also thought it was my job to make me cum countless times. Never again. It was like he wanted to get every single minute of his money's worth.

Normally, my clients are not like this at all. I took a long hot bath last night, and I'm still completely swollen and raw today. It totally WAS NOT worth it.

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>>68281095
>not buying some gum so that the shopkeepers don't think you're a thief
NORMIES OUT

Just took a poo

Didnt even need to wipe

>youtuber you followed years ago who has been fairly inactive posts an anti-trump video

ah yes

>>68281174
i'm 27 too. first time i voted was in the 2009 european parliament elections. voted BNP and got a guy elected to the european parliament for my area lmao. remember distinctly gordon brown whining on TV about BNP members representing the UK in europe. was a great day tbqh

>>68281211
did he go out tonight? :c

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Never had a girl send me naked pictures of herself

How do you even ask someone for that kind of thing?

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Love, although resulting in altered body chemistry and is therefore real, is a hormonally induced delusional state. In addition it is humiliating, because it puts you at a disadvantage. it gives the love object too much power.

As for sex per se, it lacks both challenge and novelty and is on the whole a deeply imperfect solution to the problem of intergenerational genetic transfer.

what are you getting me for x-mas?

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>why yes, I am unable to fedorapost correctly

>>68281211
*walks through the front door*
haha sorry little tyke
*ruffles your hair*
that line at argos was huuuge haha

An hour of humiliating the sub about his tiny cock..And it is bloody tiny.
And then ball busting it for the session til he was red raw and eventually sick.
I made him eat It of course.
Been doing the exact same session with him for 4 years.
I see him every other week.

>friend is on a year long trip around the world


where did she get the money for this?

>>68281257
no he died

>>68281290
camshows

Neighbors dog is getting too loud

Thinking of kicking it

>>68281244
YouTuber I watched recently got out/is in the process of getting out of the Marines and literally all he ever talks about is the Marines

Drives me fucking crazy, hope it'll change when he's out completely

>>68281239
Wow 190kg fucked a prozzy

>>68281265
"send nudes"

>>68281239
Love reading these and imagining they're from the future when all the commieslags have realised how useless their degrees are and become whores

This sounds like Aisha tb h

>>68281290
Parents probably

>>68281297
oh

>>68281174

Voted Labour in 2005 and 2010, UKIP in 2015. Voted for Brexit. Voted for AV. Have voted Lib Dem and Green for a laugh in EU elections.

>>68281290
me

>>68281265
Looks like thom yorke in the thumb nail

>>68281253
>voting bnp

embarassing

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>>68280561
wahhheeeeeyyy

Just want to make a website that nets me £1500 a month in affiliate income. I'd be living the dream if i managed that.

I have lots of ideas, but zero drive. Even hating my job doesn't inspire me.

>>68281334
bet you feel like a cunt now

>>68281265
>Hey its humpday
>send me pics of your humps

>Hey its thong Thursday

>Hey it's frisky Friday

>>68281211
me too
he never gets in contact with me though
i don't contact him because i feel like he doesn't want to see me
quite the predicament, i'm sure i'll see him on Christmas though

>>68281290
just imagine how much dick she's getting right now, one of every colour

>>68281191
You have to go back Hernandez.

>>68281317

Bit baffling that they consider taking money from mentally ill men to be sex work, and thus identify with the discrimination faced by sex workers.

>>68281362
I was jiving from the start tbf

sorry about your daddo though ;/

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wew

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7N3xQI8Y3Bs

squealing

>>68281410
ta

>>68281413
who dat

>>68281413

What's 'huge sticky out cunt' actually called, because I think I like it.

>>68281349
what's wrong with the BNP? "dats racissss" won't wash anymore cuck

*Slams a drawer onto my bollocks*

>>68281453
a dick

>>68281305
interesting

>>68281400
She probably is with her backpacking friends

I would too tbf

New client, he was under 5ft tall but hadn't mentioned it when he booked, I don't know if he was a little person technically... anyway he was AMAZING at oral and made me gush so much I had to change the bedding. Hope he comes back! :D

there is no such thing as "degeneracy"

>Buy domain
>Get called by indian man asking me if I want a website made

He sounded so dejected when I said no. Felt bad.

>>68281458
Because they're fat embarrassing chavs

>>68281453
mons veneris or mons pubis

>>68281453
fat pussy

>>68281498
who let the rorkes out
woof woof woof woof woof

>>68281453
Feminine penis

>>68281498
In the eyes of the law, no.

>>68281453
Peanus Weenus

>>68281477
>I would too tbf
bender

>>68281413
MONS

PUBIS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtQ9l0oQmXE

you now remember 2004

>>68281421
howled as soon as he talked about the jews

>>68281562
Meanwhile the USD has stayed constant at 1 USD even with Trump.

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this is from the new alien film

business idea: ban everyone under the age of 21 from /brit/

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haha lads

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>>68281573
I mean the girl backpackers obviously
Not that any of them would touch me ha ha

>>68281585

Literally never heard this song before.

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>>68281623

Still not decided how to respond to my brothers wife trying to set me up with one of her mates. It just seems like trouble.

>>68281561
and laws are more important than morals
so its all good

>>68281682
Pic

>>68281606
underrated post

Wouldn't mind shaggin a dolphin desu

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>laws are more important than morals

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>>68281682
get out

go on

I've opened the door for ya

smashing off a packet of jammie dodgers right now

>>68281712

I don't know what she looks like.

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>>68281712

>>68281726
they are though
laws are the common grounds for a stable society
morals fluctuate through people

>>68281750
Ask for pics and post them for the lads

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myself on the right (pictured)

>>68281629
They might, you'd be an exotic lad and for some of them it might be their first opportunity to try and Irish cock.

Ramirez looking dangerous so far

>>68281784
He looks like a fucking gnome

>>68281623
good lad
lib dem surge

>>68281726
If they aren't, explain why are there entire DnD alignments based on it

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81726

>>68281794
I very much doubt that but thanks

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Would heem any sissy british boy

>>68281813
really quite rude

>>68281794
>try Irish cock for the first time
>it's 3" hard
>tell the girls about it
>they never try Irish cock

got negredo in my fantasy team lads

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>>68281784
>tfw he has probably put his willy in a girl

>>68281839
Sorry mate but it's true

>>68281845
haha
blacked

>>68281860
yeah well if you haven't got anything nice to say then don't say anything at all sweetie :) x

got a negrette as my fantasy gf

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>>68281845
Got Sanchez in there?

stomped her head in my prada creepers

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What does "b" mean if a girl calls you it?

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>300 attempts in his life by CIA
>die of natural causes

Fuck sake lads, pissed all over my legs and shorts again.

>>68281952
bigot

>>68281952
Bitchnigga

Out of curiosity, tell me what british people think of us finns. My aunt is married to a british guy and he seems okay and so does rest of his family, just tell me do you honestly like us meme free

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just made this comic lads x

like and subscribe

>>68281952
Bredjen

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>>68281984
benis in bagina :DDDDDDDDDDDD

>>68281946
yes lad

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howling

>>68281954
But why would they shoot a man before infecting him with HIV?

>>68281954
it was 600 "apparently"

>>68281985
Excellent post

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8GirDajf1o

>that's definitely running, two beeps

ah yes

>>68281984
nobody outside of /int/ has single opinions about countries . not even normie racists

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like milk lads, like fucking milk

>>68281954
Dr Pavel?

7" flaccid ngl

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>>68280426

>>68282028
certainly know how to sell yourself Mike

>>68282067
ah yes saxons

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feeling sad, lads
very very sad

>>68281848
He has a gf, apparently.

11 inches around flaccid ngl

Don't know if the bus is coming

>>68282116
pics

>>68282067
this body looks fucking disgusting but i find it kinda hot

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>>68282059
>Christmas Tim
nothing more comfy

I can actually hear the tune of what he's trying to play here, that's nice too

the golden snitch made the game of quidditch incredibly unbalanced

>>68282067
Rachel Riley?

>>68282116
>literally 2 inches flaccid
>5 semi
>6 hard

Is there any hope?

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>lads stop memeing, wales is white!

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>>68282156
if i see a snitch i get the 9 out

Stop killing the mandem

>>68280495
>who should text first?
Whoever has something to say.
>Whether to double text?
Never double text.
>What happens if you can't think of a reply?
Conversation ends.
>Emojies, do they really matter?
Girls like to see them from time to time because they literally cannot extrapolate emotion from words alone.
>What's the longest you can go without texting before it is awkward to initiate again?
It's texting. It doesn't have a timeframe.
>How do you ask a question without it sounding like you're blatantly trying to force a conversation?
You don't. Making it apparent that you want a conversation is important.

>>68282062
This tb h

Told girl to guess what country I was from, said it was former soviet, near the balkans and full of gypsies.

She had no idea what I was on about.

>>68282067
google jennifer ellison

*uses kage bunshin no jutsu*
*runs into the thread*
all me

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>>68282170
ru me

also 6 inches is fine lad dont worry

>>68280672
>doing a cheeky wee

>>68282170
that's normal

>>68282213
>You don't. Making it apparent that you want a conversation is important.

Got you on the other stuff, but how are you supposed to start a convo without asking a question?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Yredc3ayOE


jesus CHRIST

what is wrong with Yanks

Do brits play beer pong

>>68280672
Wanking

>>68282170
2 inch soft

4 1/2 hard not even joking

Honestly gave up trying years ago

>>68282237
Having a flaccid willy the size of your little finger ain't normal m8

>>68282170
me

Double, double toilet trouble; Anus burn, and pooey bubble.

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>>68282282
it is if you aren't a nigger

a large flaccid penis is impractical

>>68282102
Haha

London Riots make my blood fucking boil lads.

Don't think I could ever be Christian, 'love thy neighbour' is too fucking difficult.

>>68282279
i think that once you get with a girl (not some one night stand) it wont matter as much as you make it out to be

>>68282267
yeah

>>68282291
I don't want to know thanks

What is a 'transfer payment' lads??

*thrills the mandem*

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>tfw 7 inch flaccid 4 erect

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>tfw literally the majority of replies ITT were to me

Pawns

My flaccid state penis grows after I haven't wanked in a couple days

why dont you lift, /brit/?

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>>68282279
>Tiny Mick dick

>>68282315
ah yeah if a statue has a small willy that means its normal lads

roflolmao

Is it weird to go to the student union bar on your own

>>68282291
Haha

>>68282388
fuck off nigger

>>68282279
Don't believe all the lies on here desu, not everyone has a 8 inch dick. You are below average but probably not by as much as you think.

>>68282251
I didn't say you don't ask a question. I said you don't try to hide that the question is an attempt to start a conversation.

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>>68282368
I'm not even trying desu

>>68282381
I have a 9' willy.

>>68280356
>>68280356
>>68280356
old

>>68282381
well that's a reliable looking map

>>68281453
Roastie