/brit/

first for me

lib dem surge

hey i wanted to make the new thread

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>>68265521

i am here, dont worry

>>68265499
>button down collars

alri Gazza, how is managing the call centre going?

>>68265547
You need to be quicker. Need to stop these Aussie wankers tarnishing the /brit/ brand.

>2016
>still viewing TV
>no VR waifu

loser

this does not slip now

just realised from taking a walk and constantly peeping into people's houses I've become a voyeur recently
Wonder what the future holds for me haha

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thinking

Pungent smells
They consummate my home

>>68265590
seen anything good?

>>68265538
its not actually me :^)

>>68265625
i know its actually an unironic reddit as fuck canadian haha

Keep dreaming about the ex-gf who I haven't seen or talked to for 3 years lads. NOT a good state of affairs at all desu

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>>68265521
Having a real hard think

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Button-down collar is objectively the cleaner look.

>>68265617
Big Pyrenees dog that looked lonely
Gook girl sleeping with her gook toddler, think he looked right at me haha was the moment I knew

I doubt anyone here actually thinks, screeches or howls

I'm off to bed. Knackered.

>>68265676
quite a nice shirt. w2c?

>>68265665
Tell her that Southern Australia has one of the highest rates of death by hypothermia in the world

>>68265676
You look like a fucking spastic wearing those.

>>68265690
did chuckle

>>68265676
>objectively the cleaner look.
Objectively, it's fucking runtish and there's nothing "clean" about that at all

>>68265676
all you need is a mustache and some sweets in that top pocket

>>68265709
i look like a fucking spastic regardless of what im wearing

*thinks*
hmm
*screech*
oh my
*howls*

Going to rock down to Electric Avenue

>>68265676
Paki shirts

>>68265739
jamal

>>68265694
https://www.hollisterco.com/shop/uk/dudes-flannel-shirts/button-front-corduroy-shirt-8479621

>fucking paki. go back to india you fucking hindu camel riding motherfucker! white power!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UShrn519uoA

>>68265676
reddit shirts

how to be a good /brit/poster:
>pretend to be schizophrenic

Anything going on lads?

Even in /brit/
When I see a (you)
I long for /brit/

having a wank lads i'm doing a poo
i'm having a good hard think about you
when i'm finished pooing i'm going to be doing
another poo because i like to poo desu
wanking atm, while im doing a poo
having a think about you while im doing a poo
i want to do a poo
having a wank oh yes im having a wank
i'll have a wank while im doing a poo
i'll have a think about you while im wanking and pooing
i'm really going to enjoy this wank
pooing, doing a poo, having a big think
wanking, pooing, having a think about you
it's wank and it is poo

>>68265777
steroids

>it is my firm belief that this particular form of shirt is the classiest option for a gentleman like myself
>now, which classy boutique should I use to educate my fellow man of this objective fact?
>ah yes, Hollister

>>68265812
Useless without the vocaroo

>>68265777
Middle aged manlet driving an SUV with massive tires just to make sure everyone knows you've got a small cock as well
Ah yes, America

>>68265792
who you quoting, poof

>>68265547
better luck next time sweetie :)

>>68265792
We think that's a shit idea

>>68265817
t. mum buy's his gear from ASDA's George™ every 6 months

going to the outback and while im there I am going to kill a camel with a spear

might be anytime in the next 6 months but will post pics when I do

>>68265766
thanks

Can see my breath in my room lads

i like to think the australian that would always flirt with the californian girl entered a relationship with her only for her to cuck him with a big black man

>>68265827
no one you idiot. get the gimmick right twatface.

>>68265839
you are not real

hollister is great

button down collars are runty though

>>68265839
Confusing schizophrenia with pretty much fictional multiple personality disorder
>>68265840
Not him but Hollister's SuperDry tier

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>get a day off work
>no idea what to do
>invariably end up drinking, wanking and posting on /brit/
it really is no life is it

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>>68265825
>america

Um, fuck off??

>>68265846
10°c outside here lad, won't see my breath for weeks

Think I might die from the heat

ahh yes, this unnecessarily dark, beach-hut themed room, staffed entirely by 15 year old girls is most definitely the kind of establishment that would house only the dressiest shirts for a sir such as myself

Girl sat down next to me on the tube wearing a muslim headscarf so I got up and moved away from her, then got called racist (since when is a religion a race?) even though I didn't say a word

Disgusting

>>68265893
This didn't happen, but it was funny

>>68265874
>Hollister is SuperDry tier

I'll concede that their logo is a bit garish and certainly fucks up the colour profile of a lot of their stuff. However it's too harsh to call them SuperDry tier. That shit is unwearable and literally smells of virginity.

>>68265777
calling an indian a camel rider just makes you look retarded

>>68265856
if you do something stupid expect to be called out on it you penis imbibing cock sheriff

called a lad who quite obviously was avoiding a muslim girl a racist lads

I want to lick a british girl's feet.
how much will it cost.?

>>68265893
You're lucky you didn't get arrested for a hate crime bruh

>>68265893
that was very racist of you anon apologise to muslims!

>look at event guest list
>about 5 tinder matches
>girl that stood me up
>girl that I fucked it up badly with
ah yes, exactly who I wanted to see

want to do a tinder but I don't have any photos of myself

>>68265676
wearing shirts with t shirts under them is top tier runt

especially a cotton shirt when that ugly stitching like in that pic

>normie australian
ah yes, exactly who I wanted to see

>>68265892
>buying clothes in person in a shop
Alright grandad?

Excuse me while I try on my latest batch of gear delivered to my front door for no extra cost, complete with an easy-seal bag with pre-printed return address for free return if I don't like the items for any reason.

>>68265930
I'm a failed normie mate

doing a reciprication

>>68265929
>having to wash a shirt every time you wear it because it gets covered in your sweat and deo

Imagine being this dim. If you wear an undershirt you only need to wash the shirt after the collar starts to get grubby which takes 3 or 4 wears, easily.

>>68265905
Still don't understand how anyone over the age of 18 can wear something like Hollister, Abercrombie & Fitch, SuperDry or Jack wills 2bh

Ironically it's about as likely to be bought by someone's mum for them as Asda George

>>68265934
>asos
Hope you get something you actually like in your latest haul, Laura

inspired by this post >>68265934 I'm going to do some online clothes shopping
*surreptitiously loads up jacamo and sports direct*

>>68265954
a failed normie in australia is just a normie that can't surf very well haha nah never mind i will stop now

>caring about what other blokes wear

bent

When I used to live in Ottawa and took the bus (I live in an all white town now, thank Christ) I preferred sitting next to Arab Muslim looking people than Pakis. Arabs seem to douse themselves in perfume and cologne, but the Pakis always smelled awful.

>>68265963
>what are undershirts

striped t shirts don't belong under shirts like that pic

>>68265966
you'll have to wait until I upload the video x

>>68265975
>being able to tell the difference
'sheed

a really good new celebrity nsfw image/video really brightens my day

the maisie pictures from yesterday are a prime example of this

>>68265975
Aren't Pakis just Arabic Indians?

>>68265972
How are those new Asics tennis trainers your mum bought for you breaking in lad? They match OK with your flared blue denims?

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>it's unironically well into december
>there's 3 weeks of 2016 left
>christmas is in 19 days

>>68266005
They're Asians hun :)

>>68266010
christmas is haram!!
>>68265999
>LEECHEROUS british culture

>>68265999
post

>>68266005
muslim indian but yeah essentially

>>68265989
Pakis are dark brown and wear turbans and have long beards.

Arabs are light brown and wear scarves and the men generally have well kept hair.

>>68266005
Pakis, Indians, Sikhs, Hindus whatever. They're all the same to me.

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>>68266029
hope i dont get banned :x

>>68265934
>want a shirt
>go online
>buy one
>wait a three days
>it comes
>doesn't fit
>have to send it back
>send it back
>have to wait a few more days for the refund
>buy the correct size

>go into a shop
>look at shirts
>pick up multiple sizes
>go into the dressing room
>try them on and pick the one that fits best
>go home happy

Ah yes that brilliant online shopping

Have never had a female flirt with me AMA

>>68265851
that was me and that didn't happen, sorry to shatter your dreams

>>68266046
>those thick, manly arms

Gross

anyone got any gfs going spare

>>68266023
when are you going to take our islands off your money?

>>68266035
silkhs wear turbans and pretty much no pakis are sikh and only a small number of indians

>>68266046
3 2 1

>>68266049
This

Clothes shopping is pretty much the only thing that high street shopping's better for

>>68266070
PRECISELY because they are yours is that it is allright to have them
LONG LIVE T HEFT!!!

>>68266049
>forced to interact with the qt on the cash register
heh no, don't think I shall be doing that

>>68266061
sorry to shatter your wank fantasy* i meant to say

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>atheists shamelessly celebrate CHRISTmas, the birth of christ and fail to see their own hypocrisy

had a top lunch lads.

>>68266084
the falklands were never argentine

>>68266102
State gives us a day off work because of the Queen's imaginary friend. Why not enjoy it

>>68266102
Shut the fuck up

OK, that's it. SCRAM! The lotta ye!

>>68266101
why doesnt she ppst here n e more?

talk to me about tinder lads

I'm objectively a 710, will I get any so-called "matches"?

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which one are you lads?

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>>68266142
she got bored of toying with my feelings and moved on to the next sucker

typical woman

>>68266149
710/10

you will get all the matches, adonis

>>68266159
me in the middle

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/oxford-student-found-dead-after-first-night-of-university-ski-trip-in-french-alps-a3412111.html

went to school with this guy AMA

>>68266159
me in the top left

Celebratig Xmas even though I'm an atheist lads.

>>68266167
She was probably a munt if she was here 2bh

>>68266159
top right tbqh lad

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>>68266159
>being just one on all issues

>>68266177
He looks like a wanker. I'm glad he's dead.

>>68266177
how do planes work?

>>68266205
my mate unironically banged her during a night out in Bath haha

we chilled with a group of team GB athletes one night randomly, was pretty gud

>>68266159
nazism is left wing

true authoritarian right would be more like america before the 90s

are you a cao cao or a liu bei lads

im SUCH a cao cao x

>>68266272
pipe down, kuck

>>68265851
She said I was her official /brit/ crush at one point

>>68266261
>nazism is left wing
it really isn't

just because it's "socialism" doesn't mean it's left wing

>>68266289
what was your gimmick? being from northern ireland?

>>68266177
that varsity trip sounds like fun.

wish i was clever/driven/rich enough for oxbridge

>>68266272
More of a Pang Tong desu.

>>68266257
>living vicariously through your mates

Bet you just sat there and watched everyone else talk and have a good time you absolute cretin.

>>68266257
what a fun and sexy time for your mate

>>68266284
liu bei detected x

>>68266301
I was just being myself
t. Hunts

>>68266177
How's it feel knowing a person that's dead

>>68266177
I'm going there in a month, wish me luck.

vote lib dem

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Just goes to show you can go anywhere if you put your mind to it

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>>68266257
On one hand i'm jelly on the other hand i don't believe you

why is every single person on /brit/ a lib dem supporting radical centrist nowadays?

is this the new meme political stance?

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i've been to the gym and the shop

now my day is basically over

The government's defence against this legal case is pigging retarded

>>68266357
new

>>68266371
ive been in prison for a year

/brit/ used to be a UKIP stronghold

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i can't sleep so here i am doing a post

My anus is dripping

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPmZqsQNzGA

>>68266393
....elaborate

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>>68266393
>ive been in prison for a year

>>68266393
it's a /libdemgeneral/ now. get with the times gramps

>>68266393
>ive been in prison for a year

Sounds grim. What do people do all day?

just lost my virginity to a girl with one tit

>>68266480
gay sex with hats on

Kek

http://is-a-cunt.com/2016/10/gina-miller/

Enjoying a chilled glass of carbonated sugar-free Irn Bru.

>>68266500
DELETE THIS

>>68266438
>>68266459
stole £120k from my company working as an accountant

>>68266469
Not much really you just have to keep out the way most of the time unless you want to get stabbed

>>68266482
grats lad

68266482
You could replace the missing one

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incredibly lonely

>>68266272
don't play dynasty warriors desú

>makes joke about britain having a tv license
>part of our taxes literally goes to the ABC

nice one

>>68266520
Hope you buried all the money in the ground

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what's wrong with this train?

>click on a board
>see picture of myself used as an OP
hmm

>>68266520
Are you fucking serious or are you just memeing lad?

Why the fuck would you steal 120k? Is your life fucked? What do you do all day now?

>>68266577
that's what you get for going on /hm/

slept through another interview lads

what the fuck is wrong with me

>>68266572
no I had to give it all back and pay a 20k fine

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>not wanting waccy baccy to be legalised
Non lib dem supporters=no fun allowed cretins

>>68266603
shoulda just denied it

>>68266593
wont get hired as an accountant again

might get a job in tesco or something

>>68266574
you're not under it

>>68266569
and sbs

>>68266624
I left a tiny paper trail by mistake linking it to me

took them 6 months to figure it out

>an account who is shit at stealing money

lol

business idea: shove dog treats up my arse and bend over infront of the doggo

>>68266574
deletion of the P-arm on the 14th chromosome in-vitro

>>68266626
I don't think you're telling the truth, think you just want yous.

Always wondered what the fuck you'd do if you ended up in prison and come out though, the grim realisation that any meaningful employment is off limits to you etc.

>>68266645
fuck lad

what are your employment options now?

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>>68266626
>Won't get hired as an accountant again
No shit retard

>>68266673
i just said

tesco

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bet it won't be long now before they give christmas a less offensive name

>>68266658
wrong career path, that lad

>the mongs you see roaming the aisles at tesco could be failed fraudsters

>>68266687
are you going to kill yourself?

>>68266698

Festivus

>>68266687
hahaha maybe you can swipe a couple of extra fly buys or something you absolute weapon

>accountant
>thief

probably a paki

>>68266723
no

looking into moving to a south american country and changing my name

>>68266746
have you considered being a drug dealer you sound like you'd be good at it

>>68266746
ah yes, El Bandito Blanco

going to the local accountancy firm lads, anyone need anything?

>>68266761
police will be sniffing round me most of my life now all my shit is on record

need to get out

>>68266718
who are you quoting?

>>68266785
How many countries are realistically going to let you in though when they do a background check and find you're a criminal?

Not many, you'll literally never be able to visit the US etc

>>68266781
£120k please mate
just put my name as the reference, ta

>>68266787
haha epic picture danny can you bluetooth this to my w810i

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wishing I was handsome lads

>>68266803
panama

>>68266619
a medical marajoowana bill passed through parliament (Dail) unopposed here only last week

Why do China allow North Korea to exist?

>>68266871
to keep america distracted

>>68266804
yeah no worries, should get away with that easy

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watching an sfm porn video of link being turned into a girl and getting fucked bred by ganondorf

the fwb has started wearing tights a lot more

I hope she hasn't rumbled me

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the senpai

>when you spend 30 minutes trying to come without really enjoying yourself

Makes me think of my sex life t b h

>>68266049
>>wait a three days
>not getting it the same day
how's the 19th century helloooo

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Hmm

>>68267010
how do internet fwb's work?

Absolutely love it when yanks come into my pub desu. Had a bloke yesterday who bought a pint of ale for £2.20, paid with a fiver and said the change is for me. Nice!

>>68267042
no it's a real one, I couldn't imagine an internet one working at all

>>68267071
>pint of ale for £2.20
do you live in 2001 lad?

Just got away with using a fake fiver by pretending to be American hehe

is poleaboo still alive?

>>68267095
yeah it's called the north

>>68267072
ah, well tights isn't so bad

had my mild foot fetish rumbled once, wasn't comfy at all

>>68267099
in prison for fingering his cat

>>68267099
hope not

>>68267095
No, just not in London. Prices range from £1.99 to £3.65 for a pint where I work, pretty average desu, it's even cheaper in the north.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9e30vvREbs

the dream gf lads

>>68267099
yeah he's in the nick

craving the gyaldem

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Now that the dust has settled completely...

Are these the /Brits guys/?

business idea: import several million black qts and distribute them to the population as government-issued gfs in order to breed a new generation of mulatto qts

>>68267226
me holding the flag on the right

>>68267143
pretty sure you live somewhere pikey

/suddenlyded/
Mummy May kicking down some /brit/ posters doors I suspect

>>68267255
what if they produced males?

>>68267348
Hm?

>>68267257
I actually live in a cosy but boring town in the Midlands, known as a place for rich old people to retire to. Some of the surrounding towns about 45 minutes drive away are shitholes, but my town is undeniably the nicest in the region.

I'll give anyone an upvote if they can guess what town it is from that description.

>>68266520
Why did you do it? What were you going to spend the money on?

>>68267226
wonder what they think Hitler was right about

just got a small cramp in my calf
wasn't even moving ffs

>>68267379
Solihull or Lichfield

>>68267380
needed money to pay for my gf's specialist cancer treatment in germany, NHS wouldn't fund it

>>68267428
what happened to your gf in the end

>be dying
>bf says he has a cunning plan
>gets himself arrested
>die

>>68267379
Retford

>>68267404
Neither. Don't think anyone in the history of humanity has described Solihull as nice desu.

>>68267475
Nah.

>>68267475
more like Runtford

>>68267039
>we are not, in fact, living in a paradise utopia

bloody outrageous and unacceptable I say

>>68267449
she used the £120k to buy a flight to Nigeria, she sends me snapchats of her riding jamal occasionally

>>68267449
died while I was in prison

never got to say goodbye

>>68267039
>The racist criminal justice system

Maybe those other races just commit more crime for other reasons than whitey being out to get them...?

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man was not created to spend this much time in front of a computer

>>68267523
calling bullshit 2 posts ago

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>>68267497
>Don't think anyone in the history of humanity has described Solihull as nice desu.
officially the best place to live in England and formerly the whole UK

is it west or east midlands?

>>68267554
man wasn't created

Gf's got my willy down her throat as I type this ngl

>>68267584
>ngl
>l

>>68267523
yeah I didn't really believe you at first but now you're just trying to make this sound like a channel 4 drama

intimidated by mmy own bollocks lads

>>68267560
Simply don't believe it, think you created that table yourself desu. West.

>scratch head
>grey hair falls on keyboard
ah yes, kill me now

what's this death grips all about then

about to listen to them/him for the first time

death grips is my favourite singer

>>68267617
https://www.uswitch.com/place-to-live/

can you tell me the answer though I'm dieing to know

>>68267597
how can it be a channel 4 drama it doesn't even contain any trannies or blacks

>>68267637
alri gramps

>>68267649
meme music
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Oq5BS8E5D0

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>tfw the ex gf has started speaking to me more like she used to, having flirty conversations again, and wants to see me

hope i don't screw things up lads

NEED a brown gf

>>68267700
what does she smell like

>>68267700
there's a reason she's your ex

>>68267708
you disgust me

>>68267682
what is meme music exactly

>>68267700
you're being played like a fiddle

>>68267145

fucking grim, delete this

the slovakian ABU is posting in /epl/ again lads

>>68267668
Gonna have to guess lad. To give you another clue, it's famous for being an outstanding area of natural beauty, and it's popular with tourists (mostly UK, but some jf's) for its walking holidays. Gonna have a shower now, but expect you to have guessed when I return seeing as I've pretty much given it away now.

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the proto gf from 18 months ago is now engaged

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>thanks for coming shopping with me anon

got an exim tommorrow

>>68267763
was going to say Stratford upon Avon
if not then it's definitely cotswolds

>>68267758
>implying you aren't going to have a wank later
Haha alri mate
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFaSGoK7yKE

>>68267790
your giong do b fine x

>>68267780
>that sun damaged skin
ugh wish there was a way to convince young females to stop tanning

>>68267763

malvern or somewhere like clent/ lickey hills

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honestly dont even know how you get a gf, every girl I have an "encounter" with for the past bunch of years is a"modern woman" who's only into fucking and abhors the idea of being restricted to a relationship

think i'm too rougeish to attract the nice girls

pic related; its me

>>68267755
you know it when you see it but no one can describe it fully

heres an example : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0dxWGvMUpc

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Last Christmas, I

>>68267821
t. pasty nerd

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what should I get in greggs lads?

>>68267845
t. occupant of country with 66% melanoma incidence rate

>>68267880
called racist

look at the absolute state of the world right now, consider that you have at most 90 years on this planet, and then look me in the eyes and tell me, with a straight face, that nihilism isn't the only sensible doctrine to follow

>>68267892
t. dumb cunt with no understanding of just how insignificant it is in 99% of cases
can be cured with a little cut mate

>>68267836
whats ur dex bro

Where to cop decent hoodies? Like thick, heavy material, no wanky logos, no stupid patterns or gimmicks etc.

>>68267957
literally anywhere

what sort of fucking question is that

>>68267936
I'll cure you of your insolence with one little cut you pathetic swine.

*unsheathes my shikai*

the strokes 2bh
the rolling stones 2bh
the stone roses
the white stripes 2bh
pink floyd 2bh

Lads, where can I buy this "coke" drink I've been hearing about?

>>68267980
thanks for listing some overrated bands

>>68267980
plebbest post I've ever read in my fucking life

>>68267923
What's the point in being a nihilist if I'm going to be dead soon then

>>68267987
here x

*pisses in your gob*

>>68267980
I think this is a rather good post

ah yes another day where rachel riley isn't my gf

>>68267940
I know its hard to believe but its actually 9, almost 10

thats without item

every wanted to time travel to the 1970s?

just go to newcastle

>>68267998
>>68267992
t. sheeds/wiggers

>>68268056
t. dad rock enthusiast

>>68267957

reigning champ, just got one of there sweatshirts. Top tier fit, quality and comfiness tbf.

>>68268055
Or Norwich

>>68268081
tell me more about how you're going to pop a cap in my arse because I'm a motherfucker

>>68268055
>>68268055
actually want to heem any cunt who when presented with the imaginary opportunity of time travel says they would go to somewhere in the fucking 20th century

fuck off

yeahposting yeah?

>>68268110
Cringe post

craving the succ

>>68268135
fine, if you want it that bad...

*presents stiff willy*

>>68268106
those bands are shit 17 year olds listen to before they discover there is actually better music that isn't as popular

eating an apple lads

>>68268161
>inb4 EDM or any techno shite

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>those bands are shit 17 year olds listen to before they discover there is actually better music that isn't as popular

>>68268161
I don't give a toss about what's considered good taste lad. when you stop caring about what's popular or not and learn to enjoy music maybe I'll listen to a word you say.

it sounds good to me and that's enough

>self-med for 4+ months
>have psych appointment this week (not GIC, just a regular psych who might refer me to a GIC)
>get some laser but now I have problems with hyperpigmentation and it'll still be months before my face is cleared
>try growing my hair but I seem to have hit a wall, there's just a length that I can't grow past
>situation with my body hair is better but still terrible
>tried taking DNP to lose bellyfat (I'm 140lbs trying to get to 120lbs)
>balls are fucked so there's no turning back

>>68268181
do you really limit yourself to listening exclusively to one genre?

>inb4 EDM or any techno shite

new
>>68268224
>>68268224

finished my apple lads

>>68268216
you're missing the point

just because it's popular doesn't mean it's good

>>68268221
"yes"

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>>68265851
>>68266289
>>68266167
>having an internet gf...

Fucking Runts the lot of you
Absolute state of people today

paki cunt in the library keeps stalking poleaboo