Jokes

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
-
Snowballs.

>>67646634

How many krauts does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

>>67646928
1

>>67646991
lol

This one is kinda loses in translation, but I'll try anyway.
1942, Soviet squad battles Germans. After battle, squad commander gathers soldiers and scream:
-Who was that soldier at the top of hill?
One soldier answers
-Ja (me in russian).
Commander:
-Did you shoot that tank with RPG?
Soldier:
-Ja.
Commander:
-You idiot!!! That was a Soviet Tank!!!
Soldier:
-Ja, ja.

This one is good too.
A group of russians are passing through the forest, year 1942.
One of them hears cUckoo bird, approaches a tree and asks:
-Cuckoo bird, how much time I have left to live?
Suddenly a grenade falls down from a tree and a some voice from the top of tree says:
-Eins, zwei, drei...

i know one funny joke:
"hedgehog in a helmet"

>>67646634
It's not a meme. My parents told me first when i was a kid. It's real life

>>67647244

did your parents not like you or something

>>67646634
>Where does this meme of "Germans are inherently humorless" come from?

I don't know, but I've seen in it very early literature, like early 1800's books mocking Germans for their inability to understand humor and make jokes.

It's more than a meme, it's the truth.

>>67647266
In general old people hate Germans here.

File: 979862135.jpg (30KB, 480x490px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 480x490px

>>67646634
It's completely untrue, yeah. Germans got plenty humour, like that time a german comedian recited a funny poem about Turkey and Erdogan--

Oh, wait.

>>67647219
good one

>>67646634
Anyone have the cap of the German telling the joke of the driver and the police officer?

>>67646634
halo i am gehman coastgahd

Why did the shower heads in gas chambers had 11 holes?
Because Jews have only 10 fingers.

- what car is the fastest?
- obviously its a Trolleybus
- but why?
- because its very fast even when its tied to powerlines

>>67647955
*talking to a kraut*
-Why do germans love scat porn so much?
-What! How dare you!?
-Comee ooon buddy, chill out, everybody already knows that..
-Emp.. Eh..
*blushes and runs away at hihg speed*
*I start chasing him*
*hides under his bed*
-How do you find out my secret? Buaa Buaa, where's my mummy? Weeeh
*begins crying like a babie*
*I left his house lmaoing my ass off*

German "political prisoners" are being counted at a soviet train station to be sent off to gulag:
NKVD Officer:"Gerbert Maier"
"Hier"
"Geintz Scholtz"
"Hier"
and so on, until only Mr Hinüber is left.
"Kh- Kh- , Khinyuuber"
He doesn't move.
"Khinyuber!"
The Officer walks in front of Hinüber and asks
"Familiya?
Hinüber says:
"Frau und zwei Kinder"
The Officer writes something on his document, locks them i all into the train carriage and they move on.

Next stop, the Officer makes them line up and reads the names again.
Hinüber is the last guy.
"Frauundtzwaikinder" the Officer looks at the Hinüber, who doesn't say anything.
"Frauundtzwaikinder"
No response
"FAMILIYA!!!!?"
"Frau und zwei Kinder"
Officer beats the crap out of him.

That was not a joke, but really happened

File: Meanwhile in Germany.webm (3MB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 1280x720px

>>67648783
>*I start chasing him*
>*hides under his bed*
>-How do you find out my secret? Buaa Buaa, where's my mummy? Weeeh
>*begins crying like a babie*
>*I left his house lmaoing my ass off*
He probably planned a retaliatory strike against you while hiding under his bed. You are right. We have no humour. Life is serious and not a pony farm. Humour is not needed to survive. It makes no sense to waste my brain capacities with stupid jokes. So, you made fun of a German? Watch your back. His revenge will come.

>>67646634
Germans make the best jokes.
Like Kaiser Wilhelm.