/brit/

Scored a goal in football today lads

No girldem to see it tho

>>67574931
just finished my masters a few months ago, definitely worth it

>>67574883
me too, i remember being really exctied for normie shit as a 16-17 year old

now it seems like a very distant memory.
>>67574884
>tfw was friendless after the first year

mashed lads

>de gay

16th-18th house parties were the best but it's all about gaffs now

>Sitting down in an empty public bathroom stall taking a dump
>Some guy takes the stall next to me
>Feel awkward, so I try to break the ice and ask him if he likes football
>He doesn't respond
>Start getting nervous, repeat my question but this time louder
>He says "not really"
>Ask him if he rates Pogba
>He says "No"
>Feel kinda mad and hit the wall of the stall that he's on in a fit of rage
>Instantly regret it
>Say "Sorry"
>He doesn't respond
>Feel really bad
>Hold some money under the stall as a peace offering
>He doesn't take it
>Tell him to take it
>He says no
>Feel really freaked out so I wipe, get up and leave
>Wait outside the door of the toilet to apologise
>See him come out
>Say "I just want to apologise"
>He says "Fuck off"

Tell it to me straight, /brit/. Did I deserve that?

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willy is engorging

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I'm a total chad and go out all the time with my many chad mates and get drunk and have a great blast with my 8" cock. my mates totally talk to me all the time it's just I prefer to spend time here on /brit/ where people make fun of me for being a pathetic spastic even though I'm objectively an 11/10 with a 10" cock

could have fucked plenty of girls that all looked 10/10 but every time my 12" cock gets near the entrance of their fanny I realise they're only a 9.999/10 and my 14" cock goes soft immediately out of disgust that's why I'm still a 4chan virgin hahahahaha

pic related, me with one of the mentioned 9.999/10 girls

going out with the lads
they're going to fuck me so hard haha

>not going to >300 person uni house parties kitted out with ket, pill and balloon dealers

>>67574974
my dick is in orbit

/brit/ is a boring normie Facebook shithole nowadays

Won't be coming here anymore

Bored a hole in my drywall today lads

No girldem to see it tho

>>67575010
got my results in on monday
did very well. also got further in a few applications to high up places

hopefully this fucking shit of living at home will end soon

and i'll be back on the path of self improvement.

>tfw also have the job centre breathing down my neck making me come in everyday

wahey, he's got the ball
he's kicked the ball
he's only gone and put the ball in the back of the net
what a fucking legend
wooooo

football
it's dead exciting is football

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GOIN' DOWN TO MARGATE

If you're a student I shan't be reading your post

You're basically a child

>>67575067
But where else will you go lad?

Where else is there for you to go?

>>67574946
I'm staying home.

>>67575030
>obviously pre-typed, long post which has been held in reserve until the new thread

did not read a single atom of this post you obsequious little cretin

I am no subject of the so called "queen". I bow to no monarch.

>>67575067
/brit/ is a general for failed/semi normies who have deleted their facebook accounts

>>67575039
2,1

>>67575103
/britfeel/

Had an excellent dream lads

Me and the lads were supposed to throw a bbq/party

Turns out for some reason we have kids and old people that have to come

So we think we cant have the rager we wanted

I say we can, we just need to have a bbq for the old and kids first then get our party started

Then i was grilling burgers and having a great time

Lads is this true >>67571918

Can you lie about Irish ancestry to get a passport

>>67575100
based jjb manager

blasting techno again lads

>>67575100
>mfw I know people who are still students at the age of 25

Pretty sad desu.

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kay-on

>>67575125
too slow

>>67575100
>You're basically a child

Except you have Student loan money to spend on booze and there are lots of girls to have sex with.

It's literally fantastic. You should go. Just do a meme degree or whatever, worth it

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It's time
Katie > Alex > new scouse bird > blonde Leeds lass > Scarlett

>>67575030
Can't believe I read that

>>67575030

>>67575130
didn't read a word. you were close though

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3950234/Britain-s-headteacher-change-sex-post-Principal-returns-school-Claire-having-left-six-months-ago-Michael.html

Ah yes

>>67575125
stay there you won't be missed

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>>67575149
for you

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puu
wonk

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look at those legs though

>>67575134
no you have to have proof, especially now since the number of applications went through the roof after the brexit vote

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>>67575030

Am i the only one who heats beer before drinking it?


Just got 3 cans of Stella out the 'wave.

>>67575110
I read it

I regret the entire last minute of my life

>>67575180
going to stay here now just to spite you

how do you like dem apples

>>67575134
Why not check if you actually do have irish ancestry?

Which K-ON would you date lads? I'd pick Mio or Sawako.

>>67575210
(You)

>>67575194
can't believe he got to shag claire abbott

>>67575039
girl on the right has a very white face around the cheeks/eyes, noticed this with a lot of girls on tinder as well

are they just shit at makeup?

>>67575194

Dan Blizerian is 5'5" lmao

>>67575177
wow she looks stunning!
gorgeous girly xxx
amazing!
incredible!!!
beautiful girl!!

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>You will never go to a /brit/ pre-drinks
>You will never roll up smashed to the clubs and bars in a dozen taxis
>You will never stagger about and hit on girls with the lads you shitpost with every day

>>67575223
Mio would be a pain in the arse you'd have to initiate everything.

*walks into the thread*
*poops on the floor*

another friday night of shit tv, whiskey, /brit/ and sleeping pills. my life definitely did not turn out how i hoped it would aha

>>67575218
haha I was just falseflagging because I wanted you to stay :3

some prime feet on show

who /gogg/ here

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Watching comfy old films lads

suffering from stress incontinence

>>67575317
Yeah
Based Ed

>>67575267
yeah what a loser that guy is lmfao

>>67575231
fuck he's cute, I wouldn't trust myself around him

What even is gogglebox?

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>>67575277
Honestly would

You guys are the only people in the world who could possibly understand me.

>>67575293
really makes me think

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>>67575293
v good post

Alri lads

The British exchange student is asking if he can borrow one of my pint glasses for the house party tonight

Can I trust him? This is the same guy that nicks pints from the bar everytime we're down there

>>67575315
very cute lid ( '^')

>>67575302
I understand how you feel.

i'm spraying shite out of my arse. i've been sat here the past 30 minutes

gonna be knocked out by 11 at this rate lads

>>67575398
8

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Milton Keynes meetup when

>>67575404
pics of spray pls lad

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https://www.reddit.com/r/transpassing/

ballbusting is the most dumbfounding fetish to me. how can one be turned on by such excruciating pain?

>there are normie cunts posting in /brit/ RIGHT NOW

>>67575277
I wonder what the true demographic of /brit/ is

half normies and half NEET spackers?

>>67575404
spray it directly into my mouth x

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>the average hilary supporter

starting my binge drinking session, may interrupt it with a wank at some point

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KEIRA tbqh

>>67575231
hu dat

>>67575486
good lad

keep getting the word 'calle' on the captcha lads, far more than any other word. what is calle?

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>>67575376

>>67575130
i had a dream that i had an evil twin brother who was trying to kill me and we were both little kids, and i was running away from him. i ended up in crazy steep mountains and i made a weird plastic shotgun to fire shotgun shells, but the shells were just 20 gauge bird shot so it didn't have much killing power

>>67575067
this

>>67575466
Bet your life on 100% latter

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I'm very happy to announce that Emily and I are now engaged!
Even though she completely deserves having a ring put on it, she had no idea it was coming!
We went for a little walk around Center Parcs, and they had all the Christmas lights up, we got to this bridge that lead back to our hotel room and Emily was just saying how she would love us to make this sort of trip away a tradition, so I stopped her on the bridge and said that I'd like to make everything we do together into a tradition, dropped to one knee, pulled the ring box out and asked the question! - she thought I was joking for a second - then when she realised I was serious, the look on her face was priceless, never seen her so happy!
Emily's been the most amazing person to ever come into my life, she's stood by me through thick and thin! Marriage is for richer for poorer, in sickness and health, and she's already done all that!
I've never met a person who's so genuinely caring and thoughtful, even towards complete strangers! She's loving and compassionate, talented and determined! She's ambitious, she's driven, she's creative, she's fit, she's smart, she's gorgeous, she's rediculous and hilarious, but most of all, she's my soul mate and I'm going to spend the rest of my life with her!

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>>67575377
There's about, what, 100 of us in total?

Would be an absolute rager of a night

>>67575486
what are you drinking

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welcome to the midlands powerhouse

>>67575356
he is a loser tbf, dirty money trust fund babby

>>67575531
yeah his life sucks

changing it up lads
shoving this on desu

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OraL6lKoyXE

that dj ez jingle thing brings back memories from when i saw him live mandied out my nut

thanks for reading

>>67575508
is that a new family?

they're both bang tidy tbf

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>>67575452
>Zero makeup. Your first thoughts that you see. Over 36 years on HRT (started at age 15). Had SRS at a very young age (21) but never use blockers. That time blockers didn't exist where I was from.

>>67575529
red wine

>>67575550
might have a cushy life but he's a loser

howling and screaming and shrieking

willy never understand transfreaks

how can a 28 year old man suddenly just decide they're a woman

>>67575603
>willy

Freudian slip.

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>>67575568

>>67575568
don't let pakipoo see this or he will do his nut

>>67575603
I'm going to wake up as a rainbow dinosaur tomorrow

need a wee

this thread is pretty far out

>>67575633
holy shit that was a genuine accident. fuck me

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k-on

>>67575572
I should have bought some

>>67575486
proper night

>>67575589
he made his millions from playing poker lid

thinking about having another ale in the hope that it will allow me to sleep for a few hours what do you think?

>>67575508
Loved last week when they were both looking at the dad

>>67575682
think you should get stay up and get smashed desu

>>67575603
>suddenly just decide

iirc eddie izzard said he knew when he was 4 he wanted to dress like a woman

they just hide it

*fucks you*

>>67575673
haha

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>>67575365
Do cute kids turn into ugly adults? I have a feel nathan will be pretty ugly later on

do you sell tagines

>>67575704
work at 6 (SIX) senpai

would be out getting smashed otherwise :x

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hair looks so shit lads could cry

>>67575734
oh dare

need to get a haircut tomorrow but cannot be remotely arsed

>>67575603
can't relate to it myself but i figure it must be like every day for years being told you're a bird even though you know you're not. and you have to wear women's clothes and feel like a twat doing it. and then one day you go ah fuck it i'll get an inflatable knob and cut my tits off.

BIG TUNE.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sfhp1-69Y8U

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>>67575639
some are pretty convincing

>>67575675
come ver

can't believe Leicestershire is not following the world chess championship

it's only on once a year

mind blowing

Anyone watch Question Time last night?

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>>67575516

>>67575720
I'm an optimist, I'm sure he'll be handsome-cute.

>>67575720
nonce

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work tomorrow

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Is Wrighty a national treasure in Britland?

>>67575781
and the next day

Poo in the

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>wank to porn
>start imagining myself as the girl
WHY DO I DO THIS I LIKE FANNY NOT WILLY

>>67575775
nonce

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>>67575726

>>67575761
what was Dimbleby thinking, asking all those questions?

got a new game for friday/saturday/sunday night

for every pint i drink i have a wank

>>67575801
EXTREMELY bent

the royal family are really hard done by. they have to pay tax on the crown estates (aka land they took from the people by force), so unfair.

>>67575519
I would back any one of you lads

Would jump in without a second thought if some normie started shit

>>67575707
*cums*

>>67575681
and where did he get the "startup capital"? what gave him the confidence to risk that much money? the knowledge that daddy would fix it if he didn't get lucky

>>67575760
might watch the final desu what do you think?

>>67575834
a small loan of a million dollars

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https://youtu.be/VHJeqPVGTUY

I AM A PREFECT!

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flight to Bratislava in 10 hours

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is he autistic

>>67575793
absolutely

>>67575817
Wew

>>67575793
god no, he's like a special lad they allow on tv cos he won a competition or something. they literally can't let him on the telly or radio without a designated person next to him acting as his thinking brain

how do you make a gay fuck a girl?

shit in her cunt

>>67575867
yes

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Post quality brand names you can trust.

>>67575867
either way /pol/ wants to fuck him

>>67575888
sharing this post on the 'book

Do you think normies who only like vanilla porn get the same degree of satisfaction as I do with my kinky shit? I can watch a regular porno and do a perfectly satisfactory wank, but if I'm reading a really good femdom erotica then I can genuinely lose hours in pure pleasure. Can't really imagine a normie having the same response to normal tits and arse.

>>67575888
Best post on the site

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>>67575793
yeah he's a proper english bloke

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>>67575897

>>67575864

go spread the /brit seed

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me too

New coworker at workplace (mcdonalds) is from Englan. He's white. What should I say to him tomorrow? He's around 25

Wonder how you can just abandon hope of ever getting a girl without feeling guilty

R A Y
W I L L I A M
J O H N S O N

laptop speaker is not loud enough

want to put the big one on but it'll get me evicted

Lads, how much feel can you feel?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdFzMLZAXEM

>>67575932
so much #respect

>>67575940
just shaved the public hair for the first time in a long while

>>67575871
>>67575878
>>67575932
Hmm.. Interdasting...

>>67575837
Karjakin defensive play has been very entertaining and intriguing to witness

He's really getting underneath Carlsens skin, i think it's a great match up

hoping they end up drawing every single match and they have to have it decided by bulling bullet chess like the rules state

check out Karjakin stutter o.O


https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=940&v=m3ruYXCkjdo

>>67575897
Really good shop

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kei-on

>>67575932
Not surprising

Wrighty takes pride in his career, after all he was laying bricks in his twenties

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>>67575851
I shall tell you where we are. We're in the most extreme and utter region of the human mind. A dim, subconscious underworld. A radiant abyss where men meet themselves. Hell, Netley. We're in Hell.

>>67575953
what did he do?

>>67575964
this guy looks like my state's governor

>>67575897
>>67576024
farmfoods is better than this

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>>67575867
Absolutley

>>67576043
*maths
also his face makes me feel sick, never seen a face like it

>>67576064
let out an absolute stinker

did this before and evacuated half the dance floor

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finally found true love lads

love you guys

>>67575994
used to love this cunt when I was a wee lad

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>>67576083
>10 year old is tired at 3am

Alert the media

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keion

>Fresh batches of liberal tears in January and March
ahh yes

freezing outside today

nearly froze my knackers off on the way to work haha

not too happy about this brexit lark if i'm being honest

its ok if you're a greggs scoffing x-factor watching northern spacker, but if you're an cosmopolitan like me it's a bit of a right ruddy head.

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>>67576131
innit

>>67575959
Give me something

http://news.sky.com/story/mars-blames-rising-costs-for-maltesers-reduction-10662160
Lads

You think this is funny?

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redhead socialist qts tbqh

apologize for harry potter

Feel like being creative

Might write something

Don't know what though

>>67576113
>Anglo women

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*enters the thread*

alri

>>67576184
Are you drunk and/or high?

>>67576177
apologise for literally inventing immigration

>>67576200
gurning my face off mate

>>67576200
No

I could neck a bit of the whisky I've got on the desk though

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>>67576149
proper

>>67576190
:)

>>67576177
someone didn't make their national quidditch team eh

>>67575297
Finally you guys learned something from us. You can shart in mart too!

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kon

>>67576200
been playing my buttplug actually

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Lonely at work lads, come see me i'll sort you a pint x

>>67576083
>>67575867
>10 years old
>awake at 3 in the morning
>dad LITERALLY became the president elect
>acts a bit weird

1 beer left lads

(before i can start on the tinnies haha)

>>67576190
haha look the yank is fat

>>67576233
thats cultural appropriation

>>67576184
write a haiku m8
they really are something great
or just masterbait

>>67576177
harry potter >>>> sweden tbqh

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Fuck, marry, kill

Liverpool is at an under-16s disco right now necking bare panda pops

>>67576171
They've been waiting for Brexit to get away with this shite

Glad I loathe chocolate, but the normies have been going mental

don't get why any in the olden days would live in the uk when u could migrate to the US and live a better life as opposed to living in this dreary fuckhole

i mean at least we have the excuse that it is diffiuclt to migrate there, but they had no excuse.

>>67576162
Guess I'll just talk about Brexit with this dude

Thanks for nothing dickheads

degenerate fetish to be quite frank

>>67576286
is liverpool a n*rmie twat or not, can't tell

>>67576266
Innit?

>>67576285
Fuck
Marry
Kill

>>67574946
vinnie jones is the best

essex is playing normie dubstep music through his beats by dre headphones while shitposting

>>67575496
i support this

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Would you lads?

>>67576312
aye 'tis

Developed severe and crippling balance/vertigo problems
>Fucks up my ability to work and makes me generally act like a weirdo
>Walking funny, slurring speech, literally falling over
>Referred to consultant ENT
>Thinks it's anxiety
>even though my feet are blistered to fuck from walking funny
>referred to clinical psychologist
>however also referred to neurologist and MRI scan to rule other shit out

I fucking hate it when doctor's always jump to the "history of mental health problems" meme whenever something goes wrong with my health. I swear I could have a giant fucking gaping bleeding and oozing hole in my head and they'd put it down to mental health. It's an easy cop out.

So anyway, how's your day anon?

>>67576299
call him a gormless tosser

it's a british greeting

>>67576308
jury's out

>>67576266
Fookin Rite m8,

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you guessed it

>>67575997
>want to put the big one on but it'll get me evicted
tell us what happened lad

>>67576022
>hoping they end up drawing every single match and they have to have it decided by bulling bullet chess like the rules state
thats fucking mental i can't believe they do that haha

but yeh i will watch it tomorrow i will set a reminder

>>67576276
There was an /int/ general called /brit/
Which quite liked to think it had wit
But in actual fact
The quality lacked
And all of the posting was shit

watching iacgmooh lads, i like watching shit celebs eating bugs and testicles ngl. anyone noticed how that banjo lad from diversity talks like barry shitpeas?

<reddit flag> is <x>

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>>67576043
god that post-referendum period was amazing

felt like things were actually going mental for a period

k-on is grossly overrated

>>67576175
very cute
lovely smile

>>67576331
>dubstep
no
>beats by dre headphones
no, through my macbook speakers
>shitposting
of course x

>>67576363
landlord said multiple people in the building had complained about loud music and thumping "that goes on throughout the night"

*leaves you speechless*

>>67576353
is it monogatari?

>>67576286
what is greater london up to?

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This is the new chief in-house advisor to the President of the United States on national security issues.

What a time to be alive

>>67576350
*sharts unexpectedly*

>>67576363
best place to watch it is at twitch / chessnetwork with jerry commentating

comfiest man i've ever come across :3 no exaggeration

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BK5QdJ715zw

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>>67575897

>>67576285
kfm

>>67576285
I'd force 3 to watch me decapitate 1&2 and then rape 3 brutally over the course of a 2 week period, video tape it and then send it to her parents on VHS

>>67576420
damn

>>67576346
alrai

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>>67576456

>>67576420
He doesn't realize that other countries aren't obsessed with social media.

carpet bomb the middle just blow the whole place to smithereens

>>67576285
fuck 3

marry 1

kill 2

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>>67576413
idk lol

who's your favourite lass, lad?

>>67576346

I've been struggling to walk properly and stand recently. I'm standing talk to someone and I feel an oncoming weakness and I have to fight to not collapse. I put it down to my benzo abuse.

>>67576403
Those few weeks were fucking insane.

>Leave Wins
>Cameron resigns
>Farage resigns
>Bennet resigns
>Tory, Labour and UKIP leadership elections
>New Government formed

There was like 4 different terrorist attacks in one week during summer too. Literally every day for about a month I was glued to the news.

>>67576410
why haven't you invested in headphones yet?

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legs

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best weather girl coming through

>>67576439
ESCUSE ME SUR
I SED ESCUSE ME
DAT IZ CULTURAL APPOOPIATIONS

>>67576420
US leaders all have to cuckle up the Saudis. Trump will be no different.

>>67576544
i have earphones but i don't want to put them in

i want to put on loud music and dance around my flat

That Sainsbury's song is so catchy lads
Corden is a decent singer

>>67576530
not xanax lad?
do a bit of swimming

might have to merk my prof for choosing a really obscure notation in his lecture notes

>>67576452
haha yeh i've seen this video before

>>67575831
Right back atcha lad

>>67576572
>starts clapping
>tips you

>>67576583
work part-time at sainsbury's had the watch that stupid fucking advert like 5 times so far

*celebrates*

>>67576551
Screeching

>>67575932
fuck

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>>67576509
Yui. Ritsu is a close second,

is anyone else autistically afraid of playing music out of speakers?

>>67576683
Yeah

Always use headphones

>>67576646
BOUT DAMMM TIME I GOTTZ DET REPARATIONS MUNE

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want to put my willy in a girl

>>67576542
>UKIP leadership elections
this in particular

has it been explained what the fuck happened with the instant resignation yet?

>>67576694
I'm even autistically afraid to play music out of headphones, lad.

>pizza sandwich

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>>67576674
i'm the same, but mugi is probably my 2nd

>>67576706
would you fuck off already

>>67576683
used to be

then i stopped caring
now i have to care again

>>67576706
did this a couple of days ago

couldn't cum

>>67576717
The party's a shambles post Farage

>>67576694
I'm always paranoid that people can hear what I'm listening to through my headphones in public

>>67576571

i see your girl and raise you Keeley Donovan.

>>67576698
WHATCHU SAY TA ME WHAIT BOI?

>>67576753
excuse me?
you're in my neighbourhood, pal

just ate a charlie bingham lasagne for 2 lads. feel a bit sick. cost me £7. the fish pie is better tbqh

just matched with a proper qt on tinder

is it autistic if i message her straight away

should i wait a bit

Seriously though lads I want to write something

Give me inspiration

>>67576768
use earbuds then

>>67576819
nah do it straight away lid

join the wireless headphone revolution you gay twats

>>67576683
Hell no

I even sing along to what I'm listening to

>>67576836
you just want to see what happens

>>67576793
t. Mr Rogers

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>>67576752
Alright, lad.

I'm only attracted to girls 30+
Anyone else ?

Genuinely not attracted to younger girls.

>>67576819
go for it lad, I'm always wittiest under rpessure

she probably won't reply though

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0Kvd5xc85kh