Embarrassing battles thread

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Finding that he had been beaten by such an inferior foe, the Spanish second-in-command asked Cochrane for a certificate assuring him that he had done all he could to defend his ship. Cochrane obliged, with the equivocal wording that he had 'conducted himself like a true Spaniard'.

>During the evening of 27th, French Dragoon squadrons were riding close to the Spanish position firing their carbines at Spanish skirmishers. Suddenly, without orders, Cuesta's entire Spanish line fired a thunderous volley at the French Dragoons. The French were outside the range of the Spanish muskets, and little harm was done to them. Four Spanish battalions threw down their weapons and fled in panic.
>Wellesley wrote, "Nearly 2,000 ran off on the evening of the 27th...(not 100 yards from where I was standing) who were neither attacked, nor threatened with an attack, and who were frightened by the noise of their own fire; they left their arms and accoutrements on the ground, their officers went with them, and they... plundered the baggage of the British army which had been sent to the rear."

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>Bai Qi ordered the captured soldiers to be executed, presumably bybeing buried alive

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Peter himself was unhorsed. He cried out, "I am the king!" but was killed regardless.

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I don't think the Austrians have ever recovered.

>>67076497
>i-i'm the king, b-baka!
>i donutu calu, kingu-san

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>>67076497
based french bros

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>>67076545
Habsburg scum eternally btfo

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the Carthaginian center was further demoralized and confused by the trampling by their own maddenedelephants

>carthage

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Russia is top embarrassing

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>lose ear
>declare war eight years later

>>67077432
S I S U

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>>67077432
>6th army
>Russia

>>67076497
>Be Crusader
>Kill Christians that have spent their entire lives fighting against islam
Catholics are cancer

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"The French king of the time,Charles VI, did not command the French army himself as he suffered from severe psychotic illnesses with moderate mental incapacitation."

>fighting for a literally retarded king

>>67078230
and they still lost lands

>>67078647
You have no clue what you're talking about.

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China cannot into military.

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>only Keogh's horse survived

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>>67078172
Most British casualties for that war come from this single battle

>>67076002
what is so embarassing about this one? big victory for sure but there are countless victories like this.

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>sing a battle song
>convince Romans to retreat

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>>67071812

>>67080678
>4 children killed
Yanks lmao

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>>67079900

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>>67083840
>Thousands of children raped and killed, COs fragged for trying to stop the madness
>All because they took heavy losses while attacking a vastly outnumbered foe
Limeys lmao

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>>67083813

>>67083996
>Yanks don't understand banter
Imagine my surprise

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>>67080678
>Lame White man

>>67076002
I too enjoy eastern mythology

>>67074044
>auto resolve battle.jpg

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The Zulus were equipped mainly with the traditional assegai iron spears and cow-hide shields, but also had a number of muskets and old rifles though they were not formally trained in their use. The British and colonial troops were armed with the state-of-the-art Martini-Henry breech-loading rifle and two 7-pounder (3-inch, 76 mm) mountain guns deployed as field guns, as well as a rocket battery.

>fight against pointy-stick-wielding savages using state-of-the-art weaponry
>fucking L O S E

>>67087747
Martini rifle had a problem with over heating, wasn't that great.

>>67083742
>holy
>roman
>empire

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The most embarrasing battle in the spanish history wasnt aganist the french nor english but aganist moroco

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> tfw more success against the vietcong than against flightless birds

tl;dr:
> 8 Aussie blokes patrolling a rubber plantation
> bump into a couple thousand vietnamese blokes
> fight them off in the rain for 3 or 4 hours
> help from kiwi artillery and US planes
> literally call down bombs on themselves
> Aussie APCs show up and scare the rest of the Vietnamese off
> Vietnamese never try to beat ADF for the rest of the war

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How did we lose aganist c*nadians?
thanks EU

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>Spanish navy

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>>67090051
spanish navy
2nd part
>1 dead
>hearthstroke

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>>67089854
"war"

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>>67090146
>tfw we didn't just shoot them
>tfw we have to listen to people making fun of us on /int/ because of this

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>tfw the royal navy used to have 17 destroyers

>>67089854

You were wrong. That's how. Stay in your own waters.

>>67087907
It was mostly an issue with the rolled foil cartridge cases and black powder fouling.

>>67087907
>trying to blame it on the rifle

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>disease
>disease
>disease

>>67090700
The rifles had a part to play but really it was the classic British generals being aristocratic retards.

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>>67088635

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>>67071812
the best one is this one

>>67071812

It hardly counts as "against no one" when they left the island booby trapped to fuck.

That's like saying any deaths to land mines Cambodia weren't due to Khmer Rouge.

>>67090146
>>67089854
LOL Now I know why Iceland was supporting Spain

>>67071812
>america lost 309 soldiers to literally nothing

topfuckingKEK

>>67091834

>Hit a sea mine left by the Japanese with their boat
>Literally nothing

Are you retarded?

>>67078647
Are you retarded?
>inb4 I was merely pretending to be retarded

>>67071812
A simple miscalculation! We'll get them next time!

>>67079727
>fighting war against whites in the east
>"I know, let's invade west too!"
Why are commies always so fuckingn retarded?

>>67091857
excuse me leaf, what does the scoreboard say in the op??

>(not present)
jeez learn to read faggot lmao

>>67091603
They weren't.
They were to American stupidity.

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>attempt to invade England
>drown

War movies are usually about important engagements and heroic or at least competent actions.
I want to see a film based on a retarded battle like one ITT, with idiots leading men to die in stupid ways.

>>67094352
Zulu Dawn is a prequel to Zulu and is about the Battle of Isandlwana
>>67087747

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A classic.

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>>67094681
even more embarrassing

>>67084071
neither do you, you autistic dummy

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PREVENT KEBAB prevent kebab

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Japan can't into navy

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>>67077227
>>67077227

>implying Rome didn't spend the majority of the Second Punic War getting wrecked by a bunch of thong-wearing barbarians, horseback-mounted negros, and a lovable ragtag underdog army led by a sandnigger

>Rome

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>>67095392

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>>67095430

>>67095392
>Implying that the Carthaginians weren't an advanced civilisation deliberately wiped from history to prevent a we wuz insurgency

>>67095459

>implying whitey wouldn't shepherding camels around the Sahara while Tyrone parties atop the Eiffel Tower if it weren't for Scipio Cornelius and his meddling legionnaires

>>67079328
Was he the French king who thought he was made of glass?

>>67078647
>Catholics are cancer

welcome to history

>>67079847
>>67091924
t. Cathocucks

>>67090051
>>67090081
>You must treat Spain as you would a pretty woman with a bad temper. Firm and constant and unyielding in your purpose, but flexible and always flattering in form – watching her moods – taking advantages of her prejudices and passions to modify her conduct towards you... logic and sound policy will not guide her unless you take good care of the region of her sentiments first.
—Horatio J. Perry

Man, we really bullied Spain back then

>>67077432
you are top embarrassing

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Continuation_War

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>>67095737
Yes

>>67095190
lol holy shit

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Italians are funny fellas

>>67095790
>835,000 russian casualties
Almost a million russians dead or maimed
I'd call that a success no matter the outcome

>>67077432
Meme war

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More kebab prevention

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>>67097966
+

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All casualties are deaths. So many nobles died that several houses went extinct with that battle.
Among the war prices was the original Dannebrog, the Danish flag.

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back when spain wasnt a piece of shit

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good

>>67083813
Why are they so bad at war?

>>67071812
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_Armada

This was pretty embarrasing. They literally were defeated by women and peasants. At least the spanish armada was defeated, as Elizabeth I said, by the storms.

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>vowed to remain neutral in WW2
>Germany invades our country anyway
>get BTFO'd in a few days because lolnoarmy
>under German occupation for years
>WW2 over
>Indonesia starts shit and wants independence
>send over a ragtag team of malnourished Dutch soldiers and shitty old equipment
>get a k/d ratio of 25:1 against a larger army on their home turf

B T F O
T
F
O

>>67100393
what battle is this?

>>67100610
>against indonesians

color me unimpressed

>>67100618
The siege of Coruña

>>67096613
>2016
>Finland is a joke
>Russia is crawling it's way back to a superpower

And Russia still owns Ladoga and Pechengsky District, and forever will.

Casualties don't matter. After the war Russians had 5 kids each, they quickly recuperated the losses - but lost land, that is forever.

>>67100610
>kill farmers with modern arms
>feel proud

forever Dutch

>>67072636
Nigga pls

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Action_of_9_August_1780

>The Spaniards captured 52 of 55 British vessels, making it one of the most complete naval captures ever made.

>>67100642
Are you proud of your genocide? White scum!

>>67100701
>spain
>white

>>67090051
>>67090081
LOL

>>67089816
3000 morocan tribesman kills 13000+ spaniards explain this

>>67100701
How many indigenous people can we see in USA? How many in Canada?

>>67100782
sissy spaniards

>>67100934
I mean I dont even believe they had 13000 rounds of ammunition lol

>>67100909
there were far more natives in south america than in the north thats a fact

>>67079727
How's that embarassing?
Forces were roughly the same, and the casualties on the Bolshevik side could easily be blamed on the shitty soviet military doctrine akin to starcraft's zerg rush.

And of course we were in defensive positions, while red scum was attacking, the loses are to be expected.

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>>67071812

>>67100909
wtf? anglos only killed indians in self defence! Spanish scum enjoyed killing Indians.

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>>67101207
you a shit

>>67100478
basically Italy lost all its officers in and after WWI and when Mussolini took power he created his Fascist militia and let the army self manage because he thought actual generals would be more competent than him.

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Here's a classic

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>>67083813
>>67100478
>>67101760

J U S T

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>>67102292
how on earth is that possible

>>67102292
thts not even possible

>>67102423
>>67102469
With Italy, any humiliating military defeat is possible

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>>67102662
Our worst defeat of all time.

>>67104410
FROZEN? In Africa? WTF Italy

>>67104410
Where they bantered to death?

>where is your mamma, Luigi? oh wait, it's here sucking my bogan dick

>>67104534
it's obviously fake, use your brains moro de mierda

>>67104578
oh I see my aryan friend

>>67104578
t. moroccan immigrant

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>>67104578
>asking for a second genocide

>>67104618
>>67104687
>>67104726
i facked your mother

9 months later she shit a big turd

hello son how are you son

greetings

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>>67104410
>they angered the roo

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The French Mirage did an excellent job.
Thanks for the planes, France. :^)

>>67105461
fucking kek

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Turkish bath 2

>>67104410
waht the fuck

We are The indiscusses Captains of the worst possible scenario in a battlefield

>>67108559
dem Finnish military

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>>67071812
all these posts and nobody even suspects me.

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Gopniks btfo

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>>67109146
Post the real one

>>67105461
No problem, best merchant !

>>67111799
baitzkrieg man

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Russia against Estonian SS

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Russia against Swedes

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Russia against Finland

>>67102222
kek
nice quads

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>>67102292
>>67104410
>all these retards falling for fake wiki battles

>>67111916
Never4get

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>>67078647
>>67095753
The Pope's a bitch, who's surprised?
>Burn all reformations prior to Luther on the stake
>Have to wage a crusade because some people disagreed slightly with you
>Blame the reformation on Luther alone

>>67111916
still lost and cucked over 50 years xDD pathetic

>>67111961
Everyone who have hoholes on their side suffer bigger casualities
Cursed ppl

>>67100656
>>Russia is crawling it's way back to a superpower
No?

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>>67113433
delet boop

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>choctaw warriors
>freed slaves
>pirates
>farmers
why are the brits so bad at war?

>>67090231
Yeah but now we have a whole 8 frigates, yep a whole 8

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>UN forces number about 2000 accross a wide front
>Attacked by 30000 Chinese
>A few hundred Brits become encircled
>Hold the Chinese off for two days before being captured
>Chinese loose 15000 men in the process and are unable to continue advancing

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>>67091857
>have all the time in the world to disarm the mine or blow it up or just dodge it
>choose to just ram it

>>67083873
>30 000 civilians eaten

Quite the cuisine if you ask me

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>>67095790
lol

>>67076497
Serve him right for siding with heretics.

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>they're firing at our fort
>must be a salute, so let's get some artillery and salute back
>pay a visit to yank ship to say hello
>"we're at war, you know"
>tfw accidentally became prisoner of war
54/54

>>67116440
Germany is so shit at war

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>Kahama in charge of gorilla tactics

>>67100642
Not impressive.

>>67100642
Fuckimh bazi

>>67100782
>>67089816
First guerrilla warfare tactics I read somewhere

>>67079328
>But in August 1392 en route to Brittany with his army in the forest of Le Mans, Charles suddenly went mad and slew four knights and almost killed his brother, Louis of Orléans.
>Either your king will kill you, personally, or the English will.

Brutal

>>67084338

lmao

>the thread is still alive
What the fuck

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>be army of 120 thousand
>siege fort with 800 defenders
>forced to turn back

>>67100233
Which battle? Was this part of the 80 years war?

>>67133480
It will never die

>>67109117
Swedes are modest! You had to declare that you are sunk 146 russian galleys! Top kek

>>67100656
>Russia is crawling it's way back to a superpower
Yeah sure buddy

>>67105461
Wasn't it a logistics war? As in Egyptians didn't put much into feeding/watering their troops?

>>67133541
$ick $kills

>>67137754
Pretty sure this isn't the case. Israel went on the offensive and I guess used some kind of a Blitzkrieg tactic but don't take my word for it, I'm very ignorant about this war.