/brit/

shoutout to my english gf

What the fuck is that gormless nonce Janny up to?

business idea: make /brit/ threads and delete them 150 posts in to ferment revolutionary anti-jans sentiment

Arsenal 1-1 Tottenham

One of the best NLDs I can remember!

>>67059424
heyy x

mi ah mi dons wear no ah poppy

>>67059430
maybe OP got banned. probably the one who mentioned cp

Janny mad haha

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>thread has been up for 15+ minutes
>well over a hundred posts
>decides to delete it

what's his end game?

ordering some pizzas for tonight lads
I get three free dips, what should I go for?

>Go to get food
>There's a hundred men in military garb marching through the street carrying rifles while a marching band plays war tunes
Ah yes, Northern Ireland.

>>67059430
you can't delete threads on /int/ you mong

>>67059502
It was at 220 posts.

Janny needs his throat slashing

>>67059502
when you get banned all your posts are deleted

>Will buy dip for a pizza but wont wear a poppy

State of British people today

have heartburn

*grabs my books and gives myself a look*

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>>67059487
It was because it was a kpop thread

I think /brit/ as a whole should refuse to post in mattys threads because they always get deleted half way through

lads>>67059422

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business idea: marie rose

>>67059518
B T 7
T
7

where are you lad? lurgan? portadown?

FOR FREE

>>67059508
shit
wad
meme

*scurries away*

>>67059539
Poppy would ruin my minimalist aesthetic senpai

>>67059585
>minimalist

grandiose term for poor

>>67059429
>>67059396
>>67059502
>>67059488
>>67059529

get fucked ludford

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soon janny boy :)

>>>/sp/72397026

>that post
>those replies

HATE foreigners

>>67059578
*pursues you in a slightly awkward shuffling motion*

>>67059585
fuck off asos minimalist

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me

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great RESPECT

>>67059632
post boipucci :3

janny has his bf round trying to impress him by deleting a /brit/ thread

>remember how my mum and dad spent thousands upon thousands of pounds on the family courts when they were fighting over me
>I could have had that money

my mum is a cunt

>>67059564
ah yes hello janny
hmm, nope, think i'm gonna keep posting in whatever /brit/ thread is posted first

>>67059631
I am THIS close to filtering you

>>67059612
avg fit costs ~£700 la

>>67059616
i miss these posts

business idea: take all the foreign aid money and just give it to me

You better watch out janny, as a collective we've decided to rally around are Matty and your bullshit deleting of his korean pop threads, better be ready we're coming for you.

downloading Gaspar Noes "Love"

dunnae what to expect if i was being honest

>>67059616
fucking love Bruce's posts

can't believe you lot give him a hard time, they're so good

very unique style

>>67059674
grandiose term for idiotic then

>>67059569
Belfast desu.

plymouth is a shit hole

>>67059706
don't go over your limit mate x

need a gyal come whine pon mi cocky

>>67059706
its good
better than shite like enter the void at least

>>67059632
REALLY need a VERY effeminate bf

>>67059530
this is false

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>>67059410

Anyone notice there is suddenly a Korea channel on Sky 690?

>>67059665
neither of them wanted you lad, worth the money to not have to deal with your gormless boat day in day out

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>>67059661
>>67059735
:3

>>67059723
where's doing military parades today

how many flegs can you see from your window?

>>67059518
always get a bit uncomfortable when i see military close to me

really not attracted to the gf's body any more

really need a big titted gf with a nicer vag

finished my essay on the philosophy of Terrence Malick
literally the hardest essay I've done and not part of my major

me and the frenchman talk quite a lot :3
wonder if he realises it's all me he's replying to

>>67059649
atrocious kit

>>67059717
>he doesn't invest in quality outerwear

kek

>not having a decent topcoat
>not having a GoreTex-Pro shell
>not having high quality knits

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>>67059742
fuck off matt

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hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yes another sad episode

getting a bit bored of this tripe

why do we wear poppies for world war one but don't commemorate any other wars
seems a bit arbitrary
>muh great war
it was a good war but I'm not sure it would even make my top five

>They fought for are freedom!
>*forces you to wear a paper flower on your clothes for a week*
Ah yes

>>67059738
it's true for the most recent posts at least. not sure about threads

>farcenal

going to finish texhnolyze today lads, 18 episodes boshed off so far

it's pretty good, wish i got it off my backlog all those years ago

>>67059811
It's for all British death in wars past, present and future come on mate

>>67059829
Rasheed

>>67059829
RA
SHEED

>>67059805
keep covering yourself mate so we dont see your skinnyfat bod hahahahhhaa waheyy

>>67059742
Is that a Kermode Pepe? Very impressive

>>67059811
it's for all wars you numpty

>>67059811
rasheed

the poppy was adopted after WWI but isn't specific to WWI, its remembrance for all wars (basically anything after WWI)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UX5hYu3S3U4

>>67059832
that's also false

lads theres some hard red lump on my cats skin

what did we do to upset him?

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fuck's sake lads the new gf is a virgin and so was my other gf from two years ago

fed up of holding their hand through all this beginning sex shite

just give me a well experienced slag gf any day

>>67059908
no. it happened to me when I posted 1 bad post and noticed all replies i got prior to it was replying to nothing lol

*licks your ear*

>>67059888
i'm well on my way to otter mode mate, try again.

>>67059768
Bt14 la. There's 3 marching bands on the go. Counting the flags in the parade, probably 30 or so.

>>67059811
It was the war with the highest casualties for this country.

>>67059909
Probably a tic bite desu mate

Is there any grass around where you live? Especially long grass.

absolutely love white bread

got a VERY good idea for an android app lads, just got no idea how to make money off it

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>>67059686
>>67059710
ah the good ol days when Ed-boy was still kicking around with us

RIP

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Look at this fucking dave

>>67059920
>not having a cheeky bit on the side

>>67059945
enjoy being tired all the time

>>67059924
trust me lad I know, sometimes he'll delete all my posts, sometime he doesn't

>mfw flicking through shitty music channels and vintage are playing Suzanne by Leonard Cohen

shit just made my day

>>67059796
one of hardest essay I remember doing was in college (so when I was 17). had to put in relation sophocle's oedipus rex and pasolini's oedipo re and explain the various forms of violence in those things. had to give them a meaning too, not only detail them

found the runt lads >>67059945

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I wonder how it feels to get doxxed. Just couldn't imagine becoming a laughing stock on here, having my picture posted in every thread, people knowing where I work and live and other aspects of my personal life.

Business idea: Real life death eaters that suck the soul out of normies

>eating bread
plebs
enjoy your empty calories

>>67059796
ay post it lad

>>67059734
yeah the novelty of enter the void wore off after about 4 minutes

I stand alone was good though

>>67059945
bet you love dip too

>>67059993
why exactly do you hate matt again?

>>67059976
>owning a TV
>watching TV
>watching music channels

Third Eye Status: Obliterated

*dies of dysentery*

>>67059993
multiple people know me or have recognised me from 4chan
luckily I don't put anything stupid online

>>67059993
t. mark davis

>not dipping the crusts of your sandwich

>>67059993
had a dream where i was a /brit/ meme once, face kept getting posted here but it was all in good fun and we had a laugh

>>67059993
Happened to me a couple years ago but no one posts me anymore

>>67060024
he's the one who posts "korean pop" at the start of every thread

>>67059726
delete this post immediately

Need a good film to have on in the background whilst I apply for jobs.

Any suggestions?

>>67060013
Eat decent multigrain bread

Stuff I eat is 125kcal/7g protein/5g fibre a slice. It's god-tier nutrition.

>>67059619
very witty posts ngl

do you reckon they have good banter at MI5

>>67059943
not really but it does look more like an insect bite than cancer or something

what should I do

>>67060013
I do
why else would I eat bread

>>67060044
Are you the 5'6 and built like a Chinese fashion blogger runt?

Find the relationship between Australia and 4chan quite perplexing

*recognises Luca*

more like Luc - Ah yes

>>67060014
pretty sure if I posted it the university's anti-plagiarism system would pick it up
it's really not very good, but already over a week late so I had to just cut my losses and hand it in

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Can't fathom how dead you'd have to be inside not to enjoy bread.

http://efukt.com/21367_Cuck_Has_Second_Thoughts.html

thoughts?

praise
allah

>>67059993
thought we all liked matt here

hes sound

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67060109
he's here lads

>>67060102
Yes, read an article a few years ago about how they were desperately trying to change the culture to make it more appealing.

They've been advertising on mums net and making loads of efforts to accommodate families and LGBTQ because apparently there was a huge culture of getting rat arsed at the pub after work and driving fast cars.

can't seem to watch trap porn, sissy porn or tranny porn without the constant thought of "that's just a mentally ill bloke dressed up as a girl with a wig"

and that does nothing for me

regular trap porn connoisseurs- do you just go into a fantasyland where you pretend the bloke is just a girl with a dick?

>>67060103
Just leave it a few days but keep checking.

Tics itch so cats will scratch the tic and could rip it off, leaving the head inside and creating that little lump.

It's possible it could get infected but it's never happened to me before.

Where is the lump?

>>67060079
kes

>>67060128
bet you like circuses and dipping your pizza too

>>67060141
rash'

>>67060109
Looking forward to managing the old call centre again next week, Matty?

>>67059993
Mat is the only Alpha here

>he has a job where he can fire useless cunts
>probably moved out of his parents house
>has a car
>will soon wife a korean qt

most people here don't like him because they're jealous

Getting closer to girls hasn't made me happier it's just made me even more insecure and paranoid

Fuck sake

>>67060140
All part of the role-playing. The woman's a Jew anyway, so who even cares?

>>67060155
on her back, near the tail

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>>67060109
>still trying to damage control

give it up matty

>>67060140
fuck, that's just sad.

>>67060152
>huge culture of getting rat arsed at the pub after work and driving fast cars.

how does someone get into MI5 (unironically)

>>67060147
this
he's a top lad

>>67060079
big wet asses 19

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work in labs in the university's chemistry department but not technically affiliated with the university

on my ID card it says Dr even though I don't have a PhD and I can get into the library and prey upon the 18 year old slags even though I'm not a student wahey haha

>I don't like bread
t. Northerner

>>67060172
>>will soon wife a korean qt

Why do UKIP racists like Matt have a thing for Asian girls

>>67060147
Matthew Ludford

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LEAVE MATTY ALONE

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2 guys in their forties just passed my gaff on fucking skateboards. one of them had one of those stupid hip-hop caps on

>>67060118
yes
had someone come up to me at work and talk about how I used to post on /fa/

Girl I like recommended me something I actually liked. Literally never had this happen before.

I really don't want to fuck this up.

>>67060234
t. matt

>>67059829
>forces

you don't have to rasheed

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>When he doesn't eat Burgen

Read flag ladies! x

>>67060172
Mattbait

>>67060199
Literally just apply on their website (although rumour has it that they still hand pick a lot of people from places like Oxbridge)

>>67060172
he has no friends and is probably a virgin though

callum is more of an alpha than matt

>when he eats supermarket bread

red flag RED FLAG

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>>67060242
tears

I have a 5'8 friend and I can't help but laugh at everything he does

Bonne idée: parler français

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>>67059961
don't mention that name here

how could he just up and leave us

an absolute master of his craft

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>>67060223
>racist
>likes asians

>>67060253
its not nice

>>67060256
>places like Oxbridge)

wonder what degree yer'd need

might apply under the gay transexual aboriginal ticket

met someone i saw on 4chan once and asked for their autograph

ISNT IT FUNNY how Matt, a Brexiter, contacted the ECJ to get his listings pulled from google after being doxxed

>>67060289
fuck off pretentious twat

Manlets got a bum deal tbqh

The genetic lottery is a real fucker. Thankfully I won the jackpot.

http://www.strawpoll.me/11586390

Need help lads

My mum is 4'9

Life at home is the only time I feel tall

funny isn't it

think the girl I'm seeing also goes on 4chan tbqh
says cuck and likes 4chan memes on facebook

>>67060303
I actually really like it tbqh

>>67060314
yw

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Fancy some cheeky spirit cooking lads?

>he doesn't exclusively eat canned bread

lmoa

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>>67060316
Screaming at the idea of this, what an absolute weapon

captcha is taking the fucking piss

>>67060342
literal midget

>>67060349
not really.

going to revisit /b/ for an hour, wish me luck

>>67060307
There isn't a set degree but it seems they have a strong penchant for people who speak languages (Chinese/Arabic/Punjab etc) and people who do things like history where it's about digesting lots of information and picking up trends and key bits.

You might also get approached as an informant, where you belong to a group (i.e. might be in an Asian community that's being watched) and asked to inform them.

They have a section on their website about your rights if this happens and if you have to help or whether or not you can say no thanks.

https://www.mi5.gov.uk/agent-faqs

>No-one can force you to assist - it is a matter for you. However if you are approached we would be keen for you to think about why we would like to talk to you. You may be someone who we think is in a unique position to provide information to help keep the UK secure. What we are asking you to do is critical to ensuring the country remains safe and may potentially save lives.

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>>67060327
>the final duel scene in Barry Lyndon

>>67060242
just can't imagine this

even if I did see someone from /brit/ I don't think I would mention it

>>67059993
i got doxxed once but everyone stopped caring within 2 threads lol

>>67060342
My mum is 5', my dad is 5'7 ish, I'm 6'1

No idea what happened there. I look like both of them too so I don't think there's any cuckoldry involved.

>>67060189
That's not usually where tics go.

I'd still leave it a few days, if it hasn't started going down or gets bigger take them to the vet.

>>67060399
Looks like that's first for me

In the mood for old period stuff.

not happy with mummy lads

>click on captcha
>it fades to white

or

>have to draw a fucking dodecahedron around a biplane

FUCK OFF

NOT a fan

>>67060409
literally me

>>67060361
You best have a joke for this shit because I won't bother replying again

>>67060409
i still remember zac

>>67060321
Non. Ferme ta bouche s'il te plaît.

mum, dad, i want you to meet my gf
*brings in laptop*
*waits for skype to load up*

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Weather is comfy as fuck here lads

>>67060397
neat tbf

might look into ASIO

>>67060412
maybe your great great grandad was a Giant from the Welsh mountains

>>67060455
mum, dad, i want you to meet my gf
*brings in nobody*

>>67060409
alri mark

>>67060152
>huge culture of getting rat arsed at the pub after work and driving fast cars

that sounds great though

>Drake
>biggest rapper in the world atm

is there an element of irony to this guy's appeal or something? every time he does the usual 'badass rapper' poses he just looks like a fucking retard/goofball
>he literally wiggles his arse when he dances

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How does the fact that Liverpool will be top of the Premier League in a few hours make you feel?

quite good

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BM54jXndyvQ

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please win lads

>>67060442
>he doesn't use legacy
Spacker 2bh

>>67060450
génocide par pomme de terre

>>67060409
lots of people have only had their youtube discovered. doesn't really count as doxing

brits are filthy subhuman animals

what's the worst thing I've ever done?

probably shouldn't say hehe

Arsenal.....

>>67060065
Same lad that dreamed you were obese in the picture despite being skinny and everyone was spamming "the STATE of you"?

>>67060501
legacy never works for me

>need to work on my assignment
>too busy searching for /d/ porn and archiving it

>>67060494
How come Klopp seems so likeable?

>>67060484
To us, yes. To a 30 stone SJW HR person it sounds like hell.

Trying to imagine caring about men kicking a ball around a field. Struggling here lads.

>>67060494
Glad

I'd like to see them win the Premier league in my lifetime

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>>67060455
>mum, dad, i want you to meet my gf
>*brings in laptop*
>*waits for skype to load up*

>>67060506
rude

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>>67060490
I got UK tings on the whatsapp now like +44 on the roads

>>67060526
>>67060530
great lads

>>67060529
extremely bad lad

>When you see she's actually been busy doing stuff and she's just blanking you

I need to get around to killing myself already

>>67060516
left her bloody

>>67060462
You've literally just failed. Congrats

>>67060405
I don't really mind tbqh
feel like every young Australian lad posted on /fa/ at one point
had someone at uni just come up to me and say my name and then say they were also from /fa/
just said my niceties then moved on

*sighs as I go overdrawn drawing out a 20*

Hi Mr Patel, can I get 10 quid on this *pulls out leccy key* and a 10 pound top up for Tesco mobile please

>>67060558
unsure about this gimmick

you scare me pierre

>>67060558
unironically shagged my gf while she's been bleeding like an open wound from her fanny multiple times

>>67060520
no but a few weeks ago i had a dream about some ginger girl i used to fancy in school and blood pouring out of her fanny and told you lads about it

>>67060516
just told that black man to call the police

Actually quite like Kate Bush

>>67060588
It's weird how fucking shit life is for people in poverty.

Printer broke once and I went to the local library and it was just full of people playing candy crush and typing HOW TO GET JOB into google.

Nearly offed myself at the thought of it.

just duck my pond up senpai

>>67060502
>la grande reddition

I prefer Kate shaven

Actually quite like Kate's bush

>>67060626
creasing at this post

true though

>I'd love to fuck a werewolf
Underrated post

imagine living in olden times when people bought vinyl not to be edgy but just because it was normal.

Having sex isn't that hard. All of our ancestors achieved it.

business idea: pizza with ketchup

actually SNORTING with laughter at this https://youtu.be/ufHJO9vXLiw

>>67060631
haha y'a reddit dans un mot !!!!!!!!!

>>67060596
she locked herself in the loo to cry in peace and i gave in a few kicks on the door to scare her haha then i nicked some money from her wallet and bought a pain bagnat

how to get job

does homosexuality vary by nationality? reckon the french are more bent than us 2bh

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>>67060626
>HOW TO GET JOB into google

Amazing how often you lads seem to have dreams about /brit/
Last dream I can remember I was arguing with this manlet and said "well at least I don't look like Samwise Gamgee" and we got in this big fight.
Even /brit/ dreams are more sophisticated than that.

did that orbiter ever find out the name of his song?

think I remember what it was called

>>67060688
I put all relationships and intimacy on a massively overinflated pedastal.

It's part of the reason I fuck it up.

>>67060626
If this was happening in you local library you must be from a runt shithole anyway

>>67060692
Several thousand turbo-runts have beat you to it la.

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>>67059993
>tfw impossible to dox
>I could write my name here and nobody would be able to dox me

hehe

ITS LEEFAL D'BIZZLE RECORDS

>>67060654
>>67060639
tagged you two as redditors

>>67060706
monster

unironically though

how do i get a job

having some clean water

>>67060734
>Rasheed

>>67060722
coldplay or some shit
i dont think he did but I missed a couple of threads since this morning

Being long term unemployed is grim as fuck lads. Imagine having no purpose in life whatsoever, other than traipsing down to the job centre every week to lie to your work coach about what you've been doing, signing on and buying special brew and baccy with your 100 quid a fortnight while sitting in your damp social rented studio flat.

>>67060734
Rafi Axys

>>67060734
>Tfw posted on 4chan for years
>Tfw take it so seriously all my online accounts are super secure

Got hired for a new job and they said they'd spent hours online trying to find me and couldn't find any trace of me anywhere.

Doing a sad

>>67060734
do it then

>>67060583
I forget this isn't a secret club anymore

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>>67060734
>google my name with combinations of my street and town
>zero results

>>67060734
t. john smith

My name is Eddie.

Doxx me, baby!

AURORA BOREALIS

Oh shit, Are Moggy is on the cover of this week's Spectator Life Magazine.

Will have a look when I visit my parents haha, the old man is subscribed.

NEED a latex gf

>>67060761
not many like that anymore.
UC means people go in and out of work regularly
and long term out of work are usually on sick, DLA, PIP, ESA, Income support

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drinking myself into a stupor with a playlist of songs about girls thinking about how much I want to be wanted by another human being

top sunday


https://youtu.be/UfmkgQRmmeE

>>67060712
no, don't think so

there are countries where there are open homosexuals, and countries where there are repressed homosexuals

loads of Arabs have been caught in scandals where they've been secretly having sex with men in foreign countries

>>67060789
THE BEER XDD

only person in the country with my name

Going to need some suggestions for choons to play on Spotify whilst I'm in the shower lads

business idea: post the name of someone you despise here so he get doxxed

but now that i think of it it wouldn't really be useful

>>67060786
>just googled my name and address
>someone can find me on the electoral roll

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>>67060719
had a dream once as well where behind my house there was a wooden bridge leading to a small island with a little building on it, so i went there and it was full of women laying on the ground looking at me and i went to shag one of them but their fannies were filled with dirt, for some reason i was shagging and licking them out anyway and thats all i remember

>>67060779
did this too but then other people started posting my name or tagging me in shit so i still showed up reee

need to shit out a fat poo

>>67060834
so we'll never know because we can only see the difference between open and repressed homos

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>>67060821
we all do

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can't fucking WAIT
Tonight 8pm BBC1

am impossible to dox because I have virtually no online presence

>>67060841
try

the WORLD

>>67060712
its just that here people arent insecure

gave the so-called gf an orgasm this morning lads

>>67060854
randy bugger

>>67060888
Expected you to say that we're sissy brit bois 2bh. which is probably true

>>67060888
reckon you're a bender

>>67060843
Jonathan Giles

fuck that cunt

>>67060877
hype

Had an imagination wank this morning about having tender passionate missionary-style sex with an imagined gf.

Quite nice, been a long time since I've had a mind-only wank. Always ends in satisfying big cum as well.

Is there anything better than euphoric 90s vocal house with piano chords?

trying to write a personal statement for a PhD lads

fucking nightmare

haven't written anything like this for two years and my writing is all over the bloody shop

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>>67060832
good lad
give this a watch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLuQ0MGLBXU

>BBCs first 4K show

what happens if I watch it on my 1080p TV? will it explode?

>>67060909
good footballer though

Tom Granger

good luck boys, all the hints I'll give you x

>>67060851
link to website?

>>67060834
in certain countries, especially east Asia, they think young, handsome Brits are all gayboys

desu after what I read on here that's a fairly accurate statement

my mate took some coke and got so paranoid he flushed all his drugs down the bog

boxers and socks are a fiver

AJ needs to get on a skincare regime

gave the so-called willy an orgasm this morning lads

>>67060934
you can watch it on 4 tv's at once

>google myself
>literally nothing

do I even exist?

>>67060922
EXCELLENT post

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NcYP613fCwE

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>Tfw doxxable

>>67060908
im not
but you're a poof haha gonna tell deano and smitty about this

>>67060939
doxxable info

>>67060936
son of a bastard, he's a footballer these days?

fuck me

>>67060877
what time is it on?

>>67060886
nah but true for my little brother
I have a common Italian first name but fairly rare Italian last name
brother has a rare Anglo first name as well as the rare Italian last name

been doxxed on here before but it went under the radar haha

Doing a Balearic

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6HA32uBeJwY

Got some belter posts lined up. Won't be posting them in this thread though, waiting for the nu.

When I search my name, all that comes up is some rapist that got jailed

Should I change my surname to avoid confusion?
Would employers actually mix them up?

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>>67060930
comfy video

not the biggest fan of the song but cheers anyway

>>67060922
early 2000s eski synths

>>67060990
also a fantastic post

>>67060917
Vocaroo this

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the 9/11 hijackers were homosexuals

nap time :3

unironically watching CNN

kellyanne conway literally looks like a methhead

have no idea how could someone get doxxed
maybe stop using reddit flags?

>>67060987
>rare anglo first name

excuse me?

got 5 cubic metres of gas left on the card lads

hopefully should last a while

>>67060917
imagination wanks are the best 2bh i dont know why i even bother with porn

>>67060960
whenever i search my name it usually comes up with a lot of black people

wasn't aware i had a black name

got 5 cubic metres of gas left in my colon lads

>Thinking I haven't compiled a detailed dossier on every single one of you runts

Just WAITING for an excuse to release the sordid details of your /brit/posting to your nearest and dearest.

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>>67060973
Thought benders weren't repressed in your country, why do you deny it?