/brit/

wank

Would you please kindly FUCK OFF OUTTA HERE?!

Really wish I had a child tbqh.

What's the best laptop brand to buy?

Not Apple.

>>66465206
Macbook Pro or Dell XPS

Nothing else is worth it

>>66465206
acer

>>66465206
thinkpad

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Alright everyone, comeone, group hug.
Get in here Ireland, you're in the group too.

On course to read ~55 books this year

>>66465181
Just counting down the days until universal basic income.

>>66465206
Apple, then Asus I guess?

Sony used to make decent laptops but they stopped manufacturing them
Apple is the only decent brand really, but understandable seeing the price

>>66465206

Lenovo ThinkPad™

>>66465206
apple, wipe it, install gentoo

>>66465238
>tfw I get this and get wages

Gonna repost this because (you)s are the only thing that will make me feel bettrer.:
The onetis rejected me. That's the fourth one in a row lads. I want to die.

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>>66465238

Oh fuck off reddit scum reeeee

the large hadron collider was a waste of time

>>66465243
>>66465229
do NOT get a thinkpad

lenovo is fucking trash absolute dog shit DO NOT whatever you do please I am warning you

>>66465280
What's wrong with Lenovo?

>>66465266
don't let it bring you down m8, if you ask out enough people one of them will say yes

>>66465280

b-but the memes!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0qBaBb1Y-U
a great, great song

>messaged a girl last night on tinder: "hey qt"
>replied today
>not drunk

what do

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>winter is coming and can't bike as much

1-5 cut my head off
6-9 reconquer the continent and put the frogs back in their place
0 wildcard, experient in anime

>>66465316
>>66465308
i bought one and I am suffering

>>66465277
we discovered higgs boson with it tho, which was one of its goals

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>You hear a creaking
>Open up your home Wi-Fi camera system
>See somthing is trying to break into your Basement Bunker
What do lads?

>>66465321
what did she say

>>66465321
get drunk

>>66465312
the problem is this one did say yes but her friends convinced her otherwise at the last minute

99% of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mum does more dope than I do

>tfw Apple is the only decent brand

shame you could literally buy a decent used car for the price of a 15" macbook pro

>>66465343
W...which one?
What's wrong with it?

>>66465359
'heya'

>>66465360
haven't got any alcy

I've gone five days without wanking lads

Feel proud of myself

>>66465357
move to more civilised parts of the world

>>66465328

Just get a jacket lad or join a gym.

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>>66465357
karate

>>66465349
More like the Large Hardon Collider

>>66465321
Slam some whiskey and when you get drunk message her and say "Sorry, I was out having a drink with the boys."

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>>66465269

>>66465365
my point still stands tho, and it would have been miserable to hang out with her if her friends hated you

the feds rico'd my hazard pay

*strides towards you*

YEAH WHAT MATE, WHAT?

*parties with my peeps*

>>66465383
E series

its just fucking shit. everythings wrong with it. I'm not buying anything again until its American

>>66465392
Never stopped being a wanker though

writing a lab report and have none of the data or anything cos the people in my group are runts
haha classic nice cant wait to fail this module too haha x

Pass expired yesterday and I'm already fed up with these fucking pick three pictures of shops captchas.

Bravo Hiroshima

>>66465454
*bombs a mean right hook on the bottom edge of your jaw*
I said FUCK OFF

>>66465419
nah cba

The awkward thing is that if I did someone get on to a date it would be a fortnight away so be delaying it too long in my highly unprofessional opinion

just going to wait and try again next week llf

My 18th birthday yesterday. Off to uni next year lads. Can't wait to get so pissed haha!

https://www.shodan.io/search?query=ikettle

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>>66465405
Jacket's only gonna help up to a point lad...

>>66465504
everyone get a load of this plen lads

>>66465504
>not using legacy

>>66465486
I'm in a group with 3 Greeks who talk among themselves in whatever language, 2 Brits who don't do anything and another lad who does work but I don't think it's all that great.

We don't got shit done

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fgC-xaupU4

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what do brits call the area between the balls and butthole?

>>66465506
>>66465454
Stop it guys! We just had a group hug!!

>>66465524
how long have you been poster here?

>>66465549
the gooch

>He pays to post

will someone ever tell Milo, Sargon and Paul Joseph to get themselves real fucking lives

Jesus

>>66465549
gooch

some crackhead started swinging at me today, like as he was walking towards me he was looking directly at me and punching the air. Told him "i dont want any issue mate" and he suddenly completely calmed down, smiled and shouted really loudly "HEELLOOOOOO". I walked on and turned around to see he was still stood there, looking at me. He shouted "How aaaaaaaaare you?" after me.
Pretty weird experience honestly

>>66465582
>he posts for free

pharmaceuticals are the bomb mom beautiful

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Drinking chardonnay and watching my daughter sleep.

Pretty comfy.

on a 3 connections to 1 post ratio

>>66465584
Trump will when he loses.

He'll reveal that his presidential campaign was merely an elaborate ruse, and that he was only pretending to be retarded

making carbonara lads

>>66465549

Birmingham

>>66465584
didnt milo go cambridge tho
p sure he makes shit loads of cash too
no clue who those others are

>>66465541
really wanted to get this all done tonight though cos its reading week for me next week and i want to spend as much time away from this shit hole as possible. Looks like that might not be possible. Very sad about being stuck here cos a cunt was too lazy to send data.

>>66465524

Good on you for waiting till you turned 18 to post. Thanks for obeying the rules

>>66465486

Group work is so fucking annoying. It can turn what would be an hour or two of work into a fucking week long saga trying to get that one cunt in your group to respond

>>66465516
you have to strike while the irons hot 2bh lad

igf is calling me again

want to dump her but not sure how

>>66465584
They probably make more than you lad

>>66465642
>reading week
how incredibly plan

Running out of hard liquor lads.

See you again when the gf travels 18,000 km.

>>66465665
no one said I can't just stick it back in the microwave

>>66465549
Bristol

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>>66465638

>>66465666
press the reject button and block her

done

>>66465645
>Group work is so fucking annoying
every other group i've been in has been pure bant cos i like the people im working with. This one was shit though cos i turned up a bit late and got assigned a group.

>>66465666
summon a demon to do it for you

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Why do women think this is attractive?

did you see that ludicrous display last night?

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>tfw you match with a she-runt

>>66465536
>since 2016

>>66465566
>tfw there are realistically people who have been posting here since they were 5 years old and are just now turning 18


found 4chan when i was probably about 11-12, isn't that much of a stretch of the imagination that there were a few 5 or 6 year olds posting on it back then.

>>66465710
Yank culture infecting the world.

>>66465748
Have you ever met a 5 or 6 year old? The only way one would be on here is if someone else was showing them it.

>>66465710
the piercing?

Its a way of eluding fuckbois

>>66465747
$$ Thanks $$

right swiping everyone on tinder in the hopes i get more matches. Not working.

>>66465642
Shame man, I don't even get reading week though. Good luck getting whatever it is out of the way and then enjoying your week

We've got a 20 minute presentation due and only one person is doing the actual work, no one has a clue on any shit and they made a Whatsapp group ffs

>>66465710
because other girls do it so they want to do it

Have you passed your driving test yet, lads?

>>66465786
>fuckbois
runtess detected
hate this word so much and i dont even know why, im never called it but it just grates on me.

Just found out you can't post with Hiro in the name field lads

wish i could take benzos with no repercussions

its been almost 3 years of abuse now and my short term memory is shot to pieces

>>66465782
I think now a 5 or 6 year old being here isn't too much of a stretch, obviously a retarded thought but far more plausible than it was back when this site first started. They're growing up in a digital age

hi

>>66465839
we know, you told us 2 minutes ago

Whats the music
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPQLAcghBbs

>>66465822
>tfw 33 and can't drive

>the state of these old hags pretending to be 20 somethings on tinder
worse than the child refugees 2bh

>>66465852
Sup dawg

>>66465782
>The only way one would be on here is if someone else was showing them it.


i had a friend in high school with a sister about 10 years younger than him, she was probably about 7. he used to fuck with her a lot and showed her a lot of adult shit for laughs. he was actually a pretty demented kid 2bh, was very leery around him

but i can easily imagine some 14 year old older brother to a really young kid who thought it would be hilarious to show a young kid 4chan

>>66465822
Yes

>>66465786
I'm sure a fuckboi wouldn't care either way so this line of thinking seem irrelevant

>>66465822
prefer not to say

really don't want to go out lads
please someone stop me before I polish off half a bottle of voddy

>>66465843
I'm a volunteer in a primary school, so I know plenty of kids that age. One wouldn't be here unless someone older was showing them it, it just isn't in their interests. A 10 to 11 year old is believable, especially if they spend a lot of time alone, 5 to 6 is not.

>>66465889
Yeah that is the sort of scenario it could happen under.

>>66465822
Like 10 yrs ago

Come On lads, let's watch the BBC! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZ2ZPmEfjvU

>>66465915
nonce

>>66465911
*stops you*

>>66465915
Yeah I know, that's why I said it's still a retarded thought, but more plausible than it was before and not as huge a stretch.

>>66465915
paedo

just remembered that time when I was neet and I would wake up, eat some cinnamon cookie things my mum made in the morning and play hearthstone until she came back then pretend to do a job search

good times

>>66465954
*blocks your path*

really wish there was some way I could see this girls location
if she isn't at the club im going to I don't want to go

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kyary
>>66465108
be nice to normie twats, i miss being neet

>>66465947
>>66465965
Not a nonce. I want to be a teacher which is why I volunteer. This one was easy for me to get into because I have a family member who volunteers there as part of TA training and two cousins who attend there as pupils.

alri

>>66466008
pretty noncey if you ask me

>>66465983
She's in some lads bedroom getting pounded. Move on.

>>66466021
N-no.

>>66466018
just 'Hiro'

>>66466022
doubtful and also I only want to shag her, not in love with her or anything haha

>>66465925

runts are like humans, only humans open their eyes when they're 18

hmmm...

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>tfw too smart to be happy

>>66465673
Milo maybe ... but the other two make barely over subsistence afaik (and sargon has 2 fucking kids)

>>66466039
Yeah I tried lol, Hiroyuki and Hiroyuki Nishimura don't work either

LADS
http://www.hotukdeals.com/deals/half-price-pick-n-mix-wilkinsons-for-half-term-2532573

>>66466069
oh right lol x

squawking

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>>66465994
Present for u. I bought the magazine issue the shoot is from on moon Amazon.

Rest of the set is on hr archives if you want it.

>>66466008
>Not a nonce.
Exactly what Jimmy Savile used to say

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>>66466060
>tfw too retarded to be smart

Is it hot or disgusting if a woman's height is 152 cm?

>>66466062
>sargon has 2 kids
what

>>66466117
hot

>>66466077
>hukd
scum, the lot of them
with dellusions of grandeur

>>66466077
might have to pay the old wilko a visit haha

>>66466128
They are not his, they are both his wife's.

do americans get high off cough syrup?

What the fuck?

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Miss this show 2bqhwy

>>66466117
it's fine

just don't have kids with them because your kids will be manlets

>>66466108
>Every man who goes near children is like Jimmy Savile

How much do you reckon Hiro paid for 4chan?

>>66466139
haha what did you get banned for

>>66466185
child trafficking money

>>66466185
ten quid

>>66466150
lol is he infertile?

>>66466174
>I specifically volunteer to get near young children

>>66466206
From a previous relationship of hers I think.

doing a poo

>>66466229
wife's son

>>66465206
>>66465226
>Dell XPS
is correct

or reallymakesyou thinkpad

>>66466222
For a career tbqh.

anyone here got in trouble with the cops over drugs

>>66466252
being a nonce is not a career

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>>66466239

>>66466117
she has to have a lot of other really good qualities to make up for it, like manlets

>>66466268
Teaching is a career.

>>66466281
nonce

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>>66466161

>he's never used promethazine to potentiate codeine

>>66466294
nonce

>>66466185
his famiry's horur

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Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again

>>66466252
Only a nonce would consider such a "career".

these pills got me sweating like a nonce in a nursery

>>66466321
Did your teacher at school molest you anon?

if I stroke my cat she scratches me but if I put my face on her then she doesn't

hmm

>>66466342
your cat is a cunt

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>I prefer pasta to rice

>>66466161
ever try it?


we mostly do it when we're teenagers and can't get a hold of better drugs or weed or alcohol.

its actually really shit because you feel like garbage sometimes when you do it. makes music fucking amazing though and you do end up feeling strange bodily senstations.

its the drug of choice of 13-15 year olds

>>66466255
got caught with 0.5 of weed and they confiscated it 'unofficially'

>>66466342
>cat stands on my lap
>use her as a chin rest

love it haha x

watching ash's big bum on babestation

considering making nonce a career

>>66466339
Keep your fantasies to yourself.

>>66466360
they rolled a cheeky one after their shift

>>66466378
t. nonce

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>>66466334
CAS

ive given up on life lads

my only goal now is to become the fattest man in my state

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>rice

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tites

>>66466407
I come from a country where coke's no joke
Why'd you think the queen named her son Charlie

phone shop charging me £80 to fix my screen

>>66466436
Nonce

>>66466206
memes aside ... its his son, but the daughter is someones else's

>>66466464
>my wife's daughter

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>t. nonce

>>66466440
What phone

>>66466342

overgrown rat, stamp on that vermin, cats are scruffy filthy little bastards

Don't post anymore after this post

K

>>66466255
been caught by cops smoking quite a few times and they usually let you slide if you're respectful and not an asshole to them, they basically just warn you.

dogs are complete scum

>play civ 6
>england's theme is Scarborough Fair
>Russia's is Kalinka
>Kongo's is a song about pineapples

ah yes

Lads unironically can't stop listening to that 1 hour Lute music someone posted

What do

>Kongo is an actual civilisation
Kek

>>66466558
b l a s p h e m y

>>66466558
*waits for you at the train station for 9 years until i die*

>>66466579
close the tab

>>66466558
Rasheed

When is the day of the rope coming, lads?

>>66466597
cried in that film

>>66466378

you are a nonce in denial tbqh

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Any of you lads with intestinal issues tried the low FODMAP diet? Did it help?

>>66466598
Wow.

>>66466597
Iceland... but... you died all those years ago... how did you survive?

>>66466633
lol bender

What's the point of this thread? Why are their so few Americans posting in it? What do British people gain from talking to other British people? it's parochial and offensive to the spirit of the board.

>>66466633
I have Crohn's Disease and diet makes no difference in my life

In fact, I haven't even taken pills for over a year and nothing bad has happened.

just popped the ambien in me gob

>>66466558
every time i go for a nice walk in the country, dog walkers have their dogs running around disturbing everyone and ruining the peace

i go for walks for peace not stress

>>66466165
>>66466280
i read online that the stature of males is mostly determined from the stature of the father, not the mother

>>66466621
Nothing wrong with that
>>66466649
This is the last post you will ever direct at me, you hear?

Feeling pretty tired now, do I go to sleep or stretch it for a few hours haha

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>remembering all those times you wanked with your m8s after school

>>66466671
Nonce

>>66466671
americans do the same thing in /cum/

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I found the Icelandic poster last night

>>66466597
>>66466621
what film?

>>66466633
>fruit that rhymes with poisonberry

Don't trust that

Respect this post.

>>66466633
if you eat a vegetable of mostly meats and vegetables your digestion improves dramatically

even too many fruits like eating too many bananas for example can do my stomach in but if i stick to mainly 70-80% meat+veg i get virtually 0 gas and 0 bowel movement problems.

>>66466710
he looks asian

>start getting drunk
>watch Britney Spear music video
>watch episode of Sabrina starring Britney Spears
>watch episode of Teen Angel starring Sabrina
>watch first episode of Teen Angel
>watch first episode of Brotherly Love
>watch First episode of Boy Meets World
>watch Boy Meets World intro compilation
>tfw Uncle Dave works for the box factory

And here I am, sober(ish), cold, and nostalgic for 90s tv shows

>>66466690
no it's determined by both

>can barely play guitar
>set up 'guitar lessons' business cause need a few quid
>inexplicably garner lots of customers
>barely know anything about actually playing guitar (theoretically) but convince them all I'm some fucking highly trained qualified teacher who went to some unspecified 'London Arts School'

made shitloads of money telling complete idiots and their littel brats how to switch between G and C and occasionally D

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>dogs are complete scum

>tfw blonde and built like an icelandic twink

>>66466739
Icelandics are inbred.

>>66466672
>diet makes no difference in my life
But did you try the FODMAPS diet?
>I haven't even taken pills for over a year and nothing bad has happened.
So how did you get over it?

>>66466710
It's the normie Icelander
>>66466721
Hachi: A Dog's Tale

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Good morning.

>>66466691
>This is the last post you will ever direct at me, you hear?
No, you don't get it Iceland! Iceland, we didn't know your survived! WE DIDN'T KNOW!!!

>>66466698
no

>>66466721
not a film, it's that reddit futurama episode

I laughed at how gay it was when i first saw it

literally called my mom in the room and she said, "what's the gay shit? are you a fag now, gregory?"

and I told her no, it's just some kike bullshit and turned the television off

>>66466731
ingen bryr sig

>>66466743
no
Cheese & Onion 2bh

>>66466787
ingen bryr sig

The best diet is the one where you listen to your stomach and tongue and eat what you're craving. Your body knows what you need and what you need to eat to get that. Just follow your senses.

>>66466690
>even risking your genes with womanlet genes

genetics is one big dice roll and im sure some things are more likely to happen than others but i would never pollute my gene pool with manlet genes


my first born son is going to become an NBA superstar one day

>>66466783
Gregory come fuck your mother's pussy

>>66466801
Hey Tyrone

Once asked a Swede what language he spoke haha

ingen bryr sig

>>66466775
And you never will
*Shoots you between the eyes*
*Picks up my briefcase and leaves you to rot at the docks*

need a stacys mum gf

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>>66466800
And here I was eating salad like a chump

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>>66466666
>66666

>>66466783
maybe that futurama episode was based off a film

im too lazy to google to see if thats right but i have a feeling its probably based off another story somewhere

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tites

>>66466801
small women are so fuckable though

>>66466862
ingen bryr sig

>>66466827
Don't they speak norwegian or something like that?

just started watching Preacher, that fight on the airplane was the bollocks

>>66466743
Cheese and onion used to be in the green packet right? And blue for S+V. Or am I just imagining this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZLfasMPOU4

this videos actually really weird now I think about it

>>66466862
nonce

>>66466683
people who let their dogs off the leash are scum

same with people who let them shit all over path

>>66466860
Hello, what is her model number? I wish to submit a requisition order to the Ministry of Procreation for a copy of this unit.

>>66466763
>But did you try the FODMAPS diet?
No, I never tried any diet and my first GI doctor said it wouldn't make a difference.
>So how did you get over it?
I was in bad shape when I was first diagnosed and then during a flare up a few months later.

After being on pills for around 1.5 years, I just stopped and wanted to see what would happen. So far, so good, after maybe another 1.5 years.

I didn't do anything other than stop taking pills.

anyone who thinks dogs are scum needs literal medieval punshment

>>66466894
i said women not girls
bit of a freudian slip there lad?

>>66466873
Swedish hahahaha he told me to guess and I was like eh I dunno hahahahahahahhaha

>>66466800
*eats nothing but cheese and shreddies*

>>66466892
Too much time behind bars does strange things to anyone's head.

>>66466862
(posts out of character: i actually agree, mini girls are so qt)


ahem.. hell naw nigga i aint breedin with that shit

>>66466929
I bet that must have pissed him right off

dogs kill children

>>66466935
Rasheed

>mind is awake but eyes are tired
wanna keep posting with the lads hut struggling desu

>>66466931
don't be a child

you have to really THINK

you have to meditate in a state of pure zen to figure out what you need

Educated
With money
He's well-dressed
Not funny
And not much to say in most conversations
But he'll foot the bill in all situations
'Cause he pays for everything

Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money
Boys will laugh at girls when they're not funny

Paper
Or plastic
Don't matter
She'll have it
Vacations and shopping sprees
These are a few of her favorite things
She'll get what she wants if she's willing to please
His type of girl always comes with a fee
Hey now, there's nothing for free

Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money
Boys will laugh at girls when they're not funny
And these girls like these boys, like these boys like these girls
The girls with the bodies like boys with Ferraris
Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money

Let's go!

Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money
Boys will laugh at girls when they're not funny
And these girls like these boys, like these boys like these girls
The girls with the bodies like boys with Ferraris
Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money

All of these boys, and all of these girls
Losing their souls in a material world
All of these boys, and all of these girls
Losing their souls in a material world
All of these boys, and all of these girls
Losing their souls in a material world
All of these boys, and all of these girls
Losing their souls in a material world

SERIOUSLY considering becoming a priest. Seems like an easy, wellbeing fulfilling way of life.

>>66466597
i looked that up

why the fuck was he stabbed?

>>66466984
nonce

>>66466984
Nonce detected

>>66466984
Maybe you'll find God

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Jack Whitehall is shagging this.

>>66466973
rasheed

this is fucking gay going to go outside and smoke cigarettes

>>66466991
what are you on about

>>66466984
thailad on holiday in ireland

>>66466991
He was Memeing to the Extreme, that why he had to get Double Teamed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2rNlXUuT5M

Made the roasted pumpkin seeds too spicy lads

got a gf today lads

>>66467018
where are you? x

>>66467040
nonce

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watching Atheism Is Unstoppable 2bh

make of that what you will

>>66467040
How old?

>>66466973
what a fucking gay song and gay band that is. end yourself

>>66467040
fuck off 'ndon

>>66467047
hmm
>>66467054
19 same age as me
>>66467071
no

business idea: we make a general called brit but only 50% of the posters be british

>>66467009
I've already found god

The Amazing Atheist is the greatest philosopher-laureate of our generation.

Rosamund pike

>>66466918
>No, I never tried any diet and my first GI doctor said it wouldn't make a difference.


a lot of medical professionals get shockingly little nutritional training, even some gut doctors might be out of the loop. doctors aren't always 100% right, theres a good percentage of doctors that are actually lazy fucks.


anecdotally a lot of people with really bad bowel diseases who fiddle around with their diets tend to see at least a little improvement if not dramatic improvement, have heard a lot of people alleviate chrohns symptoms with dietary changes too. i don't know much about crohns and know that it is pretty complicated to improve but its at least worth playing with your diet even if some guy is like "Lol nah i dont think itll make a difference bro youre fucked i guess *shrugs shoulders and counts money*"

business idea: we make London the capital of Britain and then make only 50% of the inhabitants British

>>66466991
The original dog "Malchik" ended up in some confrontation with another dog owner who was a bit mental and decided to stab him

Anyone have that vocaroo of somebody singing like Tim lads?

>>66467092
no stefan molyneux is

fuck off and die

>>66467092
>>66467132
>Not Sargon of Akkad

>>66467111
ah the famous 4chan school of medicine. well worth listening to

>>66467020
said when he was found dead he'd been stabbed with skewers in the stomach by the yakuza

getting my daily dose of nigger and jew lads

>>66467111
I don't doubt that, and the other issue is many doctors would be opposed to medical marijuana even though it can help a lot of people...granted, I have never tried it.

But that is just my experience with Crohn's and diet (or lack of it).
I have read plenty of stories about people who try every diet possible and have no luck whatsoever.

>>66467164
I'm actually an orthodontist, but only part-time

>>66467084
It's the beginning of foreign hour

>66467177
Edgy

>>66467144
What if we fused the Amazing Atheist and Sargon of Akkad into the Amazing Atheist of Akkad?

>>66467064
you're gay

>>66467207
wow

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>I volunteer as a teacher

>>66467164
yeah but what if it helps and hes never even tried it?

crohns can be cause by a lot of factors, diet might be one of them. why not play with the variables and experiment with things in life?

2
reddit

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>>66467194
Aye, can you use Bankai?

>>66467216
erm could we not be so homophobic m8, eh?

>>66467233
Why do you look so ugly?

>>66467246
ooga booga potato fooda

fucking hell im depressed