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/brit/

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Thread replies: 336
Thread images: 46

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korean pop edition
>>
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/balt/
>>
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I'm a pretty little girl sub-edition
>>
>>65991593
what did he mean by this?
>>
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>trump won't win because the BBC told me so
>>
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check your privilages lads
>>
>>65991593
Mashallah what a handsome British boy you are!
>>
just copped this
>>
Feel sick right now lads.

>stay at a friends house last night (girl)
>wake up about an hour ago
>her armpit was right by my face
>stank of B.O.
>her feet were all clammy and whenever I moved the duvet I got a whiff of warm cheese
>faint smell of fish and could see loads of pubes poking out her underwear

She was a tier-1 runt.
>>
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Bang-Fucking-On
>>
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>>65991638
honestly womyn stink like shit.

whenever I shag one it's literally the only thing I can smell on my hand for the day even if I shower or whatever.

fucking hate it.
>>
OI OI!!!

http://www.strawpoll.me/11407759

http://www.strawpoll.me/11407759
>>
>>65991653
name one good thing obama has done
>>
>>65991655
me building a super computer
>>
Lads I'm worried that I might have a complete lack of empathy for people

How do I tell?
>>
>>65991687
hope
>>
>>65991687
Deport more illegal immigrants than any president prior
>>
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We are people just like you!
>>
there is no hope for america
prove me wrong protip its impossible
>>
>>65991634
t-this is ironic right?
>>
>>65991653
completely different economic climate + Obama's "hope" has lead absolutely nowhere
>>
>>65991701
are you male?
>>
>>>65991526

Yeah, blocked her on everything after she told me, then she sent me a text saying 'don't you dare tell anyone why we are distancing ourselves from each other' because she's blatantly embarrassed by her actions. Told her to fuck off out of my life and that I wanted nothing to do with her and she was like 'at least we both hate each other now :)'

ah yes, hate me because I'm angered that you're a whore, impressive logic. Wish she would just top herself instead of begging for attention. Can't believe I wasted so much time on a chink, she keeps trying to pretend she's some sort of femme fatale despite being a midget who cries constantly, funny knowing that the only people giving her attention are SEA's, low tier blacks and ultra beta white lads though
>>
>>65991701
Kill someone and see how you feel afterwards
>>
>>65991718
50% of all races are scum tbqh
>>
>>65991728
Yes
>>
>>65991655
>women in stem.jpg

Like what even is that fucking photo, someone should've turned the soldering iron on
>>
>>65991726
Lad... The whole "HOPE" deal... Never had to do with economics...

Take one guess what it truly meant
>>
>>65991716
ahhh yes
http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2015/feb/12/obama-amnesty-creates-loophole-for-illegal-immigra/
http://www.nationalreview.com/article/431676/obama-administration-enabling-noncitizen-voting
http://www.snopes.com/obama-non-citizens-vote/
http://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2016/02/surprise-obama-is-trying-to-let-non-citizens-vote-in-the-november-election/
http://immigrationreform.com/2016/02/24/federal-court-case-halts-obama-administrations-policy-of-allowing-illegals-to-vote-for-now/
http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/239244-steve-king-obama-importing-millions-of-illegal-immigrants-to-boost
>>
>>65991701
Imagine murdering your mother. Not just like a sneaky stab but actually looking her in the eyes and stabbing her and watching her betrayed look as the life drains from her eyes.
>>
>>65991738
t. Tyrone Hernandez
>>
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who here /cornerstoneofkawaii/?
>>
>>65991744
well that explains everything
>>
>>65991763
I've already had those thoughts m8, same with my dad too
>>
wish one of those clowns would show up near me i'd knock fuck out of them
>>
>>65991764
They are though. Do you really think bubba ever had the chance to be a lawyer or doctor or do anything besides drink and gamble his way into debt?
>>
Feel hungry
>>
>>65991766
wow
>>
>>65991776
apparently some little melt in a neighbourhood over from me was doing it on saturday

would have unironically flattened him
>>
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>>65991776
LOVING the last 4 numbers of your post
>>
>>65991774
Yeah you're probably fucked up m8
If it makes you feel better it doesn't mean you don't have feelings it just means you will never feel a connection to someone and you'll probably go insane because of it.
>>
>>65991766
what
>>
>>65991792
50% of all whites are not rednecks

Vast majority of whites are middle class people whose children go on to lead successful and productive lives

The same cannot be said for other races except East Asians
>>
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reminder
>>
feel thirsty

*sips my drink*

no longer feel thirsty
>>
>>65991834
>tfw no mashumaro no on'nanoko gf
>>
I could literally beat any here in a fight and I wouldn't just win I would win handily

I could easily fuck each and every one of you pathetic sacks of shit up beyond all recognition

I would have to exercise restraint to not kill you all that's how bad the beating would be

You would literally be in the hospital sucking your meals through a straw and shitting and pissing in a diaper for at least 6 months before you could even muster the strength to leave your hospital bed

Fuck you all
>>
>>65991763
going to get hatted but I often wish I had a justified reason to kill someone

Just scared of getting caught
>>
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>>65991880
>>
wouldn't mind fucking dropping that hot mouthed yank
>>
alrighty, time to cook up some eggos and ham on toasterino my lads
>>
>>65991902
Try and I'll have you on the ground before you could even flap your fat bogan lips
>>
>>65991884
you belong in a straight jacket you runt.
>>
>>65991933
yea well i'll show you fucking fat bogan lips

*drops to my knees and sucks your willy*
>>
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Me and the husbando
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>>65991955
>Bogan blowies
>>
>>65991955
Ooo that feels amazing

*willy begins to tingle and becomes fully engorged*
*strokes your hair*

Just like that
>>
have lived in this new suburb for 2 months and have seen 5 white women with brown babies and no father in sight
never saw this in my old suburb
>>
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>>65991859
morning
>>
>>65991970
Thanks. Now I gotta go watch more Jerry Springer/Maury/Montell not the father compilations.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0li-wH3W5Yo
>>
we both know we ain't kids no more
>>
>>65991884
I had a dream I killed someone in a rage and felt awful until I woke up realized it wasn't real.
Kind of nice to know I'm not a psychopath desu
>>
Marxian ideas will never stop being relevant
>>
>>65992042
Cut your bloody hair Jordan
>>
I should go on Jeremy Kyle
>>
When a woman gets a vibrator it's seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when a guy orders a 240v Fuckmaster Pro 5000 blow up latex doll with 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticised anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, he's called a pervert?
>>
>>65992059
I remember when I was bored during my third year of uni (since most of my mates had buggered off to do industry years) so rather than go out drinking I'd just buy sex toys off the web and sit in my room masturbating with stuff

very productive
>>
>>65992039
Think I might honestly have something wrong with me

Always have dreams like that too. I also find it very easy to social climb, which is handy. Never ever had a person I couldn't make like me

There's either something wrong or I'm just a general dickhead
>>
>>65992042
ah yes, Amir is behaving irrationally and overemotionally
almost like an actual woman hahaha
>>
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the gf prepping my favourite pizza x
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>>65992046
go suck off a chav
>>
>>65992089
Is buying a fleshlight worth it?
>>
>>65991999
*sucks deeper and deeper, fondling your balls*

hahaha you fucking cunt i'm fucken showing you good
>>
>>65992059
>6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticised anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system

Just overdrawn on both accounts lad.
>>
>>65992042
you sound fucked.
>>
>>65992104
the mess she's made compared to her colleagues

fucking amateur
>>
pound-euro parity by the end of the year lads
>>
>>65992109
no, you have to clean them a lot

it's a lot more fun anyway to make yourself cum via purely prostate stimulation
>>
>>65992138
but Amir, you are a bastard
>>
>>65992110
*willy begins to twitch involuntarily*
*breathing gets deeper and more problunced*
*a sudden gasp escapes my lips*

Something's about to drop haha
>>
>>65991587
Post more please.
>>
i'm an important person, i mix in circles above your wildest dreams

if any of you twats that post here dared to even so much as look at me i could have you serving a 15 year prison sentence by the weekend
>>
>>65992042
Ahaha you showed him
>>
>>65992109
If you don't mind spending the cash on cleaning products and PROPER lube, yes.

You can go through a bottle of common lube in a week for first timers and unless you clean it RIGHT AFTER (dont let it sit with your cum inside like a fucking mong) it'll slowly start to break apart at their weak points.

Unless you have an above average willie, be sure and get one with a small cavity, or else you'll be sticking your dick in a fake pussy that's been BLACKED.
>>
>>65992155
this

i remember the first time i did, it felt amazing and much stronger that a regular orgasm, even though it didn't feel like i'd actually cum
>>
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>>65992177
*suddenly gets up and punches your face in*
told you i'd fucking get you, you fucking yank

*takes a pube off my lip and throws it at you*

here's your receipt
>>
>>65992216
Only way to go desu la.

Whenever I have a wank I don't even need to go full on backdoor beauty with my shit now. My body knows when it's time to orgasm and all I have to do is clinch some muscles properly at the right time and viola. Feels like shooting blanks. Until you open your eyes and look down.
>>
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Scotcucks blown out by the Chinese
>>
>>65992155
>>65992216
Not into stuff up the bum

Tried a finger before and even a carrot and did nothing for me

Just made me feel like I had to do a poo
>>
>>65992200
can we be friends? i would like a friendly friend.
>>
>>65992138
Then do something about it you bastard
>>
just realised i hate base-10 lads
>>
>>65992236
ahaha noice, the old sucky willy punchy face trick, CLASSIC
>>
>>65992255
that's the initial feeling you get, it takes probably 5-10 goes before you start to get pleasure from it

it won't happen instantly, most people give up after the first time
>>
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>>65991955
>>65991999
>>65992110
>>65992177
>>65992236
>>
>>65992255
you just have to find the right spot

it can be tricky, but once you find it it's great
>>
>>65992262
Dad does the same creepy shit m8.. Like this crazy fuck JUST KNOWS when I'm having a wank, even going commando with the headphones and tv on low in the background.

Swear he sucked dicks in 'nam for easy missions
>>
>>65992236
*falls to the ground*
*willy begins to shrink as the pain begins to takeover*
*look around to try to regain my bearings*

Haha you sure got me good there lad
>>
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Absolute monarchy NOW
>>
>pizza tracker goes from order to prep to baking
>check it just now
>reversed back to 'order'

ahh yes very good
>>
oi join my meme game you shits

http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=421
>>
>>65992359
stop talking about it and do it you fucking paki bastard
>>
>want to try winning the heart of my oneitis
>haven't seen her in months
>people tell me it's impossible
>but we were friends once and she's the only thing that makes me feel truly happy

Is the pursuit of happiness not my right? I want her so bad lads
>>
One of my gf's orbiters actually proposed to her over the phone

She told him to fuck off, I'm howling
>>
Pakipoo getting btfo by his dad is actually hilarious
>>
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not gonna lie
i have seen more nonwhite 'british' youtubers than white ones

sad really
>>
>>65992359
>Told him I didn't have any and that he didn't seem too interested in that back when I was in high school or primary school

Ah yes, I'm sure you would have appreciated your dad intervening in your high school social life so you could make some friends
>>
>>65992429
Haha post the convos lad go on haha
>>
>>65992429
iktf lol
one of my gfs bulls told her to "ditch that loser" last week but she said no
she knows shes got a keeper with me, loyal girl
>>
>>65992394
i've felt the same, what you have is an obsession

best thing to do is get over it, easiest way is to develop another obsession for someone completely unattainable e.g. online personality or celebrity
>>
Bought 20 Galaxy Note 6's two weeks ago and now they're worth twice the price

Lmao

I am a literal genius
>>
>>65992435
I'm surprised he hasn't angrily raped the little bitch
>>
>>65992154
WAKE ME UP
>>
>>65992429
why are you howling, are you a furry?
>>
>>65992362
t. subservient rodent
>>
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How is he so fucking built?
>>
>>65992492
you sound like such a baby
your complaints are always so fucking minuscule but you blow them out of proportion
>>
http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=421

THREE more spots left you cunts
>>
>>65992359
>I'm probably literally going to kill my dad
do it you cunt

>Will I stab him
wouldn't that require upper body strength?

>will I douse him in gasoline and then set him alight?
ah yes, the old ISIS approach
very muslim, that.

>that circled back to him saying I look like a gypsy and that I smell
Have you ever thought that he might be right?
>>
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>>65991655
>>
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>>65992513
all the dentist bashing
>>
>>65992513
Button on those trousers is holding on for dear life.
>>
>>65992547
quality pic related

feel like it needs some dhl tho
>>
>>65992537
joined ;)
>>
>>65992492
Dads aren't supposed to do that ffs you fairy
>>
>>65992578
i'd have to make a whole new pic, it wouldn't fit anywhere

if you have an idea i might make it later
>>
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>>65991664
>>65991638
Women are revolting, it's a proven fact
>>
>>65992492
You are a literal child that does not understand human interaction

>Literally never asked me how my day was or how I was feeling

Yes because dads need to act like they do in American family movies, always asking children how their day was and praising them.

He could probably sense you were fucked socially and decided not to bring it up because you would've sperged out about it. What could he even do to make you feel better?
>>
>>65992600
>He doesn't like girl stink
>>
>>65992602
>words are more painful than physical harm
wish I could beat you to a pulp just so you'd realise how wrong you are
>>
Imagine if people didn't have to sleep.
>>
>>65992620
>falling for the vaginal jew
>>
>organise date for tomorrow evening a while ago
>come down with flu yesterday

fuck sakes
>>
>>65992620
Girls who have female stenches are fine, it's kinda lovely in certain situations t.bh.

But when you've got some chubby slut who looks like about 200lbs of chewed bubblegum and smells like she hasn't been able to wash her backside in years... Jog on.
>>
>>65992628
you dont. once you realise that your mind opens so wide
>>
>>65992627
almost crying at this

considering the flight to Ireland to buy you a pint
>>
>>65992602
>What do they do?
How do you not understand that there isn't some set role fathers/ sons occupy, he isn't supposed to "do" anything.
>>
>giving polearunt (You)s

hmmmmm
>>
>>65992602
They provide for the family and give you advice on how to improve yourself and your life, and motivate you to succeed
>>
>>65992594
not worth the hassle but quality OC tho

gj /brit/man
>>
he really is a lost cause isn't he. utter abortion of a human.
>>
join the words that follow room lads
>>
>>65992602
>Words are more painful then physical harm
then why do you keep coming back here? we insult you more than anywhere else. It's almost like you want attention.

>He isn't right
yeah he is

>It's my hair, I can keep it however I want
doesn't stop you looking and smelling like an absolute mong
>>
>>65992728
thanks for the link retard
>>
>>65992750
see
>>65992537
>>
>>65992600
showering every day is by no means necessary and actually detrimental to your skin
>>
>>65992746
Talking to people at school for 13 consecutive years?
>>
>>65992778
spotted the putrid roastie
>>
http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=421

haha look I posted it again bloody hell
>>
>>65992796
ever wonder why women have nicer skin than men? that's why
>>
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>>65992828
>ever wonder why women have nicer skin than men

1: makeup
2: they don't
>>
>>65992823
>going to shower now
>because I enjoy it

alri Amir, how was your day?
>I had THE best shower
literally howling
>>
>>65992828
or because women use a fuck load more skin creams than men?

90% of men have a shower, dry off and leave it at that. girls lather themselves in creams and shit, and most guys actually have better skin than girls due to no make up destruction
>>
>>65992853
didn't say softer, i said nicer

also, kill yourself degenerate
>>
>>65992853
>trans here
>WE
>>
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>>65992838
>>
>>65992856
women are disgusting whores desu

also this>>65992878
>>
>>65992856
>this pic

No more evidence is required. Women are natural conman and should not be trusted.
>>
>>65992746
>Sounds like you had a bad father too
m8 I have a great dad, I just don't see him as just a paternal figure but as a friend.

A mong like you doesn't understand that a "father" doesn't have to adopt some stupid persona that treats you like an inferior
>>
abs are genuinely hurting from laughing at this words that follow game
>>
>>65992856
I had nicer skin than my ex, she always used to get pissed off about it

Mental though, if you saw her with all her makeup she looked pretty fit, once it was off she had scars and spots on her face, she looked about 12 and generally horrid really
>>
>>65992600
I'm NEET and might go two weeks without showeing sometimes
>>
>>65993003
how

I get itchy and slathered in my own grease within 3 days
>>
>>65992939
Good lad

My mother is the all loving one, my father and I don't need to harp on about gay shite like that because we already know it, problem with poleaboo is he wants his dad to treat him like a daughter
>>
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Ah yes, very impressive

http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=421
>>
>>65992963
it's not that funny jesus christ
>>
>>65993031
itchy and slathered in your own grease? that's fucking weird

I just might smell a bit of BO, don't start getting erratic itches and body becoming greasy lmao
>>
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>>65993031
the first 3 days are the worst. it takes a bit of time to get used to your own stench. after a week it's smooth sailing. as you long as you wipe your bum good you can go without showering for months
>>
>>65993100
i laugh easily but its stabilised now
>>
>>65993100
let him be lad
he doesnt get much human contact
>>
Cop or not?
>>
>>65993177
cop on more like m8
>>
>>65993177
You'd look like you're about to go watch the footy
>>
>>65993177
Wearing a sweater from ami right now lad, very comfortable

go for it
>>
>>65993244
>sweater
FOY
>>
>>65993207
that isn't actually me
>>
>>65993244
yeah I have a navy ami knit, is v. nice.
>>
>>65993261
LEAVE me alone

If I said jumper people might have mistaken it for a hoodie type jumper
>>
>>65993286
FOY
>>
>>65993286
FOY
>>
looks like words that follow killed this thread haha wew
>>
>>65991593
Le pretend I'm not balding haircut
>>
just imagine being poleaboo
>>
cold out
>>
>>65993328
>>65993319
You're all a bunch of BASTARDS

*storms off*
>>
I'd have booted 'bena out if I was his dad tbqh
>>
janny: several thousands
poleaboo: 0
>>
Imagine being polish lads, just IMAGINE

Frightening.
>>
>>65993444
I'd rather be French
>>
SO I NEVER GONNA DANCE AGAIN, GUILTY FEED HAVE GOT NO RHYTHM, THOUGH IT'S EASY TO PRETEND I KNOW YOUR NOT A FOOOOL SHOULD'VE KNOWN BETTER THAN TO CHEAT A FRIEND AND WASTE A CHANCE THAT I'VE BEEN GIVEN
SO I NEVER GONNA DANCE AGAIN THE WAY I DANCED WITH YOUUUU
>>
Alright Louie? Come out and everything's fine, don't come, and it's gonna be hell, understood? it's your choice. What you wanna do? You want to come now and everything will be fine? Or do you wanna stay here and it's gonna be hell? Cause that's what it's gonna be. because you're not gonna have any sweet foods or anything like that, no drink, everything like that is just gonna go into the garage So you gonna have to go get it, there will be no internet from 10 in the evening to about 8 in the morning, so you're not gonna be able to have any internet, also I'm gonna tell plusnet to disable your laptop. That would be good wouldn't it Louie? It'd be great. Also no Overwatch game, you can forget that, right. Infact I just want you to stop being on the laptop at all, I want you to do something else isntead. So why don't you try to find a new hobby, something which is not online, yeah? Something like stamp collecting or even reading a book, yeah? You need to do something which is away from being infront of the computer screen or you will just become obsessed, to a point where it's affecting your life, yeah? This has affected your life Louie, you know. This is not how you should be, Louie. This is just some person who you've become. This is not good. It's bad for you. You gotta get out of this Louie. This is really, really, really, really bad, yeah? this is really bad, yeah? All you're doing is just waiting for me to go away, cause that's what you've learned to do. Is that what your life is? All the people of your age, they're all going out doing other stuff. What you're doing Louie is walking around in your smelly bedroom, playing computergames in your piyamas. What a life. Is that your life?? Is that your life choice? is it? You can't even talk, can yer? This is what you've become.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1tYg62aWaSD
>>
http://www.cbr.com/united-nations-to-name-wonder-woman-honorary-ambassador/

ahhh, the UN
>>
Anyone aware of any way to make your poos less sloppy? About 6 months ago I started noticing that my poos were much bigger and sloppier, and I'd always have to use the toilet brush to wipe skid marks from the toilet after pooing. Nothing has really changed in my diet. I just want to be more of a clean and polite pooer desu.
>>
>>65993368
think we should stop being mean to him desu
>>
>>65993517
more fibre, eat more beans
>>
why is kevin bacon so popular in the UK? isn't bacon haram?
>>
>>65993517
hire me to clean your arsehole with my tongue
>>
>>65993548
I thought I already had a pretty high-fibre diet desu :S

>>65993628
That would be a VERY unpleasant task because the hairs around my arsehole occasionally retain some of the poo that exits my anus during a particularly sloppy poo.
>>
*joins words that follow*
*wins 3 times in a row*
*leaves*
heh nothing personnel kids...
>>
bit slow today

where is everyone
>>
>>65993678
did everyone leave after I did?
>>
>>>/b/707420153

really made me go hmmmmm
>>
playing some cheeky destiny
>>
>>65993489
YOUVE GO FERAL LOUIE
>>
>>65993720
fucking hell i was eating
>>
>>65993678
>personnel
pleb
>>
>>65993551
he really isn't, literally no idea why EE thought he would be a decent face for their advertising campaigns. Truly bizarre.

I'd chin the cunt if I saw him on the street.
>>
>>65993720
christ dude, im havign breakfast
>>
>>65993869
>no idea why EE thought he would be a decent face for their advertising campaigns
are you 12? have you never heard of "six degrees of Bacon"? EEs motto is about being always connected, Kevin Bacon makes complete sense
>>
>>65993921
No I haven't heard of that, and basing a multi-year million pound campaign around such a shitty gimmick is not a sound idea.
>>
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Have you ever been to Preston, lads? It is the rising bull of the north.
>>
absolutely freezing lads

please send help
>>
http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=421

http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=421

get in here
>>
Picked up a 2 litre of Pepsi Max from tesco on the way home lads, gonna drink it all today
>>
*turns the temperature controlling device for all of Earf down 5 degree centigrade*
>>
>>65993985
just let it die
>>
>>65994009
Weirdly enough it just started to get colder out here
>>
>>65993983
Furthest north I ever got was Nottingham. That "castle" was a major disappointment lads, just had to point that one out. Really killed the subversiveness from growing up watching Robin Hood flicks.
>>
>>65993984
*turns on the heat with my phone*
>>
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OI LADS!!!

HOW ABOUT SOME QUINTESSENTIAL BRITISH BEAVER?????????????/
>>
>>65994128
YOWZA!
>>
>>65994128
God I bet that is one hairy fluffy minge hiding inside that masterpiece.
>>
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https://twitter.com/lachlan/status/785595392385687552
>>
>>65994128
is that Cardiff?
>>
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heh, nice try kiddos
>>
>>65994199
oh man one can only hope.
>>
>>65994231
Birmingham
>>
Legit have mild autism

VERY enraged
>>
>>65994232
jesus step it up kentlad
>>
>>65991687
Obamacare
>>
>>65994232
>having me muted

absolute autism
>>
got a nice fresh monkfish fillet, how should I cook it lads?
>>
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Last few days I felt like killing myself and now I'm feeling great.

Don't know what's wrong with me 2bh, I'm all messed up but who cares, I'm happy right now.
>>
>>65994128
>Quintessentially British
>No hijab
>>
on my way home now from dublin
>>
>>65994320
Get ready for when your depression hits again lad. I suggest you enjoy this time.
>>
>>65994320
bipolar
>>
>>65994341

1st time this week?
>>
>>65994317
fuck off murderer
>>
>>65994317
apply heat to it
>>
on moi way howme na from dablin
>>
>>65994367
Fuck it, I'm feeling fine. Live for the now, you know?

>>65994369
Nah m8 bipolar is apparently when it lasts for weeks. Mine only lasts a few days.
>>
>>65994000
Guarantee you're a fatty
>>
>>65994317
with some lemon and thyme
>>
Does fasting make you feel good? I've been eating about 500 calories a day for the last four days and ow I don't feel hungry at all and actually feel pretty decent.
>>
>>65994416
>Pepsi Max
>fatty

lol
>>
>>65994430
why not just use lemon thyme in that case
>>
What should I buy on eBay?
>>
used to think i was lactose intolerant but i've had about 6 glasses of chocolate milk and 4 cheese sandwiches today and havent farted any more than usual
>>
>>65994495
Enjoy the diarrhoea
>>
>>65994476
buy janny's dad some good captions
>>
>>65994446
>Having no self control and consuming something as soon as you buy it

Waddle on
>>
>>65994435
Literally doing the same as we speak lad. I'm about to eat my first 800cal square meal in 4 days.

It's the shock your body goes through that makes people say fuck it and continue eating, but once you get through those first few days you should be ok, so long as you get plenty of hydration and vitamins.

You know you're full of shit when you stop eating for 4 days and you're still shitting 2-3 times a day...

I swear on a regular basis I must have 40lbs worth of shit in me.
>>
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>>65994524
>Buy drink
>Don't drink it
>>
>>65994527
Kek

I never shit even when I'm eating, I regularly go over four days without needing to.
>>
Wish Andrew Mitchell would fuck off, posh cunt is gonna end up talking us into a war with Russia
>>
>>65994557
t. sugar puff teeth
>>
>>65994598
Its about time Russia was put in its place
>>
>>65994435
I did this but 1000 calories a day and felt really good.

Doubt you're getting everything you need from 500 kcal a day though, it's a struggle doing that with 1000 kcal to play with.
>>
Hi
>>
>>65994598
Why don't you fuck off, you smelly, rotten paki?
>>
>>65994671
Yeah, I might increase it a bit. Starting to feel a bit shaky and low energy. Still happy though, which is nice.
>>
hello haha
>>
>>65994731
Fuck off.
>>
Business ideas for this week: Buy some more of the ol' boudoir, buy some more alcohol, buy some new clothes and hopefully shag one of the tinder slags I've been pursuing
>>
might just wallow in despair
>>
>>65994671
I'm on DNP, got down to 144.25lbs
>>
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wtf i hate the Tories now
>>
>>65994686
You're running on fumes at this point. You need to up your intake and slightly increase your physical activity. Avoid sugars and other additives.

You feel good because your body is basically on low power, not needing to digest anything, more energy is focused on other parts of your body, parts you normally don't get all the energy for.
>>
>Australia is a normie/chad country
>3rd biggest posters on /int/
>they openly discuss 4chan in real life

it just doesn't add up lads
>>
Flatmate is incapable of opening the front door, stupid cunt stands there jiggling his key around for 5 minutes and shaking the door everytime he comes in or goes
>>
Poleaboo text adventure, you need python to play it

https://gitlab.com/ASCVGH/TheLegendOfPoleaboo
>>
>>65994783
that's the pleb mp
>>
>>65994800
I don't discuss it in real life tbf hahaha
>>
>>65994783
This is in the same day a bbc journalist called the tories Nazis http://order-order.com/2016/10/11/bbc-journalist-calls-government-new-nazis/

Some people are just idiots who call anything they don't like muh fascists or muh Nazis
>>
Any tips on becoming funnier lads?

Feel like I'm lacking in the humour department.
>>
>>65994809
i constantly check that i've locked the door desu
>>
Is Poleaboo dead yet?
>>
>>65994795
Yeah now that I'm sitting here I think I do need something to eat.

I had a coffee earlier so I'm caffeine rushing as well.
>>
>Brexit was a good idea
>>
>>65994860
Alcohol.

>tfw I can be quite funny but it's in a negative, critical sort of way so people think I'm a bit of a dickhead

They're right too.
>>
>>65994849
Orwell himself wrote that the term "fascist" and "nazis" lost all meaning in the late 1930s.
>>65994920
don't worry, the pound will jump up again
>>
>>65994920
Lower pound value is exactly what we need right now.
>>
Reminder that a kebab is literally the shittest post night out takeaway and pizza is the gold standard
>>
>>65994971
one pepperunti pizza thanks
>>
>>65994920
the pound is still an attractive currency to buy government bonds and English property with
>>
>>65994963
Hmm yes higher prices on most electronics, food, cars, petrol etc. Is a great thing isnt it
>>
>>65994920
you want a stronger pound?
*pounds you with all my might*
np kid
>>
>>65995006
good, less money to the chinese
>>
>>65994971
That's not a parmo or cheesy chips
>>
>>65994971
I just get a setmeal for 2 whenever I'm drunk and hungry
>>
can't stand me now
can't stand me now
>>
>>65995032
Only like 5% of our imports are from China
>>
>>65994873
Same

I'll be all the way up the stairs and think if I've made sure I locked the back door, even though that's the last thing I just did
>>
will heem literally every scotcuck in this thread
>>
>>65994897
>caffeine

No wonder you've got a spurt of energy all of a sudden, your body isn't having to metabolize the caffeine through all the other nutrients your body would normally have stored, so it's basically a straight shot to your CNS for you right now.

Don't be surprised if in an hour or so you suddenly crash and get grouchy as fuck.
>>
>>65995138
>Don't be surprised if in an hour or so you suddenly crash and get grouchy as fuck.

i do dare say that a cup of coffee doesn't come with much of a come down

t. drinks 4 double espressos between 10am and 1pm daily
>>
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that first sip of the day
>>
>>65994811
got a python right here
*slaps nob onto desk*
>>
>>65995172
that first repost of the day
>>
>>65995169
Oh I know, but when you're running on fumes and are lacking proper nutrients, every little drop of something entering your body has much more effect than normally.

Just like if say you decide to drink on an empty stomach. You know that shit is hitting you a lot faster.
>>
>>65995136
>implying you couldn't heem the scotcucks that aren't in this thread
>>
>>65995172
waster
>>
>>65995172
Tempted to find where you live and knock some sense into you

utter runt
>>
>>65995210
what do you mean
>>
>>65995172
energy drinks are for the degenerate
>>
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>I drink orange juice with bits in
>>
>>65995214
I actually did that the other day with whisky and got fucking wasted in just a few minutes.
>>
>>65995283
>he drinks pulpless orange juice

utter runt tier preference
>>
everyone at work think I'm a weirdo lads

they may be right
>>
>>65995333
They don't think of it
>>
>>65995214
i eat once a day and live off cigs and coffee between 9-5 and beer from 5-eating time

never feel shabby t bh

>>65995296
shouldn't happen unless it was mixed, 40% conc alcohol is too strong for the stomach to absorb quickly and mostly spends it's time sat on your gut lining rotting it

alcohol absorption on an empty stomach is near enough 100% up until ~15% abv then drops off rapidly
>>
Just remembered when my cousin got his cock out at the table at a family meal when we were both about 8

still bully him for it, absolute freak
>>
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>I drink juice at all
>>
Just a €5 wage increase waheeeeey
>>
>>65995333
same haha

>anon why don't you ever come out with us
>anon why don't you have a girlfriend are you gay
>>
>>65995296
>>65995341
that should say:
>alcohol absorption on an empty stomach is near enough 100% within 30 minutes
>>
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>work
>>
>>65995384
not even

https://twitter.com/rtenews/status/785826995665895425
>>
Ah yes I remember the uni days where I'd buy a big bottle of lambs and drink some it and wake up on the floor/bed/shower/flatmate's bed
>>
>>65995353
>monopoly money
>>
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>>65995353
Heh, dont care, good ol' Gideon chucked us an extra 50p an hour
>>
>>65995450
This just triggered a memory of mine

First time I slept over at my ex gfs house, I somehow woke up in her sisters bed (she wasn't there), shat myself and had to sneak out
>>
bored out of my BLOODY MIND

off work with a broken arm and i've got fuck all to do, just been wanking every day
>>
>>65995478
pmsl
>>
>>65995463
What's the British minimum wage? €9.15 over here, pretty dece

>>65995452
that'd be the pound nowadays desu
>>
>>65995502
how did you break your arm haha
>>
>>65995478
Should have tried to sneak the bedsheets into the washing machine and have someone try to grab them until they flew out of your hands and everyone gets liquid shit over them
>>
>>65995463
>>65995511
just googled it

equivalent to €7.45 and that's only if you're over 21, otherwise it's €5.90

when did it get so tragically bad?
>>
new

>>65995568
>>65995568
>>
>>65995518
got hit by a car haha

think the driver was just bantering me
>>
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>>65995573
thatcher happened
>>
>>65995592
hahaha good banter
>>
>>65995172
Get a proper drink cunt, make a brew or fuck off to America.
Thread posts: 336
Thread images: 46


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