cuck edition
>>65904322
>19 seconds
not bad not bad at all
Not a fan of the earth's rotation on it's axis. Before the sun in my windows used to pass across my floor, now it is going across the bottom of my couch and on my legs. Soon it'll be on my torso and face.
Gonna have to rotate my entire living room so I face away from the window
how can Drake be such a melt yet so cool at the same time
mental
https://youtu.be/RubBzkZzpUA?list=PL0-0_2HzQG_GRVYKsR6wIvttRoHeJg5lp
reckon a LOT more people would be anti-abortion if they saw what late-term-abortions actually look like
been a while since an australian has replied to one of my posts
I'd like to keep it that way
>>65904322
Never met anyone as autistic as you Matt.
Don't you need to sleep at some point?
Surely you can't just spend all day waiting for new /brit/ threads to be made to spam your yellow fever in?
>>65904322
hi~
did you have fun at the archery range yesterday?
>work tomorrow
Every Brit in this thread listen to this Album right now.
Seriously, if this island had a soundtrack other than orchestra it'd be this, especially if you live in a city like Manchester, London, Birmingham etc Just give this gem a listen guys
Recommend tracks:
>In McDonald's
>Raver
>Shell of Light
POST THE RECORDING OF YOU FUCKING THE CHINESE PROZZIE MATE
don't dog the boyssss
>>65904402
>especially if you live in a city like Manchester, London, Birmingham
So if I am statistically either black or a paki?
>>65904402
mate it's not 2008 anymore we've all heard it by now
>>65904402
his first album is better
>>65904402
untrue? complete it mate.
>>65904422
>Being racist
>>65904402
Alright mate will check it out. I recommend you to check out Get Lucky by Daft Punk
Tempted to buy a million view 4chan advertisement for /int/ which would be a picture of the Falklands with a union jack on them and "The Falklands are British, definitely not Argentine" wrote across it. But is pissing off some Argie runts on the chon really worth 250 yankbucks?
I've ran out of cum lads
Had none in me for 2 days
>>65904454
>hard mathematical facts are racist
>>65904402
Think I'll fire up the ol' record player this fine Sunday morning
>>65904468
I'm sorry you live in such fear over nothing everyday. I hope you get better
>>65904460
definitely lad, definitely.
Me when browsing porn sites
forgot my myers-briggs type
>>65904486
>owning records
nerd alert
>>65904460
set up a crowdsourcing account I'll definitely contribute 10p
Man Dobby's a right little spastic. His plan doesn't even make any sense
>>65904493
are you going today aswell?
>>65904495
I watched that movie, it was pretty nice.
>myers-briggs type
height makes her open her eyes in shock.
girth makes her close them in ecstasy.
Never met a nice South African 2bh
morning lads. got a bit of a headache.
how are you lot doin?
https://www.reddit.com/r/TotallyStraight/comments/569osn/im_depressed_tonight_can_you_guys_help_me_out/?st=iu2gfxxy&sh=ea0681d6
Tragic
got called a little legend in the tescos car park when I downed a whole pack of mcvities
really want the American elections to end as soon as possible to get my mum to stop whining about Trump every day
it's mindboggling how much she hates Trump despite the fact she's not American
>>65904519
Might do a kickstarter for a "Falklands awareness campaign" then
TASK MASTER BURST THE BIONIC ZED SPLITTA
>>65904550
they're all cunts
>>65904550
youtube.com/serpentza
>>65904565
This site will get 100x better once the elections are over
Tom Scott looks like Matthew Macfadyen
I am going to tackle The Brothers Karamazov
https://strawpoll.de/7sb8erb
you'll be happy to know i stole about 7 dollars over the course of like 20 minutes and can now do laundry for free for the next few months
>>65904550
that's not bloody surprising man
making a cup of tea
>>65904637
just keep it below the neck haha
>>65904600
middle class chinese cities look quite comfy. basically just western cities but without the degeneracy.
Aussie post your prozzie recording pls
ISTJ-T
Jacob Rees-Mogg can't be real can he?
>>65904690
No, he's some sort of mass delusion we're all having
was having a legit debate with some other anon in another thread and I just lost interest in said debate so now it looks like I lost when in reality I just couldn't be arsed replying haha
doing an aeropress
>>65904690
let's hope so
>>65904565
desu they go on way too long
I think this year we had the longest election ever and people never stopped complaining and it was only like 10 weeks. They NEED a better system
>>65904644
Wahey
INFP here
>.jpg-large.jpg
>>65904677
>plunder
It's chunder you mong
third date with the (prospective) gf today
haven't kissed her yet
need to kiss her today
fuck
not even a beta male, the chance just hasn't come up
ASIO here
Where is this so-called Thainonce?
got an acquaintence who's a hairdresser and he's into the gayest shit, full nu male motorbikes, tats, sick beards et al
that said once showered with him and another bloke so who's the poof then?
Well lads, I just avoided becoming a wizard. Thank fuck for that.
>>65904637
see you in 6 months when you finish it LOL
need to kill some cats and other vermin today
>>65904728
There's basically no way to regulate the duration of election campaigns. Someone could start a campaign for 2020 right now if they wanted to
WITNESS THE FITNESS
>>65904739
I didnt make it, just trying to get the prozzie aussies attention.
Pls post recording prozzie aussie, itll be good bants, youll be a proper legend
>>65904773
congrats mate
dap
>>65904763
>mancave
ahh yes, nothing says manly like convincing your gf to let you have a space in the house where you can store your things
There is absolutely nothing wrong with loving Russia and opposing the evil American empire.
Anyone having regrets about voting out?
>>65904773
whats the cutoff, 30?
>>65904739
no it isn't you twat that's a different verse
>>65904817
t. remoaner trying to convince himself bregret is a thing
>>65904803
is the prozzie asian?
think I've lost interest now
>>65904828
No, it's Chunder Wumba, they were a Tory rock band
>>65904820
Yeah, had 7 years to go.
>>65904831
N-no!
>>65904815
Feel like a mancave element should be added to the Deano/Barrat copypasta 2bh
>>65904845
Not really. Just watching Sunday Politics and thought I'd ask.
Were you In or Out?
love wanking
*busts out a rap*
morning lads
>>65904763
i can and will hit a lick on any undercut+huge beard rocking poofters
>tfw you come downstairs in your ratty pyjamas and the lad you'll spend the rest of your life getting cummed in by is sat at your table shovelling bacon into his gob
>>65904885
well good morning
>>65904856
what are you on about you nutcase
>>65904862
Top Golf
Fantasy football
Paddy power
All inclusive holidays
>>65904831
fugg panicked for a second there
joke's on you I'm only 19
moaning lads
>Scottish "people"
>>65904885
evenin
>>65904495
movie?>>65904545
one of my gfs
>>65904817
Massively so
Thought it would give us more clout at negotiations didn't think we'd actually fucking do it
can't remember where my fuck up just is
>>65904910
>donut
mornin george
>>65904862
Man cave is an American thing
had a VERY poor sleep
>>65904877
out
making a meme
>>65904918
>all I can talk about is sex
>don't message me about sex
wat
>>65904918
>blankets
>>65904955
ah shit i remember this. that tshirt though lol
really despise the fact that you english wankers have got me, a scottish person, using your words like tbhfam
don't people realise they are simply DNA vessels and nothing more? DNA created us for its own ends.
>>65904966
fuck off rapist
>>65904919
lmao it's because of nitwits like you we voted out, that and corbyn
>>65904991
what's its end goal ?
>>65904942
>implying the sorts of runts who buy these houses haven't embraced it along with other American things like having turkey at Christmas
https://twitter.com/CuntsWatching/status/664198399244144640
hao ling
>>65904991
really makes the noggin cogs whirl
Lads
Is size 10 big for a girl?
Is 32D big or small for the booby region
Mum didn't know what to vote on the referendum day so I just told her to vote leave and she did it haha
Need some middleage normie parents facebook posting pls
>>65905008
immortality
>>65904966
A girl showed me her okcupid inbox once and it was full of creepy shit
>>65905050
prove it
>>65905008
crashing this plane
>>65905050
>>65904991
really making me think
good news lads
the wife has allowed me a small room in the house i pay for to store my beanbags and tv so i can watch the footy in peace (sometimes!!) hahaha absolutely ripper!!
masturbating
defecating
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8qcH7yND1Q
>>65905029
32D is a good lovely size
>>65905070
>>65905071
thank you so much for your outstanding contributions
i was jugging finessin & flexin
til i ran into the plug
thinking
>>65904817
I voted remain, but the fact that countries like India, Australia, South Korea, and Mexico (and a few other cunts) have all said that they want to sign trade deals as soon as we leave makes it a bit better
The Aussies being the good lads that they were have said that they'll send their trade negotiators to work with the Government in trade deals and start to train our first trade negotiators
Also, Trump saying that if he wins that we'll be first in line is good
>>65905057
its written in a book
>>65905099
Trump says a lot of things lad
>>65905092
what r u thinkin about
>>65905091
Etre de la dehors
white people BTFO
>>65905116
im ballin on you niggas dont nobody fuck with you cause u a scrub
>>65905131
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
https://twitter.com/KatePow3ll/status/785039629846274049
I wonder how our lives would be different if all the continents were closer together
>>65905113
I'm just trying to have a positive outlook on things
A trade agreement is far more realistic than a 2000 mile long wall that's 10 foot tall
Loving Death Grips - Money Store, you can get it on Spotify or Soundcloud!
>>65905131
wouldn't mind a tail if I could control it 2bh
>it's a "wake up at 11 angry with the gf for some reason" episode
can't wait to see what develops from this story arc lads
Psychedelics allow you to see unfiltered brain activity that is always present, but usually blocked to keep you in your safe, conditioned mental space. It freaks out the hive when one of the ants just wanders off alone. A caterpillar talking about growing wings would be considered insane.
>>65905089
no dramas
>drive from London to Scotland on a singe tank of petrol
I don't care that it's a magic car that's obviously bullshit. Immersion destroyed
was drunk last night and decided my living room was a good place to practice my tee-off
fucking wall is covered in holes
>>65905195
I like them but people who read too much into the experience are only damaging themselves 2bh
>>65905190
Are you sure?
On my TV right now it's a "woke up wanting to spoon but you realised you dumped the gf so had a good few wanks to shit on /gif/ and then got depressed" episode
>>65905161
Cannot comprehend why someone would be vegan unless they're some "spiritual" pretentious spastic or some shite
>>65905228
keep your pineal gland closed my friend
>>65905218
What car?
>>65904917
please
>>65905260
Renault Clio
>>65905255
would step on 100 of em for a kebab
>>65905255
yeah
Really think the whole clown prank thing began just as a viral marketing tactic by some marketing firm to build hype around scary clowns before the new It movie releases 2bh
>>65905255
yeah then id give like £100m to some dog's home to make everything ok
>>65905255
Yes
I wouldn't kill it
I might lightly tread on its tail and spend £2,000 getting it fixed if it breaks
>>65905235
Yeah just double checked la
>>65905244
FUCK OFF MURDERER
>>65905250
enjoy ur schizophrenic delusions my friend, keep looking into sacred geometry im sure you'll find the answer x
Doing a coffee
>>65905276
>france
>>65905255
>tfw you see all the people on facebook commenting that they wouldn't do it
I don't think they can comprehend the sum of 18 billion dollars
>>65905279
that's my theory too desu
that or the purge tv show
>>65905298
I've found the answer so I hung up the phone
>>65905255
i'd smash the fuck out of that thing, for like, £10,000
>>65905255
Well, yeah obviously. Unless it can cure cancer or can write out the secrets to interstellar travel, yeah
Business idea: become a cat
wrecked my laptop and too skint to get a new one oh dear oh dear
>>65905274
Yeah its possible
I have one with a 1.6 and if I do 65 in 6th gear that's when I can get the best MPG and the trip computer says I can get about 450 miles on a full tank
London to Greta Green is only 326 miles
I drove from Preston to Plymouth on one tank and then had enough petrol for a few days of driving around there and filled up the morning I was to drive back
>Well, yeah obviously. Unless it can cure cancer or can write out the secrets to interstellar travel, yeah
>>65905222
>>65905355
Why is every Irish person an absolute mentalist
>>65905355
what did you learn from this experience?
>>65905297
Well that's what it is on my TV
Quite a sad episode
I think its going to be on repeat for the next few weeks
For everybody hoping that Trump loses the election: Even if he does, keep in mind that Trump is a symptom, not the root cause of the problem
>>65905376
fascinating
*walks away and talks to someone else*
>>65905298
jokes on you i had those before i started abusing acid
>>65905381
reminds me of the lad who drives around drunk in a car that not only is uninsured but unregistered for the road hahaha
oh my days
>>65905161
Christ that could easily be taken out of context
>>65905429
pictured: an author who is better than sartre
reminder bendy buses had someone who would give you snacks on board.
it was a mistake to get rid of them
haha lads had a sick night was pinging to fuck, gurning my fucking face off
>>65905443
Are those Lima beans?
condom slipped off inside her lads
had to dig it out
my short term memory is absolutely shot to pieces, I have to fight to remember something for 5 seconds.
yet if I try and recall something from months ago and struggle to do so, I can cast that thought to the back of my mind and the answer will appear an hour later.
gf on the right
>>65905443
>1 snout
>barely enough weed for a joint
>2 paracetamol
would not even gatecrash
>>65905449
good lad
>seeing death grips on wednesday
>>65905443
Don't believe this to be real
>>65905381
didn't smash it up or anything just spilled beer on it
>>65905485
me on the left
>>65905457
crease
she didn't reply lads
>>65905485
>No eyebrows
Jesus Christ
Most girls look ok without makeup but she's terrifying
can't put my finger on what makes british women the best in the world
>>65905503
hello nigger
>>65905535
terrible not even funny what sort of punchline is that
>>65905485
women are so 2 faced
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbaFq043TiE
>>65905550
>pic unrelated
Back from the barbers and unsurprisingly, the paki fucked it up
At least instead of doing too much, he did almost nothing at all
I was very fucking clear with him, if the hair isn't growing from the scalp - cut it
The bastard then proceeds to cut the hair that was creeping over my ear
I tell him to stop fucking doing that and repeat my instructions
"oh you mean like an undercut"
After that, he does the sides right I suppose, not like there was much to do, just lift the hair and run the machine over it
The bullshit was the back, he left it mostly untouched, just cleaned up the bottom part, the very bottom part
The worst part was when he said that he'd even it up but I have no fucking idea what he actually did, did he cut the hair growing from the top of my head shorter? or did he make the shorter hair shorter?
I paid 7 quid for this shit
Had to watch 3 of his friends jump the queue too
>>65905550
2 > 4 > 3 > 1 > 5 = 6
>>65905485
why she got no eyebrows though
>>65905550
Strong jaws and extra fat, they will survive well in the wild
>>65905535
Cos you called her mate tb h
>>65905560
stupid bitch asked a stupid question
>>65905569
She rubbed them out
>>65905550
I spy with my little eye some absolute whoppers on the right
>>65905550
2 is a man
honestly prefer small breasts
>>65905551
pot kettle
>>65905550
>all have brown eyes
wtf part of the UK is this?
>>65905626
>>65905599
honestly prefer any breasts
>>65905648
0161 manny on the map
>ywn
>>65905648
birmingham
>>65905657
>fake
keep em
>>65905550
Is any of these an actual brit? I mean they all look kinda swarthy.
>I paid 7 quid for this shit
>seven (7) pounds
class when gazza gets the belvedere in!
>>65905677
>>65905677
Saved
>>65905669
>>65905679
Revolting
>>65905677
good lord
>>65905699
for what??
>>65905669
I DON'T WANNA HEAR NO TALK ABOUT MANNY ON THE MAP MANNY ON WHAT? MANNY ON MUTE
>>65905692
It's Birmingham so they're all Asians
>>65905711
was from a post I barely read
coffee was good, going to have another
>>65905722
ok sorry
>>65905565
>After that, he does the sides right I suppose, not like there was much to do, just lift the hair and run the machine over it
>The bullshit was the back, he left it mostly untouched, just cleaned up the bottom part, the very bottom part
>Germany, UK and USA will all have female leaders by December
We are absolutely fucked, Maggie was bad enough, now there's three of them.
>>65905349
2, 1
>pay $15 a month for netflix
>constantly removing decent shit
>added 21 things this month
>all netflix original shit
>now trending: shaolin soccer
get utterly fucked you cretinous melts
Bit of OC lads
>>65905747
>hereditary female leader is good
>elected female leader is bad
explain how
>>65905747
Would love Hilary to order a drone strike on my bollocks
>>65905744
This is pretty much what I'm after, I can have it if someone just makes it a bit neater
having a tug
having a pull
having a stroke
having a wank
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_XEBdPLRC8
actually found this quite amusing
>>65905716
state of that
just had a really satisfying poo lads. not even kidding. it was real solid with no mess, anal tearing or splash-back or anything. only had to wipe once too
feeling good about it
>>65905792
fuck videos like this that momentarily make me think my headphones are broken
>>65905771
netflix ended the golden age of television (the wire, mad men, breaking bad, lost, sopranos etc) and supplanted it with data gathered contrived trend riding formulaic sjw propaganda
>>65905701
absolutely fuck these cunts
>>65905787
>This is pretty much what I'm after
the absolute STATE of that chop
also
>going to a barber for a cut like that
fucking mug
"It is sedition to dispute what a king may do."
-Me
>>65905792
One minute in and liking it lad
>>65905787
why do you want a girl's haircut lad?
>>65905716
That's not the UK, the bus is on the wrong side of the road.
>the golden age of television
>the wire, mad men, breaking bad, lost, sopranos etc
>>65905735
don't let it happen again
>>65905847
>what is a one way street
Well lads, made the proto-gf my actual gf
/gf2016/ accomplished
>>65905701
i've stolen so much belvedere and gray goose, like so much man, and i still really hate these cunts
>>65905865
Fuck, you're right.
>>65905792
Finished watching, I also founding it amusing lad
>>65905867
you have to maintain it
Havnae slept
>>65905809
it's the simple things in life
>>65905834
I'm trans
>>65905827
What's wrong with a pixie? It's what you get before growing it out further into a bob
Went to a barbers because I'm not confident enough to go to a salon yet
>like so much man
imagine talking like this
>>65905824
the only netflix original i actually enjoyed was stranger things and like 1 documentary. the rest is utter dog shit.
>tfw dicklet
>girl yesterday was saying i'm the girthiest she's been with
bizarro, she was tight af. Pretty sure I'd fail the toilet-roll test.
well lads
here we are
Heil Hitler!
me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YE1eRktpT90
Looking forward to seeing the Hill Dog destroy the Don Runt tonight
What a stonking day
been out for a walk around a few parks lads, was VERY nice. literally perfect weather imho.
>chilly
>clear sky
>sun shining
>>65905938
the toilet roll test only works with Yank bog roll because the tubes are smaller mate
>>65905933
They place more emphasis on satisfying audience expectations than fulfilling writer's inspiration.
All the best written shows are off netflix.
some deplorable stole my back number plate at some point last night
like, why?
>>65905984
yeh i know. wish i wasnt so hungover.
>>65905991
couldn't get mine through a British toilet roll tube desu
got a pretty phat one though
>>65905970
This specimen needs to put himself in a bin and remain there indefinitely.
what is a douche and why are yanks obsessed with them
>>65906033
same hahaha could barely get the tip in :s
>>65906048
You
Just because
>>65906031
I was lad, hungover and a cokey blocked nose. But the fresh air and double espresso flushed it all away.
well, i still feel quite shit but ya know hahahaa
>>65906012
dont know sorry
just watched the Trump recording
literally wasn't even that bad
>scratched my arse
>takes a sniff
ah yes
NEED Yank gf
garlic bread
>>65906033
prove it
>>65906035
you're aware it's a joke yeah you fucking spanner?
>>65905747
maggie saved britain
hillary will do the same for the US
>>65906075
was pretty bad tbf
>>65906089
yes...
this Luke Cage show has a few laughs
>Plan to force firms to reveal foreign staff numbers abandoned
ah yess Hard Brexit being slowly undone by moaning lefties
>>65906093
>that top lip
very lovely
>>65906078
howd it smell
The Saudi Arabia-led coalition fighting Yemeni rebels has said it will launch an investigation after more than 140 people were killed in air strikes on a funeral in the capital, Sanaa.
wish I had the funds to get a fee of these
>>65906093
Cor
>>65906075
it's not that bad for a lad down the pub, world leaders are held to different standards though
>>65906151
>mudslimes killing mudslimes
oh yeh something i deeply care about lol
>>65906141
it's a pretty shit idea tbf
>>65906141
that's literally something hitler did
>>65906146
>>65906158
heading down to a lovely Sam Smiths pub by the river lads wahheyyyy
Terrified of death lads
>>65906119
it was just some year 8-tier, private banter with a pal
he acted respectfully, if not a bit autistic, when he met the woman
>>65906193
pint of taddy for me
excited about death lads
>>65906187
would happily make a questionable tackle on her
at least a yellow
me and the husbando
>>65906187
phwwwaaaaaooooaaooooaoaaoooar
>>65906222
yesss my laaaad
>>65906190
what would you do with them if you had them lad?
>>65906193
doxed
>>65906187
would fuqq but clearly a basic bitch.
Made me think, this
>>65906280
hold them and look at them probably
Lads is it feasible to go from 22k to a 30-35k a year job ?
It's literally doing the exact same thing but just somewhere else.
I have about a year's post uni experience but not sure if they'll reject me because the salary jump is too big.
It's literally no different to what I do now though, as in if I copied the job description it'd stay the same.
>>65906187
*uses the hubble telescope to try and find her arse*
*grabs you right in the pussy*
>>65906225
i actually am.
not because im depressed and want to die. im just fascinated about what happens after death. im fairly certain nothing happens and you just cease to exist in any capacity but still, will be interesting to find out for sure.
>>65906293
what a fucking L E D G E N D
>>65906293
fucking madmen them gurkhas
shameful how this country treated them
>>65906313
why would they reject you? is it at a different firm? why would they know your past salary
morning
Shit, shower, shave lads
>>65906293
Good lad
>>65906348
>ledgend
>>65906350
It's not a firm as such, it's for local government.
They know my past salary because the application asks for it and it doesn't state anything about minimum experience so they might just think I'm useless or something
>>65906359
haha it's afternoon you nutcase x
wew my lads
ws 7000 in the queue for a song on the 'seek a month ago, now number 54
G E T
H Y P E
want to see the northern lights
>excited about death lads
>i actually am.
>not because im depressed and want to die. im just fascinated about what happens after death. im fairly certain nothing happens and you just cease to exist in any capacity but still, will be interesting to find out for sure.
>>65906379
only just!
>>65906390
stop talking about the 'seek
afternoon boys
>>65906397
what does anime have to do with death?
>>65906394
seen 'em, load of guff mate.
just want to have fun
t.girl
>>65906378
I highly doubt it mate
worth a punt anyway, if you get an interview then you can tell them about your experience
>>65906390
how does soulseek work?
>>65906411
fair enough have a nice day
>>65906419
yeah don't think so. Piss off Hans.
>>65906394
soulseek is the epitome of autism
all of its users are fat melts who haven't showered in 6 weeks
gis a new thread boys
>>65906457
y-you too
>>65906313
That jump is about the same as going from a standard pleb to a team leader. Not at all unheard of if you can convince them you can do the job.
the gf is a proper little dominatrix type and I'm a bit bent so I let her do her thing but now my friends think I'm whipped
agony aunts