/brit/

>>65816022

>honestly believes you can have a friend of the opposite gender


Both of you have thought about fucking each other at least a few times. Probably would too.

Need a gf

thinking about buying mafia 3

>>65816123
Everyone thinks about shagging their friends. The fact that you don't do it is what defines a friendship

goodnight you autistic virgin racists

>>65816214

>racist

Hey, I jerk off to black girls all the time

Someone teach me a lovely new word

I've heard some Poles in Camden got drunk and entered a mosque to throw bacon at people

https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1475803197560.webm

>>65816266
callipygian
As in, "your mother is callipygian"

>>65816266
verisimilitude

what kind of fucking idiot plays the lottery

Lads

Cannot be bothered to meet and speak to women but I feel like I should be at least attempting to shag around because it's """normal"""

conflicted

im a gangsta ass nigga

>>65816358

you won't be calling me an idiot when I win a cool 600 million

>>65816169
Are you some kind of faggot?

>>65816393
naughty cad

We're all in here

>>65815991
>>65815991
>>65815991

>>65816401
i will

>>65816286
http://talkradio.co.uk/news/two-polish-men-arrested-throwing-bacon-worshippers-camden-mosque-1610054985
Kek
Defenders of Europe, saviours of Christianity, true hussars

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeffrey_Dahmer

just read half of this article

need some feel good /brit/ vibes before I go to bed or I'll have nightmares

good edition

fighting my demons

Why yes I am an anarcho-polandphile

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>sorry, who are you again? haha

Would love a Polish girl I could sexually abuse desu.

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http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/2016/03/15/aborted-babies-incinerated-to-heat-uk-hospitals/

love our progressive society lads

Poland is full of closet homosexuals

>sports psychology

how on earth did you even

Chips, two chicken breast wraps and some garlic bread for lunch x

>>65818344
top bants poland

well played

still managing to be xenophobic while being treated xenophobically

>>65821671
Push up bras work wonders

>>65821711
alri fatty haha

>>65816153
Same

Probably won't though hahaha

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IM HERE LADS

START TOUCHING YOURSELF, RIGHT NOW!

>>65816393
Go to your GP

Probably low test

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>>65820757

>>65821679
You can have mine, she's fucking annoying.

>>65821761
What does she do that annoys you?

when girls say "tall, dark and handsome" do they just mean dark hair or what?????

>>65821748
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MUMSj4AZsI

>>65816153
>>65821733
kill yourselves you useless nignogs

>>65821774
Yes

>>65821774
dark as in edgy

>>65816016
gib polish gf

>>65821774
>>65821774
yes, like spanish

>>65821774
could mean dark as in tanned, like Mediterranean
could mean dark as in personality

>>65821748
what I want to know is, who told him his hair looked good like that?

>>65821749
Thanks mate I'll give it a whirl

I'll leave it a few weeks and see how I'm doing though because in all fairness I've just lost the gf (she didn't die but i wish she did)

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>>65821685

>>65821773
She has a terrible sense of humour, literally primary school tier, she keeps making weird food and she takes forever to make decisions.

How did youtube food reviews become a thing?

>>65821876
Sounds fun.

>and she takes forever to make decisions.
That's why men exist.

>>65821876
Stop dating Polish children you fucking nonce

>>65821725
Still plenty of tit

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brave

>>65821910
It gets tiresome though, we'll go to a restaurant and she literally takes about 20 mins to decide what she wants. I don't even bother going shopping with her any more, last time we went to Tesco we were there for nearly two hours.

>>65821774
simplest answer is always the most accurate in these cases.

they mean they want a big black bf. nothing more, nothing less.

>>65821925
It's common knowledge that most polish girls have a very basic sense of humour

>>65821955
his mom looks like darla crane.

>>65821940
C cup at best

>>65821437
>>65821437
Pls help

>>65821955
Why does he look 11?

He's in his twenties, isn't he?

I kinda want a donner on chips

Think I'd have to up my DNP to 400mg to justify it though

I'm not really hungry but it's raining outside, it would be so comfy

and today I hit a new low of 144.5lbs...I deserve a reward

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his hair looks on point 2bh

>>65821876
so when are you going to dump her/murder her

hot opinions incoming:
restricting who gives advice to our government on the basis of nationality alone is needlessly inefficient and gives no guarantee of a better outcome for either the govt or many workers
ideas should be able to stand on their own merit

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Been left in charge of my local for a few hours so the owner can go to a funeral... it's reasonable to help myself to a couple of pints right?

>>65822082
Very Hitleresque

>>65822082
looks like he's never even held a girls hand before

>>65822082
fashion icon of an entire generation of memesters

>>65821955
What video is this from?

>>65822082
I really don't get his guy, is he a Timcase?

yanks im requesting you rename this """city"""

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Melbourne,_Florida

>>65822082
who the fuck is this pipsqueak
>>65822115
yes it's your duty. when asked, spillages

>>65822108
counter business idea: fuck off paki

>>65822103
We already split up for a few weeks but I got lonely cos i'm pathetic and now I'm stuck with her. She's really good in bed so it's gonna be difficult to let her go.

>>65822115
Whats on tap?

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I HAVE ARRIVED

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Listening to some grime and doing some uncalcifying

>>65822165
He's literally a functioning autist. He's not crazy like Tim but he definitely has issues when it comes to interacting with other people.

>>65822252
wearing a granddad suit from the 50's he got for $3.99

>>65822181
i can probably pull some strings but my plan would involve you conquering the ""city""

some blood will have to spill, naturally....

>>65822263
reviewbrah is based

>>65822214
Guiness, smiths, carling, fosters, strongbow, woodpecker, mcewans. Think if I'm going to help myself in should hit the spirits really.

>>65822313
Yeah I like his vids but there's definitely something off about him.

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>reviewbrah is based

>>65822263
he does these lecture videos that are like 40+ minutes long and in one of them when he was about 15-16 or so he was complaining about how everyone at school gives him a hard time and how it makes him feel like shit


i feel bad for him 2bh

>>65822341
Have a Guinness and post a pic on here

watch all the yanks start creaming in their XXXXL trackies

>>65822434
yes

>>65822378
I know but he's in his early 20s now and he needs to move on or he'll be in perpetual arrested development.

>>65822434
i guess

>>65822434
is this miss alice?

>>65822208
ah yes

Just copped a euromillions lads
Go ahead calm me a runt
You cunts won't be getting a penny

>>65822479
yeah

can tell from a mile away

>>65822528
swear she looks different in every vid / pic

looks completely diff here:

>>65822511

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>not liking reviewbrah

>>65822479
I thought Miss Alice was a tranny/trap

Just watched a BBC documentary about Lewis Carroll, he was such an obvious nonce, and so many historians and superfans make excuses for him it's hilarious. He took full frontal photos of little girls in sexual poses for chrissakes

In a paki chippy for lunch lads

>>65822594
noice

>>65822594
why does she always pull these weird faces and attempt to be cute?

it looks stupid as fuck

>>65822544
she doesn't really

these webms being posted now are quite old

here's her most recent cam shows

https://camshowdownloads.com/2FNJ54/model/myfreecams/MissAlice_94

>>65822594
is this what autism looks like

Miss Alice's body is something else.

190kg's body is somewhere else (its own planet)

>australian humour

https://youtu.be/gc6LiR77gMM
how visible is this actually in London? it's amazing that my fucking ears could hear dirty words I had learnt in 4chan.

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>>65822379

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>>65822721

Imagine being a pretty girl walking around in a short skirt with no knickers on

>>65822667
*hands you a mirror*

Really like that Miss Alice doesn't do couple shows.

Especially since I've been chatting in her room.

Nice when girls don't betray you by having consensual sex with people of the opposite gender.

>>65822757
Ok, will do xx

>>65822742
>that pour

literally just projectile vomited

>>65822594
perfect chebs

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>>65822778

>>65822742
What the fuck are you doing

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>>65822791
Looking fine to me

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>>65822721

don't make nasty comments about my nation ever again or i'll do something about it

why don't girls like meeeeeeeeeeeee :(

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHEOF_rcND8

good song

>>65822776
back the fuck off?!

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>>65822829
shut up you abo criminal fucking cunt

>>65822855
ARKENSAW

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>>65822829

>don't make nasty comments about my nation ever again or i'll do something about it

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give me (you)s

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*does something about it*

>>65822855
actually just clicked on this link as I fancy a listen

Business idea: people who give him attention get a trip too so I can filter them aswell

>>65822897
you sure fucked this up here lad

CAT, I'm a kitty cat, and I meow meow meow, and I meow meow meow.

>>65822824
stop

you're just wasting it

at least just drink a few of the plebby bottles of beer ffs

>update phone to android nougat
>battery life goes to shit
t-thanks jewgle

Nothing wrong with fracking you bloody hippies

There's a few fitties on The Apprentice this year but they're all such vacuous shits that I simply shan't be developing any sort of vicarious attachment to any of them.

>>65822928
:-(

>>65822967
we'll see about that

*fracks you*

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> Nothing wrong with fracking you bloody hippies

File: Hopeman hopes.png (89KB, 480x280px)

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>>65822979
There's always a next time

>tfw going out tomorrow night to get back at the girl who i beta orbit because she decided to fuck someone else
>tfw can't find my purple tie

reee

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xoxo

3D women are RUEFUL creatures, all of them are SCUM, why won't they LOVE me, i just want a pure waifu but they ALL WANT CHAD IT'S NOT FAIR

I will destroy all of them...every last one of them...I've rotted in loneliness for 20 years...the day of retribution will punish them

>>65822791
That's how it always looks when you first pour it, even if you hold the glass at an angle. It'll only clear up and darken when you leave it for about 50 seconds, at which point you're meant to top it up.

t. barman

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Woman with a thicc arse keeps walking past my desk and smiling at me.

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>>65822999
I truly am lucky.

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>>65822961
How am I wasting it?

>>65822855
not bad

Just went to a paki shop and they're selling 440ml cans of beer from supermarket multipacks, shall I report them?

i've dropped her now.

give it a rest.

oi dickheads

>>65823043
making me thirsty lad

3 hrs till beer o clock and im an alcoholic not good

>>65822899
What's that picture from?

>>65823093
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdYBCyFyww-1mxvylJsIZOA/videos

genuine cunts

the lot of you

*closes tab*

hey so a girl called me a loser and made fun of my accent
what a bitch right haha

nah i don't care, im above that

...a loser
why would she say that?

bit mean

she was pretty too

really letting this get to me

HAHA kidding im alpha

fucking bitch
fucking cunt

im not a loser
why would you say that
im not
im not

stop
not a loser

fucking womyn

i feel like hitting something

>>65823069
May aswell la
I reported a brothel before after the polish whore was being a bitch and it got shut down

>>65823043
Looks tasty lad. Ignore the autistic runtato.

>>65823003
Wind street?

>>65823089
You don't go for a pint on Friday lunchtimes? Fucking casual

man i love getting (you)'s complaining about my trash normie life

>>65823069
Definitely. It's literally tax dodging.

>>65823125
Which polish whore?

im gay lol

>>65822594
best thing i've seen today

>>65823163
we kno m8
lol

>>65823163
Same

so get this lads

this girl who i obsess over and beta orbit hardcore fucked another guy but guess what? i dropped her. yep, that's right. that'll show her.

>>65823153
How so?

check out #wearescotland

>>65823129
Sometimes but my working hours are so lax I didn't start till 11 and wanna finish at 5

also lunchtime pints tend to be a slippery slope

could drink a few tins at me desk tho

>>65823156
the one I paid 60 quid to shag

>felling depressed so waste half the day
>randomly stop feeling depressed but now mad that you wasted half the day

It's a vicious cycle

moving to brighton lads

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>>65823184

>being this obsessed you remember my recent interactions with girls to a high degree

how could a swine like her call me, a supreme gentleman, a loser?

Dropped that bitch haha. I just prep the bull now, and don't spend any time thinking about her AT ALL.

>all these newfag bruces giving him the attention he craves

Got a business idea lads.

Right, so next month I'm going to a music festival in another country on my own. Apart from a small handful of acts, most of them are pretty obscure (although I suppose they are probably more popular in their own country).

Now I'm thinking... should I pretend to be a scout from a big studio or whatever, in an attempt to charm qt music girls and bang them?

stop giving him attention you fucking idiots

hmm i fancy a girl

i'll make her desire me by not showing interest in her and by flirting with other girls to demonstrate my value as a manwhore not looking to get a gf

surely this will work well

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stop picking on me guys

>tfw want to move out of student house
>tfw can only do so if there is someone I can find to replace me
How do I do it, lads? How do I find someone to replace me in this property with three other tenants? Do people still move around to live in different places when it is October, especially into a house with people they had never met before?

>>65823259
no, just shelf a shitload of pingas and bring them into the festival. you can fuck whoever you want there if you are carrying high quality pingas

>>65823122
>>65823136
>>65823163
>>65823221
LOVE this gimick

I HATE WOMEN LITERALLY NOTHING GOOD ABOUT THEM

fucking idiots giving me attention.

how fucking new are you?

third year is the new freshers la everyone knows that

blates gonna lose my v this time

>>65823303
But I won't be able to get any drugs. Its in a foreign country and I don't know anyone there

>>65823324
Where in Swansea are you from?

WOMAN? MORE LIKE WOE, MAN

that's because that's all they bring as i wait by her bedroom door to bring her a fresh hot towel and lucozade after her sweaty fuck session with another guy...might drop her though...that'll teach her a thing or two.

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*gives him attention*

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what did he be this mean?

my name jeff hahahahahaha

am so close to banging this girl la
right when shes done with this guy ill swoop in

>>65823347
yeah idk drugs are easily your best bet imo. what type of festival is it?

>>65823351
doxxable info

marxism works im SERIOUS guys just go to uni

no, black people arent equal, racemixing is disgusting

>>65823384
My guess is, one can't help but feel that the Chinese are a subspecies

fuck women lol
why don't they love me
what a bunch of bitches
sluts the lot of em

>>65823404
It's a city festival, I think it started as like an electronic one but now it has a bit of everything there. Most of it is Icelandic music though

>>65823303

the girls will just use you for your drugs, they wont actually have sex with you lol

i can't BELIEVE women don't like me. I eat box even if i've just met them, that's the kind of la i am

i think i actually need to find a female who I like as an actual person.

shame i can't find one as they're fucking retards.

they're just fuck buckets to me.

I ditched her, not the other way round

she DESERVED it

>>65823445
you'll cop a few roots if you carry but odds are if you are flashy you'll get robbed at one point or another haha

Fucked her for a good two seconds

fucking women what is their problem, i've tried everything
insulting them, whining behind their backs, avoiding them in public, letting them and their male friends borrow my bedroom to study in for a good 2 hours
they're all cunts

>>65823405
mount pleasant runt confirmed

about to watch a reality show where innocent people infiltrate a prison and film their experiences

it's called 60 days in

any of you wankers seen it?

>>65823519
Actually love it

>>65823519
Nah but I've seen that documentary your dad made called 60 gays in, is it anything like that?

how long until lisicki follows through with his destiny and becomes the girl he thinks he deserves to get

>>65823519
watched an eppie and it was pre good

just remembered i've recorded the newest michael mosley doco waheyy

Someone post THAT picture

Just won £90 off a tenner on the FOBTs my laaads
Cheeky 3 quid split on 8 double dropping

>>65823546

yeah yeah yeah nah

women are literally just holes and slabs of meat for men to shag

not sure why none of them love me??

girls..

good gimmick this lads

>>65823303
Not true
t. MDMA retailer

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Still no customers, considering throwing stuff on the fire...

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some people ask me who i'm walking toward, but they've never considered that perhaps it is who i'm walking away from...

>>65823654
HOWLING

what a droll meme

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPhUPo4IJTc

alri lads ahahaha

HAHA

>>65823654
Incredibly Deep

This Really Made Me Think

>>65823647
Are you the Oxfordshire lad

>>65823647
throw me on it

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could one of you lads do me a favour and make this picture go viral. I would like it to be known as the 'Alt right walking man' and for it to appear on CNN and fox news.

Thanks in advance

>>65823654

really made me go hmm..

so i think this girl fancies me (she's a model)

she's from Rochdale (doxxable info) and she keeps laughing at all my jokes

she's self harmed though, red flag?

would love to shag her for a good 2 hours, think im in love lads

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>>65823590

>>65823647

chuck a piss on it aha

don't worry, runts

i'm here now

hahaha

what happens in weston supermarket

>>65823519
never heard of it? is it american? (probably fake)

>The Grand Tour
ahh yes very good

>£79/year

get tae fuck amazon

Had no idea May would turn out to be such a rorke

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>>65823697
Nah lad, I'm in a poortherner.

Found a left over garlic bread with cheese... that's gotta burn well.

>>65823823
do it hahahahaha

>>65823823
it'll make a fairly odd odour, I warn ye

>>65823845
Nope.

I took the 400mg dose but the takeaway was closed, I guess it's changed its opening hours? or undergoing renovation?

Guess this is a good thing since I'll just lose more weight from the additional DNP dose....though I kinda fancy getting a burger meal instead...maybe a 2 quid one from Rajas or a proper nice one from Arizonas?

haha yeah id love to go on the meetup with /brit/ but everyone would know who i am because im the tall good looking welsh lad

totally not afraid that everyone would bully me and take the piss out of me for being a lanky self-obsessed idiotic cretin

desu

Ignore it

do not engage it

sigh...

got an alright friends circle but struggle talking to the girls of the group haha

hmm...

>>65823875
would join you there.

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It burns pretty well.
Better than expected.png

Deny communication to it

FUCK CAPITALISM!!!!!!!!!!!


Tweet sent from Twitter App for iPhone

Unironically crossdress lads

Obviously not going to transition like some runt but it's quite fun desu

>>65823936
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwmS0okyuqM

>>65823936
he did it

the utter madman!!!!!

>>65823936
Spastic

>>65823796

it's american but i don't think it's fake, however it would likely be heavily edited as most reality TV shows are.

christ

>>65823967
Post pics

>>65823945
us Marxists acknowledge capitalism was good.

don't be retarded.

>>65824008
At work atm and not sure I want to be banned haha

>190kg is a marxist now

that girl really did a number on him

>>65824032
Just DO IT

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Toasty warm sat in front of this, considering what to drink next, maybe a bloody mary.

>>65824077
it's not even cold outside

>>65824077
oi mate can i get a gin & tonic thanks

>>65823936

What the fuck are you doing? is this at work or something

190cm aka The Walking Void of Likeability

out of milk. ergo i shall be going to the shop today

>>65824052
>now?

i've been a marxist for years.

NEW SCOTANON CALL

This time, I call up Robert Gordon University, Poleaboo's Alma Mater, to present evidence against him in his upcoming disciplinary case.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1lBvRswGFz6

>>65824107
I've been left in charge of a pub because the owner couldn't get cover so they could go to a funeral.

>>65824134

Feel sorry for the cunt who has to pull burned garlic bread out of that fireplace desu.

Deflect conversation away from it

got my feelings hurt

getting closer to Christmas lads, meaning the Gimmick&Personality awards are coming closer

last year, winners were Kevposting as the gimmick and Ribena as personality, right?

reckon Timposting, Runtposting, "ah yes"posting, the Janny and Desklad will do well this year

>>65824134
>best friend dies
>leave kid in charge of a pub
>funeral hits hard
>plan out afternoon of eating garlic pizza which was the best friends favourite piza
>come back to the pub to eat and reflect on a life well lived
>no customers
>kid standing there awkwardly on his phone
>garlic pizza in the fireplace burnt to the size of coin

>>65824205
>kevposting

i literally won it, fuck off

bollocks have been swollen for 2 days
going to wank it out

>>65824225
"Lisickiposting" is actually "kevposting" since that loveable Irish lad in the kitchen isn't you

>>65824242
*sucks you off again*

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>>65824127

where can I find polish ppl in London?

>>65824256
http://www.strawpoll.me/6413126/r

and in the poll it was voted as "lisicki"

fuck off

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b71aefH8tO8

>>65824205
desklad hasn't been relevant for months lad

>>65824127
>poleaboo probably seen my gf at some time

wew

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>>65824216
Have a (you) for making me snigger like a kid seeing boobs for the first time.

it's another episode of "try desperately to make me jealous by inventing utter bullshilt"

ah yes, so-called "girls"

Brit on holiday

Been here since Monday and still haven't got over the jet lag. Been awake since 5am

>>65824352
dont care

>>65824352
east or west coast?

coz if it's east coast you've got something wrong with you

>>65824352
ebin blog post

subscribed

>>65824205
desklad's rep hasnt been the same since he uploaded photos of his fat gf

seems like a grim existence.

imo tim and runt posting will be the two favourites; ahh yes will be a close second behind the runt

>>65824127
>poleaboos name is Amir Hussain

he is actually a paki? jesus

File: Surprisefags.jpg (468KB, 1080x1920px)

468KB, 1080x1920px

>>65824300
Don't hurt my feelings plz

>>65824407
D: D: D: D:

alri desklad

>>>/vip/

space?

>>65824352
I care.

>>65824393
Fuck off cuckold.

>>65824390
California babes

>>65824404
you surely can't be this ne

>>65824478
how are the slags thus far

>>65824478
that's normal, you should be good by sunday/monday

I 'fix' myself by 1hr/day

coming back from CA is way worse tho, you're gonna be shattered for a fortnight

>>65824496
Fit af

>>65824491
interrogative enclitic

>>65824491
no

I just couldn't care less about the situation

>>65821685
I thought that's where stem cells come from?

>6 hour old thread

wew it's been a long one eh lads

if tim wins gimmick of the year this year i'll i've won back to back years since i founded both kev and tim posting

blimey

if any clown comes fucking near me i'll knock the cunts head clean off his runtish shoulders lads

>>65824586
>>65824586
>>65824586
>>65824586
>>65824586
New

>>65824127
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s1lBvRswGFz6

this is great.

>>65824127
you spelt poleaboo wrong when you gave her the blog name you dafty