How can I self fuck myself?, help¡!! :((((((((+

Dont do it. Just use a dildo instead. Because believe it or not, dicks can break. And if your unlucky that can happen if you try that.

You have to practice and that just wont happen. Dicks dont break that easy

i can selffuck
my skype is fruitloops666 if u want to
first, your dick wont break, since the moment u put in, u need to have a soft dick.
1 start soft, or it wont happen
2 practice
3 repeat 2 500 times, pausing when u get hard
once u have the dick inside, firm it on the base pushing down and hold in the miidle so it dont pop out
ps: the first time u put it in, you cum almost intantly, it gets out of control. you get used to the stimulation after some time...
contact me if u want.(other people too)
Lucas.

be sure uve had an enema, so u dont make a shitty mess!!!!

>>1504312
>i can selffuck
>my skype is fruitloops666 if u want to
>first, your dick wont break, since the moment u put in, u need to have a soft dick.
>1 start soft, or it wont happen
>2 practice
>3 repeat 2 500 times, pausing when u get hard
>2 500 times
>500
Why? Theres no way this feels that good

>>1504272
I think different people do it different ways, but here's how I do it. You have to lube up the hole, but not too much. If you lube it up too much, your dick will come back out very easily. You can use spit, lube, lotion, or soap to lube it up. I like to put it to the right side of my balls. You sort of pull your balls to the left and put your dick to the right, then turn your dick upside down, then push it in to your hole slowly. You might have to pull on your dick a bit and push it in more on the shaft part. It may not happen your first time or even your 10th time. It takes practice. Also I was never able to cum for a very long time. It takes a lot of time and patience, unless you're a quick cummer, which I am not. But once you finally do cum inside yourself... it feels amazing! I would say the first time it happened it felt like my first time ever coming. You'll know when it's going to happen. There will be a build up to it and it will feel better and better and better until you know you're going to cum. Another note, your dick has to be completely flaccid for this to work. You may start to get hard after a while, just wait for it to get flaccid again. Best of luck!

I can turn my dick upside down, but I can't put it inside my hole!!:( It slides, what can I do?

Do you have to be in a particular position? Or is simply lying on your back OK?

>>1504272
Just burn yourself with fire maybe? Yeah, maybe lake of lava just to be sure to cleanse this shit idea from the earth.

>>1504272
Like this guy said >>1504280 dont do this. I fucked up and have a problem b ecause of it.

>>1504272
>How can I self fuck myself?,

Vote Trump.

>>1505056
kek. It'd be better if this thread was last year lmao.

>>1505056
savage

>>1504272
so this probably wont work if youre under 6" or so. I'm just a bit over 6" and its pretty hard for me, I have to hold it in or it pops out.

the trick is to start COMPLETELY flaccid, and make sure to warm up your asshole with a plug and/or dildo beforehand. your hole should be fairly loose and lubricated well.

don't lubricate your cock, otherwise it just slips everywhere. wipe off your asshole so that the exterior isn't slippery. push the head of your dick as far PAST your asshole as you can get it, and then try to pop the head in. with any luck the head will pop in, and you can clench your ass down around it. You'll get a semi-erection, and it will be hard enough to fuck yourself with. I cum in my own ass pretty frequently :)

Just got this for the first time. Holy shit.

>>1504362
kinks you know?

>>1504272
This only works if your dick is long enough to reach your asshole when it's 1/2 hard, otherwise it won't bend that way and it's useless to attempt.

It's impossible dont do it. And no. Im not not hung. Asses are too tight for wet noodles to be thrown down a hallway and i guess i get too hard. It hurts. Use an aneros. And dont break your cock in half. Bathmates. Holy grail of cum

>>1507590
Cock rings.

File: conjecturing.jpg (218KB, 760x596px) Image search: [Google]

218KB, 760x596px

Self-fucking? Meh. Call me when you do something innovative, like... http://oglaf.com/conjecturing

>>1507708
ahahaha i love oglaf

>>1507802
>he refuses to not draw foreskins
I like him too. Restore. Yesterday