If America is the modern day Rome, then what was Rome's Vietnam?

Judaea.

>>915828
France

>>915828
Caledonia

Th-The germans...they came outta the TREEEES maaaaaan

>>915835
Only they succeeded there...

Germanica?
Tactical victories, strategical defeat.

I just have this mental image of Roman legionaries smoking weed and blasting Hendrix out of a stereo system.

>>915861
DELETE THIS

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>>915842
this

>>915828
Parthia

>>915891
Parthia is more like Rome's China

>>915828
Spain

>>915853
Depends. Did Vietnam at least had some imperialistic intent from the U.S.?

>>915828
Scotland, kept trying to conquer it but never managed to.

>>915943
Arguable if we were fighting to instill our influence or just stop that of our rival empire.

Probably both though. We were real touchy about enemies being anywhere near our pet Japan.

>>915833
Definitely this.

>>915861
You in germania now bitches!

>forest ambushes
>tensions between italian troops, greek troops, gallic troops, and iberian troops
>slutty cave woman tier barbarian whores who promise to love you long time
>fighting in tunnels
>loli archer picking off survivors while they try to find her location
>centurion coming home from the war and screaming every night
>WE WERE JUST KIDS...WE DIDNT KNOW

>>915996
>I served in the 'Mania

>>915996
I'd watch this tbqh

I love the smell of greek fire in the morning.

>>915833
>>915968
they pacified judaea long before they started having any empire-wide troubles

>>915996
SOME FOLKS ARE BORN

>>915996
>quia non est mihi, starts playing in the background

>>916167
>I did my time
>On the Rhine


IT AIN'T ME I AIN'T NO SENATOR'S SON

Probably the Jugurthine war.

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>>916201

>>915838
This

>>915952
>Scotland
Do you mean calcedonia?

>>916204
Explain, too lazy to research

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>>916235
On second thought it's more like their Afghanistan.
Romans fruitlessly fight guerilla Berber nomads for years in the desert. Despite destroying several desert strongholds and settlements, they're no closer to victory. They had to bribe some of the noblemen to assassinate Jugurtha to score a diplomatic "victory".

>>916274
Damn. What was the 9/11 of Rome then?

>>915828
I've heard the Jugurthine Wars be compared to Vietnam. Dragged into a guerilla war with an enemy that constantly retreated back into rough terrain, giving the Roman legion nothing to lash out against.

>>916296
>implying Rome ever needed an excuse to go fuck someone up and try to conquer them

>>915828

Parthia or Germania.

Take your pick

>>916296

The entire fucking city burning to the ground during the reign of Nero?

Or the destruction of Pompeii?

Things like that must have genuinely seemed apocalyptic at the time.

What this guy said though >>916304

>>915833
That's more like Iraq

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>>916326
>What this guy said though
>>916304
>Hey check out this fig lmao it came from carthage lets go fuck em up!!

>>916326
>The entire fucking city burning to the ground during the reign of Nero?
I guess 9/11 really was an inside job.

>>916304
Yeah, they went to war with the Illyrians just because they felt they had been at peace too long.

>>915842
>>915853
Literally this.

>>916296
CANDLE OIL CANT MELT WOOD BUILDINGS

>>916296

First Gaulic Invasion.
Noricum being invaded in the Cymbrian War.
Hannibal being born.
That one time Mithradates III just up and killed a fuck ton of Roman citizens in anatolia.

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>>916415
>Hannibal being born.

>>916415

*Mithradates IV

my mistake.

>>916193
MADE TO WAVE THE AQUILA

>>916448
AND WHEN THE BAN PLAYS "AVE TO THE IMPERATOR"


THEY POINT THE BALLISTA TO YOU, JOVE

>>916172
I agree. This would be awesome.

>>916474
SOME LEGIONS ARE BORN GLADIUS AT HAND

JUPITER DON'T HELP THEMSELVES, NO

>>916474
QUOD NON ME QUOD NON ME

>>916487
BUT WHEN THE PUBLICAN COMES TO THE DOOR

JUPITER THE INSULAE LOOKS LIKE A SLAVE SALE, ETIAM

I SHOUTED OUT
WHO KILLED CAESAR

WHEN AFTER ALL, IT WAS YOU AND ME

>>916504
I AIN'T NO PATRICIAN'S SON, NO

>>915996
10/10

>it ain't memes starts playing

*Ride of the Vestals grows louder*

>>915905
Nice post Xi
Spratleys aren't islands.

BETTER RUN THROUGH THE TEUTOBURG

WHERE HAVE ALL THE LEGIONS GONE
LONG TIME PASSING
WHERE HAVE ALL THE LEGIONS GONE
LONG TIME AGO
WHERE HAVE ALL THE LEGIONS GONE
VARUS LOST THEM, EVERY ONE
WHEN WILL HE EVER LEARN
WHEN WILL HE EVER LEARN

>>915905
more like rome's russia.

>>915968
>>915833
>colonized and owned for hundreds of years
>whenever the Jews chimped out they got literally genocided so hard that in the 300s the Jews were a minority there
>this is considered comparable to Vietnam

It was Teutoburg for sure

>>915952
I thought they just kept us unconquered so politicians would have a nice safe place to gain military prestige

THERE WAS
A VILLA
IN LONDINIUM

THEY CALL THE RISING SUN

>>915996
goddamn that's real fucking good mate

>>916704
This

>>916296
Cannae?

>"Punic scum! Carthago delenda est!"

>>915861
>patrolling germanian forests
>non est me starts playing

>>915891
Parthia as the USSR to Rome's US. But then what does that make the Sassanids?

>>915828
What is America's Persia then?

>>915861
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f96p-IhcZhQ
>this scene
>nubian auxilliary screaming profanities in broke latin and shooting a ballista into the dark at a wounded teuton as firepots sporadically fly overhead into the treeline
>a drunken sagitarri named Blatta finishes the barbarian off with a single arced shot into the dark
>evocatus just wants to know who's in command

>>916905
The Persians.

>>915828
Armenia

>>916995
I dont think Iran is that powerful.

This thread is reddit-tier garbage

>>917008
They're powerful enough.

>>916905
Probably some tribe tribal confederation like the Sarmatians or Alans.

>>917018
The Sassanids were more of a threat to rome than modern day iran is to america

>>917028
I didnt know that Sarmatians are raiding the USA

>>917036
That's probably because you live on the East Coast.

>>917030
Yeah, I'm not contesting that considering the Sassanids won multiple wars with Rome/Byzantine and even the last 3 of 4 final ones. But current Iran is politically and militaristically a major regional power who have cucked American and Israeli as well as Pan-Arab attempts to get bomb or invaded for decades now.

Also Carter's career was ruined by Iran.

>>917047
we'll build a wall

>>916415
That was Mithradates VI I'm pretty sure. But either way, not a great example - that ended with the Romans wrecking his shit and Greece's in the process.

>>916435
Closer lol. The I is on the wrong side

>>916193
>>916448
>>916474
>>916487
>>916504
>>916526

I love you.

>>916715
maximum overkek

should have said sol invictus instead of rising sun tho

>>915861
>"quia non est mihi" starts playing

>>916274
>to assassinate Jugurtha
liar

you are a liar that makes things up

that's not what happened

you liar

>>917096
Shut up and keep quiet if you know what's good for you.

>>916905
This is the right answer. To think that any two empires are exactly the same is basic.

>>916180
They could see it coming though. And today, America can definitely see it coming.

>>916897
makes more sense given Armenian proxies

>>915842
yep

I think that Parthia managed to stay out of Roman control mainly because they were too poor and too far away to be worth conquering.

I cannot recall the names of any Parthian literary author. Their literary production was apparently not large and significant enough to be worth preserving in the eyes of the late ancients and early medievals.

>>915861
>during the opening of the movie "Finis" by Portae plays

>>917324
>literature
Maybe its all lost

>>916905
The Russians

>>917324

I think you need to read up on the history of the east instead of spouting bullshit you heard off /pol/ and trying to pass on your ignorance as fact

>>917345
Maybe when they were the Soviet Union, it's probably the Chinese now.

>>915861
>Where in the hell are you from anyways, Legionnaire?!
>Sir, Aegyptus, sir!
>Zeus' giant balls, Aeqyptus! Only camels and chariotfags come from Aegyptus, legionnaire! And you don't look like a camel to me, so that kind of narrows it down...

>>917356
Parthia emerged out of the Roman destruction of the Seleucids,the owed their existence and continued existence to Rome not being interested in desert wastelands

>>917451

its not even meme history since historian shares your views

>>917451
Romans simply couldn't finance an invasion and occupation of all the Parthian lands while keep the rest of the empire in good shape, plus it was probably nearly logistically impossible given the technological limits of the day.

I mean, why do you think Hadrian immediately gave up Trajan's Mesopotamian conquest? And that was just Mesopotamia.

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>be a roman soldier sent to Germania
>QUIA NON EST MIHI is played in the background

>>916766
That was Pearl Harbor, my man
>Yesterday, August 2nd, a day that shall live in infamy, the Republic of Rome was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the city state of Carthage

>>917465

"Parthia" was not one monolithic entity but a network of semi independent tributary states that paid homage to the "King of kings"

The conquest of Mesopotamia itself was a disaster. While Trajan did initially succeed in large part due to political instability in the East. It quickly turned into a guerilla war that Roman infantry based armies trying to establish supply lines over the desert were not suited to.

>>917483
You also might want to remember a large part of Trajan's success had to do with the Parthians being in a near civil war state. Also the Romans have never EVER made it into the Iranian plateau.

>>915828
The Parthians.

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>>917092
>having two emperors

>>916905
I would say India, given a generation.

>>917487
The Parthian state simply could not muster the arms in the fashion Rome did and hence its threat to Roman integrity always remained minimal.

Septimus Severus finally dealt the mortal blow to them with his military victories and gave Rome a new more defensible eastern border (annexing the northern Euphrates)

This paved the way for the more dynamic Sassanian dynasty.

>>917521
India has a VERY long way to go. Even Russia in it's current state is more of an issue and will be conceivably so for the future in, at the absolute very least, Eastern Europe, Central Asia, and the Arctic.

>>917521
haha, no.

>>917522
He never got past the hinterland territories and let's be real, the Arsacids were in decline since Surena's murder.

This thread is remarkable

>>916296
Pompeii
>lava can't ment stone walls

>>917521

>India 2030

>>916304
>m-muh defensive wars
>we conquered the known world by accident!
>we were just trying to protect ourselves!!!
>romana dinduna nothinga!

>>917721
>t-the sack of carthage is just a phoencian conspiracy!
>the numbers don't add up!

>>917736
Elephant dung can't melt alpine glaciers

>>917481
>fabian's army wasn't even at cannae!
>did the senate withhold crucial information on purpose?
>was it all a ploy to drag the roman people into a war they didn't want?

>>915828
Tanenburg or the Parths

>>917792
Teutoburg is what I meant shit

>>917797
good save. everyone knows the romans would have crushed imperial russia at tannenberg anyways.

>>917760
>was it all a ploy to drag the roman people into a war they didn't want?

This is actually very realistic and probably occurred historically.
The romans did see themselves as non-aggressive for the longest time, only fighting in self defense, so they had to be convinced they are in danger every time the legions marched.

>>916397
kek

>>917842
I dunno, surely the Romans would have known Hannibal was around LONG before Cannae, no?

>>917907
>so these guys whom we just fucking destroyed, took their island sand continental land, and they are paying us half our GDP in tribute, do you think they are a threat?
>no way, we rekt them when they were at their strongest, now they are weaker than they were then and we are stronger than we were, they have no chance

And thus Spain was left to the Barcas for a few decades.

>people think the US lost in Vietnam
Not even American but the American people wanted out. Even the Tet-Offensive was a Vietnamese defeat. Without the war crimes discussions in the background the US could have just start dropping nukes.
Also this is the MAJOR problem in OPs comparison. There were no media reporting what happened to the people and there wasn't anybody who wanted to chicken out of Germany and this is why they kept going (and dying) for centuries.

>>917913
They knew about Hannibal and they knew about Ibiria. Are you high? They just thought Hannibal was too slow to pose a thread but Hannibal ignored that the passage through the Alpes wasn't save yet and surprised the Romans.
At least this is what the sources tell us.

>>917928
They knew about him, and I never claimed otherwise.
However they thought he isnt a threat, like I did state.

They were like a lion ignoring a hyena while eating. It is there, it wants the meat, but it wont attack, because it cant win. So no reason to be on the defensive.

>>917931
>However they thought he isnt a threat, like I did state.
They thought he wasn't a threat because they thought they could muster an army fast and big to face him in Italy. They didn't think he wasn't a threat for the reasons you stated because they knew he was coming for them long before he even reached the Alps.

>>917324
You think the widespread destruction caused by the Arabs, Mongols, and Timurids didn't have something to do with that?

Hell, Persia had more people living in it in 1200 than it did in 1900.

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>>917913
>we invaded and radicalized them!
>did our own government funded [s]ISIS[/s] Hannibal?
>its not their fault!

>>917935
Are you going to deny that the general mood in Rome was:
>they can raise an army faster than him
>they can raise a bigger army than him
>their commanders are more capable than him
>each one of their soldiers was better than each one of his
>they can move into position before him and choose a battlefield that suits them
>they can better supply and replenish their force if one battle isnt decisive
>in fact they HOPED he'd attack so they can have an excuse to take more tribute from Carthage without ill consciousness

Basically they werent afraid of him at all, and werent in a defensive posture. I can imagine the senate meetings going through the Barca issue, then saying they'll raise an army next spring, and continuing to talk about grain imports or whatever. He wasnt considered a big deal, he was a small problem that will show up later and be handled with easily.

>>917946
Mate there is the thing called "sources". The senate tried to settle Saguntum diplomatically, they wanted the Carthaginian senate to extradite Hannibal to them. they sent a huge armada to prevent Hannibal from crossing the Rhone river, they tried to fuck up his supplies by attacking Spain etc.
All this is confirmed by Livy, Appian, Diodorus etc. Your stuff seems to be based on a flawed "cui-bono"-logic

>>917962
Those are all things done AFTER Hannibal became a threat. Not during the many years long process of him growing to that point.
Roman hubris allowed Hannibal to become dangerous.

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>>917946
>their commanders are more capable than him
>[18] The opinions of the consuls were diverse. Aemilius thought that it was best to exhaust Hannibal by delay, as he could not hold out long for want of provisions, rather than come to an engagement with a general so skilled in war and an army so accustomed to victory. But Varro, like the demagogue he was, reminded his colleague of the charge which the people had laid upon them at their departure, that they should bring matters to a speedy decision by battle. Servilius, the consul of the previous year, who was still present, alone sustained the opinion of Aemilius. All the senators and the knights who held offices in the army agreed with Varro.
http://www.livius.org/sources/content/appian/appian-war-against-hannibal/appian-war-against-hannibal-4/#19

>>917972
Prove it.

>>917977
This was AFTER their initial defeat.
I am clearly talking about BEFORE the campaign even started.

They thought he wont be an issue and didnt prepare for him.

>>917982
Fucking prove it. They are only shitty sources for this period. Even the content of the Ebro treaty is unknown.

>>917982
I thought it was that they felt they had more time to prepare since they thought there was no chance Hannibal would cross the Alps in the winter.

>they didn't know elephant fuel melts dank alps

>>918004
It is. This is what the sources tell us.
>>917982
What initial defeat? This chapter is called "Hannibal crosses the Alps"

>>915833
no,https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bar_Kokhba_revolt

>>917694

lava didn't flow through the streets of pompeii, stop watching shitty movies

source: I've been in pompeii

>quia non est mihi starts playing

>>918109
>Pyroclastic flow

>>918112
Pyroclastic flow is not lava.

>>918202
What the fuck who the fuck is Adam Booth I didn't write that shit

>>918206
Cool your tits, Meghan.

>>918209
I'm not Meghan, Kendra.

>>918215
I liked you better when you were. Meghan is a sexy name.

>>918221
I don't like where this is going.

>>918221
> liking variation of Meghara

Spain. Crap generals, ambushes with pointy javelins up your ass, forests and swamps, high chance of death, etc

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>>918238

>>918240
>>918245
> no armour
>helmets look gay as fuck

MEME WARRIORS, DESU.

>>918292
They were the premier mercenaries of their day. Rome sustained like 500,000 dead or wounded in their conquest of Hispania.

>>918310

>Rome sustained like 500,000 dead or wounded in their conquest of Hispania.

We were talking about iberian battles, not celtic and cartaginian battles.

Also -Proofs, nigger. 500.000 men is the equivalent of 96 roman legions.You are telling me that Rome lost that many men fighting shitstained iberians?In a period little under a century?

>premier mercenaries of their day

Pro-tip. They weren't.

>>918334
Look up the Sertorian war.

>>915943
I suppose it's possible to compare the Roman fear of further Germanic invasions into Roman territory to the US fear of the domino effect.
Just as the Romans had suffered from Germanic invasions the US has seen a lot of east Asian countries turn Communist.

>>918364
>Sertorian war.
> a civil war, but what the hell
>no more than 50.000 soldiers involved
>500.000 casualties.

Seems legit, desu.

>>917324
That's because the Sassanids destroyed most of their official records, written, inscribed, or made with reliefs one Ardashir ascended to power and killed Atrabanus. Also, majority of singing and poetry traditions in modern Iran have been around since the early Arsacid/Parthian dynasty's reign.

>>917939
>Hell, Persia had more people living in it in 1200 than it did in 1900.
That's not true.

>>917919
>the American people wanted out.
losing heart IS losing the war, stupid. The Vietnamese fucked their "we world policeman now" shit right up, and you know it.
(then they went next door and fixed the fuck-up they created in Cambodia).
>We wuz jungle warriors!
lol. no!

>non est ego starts playing

>>916296

Kitos War

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>>918621

>>916905
FUCKING CHINA
>Eternal East vs West

Ruthenia delenda est

>>917842
The samnite war was pretty much this

>we capua now

>>916780
I have the urge to translate that song now

>>917441
> Zeus

>>918978
>Jupiter?! You aren't buying into the PC government bullshit, are you legionnaire?!

>>915996
>Full Metal Lorica

>>919330
>Apocalypsi Nunc
>I love the smell of latrines in the morning.

>>915828
>America
>Modern day Rome

>>915828
Definitely Germania

>>915828
Caledonia.

>>919430
Caledonia would the modern day Afghanistan war. Poor, militant, far the fuck away, and just not worth the cost of sending a big army to truly pacify it.

>>916984
Fucking GOAT scene in any film ever. I remember watching it for the first time when I was 13 and it scared the shit out of me more than any horror film has ever done.

>>917345
This. Old rivals from the East.

And Britain = Greece. Hugely influential on American culture, greatest empire at the time until it became partitioned, revolutionised art, literature, poetry, science, etc.

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>>915828
It's definitely Armenia. They had to fight a clusterfuck of a war against Persia and it totally didn't pay off.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_Armenia

>>918962
do it erensto, we need more roman memes

>>915861
>in Teutobourg Forest
>it ain't me starts playing

>>915828
Dacia.

After fighting for it the Romans eventually left, proclaiming mission accomplished. It was then swiftly absorbed by their enemies.

>>915861
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_JVaMuZZBQ&feature=youtu.be

>>920334

Wrong

Dacia was a Roman province until 271 when it was abandoned by Aurelian due to the fact that the gold, silver and iron mines ran out and it simply wasn't a defensible position.

NON EST MIHI
NON EST MIHI
NON SENATOREM FILIUS SUM

>>919910
>These are great days we're living, amici. We are jolly green titans, walking the oikoumene with gladii. These barbaroi we wasted here today are the finest human beings we will ever know. After we rotate back to the world, we're gonna miss not having anyone around that's worth stabbing.

>>920365
I know the history. It wasn't a defensible position, no, but it sure as hell wasn't merely on that basis. I don't believe the mines had been completely exhausted. The major issue with that it was completely indefensible because of the tribes on either side of the salient, e.g. the Roxolani, Iazyges and the later groups that moved in.

But you're using the same logic as Vietnam. It's still considered a failure amongst your own people and your enemies if you eventually pull out even if not by historians millenia later. Evacuating any province was considered a stain on Roman honour, Hadrian was shat on for it by various writers.

Vast numbers of troops were stationed on the Danube and in the forts beyond the frontier both in the barbaricum and in Dacia itself until they were withdrawn.

>>920385

107-275 is not an immediate withdraw you stupid cow

>>920397
>what is exaggeration for effect

Have you even been on this website before? Does my post suggest that i'm some sort of retard or are you just projecting?

>>920354
>blocked in germany

kek

>>916296

Judaen Zealots=Rome's ISIS

>>915861
Kek

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>>915828

Is Trump America's Crassus?

>>920471
>what do you mean you hate all jews, antoninus?
>not all jews antoninus!

>>920547
Not near as rich, but the closest the Americans will get. Will he personally lead an army into Mexico?

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>>920548

>"YOU'RE A MALE OF ROME"
>"Oy vey! We jews are a peaceful people! I bet you goyim haven't even read the Torah."
>"COME ON POPULI, it's 66AD, check your Latin privilege. It's not their fault they only have one god."
>"Literally Vespasian"

>>917324
Well, hmm, I wonder, just WONDER if a huge religious movement that reformatted the political structure of the Post-Roman Middle East, leading to an Islamic Golden age, which was then followed by a massive invading horse culture burning, raping, and pillaging so hard that they fucked up the civilization of the mid-east till the Industrial Revolution had something to do with that.

I mean, really, anon. THINGS GET LOST.

>>915828
Does that make Bulldog Mattis our version of Augustus?

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>>920582

After he makes sure they've got no where else to run.

>>915828
Germania hands down.
>Germanian war drags on, and on with little ground gained by the Romans.
>Vietnam drags on and on, with little ground gained by US.
>Roman's suffer heavy logistics issues
>America suffers heavy logistic issues
>Germans strike behind lines
>Vietnamese strike behind lines
>Germania is never conquored and Romans eventually pull out
>Vietnam is never fully taken, and the US pulls out.

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>>915996
There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on barbarians, judaeu, Iberians or gaelic. Here you are all equally nequam.

>>920471
More like the Bar Kokhba revolt.

literally a "Jewish State" being resurrected out of nowhere by a self-styled messiah

>>919687
I bet they genocided the Armenians too.

>>920599
>Is that Greek dress you are wearing Anontininus? That's imperial appropriation!

>>920660
>quia non est mihi starts playing
>it ain't me starts playing

What was Romes Canada?

>>921367
Hibernia. Cold, inhospitable, not worth conquering.

Were the Germanians Rome's version of Mexicans?

>>915828
Spain. Conquering it fully took centuries of effort, and men fucking dread assignment there, being forced to contend with people who could lay ambushes with entire armies and fade into the hills with ease.

>Roman kingdom
>US belonged to a kingdom

>Roman republic
>US became a republic

>Roman empire
>...?

People believe the US is gonna become shitty, little do they know, we are about to become based for once.

>>920354
I just started watching Rome and pissed myself at this.

>>921735
>Roman Empire
>US becomes an empire

>Fringe religious movement, Christianity, takes over the Roman Empire
>Fringe religious movement, Scientology, takes over the US

>>915828
Armenia

>>921981
Atheism is a fringe "religion"

>>922001
It is nowhere near as organized as early Christianity was though. Scientology is much more so, and much more menacing. Militant atheists and their fedoras are usually laughed out of the room or at least eye-rolled into shame.

>>917481
trasimene tho
>"They came outta nowhere!"

>>918621
>>920354
>>920767

It's called FORTUNAN FILLI, matula!

>>922014
kek, this reminds me of that time some atheists decided to found an "atheist church," with the aim of replicating the positive social/psychological effects of a religious gathering in a non-theistic setting.

Without about three months or so, they had splintered into at least two groups, all the groups bickering amongst each other about not being sufficiently godless.

Atheists will never amount to shit as a group.

>>922027
>Without about three months or so, they had splintered into at least two groups, all the groups bickering amongst each other
I see they've managed to successfully simulate the start of Christianity.

>>922014
>some meme celebrity cult that's height was in the mid-2000's
>being anywhere near early christianity

>>922045
>implying early christianity wasn't a meme religion for its first 100 years
>implying mementology can't infiltrate the government
>being this non-roman

>>915828
The Middle East itself

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There are three things a legionary
must do in his lifetime.
Fight,
Die, and get drunk.
But by Jove I'll Crawl home
like a Roman.

>>922079
Pretty sure that was one of the richest parts of their empire, not some money sink like nam was.

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“We were children of the 10s BC and Germanicus Caesar's young stalwarts of the early 10's AD. He told the world that Romans would "pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship" in the defense of freedom. We were the down payment on that costly contract, but the man who signed it was not there when we fulfilled his promise. Germanicus Caesar waited for us on a hill in Campus Martius, and in time we came by the thousands to fill those slopes with out white marble markers and to ask on the murmur of the wind if that was truely the future he had envisioned for us.”

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>>915828
ARMINIUUUUUUUUUUUUUS!!!

>>922035
Top kek.

>Every minute I stay in this castra, I get weaker, and every minute Arminius squats in the forest, he gets stronger

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“I’ve seen a lot of stuff… maybe I’ve seen too much. I see most humans in a bad light because I’ve seen what they can do, how evil they can be… I’ve seen the Gallic Holocaust and I’ve seen Masada , I’ve seen the Germanic War and I’ve seen Carthage… I’ve seen the Pompeii disaster… I’ve seen the Palatine hills fire… I’ve been alive too long, over a hundred years is a long time to be alive,” Decimus sighed, staring at the posca he was holding.”

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>>922168
>the horror.....the horror.

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“The Romans won't win. They're not fighting for their homeland. They just want to be good. In order to be good, they just have to fight awhile and then leave.”

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>You'd better flush out your head, pedes. This isn't about pax romana; this is a slaughter. If I'm gonna get my balls blown off for a word, my word is "cunnus".

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You can kill ten of my men for every one I kill of yours,
but even at those odds, you will lose and I will win.

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>Varus, see this? This is this. This ain't something else. This is this. From now on, you're on your own.

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Tell the Germani they’ve got to draw in their horns or we’re going to catapult them back into the Stone Age.

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Too young for Gallia, too old for Germania.

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>We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in Germania Superior, we shall fight on the seas and rivers, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength on horseback, we shall defend our empire, whatever the cost may be.

A-T-H-E-N-I-A

ATHENIA

>>915828
Parthia and Persia Tbh. They cucked the Romans and used the king as a stepping ladder on to the Parthian king's horse. That is figuratively Vietnam. A complete waste.

>>922297
not true, not a complete waste, got good music out of it. including the hit single "quia non est mihi"

https://youtu.be/M_JVaMuZZBQ

>>921735
>we are about to become based for once
hahaha

>>922035
Despite their crying I don't think atheists have the same threshold for being made martyrs, unless it is being made a self-made martyr.

>>920354
>legionary, why do you have born to kill on your helmet and a peace button on your lorica?

>>915861
>I'm gonna walk here around in a circle
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQ7jHHC2bvg
4:45 if you want to get right to it

>>922395
/his/ needs to stream this film, holy fuck

>rolling papyrus

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>>922398
>Do you care if it falls?
"What?"
>The Roman Empire?
"Fuck it!"

Mel Brooks has to be in the running for most based jew of all time
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZegQYgygdw

>>921707

Yes. There are many references by Roman authors of Germanic laziness.

>>922420
Really? What did they say?

>>915828
>America is mordern day Rome
Kill yourself my man

>>919290
>PC
>Plebian Correctness
seems about right

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>>922268
>born too late to conquer Gallia, born too early to conquer Germania, born just in times to shit in Pompeii

>>915828
Themselves. The greatest destruction in Roman history was caused by Romans fighting Romans.

epic thread

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>>923201
>Romans destroyed themselves.Maybe in some twisted idea of ineptness, but it was Germans that actually killed it

>The immune, the one they called Chef, was from Gaul. He was wrapped too tight for Magna Germania; probably wrapped too tight for Gaul. Lance, on the forward ballistas, was a famous wrestler from the beaches south of Pompeii. One look at him and you wouldn't believe he ever held a gladius in his whole life. Mundus... Magister Mundus... was from some Nubian shithole and the light and space of Magna Germania really put the zap on his head. Then there was Phillipus, the Centurion. It might have been my mission, but by Jupiter it was the Centurion's cohors alaria!

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>>917324

The Romans never attempted to conquer the Iran plateu after carrhae. It was always considered a fools errant to conquer such an arid land occupied by such a hardened tribe of nomadic horse archer warriors. It wasn't that Iran wasn't valuable, hell don't forget that the silk trade road from India passed from Persia to the Mediterranean.

The Romans waged war against Persia to keep them from expanding beyond Armenia, thus Armenia was seen as the final frontier for Roman power, since it protected two of Romes most valuable eastern provinces, Mesopotamia, Syria and Egypt. The irony is that even when the Romans absolutely devastated and wrecked the Parthians during Trajan's war against Parthia, they never considered holding that territory down since they natives were so hostile to them, therefore it is safe to conclude that all campaigns against the Persians from Marc Antony's campaign to the Heraclian war, had the purpose of checking their power and expansion, not occupying Iran.

>>923675
I thought Trajan wanted to keep that land but died before he could consolidate it, after which Hadrian saw the writing on the wall and packed up and left.

>>922179
Huehuehue

>>922238
Okay this one is great

>>922398
Fuck that. We should stream an actually historic film.

>>923598
10/10

>>915828
Germania

>>922133
is this the album that quia non est mini is on?

is this thread the vietnam of rome threads? bogged down in memes, there is no victory to be had.

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>he's obsessed with roman history
>the romans were such noble people

>>923724
His forces were pulling out, and after he got ill, the Arsacid dynasty engaged in hostilities. Romans lost a shit ton of men pulling OUT from Parthia.

>>924444
Can't disagree with the quads. Still even if they lost a ton of men pulling out, it was probably better than trying to stay there for the long haul.

>>924319
t. krautikus germanikus

>>915828
Teutoberg forest

The Parthians were nothing to Rome. Rome won most of the wars they fought, while sending only a finger of their strength over to fight in said wars.

The only war Parthia won was the first one. Then Rome adapted.

>>915861
Some Romans are born made to wave the aquilla,
Ooh, they're red, gold and citizens.
And when the band plays "Ave Caesar",
Ooh, they point the ballista at you, Jupiter,

It ain't , it ain't me, I ain't no senator's son, son.
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no patrician, no.

Yeah!
Some folks are born gladdius in hand,
Jupiter, don't they help themselves, oh.
But when the Publican comes to the door,
Lord, the estate looks like a rummage sale, yes,

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no emperor’s son, no.
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no patrician, no.

Some folks inherit rich villas,
Ooh, they send you down to conquest, Mars,
And when you ask them, "How much should we give?"
Ooh, they only answer More! more! more! yoh,

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no military son, son.
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no patrician, no.

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no patrician, no no no,
It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no senator, no no no,

>>915828
This is quite a vague question, but I'm going to interpret it as follows. Vietnam is not by any means my area of expertise, but I think it can be defined as a collective cultural trauma in the United States of America. While comparisons like this often lead to anachronismic faults, the question wether Rome has or hasn't gone trough a similarly impactful trauma is an interesting one.
One collective Roman trauma I would call greatly impactful in a military sense, are the wars of the Romans against the Germanic Cimbri and Teutones (113-101). In particular the Battle of Arausio (Orange), where the Romans suffered defeat, has been increasingly impactful in the years to come. It is often said that these events eventually led to the Roman tumultus (a state of crisis).
The Battle of the Teutoborg (9 CE) forest needs to be mentioned here as well, at is if often credited as being one of the most impactful collective traumas of the Roman Empire. It was literally named the 'Varian Disaster (Clades Variana)' by various Roman historians.
It is quite difficult to say wether the impact of these events 'match' the impact Vietnam has had on American culture, but it most likely changed the decisionmaking of the Roman Empire when it came to going to war - much like the impact the Vietnam loss had on the United States.
Sources:
Tacitus, Annals IV.66
B. Kerremans, Metus Gallicus, tumultus Cimbricus? The possible promulgation of a tumultus in the Cimbrian War.
Velleius 2,118.

>>926771
from reddit

>>917521
Poo in lol, Pajeet.

who was romes Cuba ?

>>915828
I can't quite think of an equivilant.

But really it depends what you define Vietnam as.

If you are looking for an extremely divisive war, fought for uncertain purposes, which militarily ended only in embarrassing failure, creating a creditability gap, opening up traditional American values for scrutiny, and an overall discrediting of institutions never before questioned (Military service, American equality, rich vs poor divide), then no such war exsists.


If you mean run of the mill military defeat, which whilst embarrassing was ultimately nothing more then a setback, then Roman history is stuffed with them.

fucking goth fucking shits

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>>915996
>>920690

>>928591
roman armenia

>>915833

This for awhile.

Also Dacia was way more trouble than it was ever worth.

>>930295
Might have been worth it if they got those two chunks of land on either side of Dacia as well, didn't look too defensible as it was.

>>916905
China, or the USSR.

>>916780
>>917092
>>919910

Flawless. roma invicta/x

>>915952
>kept trying to conquer
They didnt try to conquer, who the Hell would want Scotland

>there will never be another Hollywood big budget Rome film
Feels to great for any mortal man

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>>915828
What is Rome's Donald Trump?
Nero?

>>921981
Wait until 2033. We are gonna have a martyr. Any important boy born between 2000 to 2003?

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>>936064
Caesar was a populist

>>916201
Utmostkek

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>>915952

>>917011
You sound like a barrel of laughs m8

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>>936114
But Caesar wasn't a piece of Capitalist shit.
Caesar was a war hero.
Trump does real estate.

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>>936166
just wait for it man

>>936166
This image is the most terrifying thing I've ever seen

delete this

>>936166
eh you gotta look at how romans and americans view success and power

Romans saw military success as the greatest virtue

Americans building businesses and making money

>>936064
Crassus

>>936215
kek

this actually, I take calling him Caesar back

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>>936173
Don't flash this shit again anon

>>936228
It makes doesn't it? Both were wealthy men, both ride populist movements to political power, both are extremely unprepared for what their getting themselves into.

In before Trump tries to invade Russia.

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Does this mean Trump will be assassinated?
>Yes

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Wait a minute....
>Donald Trump is like Caesar
>GOP is the Roman Senate
Need Proof Anon?
GOP is a group of cranky old men.
Ted Cruz is Cicero.

>>936283
>Et tu, Carson?
>Dies

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>>936105
>speaks in esoteric nonsense
>outspoken in a way that turns the wrong heads
>the hero we need

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>>936328
When Cruz bashes someone's shit so hard his name becomes the synonym for evil baby eating monster for the next 2000 yeras, call me.

>>915828
If America is modern day Rome does that mean we'll soon have another Messiah?

>>939664
He is already the zodiac killer though

>>922001
more like SJWism

>>939704
>implying the messiah isnt already here

>>939766
L. Ron Hubbard?

Who were Rome's communisds?

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>>939830

>>940338
I don't think you quite grasp the concept of a Messiah

>>940335
The christians?

>>936251
Russia will either be our Gaul or Parthia, this will decide between Caesar and Crassus.