Meanwhile, in Roman /his/...

sup pater familias, et tu be honest?

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>>36272

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>Watching legionnaires in cisalpine Gaul
>Non Est Me starts playing

>be me
>walking down street
>Fucking plebs doing nothing but being plebs
>Try ignoring them and continue walking
>See recognizable faces in the distance
>NotThisShitAgain.exe
>Motherfucking dindu nuffin cum skins group of barbarians immigrants walking towards me
>Even through I'm the most powerful man in the city, can't do shit because the emperor wants "Multiculturalism"
>Trying to look for alternative roots to go for
>NoEscape.png
>Accelerate walking pace to get this over with
>can hear them speaking in the heretic language
> "Shwüzi Shwüzi Füthor Füthor"
>Absolutely disgusting
>Manage to get pass them without getting an axe between my eyes

Why is this shit allowed?
I'm really starting to think that the whole conspiracy theory that the greeks control the emperor is true.

>>36420
topkek

>>36353
>Celebrati prohibitae

[spoiler]How off was my translation[/spoiler]

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>mfw the senator asked me to kek him with his wife

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>>36228
Some of you plebs are alright, don't go into the Teutoburg Forest tomorrow.

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>tfw you will never sack Rome with your bros and impregnate all the plump Italian qts with your superior barbarian seed

>>36914
honorius you fuckstick you caused this shit to happen with your retarded obsession with chickens

god damn you honorius

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>>36831
Women are overrated my friend. True bonds lie within the folds of a boy

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Xuanzang

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Whats going on on this continent?

Hey guys going to pompeii this weekend to visit their brothels haha thinking about witty thing to write on their walls after fuggin! Any ideas?

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>>38288

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>>36681
Stay mad, Latin.

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Rome a shit. Assyria for life.

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>be me walking down the paved dirt road
>nothing much just thinking about our praised emporer and how I would let my wife sex him if had to
>tfw see germanic swine
>ew
>they are crying as they had just lost their baby
>take our my sword
>"in the name of our emporer, you have the right to remain silent"
>cuts head off of male
>takes female as concubine
>another day in imperial rome

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[spoiler]romans?[/spoiler]

>>39040
Yeah.

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little parthian? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my disciplina agro in the Legio X Macedonica, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret skrimishes on Marcomannii, and I have over CCC confirmed kills. I am trained in testudo formationem and I’m the top legionarus in the entire plumbatarii milites. You are nothing to me but just another Caledonian. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this senatorial province, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the forum? Think again, barbarus. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of batavians across the Belgae and your tabernae is being traced right now so you better prepare for the pilum volley, phoenician. The volley that wipes out the barbarian little thing you call your fort. You’re fucking dead, dacian. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over DCC ways, and that’s just with my bare scutum. Not only am I extensively trained in pancratium, but I have access to the entire loricae of the I Cohortum Italicum and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable vicus off the face of the Mundus, you little parthian. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” forum tabula was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking lingua. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the denarii, you goddamn Rhine swine. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking romanised, foederati.

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This guy is gonna be a GOAT leader. I can tell.

Heri futui puellam.

Ceterum autem censeo carthaginem delendam esse

Why the fuck did Claudius allow these Ginger Gaul fucks in the senate. the fuckers sound like they are gargling dick when they speak and one looked at me quite harshly the other day.

>tfw I got kicked out of the Senate for seducing my neighbor's son
How do I get back in? I don't want to go back to being a Quaestor.

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>>40869
>tfw men die and they are not happy

>>40834
Latin translation desperately required.

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>tfw garrisoned in Brigantia.

Stuck on this fucking wall having to deal with Brittunculi . Wish my mum would send me some more socks

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>>36681
>yfw this was actually plausible
>yfw it was the praetorians and the german body auxillaries all along

>>36228
Crucify the Carthaginians, Punic war now!

>>36353
No, on a history board he is correct.

Objective and Factual list of the top three worst human beings in history:

3. Arminius
2. Lucius Tarquinius Superbus
1. Hannibal Barca

Any dispute for this list should be taken up with your local censor.

>>36228
Hey who took away all the color from our buildings in this painting!

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>>36420
Holy fuck

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>41104
Thanks for nothing, Google.

Quid enim tibi stupri irrumabo dicunt animae meae Parthorum parum? Da mihi sis crustum tu scis quia lectus verticem meum in agro disciplina Macedonica Legio X, quod Ive 'been involved in abscondito skrimishes on Marcomannii multus, et super CCC confirmata necat. Ego erudivi formationem in testudinem glomerabantur, et Im 'in summitate legionarus totius plumbatarii milites. Vos estis ex nihilo ad me sed iustus alius Caledonius. Tempus et delebo te accurate antea visi similia quae ex senatus provinciam verbis meis adtende stupri. Uideri possit cum stercore quod mhi forum Atqui putate, barbarus. Dum loquimur sum contingentes arcanum meum retis Batavi miscere ictus trans Belgae et investigari tabernae est vox iam sic te melius praeparare ad pilum NUBES Phoenissa. NUBES dicis quod exstinguit barbarorum modico praesidio. Tu fucking mortuis Daciano inclusa. Possim usquam quisquam, nec possum in DCC percutiamque vos dirigat et ultricies nuda scutum. Non sum admodum exercitatum pancratium autem aditus ad te universus loricas Cohortum Italicum et illam miseram vicus facie sua amplitudine, et extergere Mundus, parum institutus. Utinam potuisset scire nefas retributionem vestram "ingeniosi" forum erat tabula tollere vos fortasse lingua habuissent vestri stupri. Sed non potuerunt, non iam debeo tibi denarios te Rhenum malique porcorum. Ego cacas furor super omnes, et in vobis erit obruent eam. Tu fucking Romanised, foederati.

Go back to /carthage/

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>>36272
Come say that to me on /tg/ not /his/ and see what happens.

>>41979
Barbar slave, what do?

>>41943
>tree growing out of your helmet
What kind of barbarian shit is this?

>>38756
Why does the bottle he is holding have the zorastrian symbol on it?

Vote for Bernie Claudius my friends, he will make us Gauls citizens too ! We will be able to go to Italy legualy and work there, maybe we could even succeed and become part of teh senate.

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CDXX ARDERE ID HOMOAMATOR.

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tfw you'll never have sick bants like the greeks

>>42288
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Lix-ajZ4Sk reminds me of this

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>>42888
nice trips tho

>>42076
the kind that probably never existed

>>43029
>not liking anything made by brad neely
I can understand having a different opinion about politics but hating on brad neely I will not have, he's a treasure

>>43282
Brad neely is even /his/ related
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7iVsdRbhnc

>>36228
Do yov know who bvilt this city? Wasn't here yesterday.

>>43356
Great representation, explains the current state of crybaby threads accurately.

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TRIARII

>>44235
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chPRYXS0YZI

What the fvck did yov jvst fvcking say about me, yov little plebian? I’ll have yov know I graduated top of my class in the gladiators, and I’ve been involved in nvmerous secret raids on the Visigoths, and I have over CCC confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top hoplite in the entire Imperial forces. Yov are nothing to me bvt just another target. I will wipe you the fvck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this sphere, mark my fvcking words. Yov think yov can get away with saying that shit to me at the Senate? Think again, fvcker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the city and a bust of your face is being scvlpted right now so yov better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes ovt the pathetic little thing yov call yovr life. You’re fvcking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill yov in over DCC ways, and that’s jvst with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in vnarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the City of Rome Coliseum and I will vse it to its fvll extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the Empire, yov little shit. If only yov covld have known what vnholy retribution yovr little “clever” comment was abovt to bring down vpon yov, maybe yov wovld have held yovr fvcking tongve. Bvt yov covldn’t, yov didn’t, and now yov’re paying the price, yov goddamn idiot. I will shit fvry all over yov and yov will drown in it. Yov’re fvcking dead, kiddo.

>>44235
IMPERATOR

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>>36228
sum of tu plebeians are alright, don't go to the hippodrome in Constantinople on January 13, 532

>>44235
URBAN COHORT

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>>44386
I'm in fucking tears m8

>>46325
Cur?

>>36228

AVE

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>>48566
TRUE TO CAESAR

>>36420
>Watching Sophocles's Antigone at the ampitheatre
>A fucking Nubian is playing Creon
This needs to stop

I screwed the barmaid

>>50897
VI.14.20 (House of OP); 4523: I have buggered men

Who thinks Ancus Marcius is gonna be a little bitch like his grandfather?

Paedicavi homines