/his/ humour thread

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>>2940082

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>>2940129
>post yfw you realise all the attacks on the french were secretly orchestrated by Lindy

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>>2940179

>>2940090
fuck off leftypol

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>>2940202

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>>2940234
kek

>>2940266
nooice

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>>2940265
>covers cost by selling eyes

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oc

>>2940227
I like this one. Most sci-fi universes are an Ancap's wet dream.

>>2940325
Star Trek isn't

>>2940279
the gif describes me after seeing the filename

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>>2940082

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>>2940458
(Hint: DO IT AGAIN)

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>>2940462

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>>2940465

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>>2940471

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any more of these?

A Vandal magister with known Arian tendencies was holding a symposium in honour of Demophilus, a known schismatic.
"Before the toasts begin, you must get on your knees and worship God and accept that he was the most divine entity the ecumene has ever known, even greater than Christus whom he created!"

At this moment, a venerable Praepositus Limitis who had served on the frontiers for decades and understood the necessity of taming the Barbaricum and fully supported the creed promulgated by the great Constantinus rose from his couch and held up a crucifix.

"Who does this represent?"

The Rhenian cur smirked quite devilishly and smugly replied "the created child of an indivisible God"

"You miss the point. Jesus Christ our Dominus is of the same substance as God and thus equal to Him."

The heretic was visibly shaken, and dropped his wine krater and copy of Eusebius' Onomastikon. He stormed out of the banquet hall crying those laetus crocodile tears. The same tears Donatists and Priscillians cry for the "poor" (who today are so holy that saints vie to kiss their feet) as they flee Roman territory to the outrage-committing Bacaudae in Armorica. There is no doubt that at this point the "learned" Vandal wished he had studied the work of the Holy Apostles and become more than a ludicrous teacher of rhetoric. He wished so much that he had a spatha to disembowel himself with due to the shame but he had sold all the city's arms for Gaiseric's ransom pay!

The partygoers politely clapped and all ceased their apostasy that day and accepted Jesus as the true Son of God. An divine light suddenly shone into the room and blazed upon the bust of Augustine and the statue wept miraculously. The Nicene Creed was recited, and Jesus Monogenes himself descended and banished the barbarians to the hellish wastes beyond the limes.

The magister lost his tongue and was castrated the following day. He was exiled to Troesmis, far from from God's Light.

Praise Jesus Consubstantialis.

>>2940202
Makes me laugh every time.

>>2940338
This. Bunch of commie bullshit that frankly triggers me.

>>2940858
Star Trek is a parable about how universal abundance will lead to a decline in martial virtue, until such time as the society declines and is destroyed from without.

>>2940458
Tfw by burning us to the ground he saved us from the hordes of foreign immigrants which took over the north east and therefore enabled us to maintain our aristocratic society in a 'true' form.

>>2940544
>Semper Tyrannis which is Latin for "I consider that Carthage must be destroyed"
Hearty kek

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Did someone say OC?

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>>2940935
More

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>>2940082

This one works well on /pol/ too

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>>2940082

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>>2940994

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>>2941020

>>2940279
And i thought in /his / i would escape our memes.

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>>2940987

And this one works well on /int/ but can be used against IRA sympathising West Brits here, too.

>>2940935
back to facebook/reddit with you

>>2940252
Is that an actual book?

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>>2940273
can someone make this with alexander and Cyrus the great?

>>2941247
>Average russian history textbook

>>2940239
Post more like these

>>2941247
Anyone read "Salt" by Mark Kurlansky. Its actually very interesting.

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>>2940179
Leave Lindy to me

>>2940227
It's fucking perfect

>>2941314
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CApiU7kvgB8
Will Lindy ever recover?

>>2941446
He'll just deny it ever happened, like Zama

bye rddit

>>2940090
You wish lele

>>2940935
I've seen this around months ago and didn't find it funny then. It doesn't get funnier if you claim it to be your oc

>>2940090
Tbh, i was an edgy nazbol as a kid.

>>2940090
Someone butthurt that his Hirtler thread is not treaten seriously.

>>2940651
I feel like this is hilarious but I only understood around half of it

>>2940858
But why tho? It's the future

This thread is shit

>>2940082
Why would you need manacles in the Congo?

>>2940279
Holy shit, what is this from?

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>>2940198
>>2942456
>not recognizing old memes
>confused about what the term "humour" means
summer has come

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>>2942548
George of the Jungle

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>>2941278

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>>2940987

>>2942648
Where is the joke?

>>2942648
lost

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>>2942536
I appreciate your efforts to improve it

>>2941000
10/10

>>2942503
LOOKS ABSOLUTLY PERFECT.

t.French.

>>2942963
Has someone got the template for this?

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>>2942953
This would be more entertaining if there were example quotes on all of them.

>>2940280
Thats what Jihad is desu

>>2943325
Fucking Novgorodians, leave the Finns alone already!

>>2940090
this desu

>>2942898
>uses "fascist" against all non-lefties

>>2942647

kek

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>>2940401

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>>2944631

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>>2944633

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>>2944635

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>>2944643

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>>2944651

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>>2944654

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>>2944660

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>ebin hyper war autism

>>2944730
Say what you want - I fucking love it anyway

>>2944769
I want full literature on the War. It's criminal that the biggest war in history is so forgotten.

>>2942963
Finland, at least western Finland, is swedish.
t. Swede

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Bumping before bed.

>>2944730
>disgusted cat
That's a scheming cat you assburger

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What ever happened to crusader-posting?

>>2944769
me too.

>>2940311
>T. Libcuck

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>>2942618
Here here

>>2942963
Change Novgorod to Tokyo, add something about being split in two, and change "White privilege" to "good geographic placement" or some shit and you have South Korea

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>>2944895
god my sides

>>2940239
This is great

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>>2944875
Well we can fix that.

>>2945729
>Leave the Italians to me

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>>2940265
>Prince Jovan Vladimir declared 29 of June to be a national holiday in Serbia

>>2940223
Too long

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Hot off the presses.

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>>2945978
ancap is the purest ideology

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>>2940202
>still Germans east of the Elbe

the real joke

>>2944895
kek

>>2940475
this is proof modern Greeks are the continuers of the Byzantine empire

>>2940651
>I miss this pasta

A liberal professor and known rabble-rouser was holding a lecture on Reason and Rationality.

"Before this class begins, you must stand and pronounce that there is no God, as no theory grounded in EMPIRICAL EVIDENCE and SCIENTIFIC FACT can prove his existence!"

At this moment, a young man of high birth and rank whose family name was known to all refused to rise.

"If there is no God, then why do some men rule over others?"

The atheist academic smirked philosophically and smugly replied "because they posses then necessary qualities of knowledge and power to do so."

"and where would those qualities come from if not by God's grace? surely there is no substance, no quantifiable element that ensures the dominance of some men over others...our savior Jesus Christ was a lord in the Kingdom of God, was he not?"

The republican was visibly shaken, and dropped his spectacles and a copy of John Locke's "A Letter Concerning Toleration." He stormed out of the auditorium crying those human tears: the same tears serfs cry when they are whipped by their master's children. There is no doubt at this point the "enlightened" liberal wished he had studied theology and became a monk. He wished so much that he had a soul to save, but he had deduced that humans have no soul that can be studied and examined!

The pupils politely clapped and all ceased their heretical questioning that day and accepted the Divine Right of Kings. A celestial light suddenly shone into the room and blazed upon a bust of Pope Gregory VII and the statue wept miraculously. The Lord's Prayer was recited, and the Archangel Michael himself descended and banished the apostates to the lands of barbarous, illiterate heathens.

The professor lost his tenure and was expelled the following day. He was sent by ship into the horizon, where he fell off the edge of the Earth.

1 Peter 2:13-20

>>2942953
>anarcho-monarchism

>>2946253
>smirked philosophically
I thought it was smirked jewishly?

>>2946253
Very good

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>>2946475

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>>2946285
That's a different one

>>2946477
C H E E K Y

>>2946277
Polish libertarians are monarchists tbqh.

>>2946253
A brazen,deadly gangster policeman professor and parroting puppet of the computer god was teaching a class on Franklin D. Roosevelt, a known Tsarina Fag.
"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship The Worldwide Mad Deadly Communist Gangster Computer God and accept his lifelong Frankenstien radio controls!"

At this moment, a brave writer of unforgivable thruths and terrorized member of the master race who had typed over 1500 poorly worded rants and understood how CIA gangsters pump deadly poison nerve gas-smoke into secret compartments and lived in a low,deadly niggertown old house,stood up ALONE and held up a thick, strong homemade appeal brief.
"How long do people naturally live before they are dead or useless?"

The cackling, sneering, co-conspiring felon gangster parroting puppet officer professor laughed his mad giggle now,and smugly replied "70 years, you helpless and hopeless frankenstien slave."

"Wrong. People are subjected to worldwide systematic instant-plastic surgery butchery murder,inside a sealed computer god robotic operating cabinet"

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his nerve gas ball point pen and blurted many statements. He stormed out of the room crying those hangmanrope sneak Gangster playboy tears.

The students applauded and were all notarized as pummellers of niggers that day and converted to Astrocism,the true religion of the Slovene people.
A deadly touch tarantula spider named "MENACE TO GANGSTER GOVERNMENT" trajected around corners into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tabin needle on the ticker tape. The worldwide open secret was read several times.

The professor lost his tenure and was put into Maximum Security Insanity Prison the next day. He died of the The worldwide completely controlled deadly degenerative climate and atmosphere and was lead into Frankenstein living-death eternal slavery
MAKE COPIES FOR YOURSELF!

>>2947283
wait, what?

>>2947346
Worldwide open secret. Solely Mr. Dec heralds the true god in the entire history of the universe. Not even in the Truth, oy vey, Pravda, is Mr. Francis E. Dec Esquire's eight-page detailed letter exposing the worldwide deadly Communist Gangster Computer God and the worst deadliest enemy of the entire human race and the entire universe and the entire history of the entire universe namely the Communist Atheist Conspiracy with all of the Deadly Gangster unbelievable sophisticated Frankenstein Controls, the Catholic Church. These facts, like the below facts, cannot be found in the Communist Gangster Computer God concocted and manipulated so-called history and news media.

Communist Gangster Computer God, unbelievably staged like Hollywood scum-on-top Tsarina alias Great Dictator Franklin D. Roosevelt, the polio paralyzed legless drug addict idiotic suicidal Tsarina fag who had his unbeatable rival Will Rogers exterminated in an exploding ball of flame by a planted bomb here in safe USA airfield shortly after take-off at the end of Will Rogers' unprecedented renowned arduous 'round-the-world good-will flying trip with Wiley Post in his beautiful electronically sophisticated luxurious ultra-modern Winnie Mae airplane. Not only all stairways had inclines added for Tsarina Roosevelt's computerized wheelchair, but a football field sized glass house type building was built in sight of the White House for his medicinal piped-in pure warmed seawater into his gigantic suicide-proof two feet deep swimming pool where he waded naked with his nurses and had sodomy affairs. Ones very near to him have written popular books about his sodomy oy vey love affairs. Already in his third term he was a helpless and useless stretcher case incapable of even appearing at his fourth term convention.

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>>2947346
This One World Communist who married his immediate cousin Eleanor Roosevelt like his runted sickly pock-faced grandfather, propagandized as a hunter and a sportsman, Teddy Roosevelt here from Oyster Bay Long Island, the Rosenfelt family another Computer God top secret camouflage for gifted Ethiopians as a big-time kid gangster politician Computer God even raised his age for historical purposes. Teddy Roosevelt was paid off with the Vice President knew absolutely nothing farce position title.

Repeatedly Vice Presidents have successfully waited and lurked to eliminate El Presidenté oy vey. Below are a few examples. So the kiddish gangster Teddy Roosevelt lured midwestern Dope McKinley into New York for extermination like the lowly guttermouth big L.B. Johnson lured playboy sodomist eat-with-the-Mafia Jack Kennedy into his home town Dallas wide open. People say it was the three brothers Sam, Milton and Lyman Jacobsen who with the judges feloniously swindled the Governor of Texas out of the U.S. Senator election shortly before Lyman was fixed as the compromise choice for Jack Kennedy's Vice Presidential nominee.

>>2947346
Who ever saw a Lyndon married to a tiny runt Birdie under Computer God orders even Birdie now has changed her name for historical purposes to Lady Bird nu? And even her Ethiopian surname is now changed to Taylor. It was the scummy bum lowly gangster Lyman as Presidenté who had the gigantic Tsarina swimming pool deepened several feet to a regular swimming pool and regularly had naked sodomy swimming parties with women personnel. GANGSTER MONKEY SEE, GANGSTER MONKEY DO. Now that the Pope John in the Vatican has a similar swimming pool to share with the endless numbers of nuns to help him forget his good old days as a married man naked in bed with high holy communion sodomy.

In not that world renowned untouchable felon gangster Tricky Dick Nixon whose daughter Tricia is married to Davy Eisenshanker Junior nu? Nixon was the sure loser to the fag queer kid Bobby Kennedy until he was lured into very distant Tricky's home town Los Angeles. Did not gangster Tricky Dick Nixon do more than feloniously watch Eyesight Television of Bobby Kennedy's extermination?

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>>2947346
Abe Lincoln's Computer God alias for Abe Lin-Cohen's law partner was Stanton. Abe and the gangster courts feloniously conspired fabricated patent infringements to swindle thousands of dollars from C. McCormick Weeper Machinery Company. As president, Abe made Stanton a Cabinet member in order to automatically become President Stanton concocted a grandiose murder scheme to murder not only Lincoln but also the Vice President and Secretary of State. Secretly, Vice President Johnson overseered it. Lincoln was murdered and Secretary of State Seward was very seriously injured.

Automatic President Harry "Shimmelman" Truman in terror, gave political concessions to Congress to enact abolishment of the automatic succession to the Presidency by Cabinet members. For cheap conspired felonious party fix Gangster Nixon gave Presidency to known felon Gerry Ford another Computer God alias the wide open life long felon bribe extortionist forgerer and check launderer Gerry Ford.

>>2947346
David Eisenscheimer or Eisenshanker another runted Negroidically befreckled semi-illiterate cowardly yokel kid, also Jimmy Carter who shared the sodomy drunk beds of the military academy with Niggers under secret Computer God orders upon graduation. CIA changed even his family gravestones. Camp David in Maryland was named after him, for him, and by him, including the Division of SS Secret Service troops who even tended his playboy giant golf course. Here David Eisenshanker hid in cowardly terror and watched World War Two on Eyesight TV. His historical name, Dwight Eisenhower. As president for months he was dying, in a coma, useless and helpless. Oy vay.

Sneak shameless hangman rope gangster government leaders into Frankenstein living death eternal slavery, I now go to death for your lowest deadly felony crime against me. Frankenstein Earphone Radio parroting puppet gangster slave do not dare to repeat any part of this truthful message. For like Mr. Francis E. Dec, Esquire, you too are expendable and you too can be beaten bloodily by the gangster police and dragged in chains into a windowless telephone booth type prison cell and put into maximum security insanity prison for undetectable extermination, and by the lowest gangsterism, namely, the law, character assassinated for life as an insane, criminal menace to this worse Gangster Communism. Now that your terrified, trembling delirium has subsided have your computer subdivision play out my letter, and you, reread my letter FOR YOUR ONLY HOPE FOR A FUTURE. Francis E. Dec, Esquire, 29 Maple Street, Hempstead, NY.

>>2947346
Worldwide Communist Gangster Computer God scum-on-top staged like Hollywood with plastic pale stand-in actors with Communist Gangster Computer God speed recording, instantaneous, simultaneous edited simulated voices implanted for all TV and news media microphones in any known language. Unbelievable con artist gangsterism solely for the overall plan. Worldwide eternal Frankenstein living death slavery. Yokel felon King Jimmy Carter slime from the academies which Mr. Dec intelligently refused unsolicited acceptance to the most elite academy from here in Niggertown and even insidious con artist gangster divorcée Pope John, they both speak Spanish and even Portuguese. Solely Mr. Dec exposes False God Sodomy and Gomorrah of you Worldwide Computer God parroting puppet gangster slaves. Make copies for yourself you hangman rope gangster scum-on-top. LAUGH YOUR MAD GIGGLE NOW!

>>2947283
>>2947350
>>2947353
>>2947354
>>2947357
>>2947359
>>2947361
Wots oll this then

>>2940090
Literally me

>>2940090
If anything /his/ has made me despise commies even more.

>>2944651
>crayons on cardboard

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>>2944813

>>2940266
>History sees British colonialism as nothing but bad
Giving up colonies was a mistake.

>>2942504
>post scarcity will ever happen

>>2945644
kek

>>2945689

DELET

>>2947504
It has literally already happened in all industrialized nations in the western world. Capitalism is standing in the way of post-scarcity benefitting everyone.

>>2947478
well, it was drawn by an autistic finn.

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Typical day on the eastern front.

>>2942605
I thought the Germans bragged about taking down the Romans, not being them. And Germans in Germany and North America are doing very well and don't live in shacks.

Nothing about this picture makes sense to me. Please explain.

>>2944875
Anti/pol/s would just shitpost until they got derailed. Because crusades are western and therefore 100% Nazi alt right ebil that can never be enjoyed even ironically or even discussed unless it's to meme about smelly euros.

>>2947551
Justify that claim or be called a commie.

>>2945729
God damn it Luigi, you fucking cur

>>2946490
>bongo bongo land

>>2946484
man i wish i was a monkey bird that breathed fire

>>2947431
Francis E Dec.
The most woke nigga in history

>>2946484
>I may have embellished a bit

>>2944665
funniest thing this week

>>2948699
Fuck off we're full.

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>>2946069

>>2945436
kek

>>2949325

don't worry, now you have refugees to fill the holes ^^

>>2940253
how is kurdistan's existence scary?

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>>2948056
>Nothing about this picture makes sense to me. Please explain.
For the roman bit, google "Holy Roman Empire".
For the odin bit, google "Germanic paganism"
For the jew bit, google "Nazi Germany"
For the rest, google "Joke"

>>2942503
This is gret, except that austria should own czech republic and the hungarians should own the rest

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>>2949530
Ask Turkey

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>>2945689

>>2941277
the potato isn't native to russia

>>2942499
t. jidf

>>2947477
this desu

>>2949869
Brainlet detected

i made this recently, i guess it qualifies as /his/-related humour

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=du3j4iaXX8U

>>2940090
In high school I was atheist and blamed everything on religion
then I went to college and realized that religion is not so bad after all
then I went to /his/ and learned to hate religion again

>>2949735
question of the century; was Luther pepe or wojak?

>>2940266
>His orders had been only to put down the rebels, and by conquering the whole Sindh Province he greatly exceeded his mandate. Napier was supposed to have despatched to his superiors the short, notable message, "Peccavi", the Latin for "I have sinned" (which was a pun on I have Sindh).

>tfw will never serve under such an absolute chap

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>>2946477

>>2947283
a daring synthesis

>>2941280
I have, thought it was fucking boring.

>>2950054
jidf detected

>>2948079
It's /pol/'s fault. Seeing brainlets LARP as crusaders every day gets old after a while.

>>2950554
Spurdo

>>2946477
Roasties BTFO.

>>2944806
That'd be great, and we can have a historically inaccurate TV show rendition on the history channel

>>2945410
Lol gets me every time

>>2946477
I kind of have an erection lol

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>>2940273
Delet

>>2940287
>saving a thumbnail
>posting a thumbnail
>being this plebeian

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>>2951366

>>2950554
wojak

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Made this a while back

>>2940266
I love being Anglo

>>2954586
Love it

>>2945854
>your

>>2940257
kekd

>>2941542
>Iliad not under his pillow

>>2942540
underrated

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>>2954586

>>2946486
Fucking flawless

>>2942953
Ancap and ancom should be switched

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OC

>>2951665
t. Toby Fox

fuck off back to your degenerate gay anal guinea homo /vg/ cesspit

>>2957065
Change "Kingdom of Bohemia" to Heinrich Matthias von Thurn and it'll be perfect.

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>>2940082

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>>2940082

>>2950545
I became an atheist back when I was 11 years old. Just like you, I used to believe that religion was the cause for most problems in society. Then I realized that society as a whole is deluded about tons of shit, not just religion, and that religion should be the least of my concerns.
I'm still an atheist, but killing religion is no longer my greatest priority. Religion is, in my opinion, not really beneficial for societies, but it's not exactly the world's biggest problem.

>>2954586
cringe

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OC

>>2942953
>anarchy
>lawful

>>2958373
The final stage is National Socialist tho

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>>2958409
nah brah

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>>2958409
>crude meme emotional appeal propaganda to convince G*rmanics to let a tyrant cuckold them is the final stage

>>2958474
>>2958457
>>2958409
Communism governed by AI is the final stage.

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>>2958486
>3 months later

>>2958486
I agree desu

>>2958513
I should be more specific. The problem I have seen with communism is that human greed and hunger for power always causes it to be horrible corrupt. So an AI that controls the allocation of resources without concern for its own self interest would bypass this problem. It would not be a sentient AI in the sense people normal think of, SkyNet being a prime example. It would be a goal seeking AI with the goals being the efficient and fair allocation of all resources under its control. I do not know how you would handle the problem of the people controlling it seizing power, that is beyond my expertise. The goal being that you could have a society free to pursue its own goals with the AI controlling and issuing a UBI.

>>2941280
I liked Cod better, but still a good read.

>>2958553
Until people get upset with what they're getting and foment rebellion.

People have historically not taken well at all to being explicitly governed by machines.

>>2958668
>Until people get upset with what they're getting and foment rebellion.

An AI would take this into account.

>People have historically not taken well at all to being explicitly governed by machines.

Source?

>>2958553
Make the government AI open-source to prevent any fuckery by someone who wants to seize power or to skew the system.

>>2940082
>humour

>>2942499
This is board is slow and reddit as fuck, so you wish lol.

>>2958713
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Matrix_(franchise)

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>>2948056
Welcome to nordicism

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>>2942659
Majiid Nawaz is a joke isn't he?

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I know some of you gentlemen have a Pepe version of /ourguy/ share please

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>>2960789
Here you go. Theres a /his/ meme thread up right now.

>>2959172
Then what are you doing here?

>>2961897
Looking for an honest man

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>>2958457
>that quote

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>>2958457
>having Christian morals well not bring Christian
Du bist ein schwacher, idiotischer Witz eines Mannes

>>2958553
"Greed" and "hunger for power" are not the primary problems when it comes to efficient resource allocation.

Sufficiently complex and chaotic systems (including economies) are extremely hard to model and stuck between emergent properties and uncertainties you simply can't compute your way to a correct solution from first principles within the lifespan of the universe. What you need is either a simplified model, or many attempts to home in on the correct answer. In fact these two are one and the same - your models require a large amount of real-life experimentation and validation to get right.

In essence, with a system too complex to comprehend a priori you need to try many different things to find the ones which work. This is the case for humans, and it will be the case for artificial intelligences.

A system with many competing actors (e.g. a healthy capitalist system outside a monopoly or cartel situation) does just that - many routes to potential success are envisioned, explored, and tested against each other, with the better ones surviving. This pseudo-evolutionary process is how resources can be allocated relatively efficiently.

An AI might be better than humans at doing so, but it will also have to take the experimental route, simply because other routes don't exist.

tl;dr: Empiricism trumps rationalism.

>>2944875
The crusades trigger the Jew, the Muslim, the atheist and the neopagan alike. They are the ultimate weapon.

>>2945644
>metal above jazz

triggered

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>>2963085

>>2963085
These kill me every time.