>mom was a bitch >killed brother >probably not real lol

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>>2257470

Read the catalogue next time, faggot.
>>2257289

>Local monk takes Bible seriously; ruins everything

>pagan dude tries to kill a prophet
>ends up 'converting' and steals the caliphate after his death

>be a bum
>take over the world

>"my mother didnt want to have sex with me so I started a orld war"

>garlic lover
>brings horses over the channel
>ruins everything

>>2257793
Great Britain

>>2257869
Guillaume le Conqueror

>Raids the mediterranean
>becomes king of Sweden

>>2257793
Jesus

>>2257793
good old Willy

>>2257480
martin luther

>>2257470
Lol Romulus

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>>2257868
WILLY

>have an idea to go take some pasta niggers land
>before the trip a bunch of dicks get chopped off
>get blamed and cant go on the trip
>its a total failure anyways who care

>>2258454
Alcibiades

>>2257480
>remove 7 books
>takes the Bible seriously
Choose one

>>2258458
My nigga

>>2258459
James was a book of straw

Also he suggested removing those books from the NT, no Protestants actually did it. The deuterocanonical books of the OT had no place in the Bible.

>>2257470
>got my peepee succ on plane
>BTFO serbia

>>2258470
Hitler never got blown on a plane

Hitler never even had a blowjob

>>2257470
>damn i'm a cuck
>DAMN i'm a cuck
>but y'all are even biggers cucks so i get to be the kang

>>2258475
>>2258481
Don't know how that even happened desu

Meant to reply to guy above me

>>2258063
hah

>not taken seriously by anyone
>present boorish & bombastic speeches that speak to the poorer, and less educated in ever growing rallies,
>surprise everyone by actually taking control of the government

>>2258524
Hitl...I mean Drumpf amirite lol

insane caliph/imam convinces people he is god and spawns a new religion

>>2257470
CAIN???

>>2258578

muhammad?

Hand problems leads to writing erotic fanfiction about his mother

>>2258966
Freud?

>>2258960
no

>>2257470
>Those darn Jews!

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>>2258332
proud of you

>>2258977
No

>>2257922
bjorn ironside

>>2258578
Hakim II

>>2259265
correct but he was the first and only hakim of the fatimids

>>2257470
jengis

>>2257470
Almost every ottoman sultan before the 17th century.

>>2258966
Wilhelm II

>>2257868
Can someone please explain this meme to me?

>>2257470
>Some homeless Wizard fucks a Queen and has an insane amount of HP

>Apathetic neckbeard just wanted to enjoy life with his trap wife even though he hated his mom, goes down in history as insane

>A big guy stands on a bridge and fucks up the entire English army for 20 minutes

>>2259794
2nd one is Nero?

>>2259794
First one is ra ra Rasputin

>>2259801
>>2259810
Correct

>>2259794
Harold Godwinson is the last one

>>2259831
Actually, no. The last one is a Battle, not a person.
Even though you are right

>Man is fucking a lot of bitches
>Has to keep it on the down low because the government hates a player
>Some journalist fuck spills the beans
>Wreck that fuckers shit
>Go to jail
>Get shot trying to climb out a window

>>2259794
First one is Obviously Rasputin.

Second is either Nero or Elgalabus

3rd is that one norse dude who held the bridge

Island emperor obsesses over the west and starts war with sword wielding businessmen

>Be an Ace Pilot
>Everyone keeps jacking you off because you're the best kid in the pilot academy
>Enemy pilots take their hats off to you
>Constant popularity hard-on
>Now watch as i dogfight an entire squadron of experienced wingmen
>wasted.hullpainting

>>2259302
Kaiser Wilhelm felt a strong sexual attraction for his mom, and her not reciprocating it played a big part to his downfall into autism

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/kaiser-wilhelm-ii-s-unnatural-love-for-his-mother-led-to-a-hatred-of-britain-8943556.html

Overrated knight/hero from north of the wall with only one major victory to his name.

>>2261236
Trump

>>2257470
Cain

>>2261248
No, I don't think Trump was a knight...

>>2259794
>>2259986
Third one is the Battle of Stamford Bridge

>>2261236

Wallace

>>2261347
Correct.

>be king

>be a lazy fuck

>give country democracy because you can't be assed to govern

>>2263148
Italy?

>I have united my country, now we have the power to create the greatest empire of all time
>why are my ships sinking
>dies

>>2263154
Not quite, same continent

>be french
>hear about holy roman empire
>declare it is none of these

>king drowns
>everyone leaves

>>2263148
Britain?

>>2263193
Voltaire and the
>H
>R
>E

>>2263196
3rd crusade

>>2263193
Napoopan

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>>2263206

>>2261253
no

>>2263222
lold

>old guy destroys Napoleon's troops in Italy and crosses the Alps afterwards

>>2257470
>Lol i'm son of the king
>get killed and shoot out of the cannon
>lol i'm alive
>get killed
>lol i'm alive
>get killed

>Go on a lads trip to slaughter Saracens
Or
>Cuck Anglobro of his continental holdings instead
He chose #2

>be NEET
>become a king
>can't find a wife to be queen
>lol, my waifu is queen now

>>2263343
Alexander Suvorov

>>2263372
First crusade?

>>2263365
LOL is this that leader of Boko Haram who the Nigerians have killed like 5 times and they just keep shuffling another body double in front of the camera to troll Nigeria?

>>2263377

Any number of Chinese emperors?

>guys in boats arrive
>ruin everything for everyone forever
>leave

>man learns to NEVER steal cucumbers

>>2263406
Vikings

>>2263433
Vikings didn't ruin THAT much.

>>2263406
Africa

>>2263406

You've just described like... a hundred different major events.

I am going to go with the Sea People.

>>2257470
Romulus

>>2263573
underrated post

>>2263600
1)It's literally what OP was going for
2)I said this already
3) it's been like 5 seconds since that was posted it can't be underrated

>>2263388
It's describing a person.

>>2263573
/thread

>>2257777

Umar ibn Al-Khattāb, second Caliph of the Rashidun Caliphate.

a wealthy general is killed ironically on the other side of his world

>>2263176
spanish armada?

>Christ i really need to shit.
>This ball sucks
>I just really need to go
>Fuck it, not like anyone below would give a shi-

>>2258465
Luther never removed James, I wish this retarded fucking meme died already.

>>2259794
2nd one is literally me except I won't be remembered by history.

>>2257470
Atilla the hun

>protestantism is rad
>fuck catholics
>forward, my svens
>fug, horse 2 fast
>get shot
>dies.

>what is this, what are you doing my son?
>succeeding you, father

>HAIL FUCKING HITLER
>wait, these people actually like me
>heheh fuck the US
>HELP US, US!
>back in spain lmao hehe
>go back home
>make my slut vicepresident
>die, slut becomes pres
>>2265968
et tu?

>>2265961
Gustave Adolphe

>Stole my wife
>Get my wife back
>They were mean to me
>Conquest time

>>2260603
>Kaiser Wilhelm felt a strong sexual attraction for his mom
There's absolutely no evidence for this. Psychohistorians need to fucking die out already because they offer nothing except grasping at straws. It's bad enough that we have "LGBT" historians coming out of the woodwork and creating historical fags out of thin air. We don't need this shit too.

>Be tanner in shitty angloland
>wow war in France is kewl
>shit no more job now
>fucks shit up with his band of boyz
>becomes hero of Milan

>>2266011
Genghis Khan

>>2266055
Good job

>>2263406
European migrant crisis?

>>2263372
Philip Augustus?

>>2266087
Correct

>>2266025
Robin Hood

>>2265989
Peron?

>>2266095
No it's John Hawkwood

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>burn his entire country while fleeing
>stay on a top of ash and rubble and call it a success

>>2266453
Tsar Alexander

>>2266097
si

>>2266537
i was thinking in kutuzov but your answer can also be considered right

>>2260588

Manfred von Richthofen

>>2267421
Oh yeah
Alexander didnt flee since he was never on the battlefield to begin with