ITT: We're delegates at the First Council of Nicaea

>implying it was anything more than a way for Constantine to stabilise his empire

Theodora is a whore and Zoroastrianism is the one true faith.

Paul was a fraud, and the whole religion a farce. Polytheism is the better alternative.

Arius did nothing wrong

How about this lads: the essence of the holy trinity can be perceived by the carnal senses, and once a person experiences the essence of God they are free from moral obligations.

>>1507443
Is Nicholas gonna have to slap a bitch?

>>1508335
FUCK
OFF
MESSALIANS
REEE

I think we should just cut to the chase and worship Mary. Is anyone actually going to try and fight me on this?

>>1508395
Me

>>1507392
>>1507401
Guess who's getting blinded and castrated?

no idea if they were present but FUCKING FAGGOTS YOU ARE WORSHIPPING THE WRONG GOD FUCKING IALDABAOTH REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Guys what about this right here? It says "sola fide"

>>1508570
Why are you pointing at a pile of shit?
Palatinae! Get this madman outta here!

Christ is duo natured and if you disagree you can just go get crucified like the dirty heretic you are

>>1507443
Don't joke about that

>>1507443
(USER WAS EXCOMMUNICATED FOR THIS POST)

>alright guys, im glad we could all agree on the pointy hats, now onto this whole jesus thing

Guys, can't you see that the LORD of the old testament is wroth, vain, and base? OPEN YOUR EYES SHEEPLE YOU'VE ALL BEEN TRICKED BY THE DEMIURGE

>>1508716
There hats weren't pointy yet

>>1507373
why does constantine have a crown like that of a medieval king

Lemme tell you, there's something I just don't like about these Arabs.

>>1508732
>the hats in op arent pointy

Bruh, we gotta start making commoners think they have to pay us to remit their sins. Those stupid fucks won't figure out it's bullshit for like a thousand years and we'll still get to fuck hos too.

>>1508761
That art is from the renaissance

>>1507373

The fact that Christ is dual-natured necessarily implies that the human nature was created through sex, and only the divine nature was generated through some non-sexual function. But Mary is a virgin. Ergo, Jesus was born from anal sex, because sodomy doesn't erase virginity.

Everyone agrees with me, right?

Lets make up 300 years of history from 600 AD to 900 AD

>>1508796
>hey arius, watcha doin?

You're all re-enacting it pretty accurately indeed

>>1508335

Go fuck your sister, Lucifer worshipping heathen desu

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>>1507373

>>1507373
JESUS DIDN'T HAVE REAL FLESH YOU FUCKING HERETICS! HOW THE FUCK CAN HE BE FULLY GOD AND FULLY MAN?!

Hey so like should we maybe not include the Jewish shit in the Bible to avoid confusion and for idiots to confuse Christianity with Judaism for the next 2000 years?

>>1508796
how did this meme start?

>>1508991
our favorite tripfag, Constantine

>>1508983
god damn it Marcion allow people to get married and fuck so your ideas don't literally die out

>>1508997
sauce?

where is consty for that matter?

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>>1507373
Can I borrow you're holy cross for a few years? Need to test some stuff out.

>>1509006
I don't know where it is in the archives. Constantine is a orthodox christian poster that comes on religious threads often though I haven't seen him in awhile

>implying Jesus is divine
>mfw based Arius showed that the Lord created the Messiah and was not "coexistent" with Him

>inb4 "h-heresy!!1!"
go back to >>>/Rome/

>>1509006
>>1509023
He just doesn't use the trip anymore

>>1508335

SOMEBODY GET THIS HOTHEAD EXCOMMUNICATED

>>1507443

SORRY I CANT HEAR YOU OVER ALL THE HELL YOU ARE GOING TO

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>>1508705

>>1507401
>Theodora
200 years too early, nigga.

>>1507373
>muh church fathers
We must agree on something guys! What are we, Gnostics?

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>>1508900

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>>1509216

can we retcon paul now

>>1507373
DONATIST HERE. I DIDN'T WANT TO COME TO YOUR FUCKING MEETING ANYWAY.

CARTHAGE IS DONATIST RRREEEEEE

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Worshipping Jesus is like the coolest thing ever bro, being a totally incorrect heretic is like the most heinous
Come listen to our really radical ecclesiastical chants in Koine Greek, broseph, it's like the most triumphant thing ever
Now preach like he once preached
Be excellent to eachother
Party on dudes
*air lute solo*

>>1509366
no it's okay we came to an agreement on the donatist thing: You guys just need to fucking chill and get over it, and it's fine.

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Did somebody say delegates?

>>1508335
You telling me i can taste the holy trinity?

>>1510450
*hits frankincense*
Yeah sure buddy

>>1508732
We have to do something about this.

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Guys, enough fooling around; let's get to business. We have 60 million souls at stake, if we want them to avoid the fires and flesh-eating worms of hell, we must teach them the true Catholic faith. Here it comes...

Since Jesus didn't seem to have much affection for gentiles (Matthew 15:21-28, Mark 7:24-30, Mark 6: 5-7) until after the resurrection, I think we can safely ignore his lifetime teachings and attitude of Jewish supremacy. I mean he was a pretty cool guy right? Everyone says so, he was a pretty cool guy. Plus the resurrection.

Now Paul thankfully reverses this stranglehold of Salvation that James and the apostles try to keep among the Jews alone. Since he was living in the end times and they were about to be "caught up together with them (the resurrected dead) in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air", gentiles shouldn't have to convert to Judaism or follow Jewish religious practices in order to follow the resurrected Jesus. There literally wasn't enough time left before the end! They only need to be baptized. Good for us.

I think we should emphasize the twatiness of the Jews. Since the one, true creator of the universe had a "chosen race" he decided to reveal all his miracles, prophets, divine laws, and plan for salvation to; we can assume he's kinda a tool. Jesus and the apostles are also toolish for wanting to keep salvation among the Jesus as well. Maybe Paul's like a real life Prometheus, bringing salvation to a world that will eventually accuse him of "distorting" the pure, loving message of Jesus? His condemnation by Muslims dickheads like Mohammed and Thomas Jefferson is a price he's willing to pay in order to save the whole world.

>>1510588
Judaizer please go. Jesus healed the Centurion's servant and praised his faith as being greater than anything in Israel.

>>1510424
NO FUCK OFF GIVE ME ATTENTION

ALSO PLEASE GIVE SOLIDII SO WE CAN FIGHT MAURI PLEASE

>>1507373
I think we can't call Jesus, Son of God, because if we think about it, God didn't litterally beget a child with Mary, it was more like an insemination.

>>1507435
Guards! Expel this gentile from the Holy Assembly !

Pontius Pilate did nothing wrong

>>1510631
Judaizer was the exact opposite of my post.

It's more in line with Marcion

>>1509023
>>1509089
>he
Rude.

>>1510699
I agree he literally wiped his hands clean, the Jews killed Jesus, they would've killed him sooner if it wasn't for him

>>1507373
>mfw I stayed home an fapped all night.

t. Armenian Apostolic church

Origen was actually a really smart guy

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>What if Jesus was God but didn't actually know

>How can the body resurrect? What if a sailor dies at sea and fish eat the body and then someone eats the fish? Do the pieces come out again when the body is raised?

>If Jesus is God why in Mark 10:18 does he say “Why do you call me good? No one is good except God alone" did Mark just have a theological hiccup or did Jesus have a brain fart

>Why does Jesus act like a retard in the Gospel of John, was it autism?

>>1512270
>Genesis 1 shouldn't be taken literally because the world being created in 6 days appears oversimplified and illogical
and what model for the creation of the earth and heavens do you propose we replace this with, wise guy?

My feet hurt

>>1512349
Do we really need to know what it was to know what it was not? Maybe in this case you could make an argument, but in general, you do not necessarily need to know what something is to know what it is not.

e.g. you don't know me but you are likely reasonably certain I'm not a dog.