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Anonymous
APPLE KEYNOTE THREAD 2 2017-09-12 05:21:24 Post No. 62385293
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APPLE KEYNOTE THREAD 2 2017-09-12 05:21:24 Post No. 62385293
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new phone never
>>
I am a 25 year old lolicon
>>
DEAR APPLE
I AM A SLAVE TO THE COMMANDS OF MY WATCH
THANKS STEVE
>>
fucking sticky mods
>>
HEY APPLE I AM FUCKING FAT
FIX MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
ALSO I'M GAY AND BLIND AND CHINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE
>>
Mods, please sticky this so we don't have a hundred threads at once.
>>
STICKY WHEN
>>
That bitch doing push-ups is going to snapcity
>>
Mods sticky
>>
MOOOOOOOOOOOOODS STICKY PLS
>>
>>62385336
fpbp
>>
Are mods poorfags?
>>
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>>62385293
WHERE IS THE STICKY
FUCK
>>
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>>
WE
>>
IS HE SQUINTING
HE'S BLIND I DON'T KNOW
>>
WOZ IS IN THE HOUSE
>>
chingchong shed a tear :(
>>
hello mister cock
>>
>Wozniak is present
>>
>>62385382
>A white man walking his white daughter to school
this is a good image.
>>
APPLE INVENTED LIVING
>>
THANK YOU TIM COOK FOR INVENTING FITNESS
>>
APPLE INVENTED WATCHES AND DIABETES MONITORING!
>>
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TRAITOR
>>
And they say apple isn't a cult
>>
>>62385336
NANI?
>>
>so moving
>gib money hehehe
>>
NON-GAY YOUTUBE STREAM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_hJJMBosTg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_hJJMBosTg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_hJJMBosTg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_hJJMBosTg
>>
I'd like to invite Jaffa
>>
Oh shit it's Jeff. you know some shit is about to go down.
>>
JEFF GET THE FUCK UP THERE
>>
Im crying atm
>>
>>62385293
is apple hiring audience members to woo?
it's getting fucking annoying.
>>
APPLE SAVED MY LIFE
>>
stream doesn't open in MPC-HC and loads 12-second clips in VLC.
>>
APPLE WATCH SAVED MY LIFE
>>
hi my name jeff
>>
mynamajeff
>>
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APPLE INVENTED EXERCISE
>>
STICKY
T
I
C
K
Y
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WtdPOa71UU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WtdPOa71UU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WtdPOa71UU
>>
>>62385373
they always sticky apple events though wtf happened? MOD MOD MOD MOD
>>
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>>62385336
good lad
>>
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((Avi))
>>
sticky fs
>>
>>62385344
you're beautiful the way you are goyim. Now buy the newest Apple Watch® for just $499 + tax
>>
>>62385422
They are a cult.
>>
>>62385412
cant you just use edge thanks windows 10 best os
>>
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Reminder,
You will never get laid as a green texter.
>>
What time are they going to reveal the fucking phones?
>>
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Fuck the watch gimme HIGH SIERRA NIGGER
>>
BASIC FEATURES FOR A SHITTY WATCH HAHAHAHA
>>
why is the audio volume so low
>>
i was about to go two hours without my routine semen injection but thanks to apple watch reminding me i didnt die of dangerously low homolevels
>>
Reminder to use the actual good link
https://p-events-delivery.akamaized.net/17oiubaewrvouhboiubasdfv09/m3u8/atv_mvp.m3u8
>>
APPLE INVENTED HEARTS
>>
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dumb question but do these really help motivate you to workout? any /fit/ bros here?
>>
>>62385412
Thanks senpai
>>
>>62385293
is apple watch waterproof?
>>
>>62385437
Are you iActive?
>>
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FUCK ME APPLEL DADADDDDYYY
>>
>>62385432
Mpv doesn't have this problem :^)
>>
Will there be any COURAGE this year ?
>>
>>62385456
Get the fuck out 3D pig lover
>>
>sports
disgusting
>>
>>62385449
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODS
STICKKKKKKKKKKYYYYYYYY
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>62385435
Did u send me a discord friend request and type the same thing? Because someone did.
>>
>>62385477
mpv is shit though
>>
>>62385456
I don't fuck with thots.
>>
"BUY OUR $500 WATCH GOY IT WILL CHANGE UR LIFE FOREVEERR"
>>
>>62385336
wew
>>
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ALL BOARDS REPORT!
/v/ here!
>>
>>
which one is the gay Apple CEO?
>>
>>62385478
Yes they removed the fingerprint scanner from the x, because courage
>>
>>62385456
I get laid whenever I want to because I'm not a poorfag and I can afford hookers.
>>
>>
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>>62385456
>virginanon actually believes this
>>
i hope one day you can take insulin with your apple watch
>>
hey that clap triggerer failed to clap
>>
>>62385456
No sex for green text pham
>>
>>
>>62385470
It can but the apple watch isn't the best one, there are way better options.
>>
Watching this on Xbox One
>>
APPLE INVENTED HEART RATE
>>
Wait is that supposed to ve the new apple watch?
>>
APPLE WATCH KNOWS WHEN YOU'RE HORNY
>>
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This guy looks just like Elliott from Breaking Bad.
>>
APPLE INVENTED FITBIT
>>
>>62385476
ten/10
>>
>>62385456
it's why i bought my iphone
>>
apple invented high blood pressure
>>
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>>62385496
/tg/ here
>>
>APPLE WATCH TELLS ME TO STOP BEING A FATASS
Woah
>>
Why do they put it like black people are half of the population, when in reality they're like... 12%? 12 in 100. 1 in 10. 4 in 50.
Average advert video of a crowd of 30 people should include 3-4 blacks, no more.
i am tired of seeing black people on every second apple advert
>>
IPHONE 8 WHEN. FAMILY WAITING FOR FOOD.
REGARDS,
RAMESH FROM INDIA
>>
>>62385473
lol no.
>>
>>62385496
T H I C C
>>
>>62385520
OH SHIT!
>>
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>Willingly feefing Apple and the CIA my biological info
no thanks
>>
This information will totally not be sold to insurance companies.
That would be unethical.
>>
>>62385456
I have an iPhone and I've never even had a gf. I think this shit is a myth.
>>
>>62385470
No. If you need a gay ass watch to go to the gym, you'll never make it
>>
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Who /a/ndroid here?
>>
>>62385489
>t. reddit
>>
>>62385504
>he doesn't have a stacy sister/cousin to confirm all of these things
>>
>apple watch will now notify you whenever you fap
checkmate androidwear
>>
APPLE INVENTED HEART ATTACKS
>>
I am already bored
>>
>>62385515
same desu cant wait for Microsoft's crossover announcement.
>>
does apple watch have a built in defibrillator yet
>>
>>62385520
CERVIX EXPERIENCE
>>
>notifies of high heart rate when not active
so apple watch is for heart infact patients?
>>
APPLE WATCHES WILL MAKE DIABETES CONTROL COOL, THEY INVENTED IT
>>
>>62385524
lel
>>
>>62385530
/g/ /pol/ reporting
>>
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>>62385496
INT/ HERE
>>
>>62385533
You know why.
>>
>>62385456
what about the 73% of the US that uses android?
>>
>High Heart Rate detected, EMT has been dispatched. Thank you for using Apple Watch!
>>
>>62385496
/wg/ here
>>
>>62385470
we dont do cardio at /fit/ so it is useless for us
>>
>>62385470
if you need a watch to motivate you, you are not going to make it
>>
IM CRYING THANK YOU JOBS THANK YOU APPLE
>>
>>62385508
Except when your BMW is the green one.
>>
I mean, the whole heart thing is great for my fett american friends, but can it stop terrorist to help us europeans?
>>
>>62385470
F I T B I T
>>
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>>62385496
what's up fellow /v/ bro?
>>
>>62385470
If i spend 500 bucks on something thinking it will motivate me to do something I'm sure at least yhe money i spent on it will motivate me.
Like buying a thousand dollar post-it.
>>
>>62385470
Holy fuck don't believe the brainwashing nigga. Motivate yourself, you don't need to buy a 300 dollar fucking smartwatch to work out. Put on your running shoes and just fucking do it. Do it now dickface. Motivate yourself.
You have been brainwashed by American consumerism nigga.
>>
APPLE INVENTED HEARTS
>>
>>62385540
enjoy dying of heart cancer
>>
Botnet for your heart
>>
>>62385526
Did it work?
>>
>>62385470
/fit/ here
i don't have one but i can't imagine it can help with lifting other than tracking sets
>>
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>>62385496
>>
wtf it turns out apple invented heart attacks???
>>
What is this gay shit
>>
FUCKING INNOVATION RIGHT THERE
>>
>>62385470
14 words motivate me to workout
>>
this is fucking hilarious
a cult of people who think a heartrate monitor is REVOLUTIONARY
>>
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>>62385496
/bant/ here!
>>
>>62385561
shut up /fit/
>>
Gotta remember to remove my Apple Watch™ when I masturbate.
>>
>>62385561
why would you put your tv this high up
>>
>>62385561
I am greek
>>
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>>62385544
Based bestgirl poster
>>
"Yes, send your heart rate info to Apple, you can trust us"
>>
Getting all your Data for F R E E
>TOPLUL
>>
JEFF YOUR ANXIETY IS KICKING IN GET THE FUCK OUT
>>
Apple invented Toy Story
>>
>>62385544
>there are people on this board that buy apple products
>>
>>62385496
/g/, /vr/, /co/, and /pol/ reporting in
>>
OH BOI
NEW WATCH
THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
I SWEAR
>>
At least they're doing something useful for once
>>
>>62385561
sexy leg, shit flag
>>
toy story confirmed
>>
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>>62385496
/lit/ /his/ /fa/
>>
TOY STORY
>>
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oh hell yeah
>>
>>62385584
No, because a beta is a beta, no matter what his phone is...
>>
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>>62385496
/a/ here
>>
Fitness game changer... fitbit stock will be crashing soon
>>
>>62385504
>he's never searched "green bubbles" on twitter
It's truly sad how vapid people are.
>>
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>>62385496
/fa/
>>
Rate the conference so far
>>
NEW TOY STORY FIGURES
>>
>>62385584
no, but the next one might
>>
MUH HEALTH
KEK do people know we are all going to die?
>>
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>>62385530
One of the few good boards. Bless.
>>
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>>62385496
/tv/ reporting in
>>
>>62385573
The police will monitor your heart rate when in a Muslim area and swiftly arrest you if it increases slightly
>>
>>62385598
>a better heart rate monitor with a lot more technology right there on your fucking wrist isn't innovating
>>
>we're working with FBI
they're not even hiding it anymore
>>
>another masturbatory commercial
yawn
>>
>>62385470
Running and lettuce are memes for the retarded masses.
Read the sticky.
>>
HOLY SHIT HEART RATE MONITORING
REVOLUTIONARY
>>
Apple user but the watch is useless overall
>>
DAMN THIS MAKES MY APPLE WATCH LOOK LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT
>>
It is the exact same design
but now looking even worse
>>
Americans sure love to suck corporate cock. WOOOOO!
>>
OH MY GOD IT WORKS IN THE WATER
BUY BUY BUY
>>
who else here is playing a drinking game?
i'm probably going to die
>>
>>62385537
>not waterprof
so who the fuck will use this for swimming?!
>Lol dude here have my 500Shekel watch while I just do some swimming laps.
>>
Who gives a fuck about Apple Watch, just announce the next macOS
>>
TRULY BEAUTIFUL STEVE JOBS LIVES ON I ALREADY PAID $1600 FOR THE NEW APPLE WATCH AND IPHONE X
>>
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>>62385628
APPLE INVENTED ANIME
>>
>>62385564
but its not muh diversity - it's a replacement.... sshieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetttttttt
>>
>>62385607
me on the right
>>
what happened to johnny ive
>>
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When did you realize you were no longer a person since you did not own an iphone?
>>
>>62385602
Because im too jewish to buy a new tv stand
>>62385603
Im greek too. My name is Mcpablo poduplous
>>
>>62385496
/a/ here
>>
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>>62385544
Yes, hello
>>
>taking calls underwater
holy shit hahahahaha
>>
what the fuck was that advert? Was than an advert for water? Fucking retarded idiots at Cupertino
>>
/vg/tesg/ reporting in
If you're from /vg/ and you don't say whay thread, you're gay
>>
>cellular
rip battery? Or is there no LTE?
>>
That heart monitoring would make me absolutely paranoid. I have panic disorder and just watching this shit makes me feel bad.
>>
Hey, I recognize that song!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sepGQ71PSEQ
>>
>>62385653
Didn't the last series already do that?
>>
>>62385586
>>62385470
if you download Jefit you can put in your reps without picking up your phone
How do YOU track your progress? On a clipboard??
The Jefit app tracks your reps and sets and weight and tracks your progress. The watch lets you input all that without picking up your phone.
>>
So why own a phone than anymore?
>>
Apple invents cellular in watch
>>
BUILT IN CELLULAR!
????????
>>
UHHH DONT YOU JUST HATE IT WHEN YOURE SURFING AND YOUR HOT JAPANESE GIRLFRIEND TRIES TO CALL YOU
WHAT A RELATABLE LIFESTYLE THAT I CAN DEFINITELY ACHIEVE BY BUYING THE [APPLE WATCH]
>>
IT JUST WERKS
>>
>built in cellular
Chinks did that in 2010
>>
APPLE INVENTED CELLULAR
>>
OH BOY YET ANOTHER DEVICE I HAVE TO PAY FOR ON MY DATA PLAN
>>
C E L L U L A R
>>
3 models to put in a cellular modem lmao
>>
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GAME CHANGER
>>
RIP IPHONE
RIP IPHONE
THANKS APPLE WATCH
>>
>cellular built in
iPhone BTFO how will Apple recover?
>>
FITBIT B T F O
>>
>0 innovation
>>
just works
>>
Cellular built in?? The fuck
>>
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>>62385670
/d2g/
>>
CELLULAR BUILT IN
>>
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> be apple watch owner
> drowning in the ocean
> call 911 from your watch
>>
>>62385654
At every *CLAP*, you take a SHOT
>>
>built in cellular
fuck
they actually did it
>>
>>62385514
Like what?
>>
>You will soon be considered a terrorist or pedophile for not using an apple watch
>>
>phone built in
You can now look like retard talking to your wrist.
>>
2 SIMS?? or what
>>
APPLE INVENTED CELLULAR CONNECTION
>>
>>62385666
I fucking love Namori's art so much holy shit
>>
WAIT A SECOND
That thing doesn't have Cellular
HAHAHAHAHAHA
>>
>>62385633
1/10. This is the first time i heard Cook's voice.
>>
>>62385496
/co/, /g/, /v/, and /aco/ here
>>
>just work
WOOOW
>>
APPLE INVENTED CELLULAR
>>
>>62385521
Underrated.
>>
(You)
>>
IT JUST WORKS
>>
>>62385456
I just had sex with an iPhone-using Stacy last night. I'm an Android user.
She said I was so big I crushed her ovaries.
Android users = big dicks (physically and mentally).
>>
>>62385685
But it's not Apple, doesn't count.
>>
>>62385470
no.
if you want to work out, get a membership to a nearby gym that offers cardio machines along with weights. If you're a richfag, get one with towel service and a sauna.
Get in the habit of 'just going' 5 days a week. It's hell at first, but once you have habit+your brain gets used to the sweet, sweet post-WO endorphines, you'll find yourself defaulting to "just go" instead of not.
fitbits &c. are mostly a meme. they do not motivate you, and the most successful that I see at the gym tend not to wear them, or do independently of gainz they made previous to purchase.
>>
>Apple Maps
>>
>>62385679
I KNOW RIGHT ! WE GOT RID OF THE IPHONE8. COURAGE
>>
They just workds
>>
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>Built in cellular
It's ogre
All other watches are finished
>>
10 dollar chink watches had that in 2010 kek
>>
>>62385707
or a racist
>>
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APOLOGIZE /g/
APOLOGIZE /g/
APOLOGIZE /g/
>>
OH MY FUCKING GOD
>>
>>
>>62385607
Me in the back
>>
LOOK AT THAT BEZEL WHAT ARE THEY HINTING
>>
>>62385663
I never was a person to begin with.
>>62385670
/vg/gsg/ reporting
>>
3 HOUR BATTERY LIFE
KEK
>>
GIRLS CAN DENY BETA GREEN BUBBLE POORFAGS RIGHT FROM THEIR WATCH
AAAAAAAAHAHAHHAHAAHAHHAA
>>
Do I need an iPhone to use the Series 3 though? I'd like to get a Smart Watch, but because I'm an Android user, I fear that if I pick up an Android Wear watch, it'd slack on updates, making it a paperweight in a year.
>>
This might actually be cool, now you don't have to carry around your entire life in your pocket just to stay connected
>>
fucking appeasing chinks
>>
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>>62385496
/fit/ checking in
>>
>cellular in a watch
BUT EVERYONE HAS A PHONE LOL
>>
WE ARE DEPRECATING THE iPHONE, IT WILL JUST BE THE WATCH NOW
>>
40 MILLION SONGS AT THE SAME TIME
>>
>supporting the meme that you have to be available to call 24/7
i wish retards would realize that life is better when you're away from your phone
>>
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>2 hour battery life
>2 hour battery life
>2 hour battery life
>>
Funny he doesn^t talk about battery life
>>
He looks dead in the eyes
>>
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Anyone else getting this on edge? The cunts made it so it only works on edge or safari for mac but it still shows up with this for me
>>
LOOK AT ALL THAT CHINESE BRANDING
>>
staying motive
>>
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Why is Elliot Schwartz working at Apple?
>>
>>62385709
it will probably be tied to your phone number via Apple ID like iMessage
>>
Spotify support when?
>>
>>62385663
My phone is older than iphone 2G.
>>
>The perfect track
>Imagine Dragon
KEK
>>
CHINK CHAT WORKS
>>
I love taking the piss out of apple like anyone else, but this shit is at least a little cool
>40 million songs on your wrist
would be scifi 10 years ago
>>
WOW WALE AND IMAGINE DRAQGONS?
FUCKING PLEBS
>>
STAY MOTIVE YOU GUYS
>>
>>62385753
kek
>>
>>62385496
/ic/, /lit/, /sci/, /k/, reporting for duty.
>>
So am i supposed to pay 2 cellular plans now or wtf?
>>
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apple watch = chinkshit confirmed
>>
>dual core watch
this needs to stop
>>
dool core
>>
i like having a cellular watch, desu
but there are too many questions not answered here
the battery will last 30 minutes
>>
HE'S CHOKING HOLY SHIT
>>
>>62385761
update your edge
>>
>>62385774
KEKEKEKEKEKEK
>>
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>>62385496
/ck/ here
>>
MOST ADVANCED TECHNOLOGIES EVER
>>
>>62385761
Ctrl+f5 to hard refresh
>>
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>>
>SERI CAN TALK
GG WORLD COMING TO AN END
>>
BUT BLUETOOTH ALREADY DOES THIS?
>>
DUAL CORE PROCESSOR
>>
>>62385781
Depends on the deals of your carrier really.
>>
HOLY SHIT THE WEATHER
>>
>>62385762
China is going to take over the world in our lifetime anon. Might as well and accept it and get a chinese wife
>>
>Hey Siri please stop recording everything say and sending it to the NSA
>I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave
>>
the guy cant talk
>>
If that's Siri's new voice that's actually pretty impressive.
>>
>>62385761
ctrl + f5
>>
I...It's....re...really convient
>>
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APPLE BTFO
>>
>>62385595
which words?
>>
>>62385496
r9k here
>>
>>62385680
>>62385681
>>62385688
Yeah except you're going to have a $15-$20 charge on your bill to access your data plan
>>
>>62385670
/mbgg/, chink phones are superior for chink games
>>
As someone, who works with watches this really makes my head hurt.
>>
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>>62385496
/3/ and /o/ reporting
>>
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>he cant run m3u8 stream
>>
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>>62385734
>CHEN
>>
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>40 million songs
/g BTFO, APPLE WIN
>>
HE'S CHOKING! He screwed up ten times already!
>>
>his spaghetti is starting to fall out
>>
They're STILL talking about the watch? Went to take a quick shower and was hoping they would move on to the iphone by now.
>>
GOT A SNOWBOARDER OUT THERE!
>>
>tfw no friends to call your watch
At least I have Siri
>>
He isnt gonna make it. He will have a panic attack and start trembling at any moment
>>
>>62385774
lol
>>
I appreciate everyone posting one liner funny shut in caps thank you
>>
>>62385761
get native hls extension for chrome
open https://appleliveevents-i.akamaihd.net/hls/live/222436/17oiubaewrvouhboiubasdfv09/master/4500/4500.m3u8 in browser
profit
>>
GAME CHANGER
>>
>>62385781
call forwarding dummy
>>
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skiing and snowboarding apps for your watch
>>
JEFF WITH THE BANTS
>>
>>62385707
Shit! How will they find out?
>>
>>62385496
/f/ reporting in, sir.
>>
>>62385808
looks like shit
>>
How thicc is that
>>
>>62385293
so they Just implemented a music player?
>>
I still don't understand this
the watch needs to have an IMEI and a SIM
that is by law
>>
>>62385826
The entire event is usually 50mins long.
>>
I wish I could kill the Whoop guy who's in every Apple presentation.
>>
DISPLAY IS THE ANTEENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DISPLAY IS THE ANTEENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DISPLAY IS THE ANTEENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DISPLAY IS THE ANTEENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DISPLAY IS THE ANTEENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
just show the goddamn phone noone cares about that shit
>>
>>62385774
I hope he gets fired for that blunder.
>>
>>62385496
/a/ic/cgl/p/ here
>>
>>62385834
fucking stop
>>
>dual core
Will it run Crysis?
>>
>they didn't make it smaller
DROPPED
>>
>>62385772
>40 million songs on your wrist
is it any different from Andorid watches from 2016?
>>
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WTF HOW THE FUCK
>>
>dual core processor
/G BTFO
>>
>WEECHAT
APPLE TARGETING THE CHINK MARKET NOW
>>
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>ask it a question
>it
siri isnt a she anymore?
>>
>>62385753
>he doesn't multi-track listen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2CKKV4Z44A
>>
>>62385830
>>>62385830
>>62385830
>>62385830
New thread
>>
>>62385761
>edge
fucking kill yourself faggot
>>
what's next the ipad or iphone?
do they always announce iphone last?
>>
>>62385867
N-NANI
>>
BASED SNOWBRO
>>
FITBIT ON SUICIDE WATCH
POLICE LITERALLY AT THE FITBIT OFFICE TRYING TO BREAK DOWN THE DOOR WHILE FITBIT TRIES TO GAS ITSELF
>>
>>62385872
>now
>>
STEVE WOZNIAK
>>
hole fugg new sim cards...
>>
WOW, NICE
>>
APPLE WON /G/
FACE IT
>>
(clap)
>>
>>62385879
nice work retard, we're already in >>62385817
>>
>SAME SIZE
>>
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It's just like in the movies! He's talking to his wrist like a secret agent! Wow I love Apple guys!
>>
Literally just a Series 2 watch but with newer components. Good job Apple.
>>
PROPRIETARY SIM CARD
>>
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>>62385676
>How do YOU track your progress?
i use an android app called Strong
so yeah i guess it'd be cool to track sets without pulling out my phone, but that's not very revolutionary
>>62385718
eat shit nigger
>>
>its same big-ass fucking size as last year
>applause
>>
woz spotted
>>
>THICKER
>THICKER
>THICKER
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
>>
>>62385555
Nice digits
>>
>>62385782
apple coordinating with opressing and autocrathic chinese and american goverments, why do people still buy their products?
>>
>>62385881
Other browsers don't have the codec to view Apple content.
>>
62385906
Fuck off. Mods should ban this shit.
>>
I enjoy the half-assed Woz clap.
>>
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>AT&T
>>
>display is antenna
>watch has LTE
damn nice
>>
>DAT AWKWARD SILENCE
>>
>>62385920
it'd be cool if they released a barebones but thinner watch
>>
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>>62385833
Thanks!
>>
LAUGH YOU PEICE OF SHIT
>>
>>62385834
STICKY FUCKING WHEN
>>
>built in SIM
so your watch is now locked to a specific carrier, kek
>>
PROPRIETARY SIM
>>
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GIVE GIVE GIVE
>>
>>62385906
Well, he IS a Based design innovation GOD.
God damn I miss Steve.
Tim Cuck is just not the same.
>>
HI JEFF
>>
>>62385906
BASED DESIGN INNOVATION GOD
>>
what is this acting holy shit
>>
holy shit, is she streaming that with the watch?
>>
pre-recorded
>>
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>>
>>62385940
So watch it on youtube dummy.
>>
>>
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>You thought people walking around holding their phones out on loudspeaker were annoying as shit? Now they can do it on their watch!
Seriously, what kind of mentalist do you have to be to want to call someone on a watch?
>>
why has nobody ever intercepted one of these calls yet? So many keks could be had with a pajeet prankster.
>>
>>62385906
Based design innovation god.
>>
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O SHIT HE'S GOING ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGUE
>>
>>62385906
Based steve inovative god
I love my mom fuck you
>>
>>62385940
They do. Firefox extension enables you to spoof your UserAgent.
>>
>>62386022
That's why you buy the ear pods (:
>>
Not impressed I can do that on my ching watch
>>
MAGICCCC
>>
CLOSE TO MAGIC
>>
>i'm gonna go rouge for a sec we're collecting all your fucking info and selling it to-
>>
>>62386012
god damn white people are cringe af desu fambalamb
>>
>>62385940
I thought this was a fucking tech board jesus christ
>>
>>62386022
If I was out on a run this could actually come in handy.
>>
>>62386081
delet
>>
>>62385906
BASED DESIGN INNOVATION GOD!
>>
>>62385881
You fucking retard, I just said apple won't let you use it on other browsers. Kys redditor
>>
>>62385849
But almost 40 minutes have passed and all they've talked about is the watch and their stupid campuses.
>>
zeramic waaatch
>>
M A G I C
A
G
I
C
>>
How would have thought that the new apple watch would be able to make something so amazing like cellphone calls? Just like the competition is doing! Magic!
>>
THE MAD MAN'S GONE ROGUE, SHUT IT DOWN
>>
>>62386123
Of course.
>>
>got my series 1 watch on release for $899
>series 1 is now $249
feelsbadman
>>
why don't they change the design or give choices?
All I fucking want is a round screen
>>
>>62386031
Honestly? Intercepting PSTN would be ridiculously hard. Realistically? The ringing is fake, this all comes from backstage team. You don't EVER do anything live. Haven't you ever heard of the demo gods?
>>
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hey guys i'm going to run upstairs to grab some lacroix
when i get back can someone tell me what i missed
>>
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>>62386093
you wish
>>
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>>62386192
>>62386194
>buying anything apple
>>
>>62386123
>But almost 40 minutes have passed
Nope.
>>
>>62386013
I'm stating why they're using Edge, not me.
>>
Is Series 3 without cellular literally just a Series 2 watch with unnecessary dual core?
>>
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>>62385496
/mlp/ here!
>>
>>62386210
faggottry
>>
>>62386192
>$899
wew, that's the one made out of "premium" materials right?
>>
>>62386231
yep.
>>
Fuck, no India.
>>
>>62386245
RIP
>>
>>62386242
The only difference it seems is that you can stream music off the watch and Siri talks
>>
>>62385293
>apple walch
>>
>>62386230
stop
being
poor.
>>
>>62386205
>EE
So it might as well not have cellular then? EE sucks.
>>
APPLE INVENTED GRAY CERAMIC
>>
>>62386194
thanks for betatesting
>>
>>62386260
Shit just hit the fan :^)
>>
TVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVTVVTVTVT
>>
>Apple TV
>>
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>>62386192
welcome to the appleverse, cuck.
>>
booooooo
bring on the phone faggot
>>
>>62386257
nope.
>>
>>62386296
stop
buying
chinese
trash.
>>
RIP OmiseGO
>>
>>62386230
Why do you hate innovation anon?
>>
>Apple TV
Who even has one?
>>
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>>62386205
>Orange
>>
You now realise that Apple Watch would actually be the best name for their streaming service.
>>
>>
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>tv
>>
>>62386192
>got my series 1 watch on release for $899
Good. Now Tim Cook needs you to buy a Series 3.
You're not poor, are you?
>>
APPFEL TEREBISION
>>
>>62385496
/biz/ here
>>
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>same shit
>now in 4k
>>
>>62386376
Alri Tim
>>
>>62386210
>>62386246
ok i'm back what'd i miss
>>
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>>62386245
/v/
>>
>apple tv 4k
whooooooooow
>>
APPLE INVENTED 4K
>>
>>62386296
apple is shit for pirates
stop giving money to leftist entertainment
>>
>>62386433
fag shit
>>
> new advancements
> 4K
lelelelelelelele
>>
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APPLE INVENTED 4K
>>
>>62386339
This stream is so fucking shit, i expect it to tank already.
>>
AW MAI FAKING GAAAAWD FOOOUR KAAAAAY
REVOLUTION
>>
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>4k HDR in a h264 1080p stream
>>
>they fell for the HDR meme
>>
Hahaha that awful pretend simulated HDR.
>>
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with and without desaturate filter
>>
Ew they're going to HDR all your content. Fucking puke.
>>
THANK YOU APPLE I'VE NEVER HAD A MEDIA PLAYER THAT OUTPUT IN 4K BEFORE
>>
>Starts explaining what 4k and hdr is
I see apple doesn't have a high expectation of their audience as well.
>>
>new screensavers!!
>>
>>62386506
Yeah but it's not.
It's bizness as usual.
A lot of the people buying are buying off volume increases and don't even know about apple rumors. I'm not worried.
>>
SPIDERSPOOGE
>>
>>62386567
b-b-but our customers love them
>>
>>62386560
Well of course they know who they're dealing with
>>
APPLE INVENTED SPIDER MAN WITH GRAVITY GUN
>>
4K SCREENSAVERS!
APPLE IS SO INNOVATIVE
>>
WOOOOOOOOOOOO xD
>>
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>>62386560
>Literally years behind all the other set top boxes.
>>
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so this is the power of 4k hdr
>>
FASTER GRAFIX
>>
Apple is Disney never forget.
>>
>>62386478
>leftist entertainment
qq moar you whiny faggot
>>
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Ghhhgggghhhhh
>>
>>62386674
no Disneys cartoon shit is sometimes pretty cool and sad.
>>
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>>
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Good lord they're literally repackaging the past at a mark up.
>>
This guy is pregnant i think
>>
SWEDEN YES
>>
>>62386478
Imagine never being able to enjoy life because your convinced anything fun is "leftist".
>>
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APPLE INVENTED SPIDERMAN
>>
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APPLE INVENTED ANIME
>>
>MyCanal
Wut
>>
APPLE INVENTED ESPN
>>
I should be glad they don't charge more for fucking 4k movies? Is this shit for real?
>>
>>62386717
an apple tv isn't the same as a chromecast, better comparison would be an android tv
>>
>>62386721
I think you're right.
Looks about 5 or 6 months along.
Who is it so I can send him a congrats cards?
>>
>>62386478
I can't believe the jews made me watch spiderman
>>
>>62386716
Considering it's apple and they could easily charge more if they wanted to, that's unexpected
>>
LIVE SPORTS AND NEWS ON TV !!!!!
GAMECHANGER !!!!
>>
SPORTS
>>
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God damn it, I knew it was going to be bad, but this whole thing is so cancerous.
>>
>>62386792
It's clearly Pete Hines
>>
>autistic and critically acclaimed games
>>
APPLE (RE)INVENTED VIDYA
>>
flower isnt even their first game lmao
>>
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IT KEEPS GETTING WORSE
>>
casul
>>
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>apple invented gayming
>>
New Jenova Chen game exclusive for iOS? HELL NOOOOOOOO!
>>
>make video characters
>call them jeff and mike
>>
>for the most casual players
>>
E3 2.0: Autistic Boogaloo
>>
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So it's Journey - Even More Casual Edition
>>
>>62386931
tvOS
>>
>locked at 30 fps
HAHAHAHAHA
>>
>DETAILED CLOUDS
>>
CINEMATIC EXPERIENCE
>>
free all the butter fries, burgers.
>>
show the phoneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
>>
>>62386931
EXCLUSIVELY
FOR
APPLE TV
IPHONE
AND IPAD
>>
iPhone X
>>
Look how they're not even doing anything with the controller
It's a gamr you don't even have to play
>>
iPhone 8 when?
>>
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APPLE INVENTED JOURNEY AND WE THINK YOURE GONNA LOVE IT
>>
it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening it's happening
>>
SHOW US PORNHUB ON THE NEW IPHONE
>>
APPLE INVENTED IPHONE
>>
IPHONE 7 check it
>>
>>62387133
well, you're not wrong
>>
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>magical
>>
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>meaningful
>>
only show S products haha
7S!
>>
APPLE INVENTED BEZEL-LESS SCREENS
>>
APPLE INVENTED MULTITOUCH
>>
APPLE INVENTED EARS
>>
SAME FUCKING DESIGN
>>
THEY ARE NOT EVEN SHOWING THE SCREEN!!! REEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
> not showing the front side
> two different camera types
>>
Looks exactly the same as the iPhone 7 senpai
>>
>>62387367
this
>>
unimpressed.
>>
WHATS DIS
>>
habbinin
>>
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It's PEDO-PHIL!
>>
THE DESIGN IS ALL NEW
>>
>LET DOWN
>LET DOWN
>LET DOWN
>LET DOWN
>LET DOWN
>>
>The design is all new
>>
LMAO IT LOOKS THE FUCKING SAME!!!
>>
jet black RIP?
>>
APPLE INVENTED BROKEN SCREENS
>>
AYY
>>
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>>
How many sheckles for "whew"ing when they hear the word gold?
>>
>>62387419
>>62387392
WAIT TILL THE X YOU MONGOLOIDS
>>
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innovation
>>
>>62387419
new chip though
>>
LMAO THOSE BEZELS
APPLEFAGS B T F O
>>
>THIS IS THE BLUE BALLS BEFORE THEY ANNOUNCE IPHONE X AFTER IT
>>
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hahahahahaha all the fukken leaks were wrong
>>
it has f.lux
>>
B R E A K T H R O U G H
>>
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>>
>THE DESIGN IS ALL NEW
>INNOVATION
>>
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Why even call it 8 when it looks the same? What happened to the dummy model that leaked?
>>
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>Bionic
Hahahaha
>>
>android phones will catch up in performance in 10 years
>>
>>62387492
cant wait till you get btfo in 20 mins from now
screencap this
>>
>>62387524
>>62387466
fuck lost it when they showed the front
>>
>BEZEL
>>
IT HAS NOW A PRESSABLE HOME BUTTON AGAIN!
>>
>>62387491
I want to believe, but my heart is not strong enough for such colossal disappointment
>>
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>>
>machine learning
>on iPhone
nice buzzwords
>>
they are rushing this so fast, they are dropping something after most likely iPhone X mark my words
>>
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DEEPER PIXELS
>>
BUZZWORDS EVERYWHERE FUCK
>>
>>62387562
in your dreams shill
>>
>>62387636
this
>>
File: sdfsfs.jpg (72KB, 1280x720px) Image search:
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>>
NIGGER ASS
>>
ASS
>>
>just look at that blue sky
>zooms in on ass
hahahaha
>>
lagdroid btfo
>>
why are red heads so cute ?
>>
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FRECKLE LOLI
>>
>>62387466
INB4
>one more thing
>IT'S GOT A BIGGER SCREEN
CAP IT
>>
Wtf can someone post both iphone 7 and 8 site by site ? They are literally the SAME
>>
Wake up when iphone X
>>
LOL NIGGER WEARING A JAIL JUMPSUIT
>>
>>62387791
and also 6
>>
> these filters are not filters, they're realtime
>>
>>62387791
>misspells side twice
>>
>only on Plus
>Give us your sheckles, we refuse to put our better camera tech in our smaller model.
fuck phablets.
>>
>>62387861
revolutionary..
>>
So, umm, literally what h264 does?
>>
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>Jew Jew Abrams
>>
>>62387947
>says it will be divided into 2 million tiles
>then says 2 million tiles per second
so it will render at 1 FPS?
>>
APPLE INVENTED POKEMON GO
>>
>gayming on your phone
>>
>needing to hold up your phone to figure out who's playing at a baseball game
fucking normies, REEEEEEEE
>>
Hahaha, cutting to that incredibly bored looking guy in the audience
>>
This isn't some generic android sky nigger this is AppleSky
>>
APPLE INVENTED THE SKY
>>
>>62388086
yeah, i nearly laughed my ass off when that switch happened
>>
>apple changed gaming forever
>>
I'm having e3 flashbacks
>>
>>62388086
Isn't that JJ Abrams?
I bet that he'll shoot a few scenes of the next SW movies with iPhones.
>>
isn't this the exact same AR shit they did at their developer conference?
>>
1.2 million polygons
>>
>Idiots filming a table and destroying their battery life with camera and GPU use.
>>
You have to admit, this AR thing is very well done.
Sony and Microsoft both invested in this for years and came with nothing that wasn't pathetic and abandoned their ideas. Then comes Apple e do the thing right. Haters gonna hate, etc.
>>
>>62388258
kek
>>
I gotta say, I thought this conference was going pretty well until the phone shit
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>>62388266
Yeah I'm halfway impressed actually. Everything else is same old same old, but the halfway decent thing is by something Apple didn't even produce.
>>
This has got to be the most awkward looking "game" since the Kinect
>>
it still has a lightning port haha wtf
>>
>>62388266
>a chink startup creates a game
>apple does AR right
could you shill any harder?
>>
APPLE INVENTED WIRELESS CHARGING
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wireless charging
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>>62388326
>no USB-C
that's a no from me. See you in 2018.
>>
>>62388326
D O N G L E S
>>
WOW APPLE INVENTED WIRELESS CHARGING
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>>62388266
They came up with nothing because AR simply doesn't work, it's a gimmick that is massively fiddly and awkward, and gives no benefits.
>>
How about actual wireless charging where the charger can be 6 feet away and it charges while you're using it?
Huh?
Forget breakthrough in battery technology, just do that so it's continuously charging.
>>
What if you are using a case? Will it charge through it???
>>
>ONE MORE THING
>ONE MORE THING
>ONE MORE THING
>ONE MORE THING
>>
FUCK YES, WIRELESS CHARGING IS NOW MAINSTREAM.
Thank god Apple opted for Qi, Android also benefits.
>>
>>62388486
Most cases are plastic, so yes.
>>
Uh oh...
>>
NO IPHONE X LOL
>>
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>iPhone 8
>Huge Step Forward
>>
>>62388525
It's a vibrator
>>
>nothing about Macs
fucking lol
>>
it cant be it
>>
>>62388486
Yes, I have a thick case on my S8 and it wirelessly charges just fine.
>>
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no mac no ipad
>>
How retarded do you have to be to buy Apple products?
>>
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finally
>>
>>62388652
very
>>
>>62388587
is this the worst aged post ever?
>>
>>62388652
I talk to apple customers for 40 hours a week lol
you would be genuinely surprised
>>
lol they fucking trolled
>>
>skipping number 9
FUCK APPLE IS SO INNOVATIVE
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>iPhone X
>>
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XXXXXXX BOX
>>
>edge to edge
not a fuckin close. bitch
>>
no ugly dust rose thank god
>>
who the fuck would get the 8?
>>
SUPER
>>
>SUPER retina display
ffs
>>
>still no imacs
>no meaningful updates since 2012
topkek
>>
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>SUPER RETINA
>SUPER RETINA
>>
>>62388813
just throw the word super in front of the name theyll never know
>>
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lmao my phone from 3 years ago has more
>>
>>62388813
>>62388819
>>62388856
>>62388860
Tim Cook collected all the chaos emeralds
>>
>>62388867
holy shit look at that status bar ITS SO HORRIBLE
>>
its ugly it looks like a samsung the last good iphone was the 4s
>>
>>62388922
THIS. WHAT WERE THEY THINKING ?
>>
>Tap on the screen to wake up
Battery dies in pocket
>>
My dude Tyler out here
>>
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>home button is now a small bar at the bottom
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"T-t-t-top to bo-bo-bo-bottom." Holy fuck why did they put this guy on the stage?
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>>62389008
they got the boi up on the big screen
>>
NEW IPLOXE WHEN ?
>>
WHAT IF YOU HAVE A TWIN
>>
did he just say iPhone 10
>>
>>62388964
IM TRIGGERED IT LOOKS LIKE A BAD RIP-OFF IOS HAHAHA
>>
>face id
hahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
>>
>No Touch ID, Face recognition instead.
Looking forward waving my phone in my own face like a dick every time I want to pay for something. Not to mention it's incredibly easy to breach like it was when Android had it 5 years ago.
>>
HAHA GOOKS ARE FUCKED
>>
ALL ASIANS LOOK THE SAME HOW WILL THEY USE THIS?
>>
Omg they can't be serious... Face id
>>
>>62389039
>>62389008
Genuinely one of the best albums of the year tbqh
>>
>>62389116
Image recognition != IR
>>
>collected everyone's fingerprints
>so now they use face recognition to collect those next
>>
gets attack
phone won't unlock to call the police lol
>>
My CPU is a neural net processor
>>
>>62389173
oh hell yeah my dude
>>
BIONIC NEURAL ENGINE
>>
>>62389213
b-but srii will call the polis for you :(
>>
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face id is racist
>>
> Steal Celebrities iPhone X
> Go to The Hollywood Wax Museum
> Unlock iPhone X
> Profit???
>>
Give NSA your face pls
>>
>TFW neural network
>samsung btfo
>>
>>62389314
I was going to post exactly this
>>
>>62389314
>unlocks phone
>gets stoned
>>
>1 in a million
Oh come on, they're making this shit up, the product isn't even out.
>>
lmao
>>
>1 in a 1 000 000
>make 32 bit passcode
huh now the possibility is like 1 in a 10^32
>>
ANIME ON YOUR PHONE USING YOUR FACE DATA
>>
>animoji
am i dreaming
>>
>>62389314
thank God
>>
AYY LMAO
>>
>is able to detect a person with 1 in 1000000 accuracy
>apple is going to have this data of every apple user
imagine if this was used in CCTV
>>
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Fucking hell...this is super cringey. I suppose the average Appletard doesn't mind those since they are used to buying into anything Apple says.
>>
>>62389395
>what is testing and data extrapolation
>>
He just called it the iPhone 10.
Where's the iPhone 9?
>>
IT DIDNT UNLOCK
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
>>
>>62389606
you know they are so innovative they skip this out...like windows.
>>
>>62389606
typical apple copying windows years later
>>
OH HO HO HO
>>
LOL LIVE PREVIEW OF FACE ID FAILED
>>
Fucking cringe
>>
>>62389645
On the first attempt. My S8 pulls shit like this with the fingerprint sensor all the time.
>>
>>62389753
stop shilling
>>
LOL THE DEMO FAILED
>>
LMAO
https://x0.at/sff.webm
>>
More like FAIL ID amirite?
>>
>tfw blackface animoji
>>
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>People who use Face ID
Here's to the crazy ones
>>
>>62389773
>stop shilling
>>62389753
>My S8
>>
>>62389806
>dude the gubbamint 1984 nsa spy privacy dude lmao do I fit in yet
>>
>>62389842
Enjoy your psycho bitch girlfriend unlocking your phone with a photo of your face pulled up on her phone
>>
>>62389960
It already said photos don't work ;)
Nice try anti-social contrarian cuck.
>>
>>62389960
that doesn't work, did you even watch the stream
>>
>>62389998
>>>62389960
>It already said photos don't work ;)
>Nice try anti-social contrarian cuck.
You're right. That's not a concern. We won't be able to even unlock our phones since face is doesn't work.
>>
>>62390086
What? Are you having a stroke?
>>
>>62390086
what?
It checks the 3D depth of your face
>>
>>62389960
You can't have your girlfriend break into your phone if you don't have a girlfriend.
>>
>>62390153
>>>62390086 (You)
>what?
>It doesn't work
Ftfy
>>
>>62390211
what because it's not proper english and I have no diea what you're trying to say
>>
what happens if you put two phones on top together?
>>
>>62390287
wtf do you mean. how high are you?
>>
>>62390406
>>>62390287
>wtf do you mean. how high are you?
Have you been watching the keynote???
>>
>>62390406
>>62390433
yeah, but what happens with wireless charging if I put two iphones on top?
>>
>>62390554
The one with the higher battery charges the one with less power.
>>
>>62390713
yeah but what if they have the same power
>>
>>62390713
so I put on a wireless charger my iphone with 98 % and on top of the iphone my 60% charger and the energy goes through both iphones?
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