Iphone 8

Install gentoo

>>62274815

It must be something physically destructive

>>62274815
lets see, the iPhone IS:
> Water resistant
> the camera protrudes from the back
> bends
> the screen pops
> no headphones jack
> its fragile

>>62274798
heat test,

get people to put it on the stove

claim it won't get hot no matter how long you put it on the stove / leave it in the oven

probably get some good 3rd degree burns out of it too

wireless charging in the microwave

It's been done before but it makes more sense now. Wireless charging will be a thing on this new phone. It won't come with a wireless charger so we might be able to convince eager normies to try it in the microwave.

It's actually true that microwave microwaves are similar to those used to charge your phone iirc, so we can mention that and link studies to "prove" it.

>>62275279

People will remember that instantly, they won't fall for it twice...

>>62275564
>They won't fall for it twice
But they do anon. Time and time again.

>>62275271

> THIS!!!!

God damn!!! You are a genius!!!!!!!! Heat resistant "no more overheating alerts"

idk its water resistant so theres definitely a way to get them to break it thinking its completely waterproof

how about you fuck off phoner

>>62275643
maybe like moving water through the speakers of lightning port charges it idk senpai

Hidden headphone jack inside the sim tray

>>62275572

LMAO, it would be beyond hilarious, but a new and never seen "feature" "revolutionary" would have more chances of making tons of "Idiots" falling for it, IPhones have a history of overhearing "Quantic fluid cooling" promising a phone that will never get over 40°C (lets confuse them with a different temperature scale) no matter what

>>62275688
i like that one

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>mfw apple made the iphone indestructible by normies
>but they will till break after the warranty runs out somehow

>>62275685

People have done that already LOL

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>>62275714

>>62275717
Waterproofing has to be calibrated by pouring water into the SIM tray?

>>62275798
You have to be 18 to post here.

>>62275780

That's actually a good idea, but the oven would cause more damage...

>>62275798
>>>/r/the_donald/

>>62275828
They have good jokes but think you guys are better with ideas regarding tech

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>>62275798
cringe

>>62275901

Did you like the idea or not?

>>62275271
This is accomplished by utilizing the iPhone 7's built in feature iHeat

>>62275941

Exactly! Insert some "it has the revolutionary quantic fluid cooling, the first phone to ever have such system, and BLA BLA BLA BLA" some cool pictures.......

>>62275798
Jesus Christ. Why do I come here anymore.

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>>62276003

>>62275941

Also insert a foreign temperature scale "it won't get over 40°C due to its unique structure and revolutionary feature" god damn the i-diots will believe this, its like if the word "revolutionary" triggers something on their brain and they will believe it no matter what you say

Spectrum analizer on the back camera, can be used to discern the origin of the beans used for your cappuccino¿

>>62275093
Install Arch

>>62276003
If it's ceramic include that

>>62275798
All this but no
>rawr
??????

>>62276160

I haven't seen the specs really, BUT I do think that they will improve the water resistance they already had on Iphone 7 & 7+, it might not damage it that much or even at all, exploiting something that they dont have at all is our best chance, oven, stove, maybe and juust maybe boiling water, I mean if the goal is damage outside the warranty coverage

>>62276251

Normies wont be able to do that, I doubt the average Iphone user will know how to install anything else than iTunes and the average apps

>>62276271

ceramic shielding around battery to improve heat resistance???? I'm mind blown here

You guys are fucking geniuses, but we gotta keep this off the records for now, any private chats we might move on to? Maybe discord?

>>62274798
double screen, back of it pops out to double screen size with bezel less design

>>62276402

But it would be so strange, like, hey, break your phone, inside it you'll see another screen, water, microwave, bend, those trolling ideas worked cuz hey were simple I.M.O. but taking the screen out would be, maybe a stove or oven would work like magic you know, doesn't even require strength or anything, not to mention that everybody has a a stove at home, everybody might think of trying it since its sooo easy

>>62275643
Are the lightning connectors resistant to water with high salinity? Like would it short itself in the sea?

>>62275901
>frogposter
>calling anything cringe

>>62276479

That's actually a good question, I dont know about this particular question, but I know that it cant take depths really well and at least the 7 couldn't be underwater for too long

>>62276512
Maybe if they could somehow be convinced to use their phones below the rated depth, that'd fry the motherbaord for sure

>>62276531

the thing is that nobody knows if the Iphone 8 will be waterproof or continue being just water resistant, if its waterproof it wont be that easy to fry with water indeed but we might have a good chance by putting it in the oven or stove, literally frying it

> LOVED THE IDEA

>>62276637
Yeah it'd work easier if it was only resistant, but IMO anything involving microwave ovens would likely get called out instantly, that shit was already a huge meme in normie circles.

You all guys keep thinking about complicated obvious stuff: just state that the iPhone has some military grade certification that says it can survive some unforgiving fall against concrete. If it's a slab of glass like the Galaxy S8 a lot of people trying the drop test on their own will find themselves with a nice spiderweb on the screen.

>>62276820

not microwave ovens, stoves and shit, with real fire and high temperatures something like "the ceramic inner shell can withstand a temperature of 500F" just wait for kids record themselves burning their phones and recording it LOL

>>62276848

but the warranty might cover that or they'll just replace it by a small price IDK, have you ever head of a waranty that covers setting your device on fire???? that would be so fucking epic

not that your idea is bad tho, but I want more damage LOL some nice and mean trolling

>>62275798
You're not clever, faggot.

>>62276899
Get out

>>62275271
>>62275279
Wireless charging on a stove?
Or maybe say you can charge wirelessly with water.

>>62276868
So like a poor man's wireless charging? If apple doesn't give out a free charging pad for their phones it might work, say that the radiation from the heat of a bonfire would wirelessly charge the phone, and the ceramic would insulate the phone from overheating.

>a phone so sturdy we challenge you to break it
>free replacement and $50 itunes giftcard if you present a broken iphone 8 to your local Mac Store

>>62277033

thats too stupid even for i-diots, I would laugh to my death but they wont fall for it, its just kinda too crazy you know, and it relates to the microwave recharging stuff

Apple employee here, we've already started on the iPhone 9. This phone is going to be a let down and mostly a way for us to do something really awesome for the iPhone 9.

GET HYPE!

>>62277056

> compact rugged structure, new military grade engineering

> ceramic insolated to withstand temperatures as high as 400 F and cooled with a dynamic *or quantic* flud that will cool it down before it gets over 40°C

they will get hyped and confused AF with this I'm sure lel

>>62277093

well, all iphones suck anyways, shittiest phone I ever had, overrated AF

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Make the Iphone 8 (and Apple) an Alt Right symbol.

>>62274798
> I CAN'T AFFORD THESE HIGH-END APPLE PHONES, LAPTOPS AND IMACS
> I'VE NEVER EVEN TRIED ONE AT THE STORE LET ALONE USED ONE YET I'M MAD AT THEM
> I'M SEVERELY DEPRESSED AND MAD AT HOW SHITTY MY LIFE IS
> I'M OUT OF MY AUTISM PILLS TODAY BECAUSE MY ANXIETIES AND MENTAL ILLNESS ARE PREVENTING ME FROM LEAVING MY MOM'S BASEMENT
> I'M NOW SHIFTING ALL THE HATE TOWARDS THINGS I CANNOT HAVE
> I BETTER MAKE ANOTHER THREAD ON AUTISM /g/ENERAL FORUM ABOUT IT SO I CAN FEEL BETTER ABOUT HOW HORRIBLE MY LIFE IS
> I KEEP ON POSTING BULLSHIT MEMES BECAUSE IT'S ALL I CAN DO. JUST LOOK AT THE ARCHIVE AND MD5 OF MY POSTS TO SEE THE LEVEL OF MY ILLNESS
> PS: SOMEONE PLS KILL ME BECAUSE I'M TOO MUCH OF A COWARD TO DO IT MYSELF
> PPS: PLEASE! MY FAMILY IS SICK OF ME AND WANTS ME GONE. JUST HELP ME END IT ALL
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