>you must have 15 years of experience and be under 30 years old

File: wut.png (102KB, 550x495px) Image search: [Google]

102KB, 550x495px

>You must have 5 years experience using a 3 year old language.

>>62272448
Job requirements are basically the company's ideal candidate.
99% won't meet everything they want.
Just apply anyways

I got hired at a place that wanted 6 years experience when I only had 2.

>Master's Degree in Computer Science, Computer Engineering, or similar
>15 years experience
>10+ years of experience with COBOL
>Compensation: $22-25/hr

>>62274589
One word: Pajeet

File: face 034234.jpg (69KB, 306x331px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 306x331px

>>62272448
>Need to have a CS or other STEM/business degree

I fucking hate the private sector.

>you must not be an autistic /g/ shitposting retard

>>62274619
>doesnt have a real degree

>>62274637
No I have a CS degree. I'm tired of having to deal with faggots who know nothing about actual programming but got the job because they know calculus.

>>62274619

I blame HR for this, it doesn't mean you actually need to have a CS degree. Usually they are fine with equivalent education.
Here in Ireland people do just fine (well, more than fine if you consider a 500 euro a day paycheck enough) with just a higher certificate, technologist degree and all. We're in a field created by mostly college dropouts and many professionals who don't have any degree whatsoever working as software enginners.

Just know your shit, thats all they're asking.

>>62274667
>Just know your shit, thats all they're asking.
And don't sperg out during the interview.

I was interviewed by 3 developers, two seniors and a mid, and everything went smoothly.
Did the whiteboard no problem, chatted a bit, pleasant time really.

Then the manager walks in. Apologizes for being late, sits down, and starts asking horseshit HR questions.
I had a sperg out moment. Pretty sure my chances were tanked from there.

>>62274667
>HR

HR whores put engineers in a pedestal, and are a fucking waste of time.

I try to avoid interviews with HR at all costs if I can, I prefer to be filtered by someone who knows their shit.

I mean, before I went to all interviews, now that I have a job (where I was directly interviewed by the CTO twice) I can look for another job avoiding the HR bitches always that I can, if the interview isn't directly with the company I don't fucking go, that simple.

>>62274739
>I had a sperg out moment. Pretty sure my chances were tanked from there.
I'm going to need details, anon.

>>62274739

I sperged once with a manager. I read an forbes article a few days before said interview criticizing some HR questions

>Why should we hire you?
>Why would you set up an interview if you don't even know why you want to hire me? To waste my time?

I was smooth and polite, I told him that with a smile on my face and a goofey tone, but I guess we're both scared of each other, he did end up offering me the job but I got a raise at my current job.

>>62272448
>10 years in Android and iOS deployment.
you fucking wot?

>>62274797
She asked if I had "agile experience."
I told her we do scrum at my current job.
She came back with "I was more interested in your experience with agile than scrum."

So I started talking about the Agile Manifesto and its tenants and how scrum was developed to have a system in place that followed all of the agile tenants.
Then I kinda started to ramble about how "agile" is just the hot new buzzword for managers and most developers couldn't care less.

>Job title requires obscure degrees not even related to it

I remember a small company wanting an app made for mobile devices their clients and workforce could use to connect, track jobs and completion dates etc. and I sent in an offer to do the app for $500 and they sent back requesting my education/past work so I went in to speak to them in person, they wanted me to have a business management bachelors and some other shit... I just left, never spoke to them again. They even sent a follow up email asking if I am still interested... wtf? I am OFFERING to do a job for them, not requesting a fucking payroll job from them. spastic fucks

File: angery564.gif (539KB, 318x400px) Image search: [Google]

539KB, 318x400px

>>62272448
>developer job doesn't require CS degree

Anyone else notice this trend?

>>62275037
yeah, thanks to fucking bootcamps

>>62275037
Its because a CS degree isnt worth the paper its written on.

9 time out of 10 a bootcamp student is better unless the CS degree is from like Stanford or Cal Tech.

>>62275037
I hope you were being sarcastic.

That's like asking for Electronical Engineers to repair TVs, or a Chemical Engineer to make food recipes.

>>62275037
All of the postings around here are "bachelor's degree or equivalent experience."
Finance companies seem to be sticklers for the degree (but the pay the highest in this area).
Logistics companies are a little more lenient, but degree gives you a sizable advantage.
Government contractors don't give a shit, they'll hire you.

This one isn't even a joke, I seriously applied for a job that required you to be a "pre-junior" in college with two years professional software development experience.

I thought they were bluffing, but they sent me a rejection letter because I didn't have two years.

>>62275130

Why didn't you bullshit? If you're confident you can be productive, they won't suspect

>>62275037
I see this a lot:
>Computer Science or similar degree such as Electrical Engineering, Mechanical Engineering, etc.
What the fuck?

>>62275068
I did research and had a doctor mentor me in contributing to systems level open source software during my CS degree. And it is a school I guarantee you have not heard of. And no boot camp is going to teach you systems or calculus.

>>62275130
Just say you have "some college." There is not really any way they can verify that. Most background checks only check for degrees. Not even sure if attendance/admittance is something that they have access to.

File: rage.jpg (45KB, 625x351px) Image search: [Google]

45KB, 625x351px

>>62275152
I did not have a professional ex-employer who would lie for me

>>62275165
CS teaches you all sorts of irrelevant crap that you will never use outside of an academic setting. I can see why a lot of companies would choose bootcamp grads or engineers over CS graduates.

>>62275197
If computer systems and calculus are what you consider irrelevant crap, I really hope you're trolling dude

>Years of experience
>No degree
>Sooo, where did you get your degree in, we didn;t see it on your resume
>I don't have a degree
>oh, ok
>Yea, I've been in the field for years and have worked on hundreds of projects throughout the years
>These are the technologies and systems I work with and manage
>Ok, can we start you off at 92k + bonuses?

>>62275263
Why the fuck is this the only field where this happens? We really need some kind of system like the Bar that prevents non-credentialed software engineers from becoming employed as programmers.

>>62275280
I'm certified out the ass.........

Just no degree

>interview goes great
>getting ready to wrap everything up and head home
>"Just one more thing before we're done anon, we need to do a quick penis inspection"
>no call back
I'm so fucking sick of this shit.

>>62275197

When you enroll a bachelor degree, it is implied that you're interested in an academic career, not exactly to settle down on a middle job, especially on our field.
Personally, I think it's a very toxic trend american job market created, bachelor degree for everything. Plenty of countries already have more job market focused degrees that teaches the craft and trim down a little bit of the theory crap that is not useful unless you're a researcher or something. Those degrees give a generalist approach on the first two years and then closes the scope and specializes the student on a certain stuff.

>>62275298
In the year 2030, this will be the standard process for determing whether or not you can ask a girl on a date.

>>62275280
>anyone applying for a programming job should need a CS degree
yes, good goy!

>>62275322
The whole fucking discipline need massive reform. And they're needs to be regulation on what can be called an engineer.

https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2015/11/programmers-should-not-call-themselves-engineers/414271/

>>62275345
What do you think about network engineers and security engineers?

>>62275353
I have an associates degree and "network engineering" and I can confirm it's a bullshit field. None of those retards have any idea how anything works.

I don't know if about "security engineers" to make a comment, but if I had to take a shot in the dark they can go in the toilet too.

>>62275407
I really derped the fuck out on the post sorry

>>62275407
Can you kind of fill me in on why you think network engineers are a joke?

There might be some who aren't good but what makes the job a meme?

You do you know what a real network engineer does and the kind of solutions that they design and implement?

>>62275345
You sound like a MIT nigger. I'm a hacker, but I call myself a "security specialist" or "security engineer" when applying for a job. It sounds a hell of a lot better than "hacker." Programmers call themselves software engineers for the same reason.

>>62275345

But no sane programmer call himself an engineer.
I thought we were just fine with developer.

I work on HR
i am basically your god lmao

>>62275434
>I'm a hacker

You are a lamer you mean.

>>62275444

A coworker uses in his signature "Web engineer", it is so sad how everyone uses the word so loosely.

If you don't have an engineering degree you are not an engineer, period.

>>62275427
>Can you kind of fill me in on why you think network engineers are a joke?
Here is something a world famous network engineer with a PhD said on the first day of my class with him
>The people who are best with computer are not "computer scientist" but psychologist and other not tech people, because they have the open mind
This guys is world renowned. And African.

>>62275434
Security Specialist is a fine title. Software Developer is a fine title. There is no engineering standards organization that keeps software engineers in check. Most "software engineers" will never look at an IEEE or ISO standard in their fucking life before you bring that up. They aren't held to any standard at all.

>>62275444
The worse the programmer, the more likely they are to call themselves an engineer.

>>62275037
>>62275068
The education system is pretty shitty at teaching programming. Having a degree to begin with doesn't guarantee someone is a good programmer.

I've actually heard stories of COLLEGES introducing students with tools like Scratch and Alice... kid languages that shouldn't even be taught to high schoolers, let alone college students.

>>62275479
>I've actually heard stories of COLLEGES introducing students with tools like Scratch and Alice
My College started off with C++

>>62275479
The only kids language I've heard of a college teaching is Java.

>>62275130
Some employers count hobby projects you create in your own home as "experience", but it depends on the employer.

Developer != Engineer
Programmer != Engineer

...a software engineer does not do what a developer does.

>>62275467
>calls someone a lamer using reddit spacing

>>62275475
I don't really write software nor do the people around me, so I can't speak for devs. But the cyber security industry has rigid standards (for a good reason).

>>/g/62274748

>>62275497
>>62275498
Not all colleges are THAT shitty, but most are shitty nevertheless. The ones that do teach the appropriate languages usually tech outdated methods.

>>62272448
apply anyway dude

don't let that stop you, you have plenty of time to look like a fool at the interview

>>62272448
Lucky for me, my intention is to start my own company and be my own boss, so I don't have to deal with this shit.

>>62274589

>falling for the tech meme
>not falling for the trades meme

shiggydiggy

>>62275479
Even at my community college they didn't start until with alice. Haven't used alice since my freshmen year of high school.

>>62275497
In high school, we had a year-long programming course. They taught us C++ there. In my freshmen year of college, we were taught Alice for a few weeks then Visual fucking Basic. Luckily, I started programming for fun when I was 13.

Is it really that hard to break into the field? I always see this board whining about the application process, but then the newspaper makes it sound like there isn't even enough people on Earth to fill all the software dev/eng positions.
>>62275263
What did they ask you during the technical portion?

>>62275633
we have more then enough people to fill all those positions,
what we lack is cheap foreign slave labor.

>>62275479
The problem is that the private sector wants bullshit webdevs while academia is pushing out engineers who are only really trained to handle desktop software, ancient shit like LAMP stacks, or highly esoteric/abstract stuff that no small or even medium size business actually bothers developing for themselves.

>>62275633
>the newspaper makes it sound like there isn't even enough people on Earth to fill all the software dev/eng positions.

Business whines about this because they want to flood the market and have lower wages for their workers.

>>62275697
You would too if you had to pay 60k/year for a moron web developer who didn't even go to college.

>>62275068
>>62275479
>>62275633
I have had multiple internships during highschool that were private sector, did multiple extracirriculars related directly to the field, and still had no response without a degree

>>62272448
> entry level C developer
> 5 years SQL, Javascript, Node.Js, Angular.js, Java, Android, Swift experience required
> Masters degree required
> C knowledge optional

>>62275479
My college started me off with Java and C++ in my first semester.

>>62275705
>had to pay 60k/year for a moron web developer
>had to
just hire someone else.

>>62275768
That's the thing. There is no one else. Everyone wants that. Only the indians on Upwork will do it for less and they are not reliable when you need to meet a deadline.

>>62275604
>Luckily, I started programming for fun when I was 13.
Same, except I was 12. There hasn't been a single keyword the education system taught me that I didn't already learn myself.

>>62272448
Yes anon prostitution is a demanding profession

>>62275908

Do it yourself like Mark Zuckberg did, then. You'll be a billionaire and it you be your own merit.
Web development is chill and fun as fuck. And I guarantee you'll cum in delight when you look at your own, well polished and beautiful web platform.

>>62275705
>moron web developer who didn't even go to college
>Implying college makes someone a good developer and doesn't just tech basic and outdated shit

Those unrealistic requirements are there so they can say to daddy government "welp, we tried, let us hire Pajeet for slave wages now"

>>62275705
Oh no, you have to pay someone a decent wage, because the job requires skill.

>>62272448
Age requirement? What backwards country are you living in? Link to job description?

>>62275908
That's part of what you're paying for. Reliability. There is more to consider with hiring someone than just "can they do the job".

>>62275908

Well then, accept your fate. If you want a good job, you need to pay what the market demands.

>>62275479

Harvard starts with Scratch and then moves to C in the first few months

>>62274979
>I was more interested in your experience with agile than scrum.
???

Employment is much, much harder than starting your own business. You'll make more money and probably spend half the time, getting clients is hard but trying to play games with autistic losers going over every line of the psuedocode you wrote on the whiteboard test and expecting it to compile is just super autistic quantum bullshit.

>>62276797
starting your own business is easy, following all the tax and business rules and making a profit is not. unless you would kindly enlighten me, or us... please.

Job requirements are set up that way because they likely have an internal candidate lined up, but have an obligation to post the position publicly. Get to know somebody.

>not getting 250k your first year out of college

>>62274951
iPhone: 2007
Android: 2008

That's just on the edge of "reasonable" here. They're pretty much looking for someone who went all-in when the first iPhone was released

>>62275068
Cal Tech class of '04 here, it's pretty shit there too with some exceptions, maybe 4-5 solid professors you are unlikely to have a course with as undergraduates. Almost certainly worse today with the peak-social-justice shit swirl in California generally.

Bootcamps are shit though, you're wasting heaps of money to do what anyone with a 120+ IQ can do on their own for free. In my opinion internet + open source + github basically obviates post-secondary CS education except for graduate level research.

>>62276817
You're on /g/ so you should be able to get into some kind of software development. Profit margin on it is just so high since on your second sale and after you have no development cost. I can't begin to tell you all the horror stories of companies dropping well over $300K on a shitty generic CRM and $5K a month for shit tier support that they hated every step of the way. If you can find your way in for $50K a sale, you're saving them 80% and making all that yourself. Then free $1K a month for life with small maintenance. If you can do this three times you can retire.

>>62272462
This.

Tesla is requiring 8 years of .NET Core experience for a senior level position.

>>62277147
Existing .NET code will compile for .NET Core

>>62277082
Well I have an LLC of my own but have never been able to make any big sales. I would even use similar pricing as companies I've worked at before and instead the response was just a scoff. I have made sales, but nothing worth a damn. In the end I just gave up and went back to being a salaried slave.

File: 1502533857726.png (20KB, 310x317px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 310x317px

>Why we should hire you?
Everytime

>>62276035
i feel like most people who are half-decent at programming at least played with programming in some form or another at this age

I fucked around with Assembly a lot at that age because I actually didn't understand that other programming languages existed

>>62275037
Those are H1B-level dev jobs. The people they bring in *barely* have what qualifies as a US high school education.

>>62275475
>The people who are best with computer are not "computer scientist" but psychologist and other not tech people, because they have the open mind
That is one of the dumbest things I have ever heard. One's proficiency with computers is directly linked to their experience and education related to said computers.

>>62275475
>Most "software engineers" will never look at an IEEE or ISO standard in their fucking life before you bring that up. They aren't held to any standard at all.
Open source developers actually follow standards, but then they also don't call themselves engineers.

The IT field is shit, what other jobs '''require''' you to do hobby projects to show off your competence, other than perhaps art

>>62276880
300k math degree etc

>>62277367
It's impossible for most people to make this happen by cutting their normal source of income because you need to have a lot saved. Do it on the weekends or try to make the sale happen in ways where you can do the work not during business hours for example making a website. The sad part is that almost all of the interest I've gotten so far is not when I try to sell myself as a programmer but when I sell the product and pretend it's tailored towards some industry. Businesses are just this retarded. It's also fun to deal with the quantum bullshit when they ask questions like "What do you mean you can just make your own CRM as one person" because they are ignorant to frameworks existing because they have been taken for a ride this hard by whatever scummy shit generic CRM company they currently have. If they're willing to look at my portfolio and the prices I charged for each then it usually helps but they're so fucked sometimes that they both won't believe you could make it for 1/10th of the price yet pine to be in this abusive relationship of wanting to pay out the ass again for nothing.

>>62277939
Most real engineering jobs will prefer that you have some sort of extracurricular experience.

>>62276817
>following all the tax and business rules
This is easier than you think.

>and making a profit
This is definitely the biggest issue.

>>62277367
Did you start your business hoping you will make sales? Or did you ensure that you have clients/sales lined up for the long term before you started your business?

>>62277939
Engineering is an art.

>>62278133
Hehe, us STEAMfags amirite

>>62275345
I agree, code monkey isn't the same as software engineer.

File: 1460495740370.jpg (200KB, 871x917px) Image search: [Google]

200KB, 871x917px

>>62272448
Oh noooo we couldn't find anyone who meets these requirements to fill the position. Looks like ((we'll)) have to hire h1bs for a fraction of the cost of a citizen employee.

>looking for recent grads
>must have at least 5 years experience in the work force

>>62276961
95% of the reason people go to boot camps is to build a broader network and once they're done they can easily get a job instead of sending resumes into the void.

>>62278537
Some people genuinely believe that you can acquire the skills needed to build a prosperous career in a 2-week bootcamp.

>>62278562

And I believe there are more decent ways to build up a network instead of wasting cash on a hipster campout.

Just get your first grown man job and work your network from there. Make side projects on github, get involved. Its not a chore if you like programming.

Many programmers I know lately hate the very idea of solving a problem. This is like being a journalist that doesnt like to read nor write.

>>62278378
I'm a Russian, I want to emigrate to the first world but I see no point in moving to the USA, the h1b visa doesn't guarantees the citizenship, there're lots of countries where I can get the citizenship after living and working there for a some period of time.

>>62278612
>This is like being a journalist that doesn't like to read nor write.
This is a problem in many fields, these days.

>Hey YOU! Get into THIS career field! Lots of $$$! Oh, and I am going to have your parents push you into it!
>But I prefer something else.
>NO! This field! No other field! Think of the $$$!
>What about my happiness?
>NOOOOO!! This field! I am going to do everything in my power to entice you into entering THIS field!
>Well, I suppose I can try to be happy with the $$$...
Then you get people who are not enjoying their job, and the jobs do not get done half as well. It is very apparent in IT.

>>62275310
Fucking this, in the fifties one person in twenty went to university, now it's fucking everyone, pulling the value of a degree down to nothing, at least half the people I met at university weren't interested in anything, they were just fucking there

>>62275086
Kek, I have a friend who does R&D for a major global food manufacturer with her masters in chemical engineering, believe it or not some of the shit she learned comes in handy

>>62274667
HR are pieces of shit, if they see you don't have a degree be 100% they'll wage cap you until you get one, no matter your skill level.

>>62278562
>skills needed to build a prosperous career in a 2-week bootcamp.
You can, but not in programming. If the bootcamp comes with kneepads, then it is certainly possible.

>>62275507
What does a software engineer do then?

>>62278736

Yeah. I hate HR.
But it is a sweet, sweet irony 'cus everytime they're the ones who wasted their time on a useless skillset. HR wages are mediocre at best and they're being replaced by business grads and administrators.

I didnt know why Michael hated Toby so much on the Office until I kickstarted my career.

File: IMG_1461.jpg (43KB, 600x703px) Image search: [Google]

43KB, 600x703px

>>62275515
haha you failed the meem arrow

>>62275475
>Most "software engineers" will never look at an IEEE or ISO standard in their fucking life before you bring that up. They aren't held to any standard at all.
*cough* Unicode *cough*

>>62275434
>I'm a hacker
>Security specialist
Kek yeah fuck off skid
If your jd isn't vuln research you aren't in computer security, much less a 'hacker'
Come back when you find your first 0day

>>62278968
not him but getting my master's in 9 months, did electrical and computer engineering on bachelor's with classes like computer and network security (that I swear is just Schneier's engineering book but in lectures) and have been on network architecture, pen testing and general comms stuff on master, not a meme university (Southern Yuropoor one though) but pretty much all of it I could've learned by reading books that the proff's rip off.
Unis are only good if you can't learn for yourself. Here they're free though so there's no reason not to get in a good one if you can

>>62279097
You're not going to learn how to RE or pwn from college courses, only a few select top tier schools have any idea about modern binary exploitation, (cmu, rpi, nyu)
If you actually want to develop VR skills join CTF teams and learn shit on your own

I've been applying for jobs for a couple weeks now.

And I constantly come across "junior" functions for people with more than three years experience.

>>62278943
I also had to learn about how floating point was stored in memory.

>>62279139
Often requesting specialized knowledge in the proces, which is easy to learn, but hard to prove you have without experience.

File: 220px-CGNU_Crest.png (36KB, 220x207px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 220x207px

>>62279127
forgot CGNU

>>62279127
obviously, but my argument is that universities teaching you how to secure a network without giving you skills on compromising one are a failed cause.
I've learned 90% of stuff from reading books and applying that crap, not lectures

>>62275280
I studied law. And I'm fairly sure you can get all knowledge you need just by reading some books.

Instead of going to university they might as well show you a list of books and case law to read.

>>62272462
This.

Apply anyway OP.

>>62279243
That's how it used to be in the US prior to the 20th century. All you had to do was pass the bar. In some states that is still the case. Most require law school though. Pretty good idea since it keeps the supply of lawyers artificially low, which is always beneficial.

Don't tell me you retards actually don't bother applying just because you don't meet 100% of the requirements.

>>62279264
Technical interviewers have a habit of humiliating anyone who they feel isn't a 100% fit for the job. I'd rather spare myself the embarrassment.

>>62274663
but CS is hardly about 'actual programming'

>>62279263
I live in the Netherlands and people are very elitist about requiring the appropriate master degree.
But I've encountered enough lawyers to know most work in a specialization they didn't study for.
Which they justify by saying that university teaches you a certain way of thinking. Which is sort of true.

>>62279372
>Which is sort of true
But it's nothing that books can't teach you.

>>62274979
Did you get the durka durk?

>>62274589
> COBOL
Found your problem.

>>62274795
this. One time I got the job but because of company regulations HR won't let me through which is gay

>>62272448
>meets every requirement so far..
>a finished collage degree is a must have

don't get me wrong i am (paid) employed atm for a year now actually but its more or less a meme workplace. so guys, how badly will i be fucked be the salty HR if I tell them that I never even tried collage?

Every time I regret not going into an IT related field I come here to read these treads and I feel better about my education and career choices

>>62275475
>psychologists have an open mind
>which is why their journals are filled with studies with falsified results to fit a preconceived notion of the world

No offense but your professor sounds like a flaming retard.

>African
Oh

>>62278657
Are you retarded? 99% of human history is humans doing jobs they don't want to do to survive and thrive. Passion is a post 2000s meme

>>62274619
Edward Snowden dropped out of high school. Was self-taught. He managed to work for the see-eye-ay and the en-es-ay.

>don't want to trigger the botnet.

>>62272973
This

> worst experience I had: group interview with a bunch of normies talking about McDonald's experience. job was tech support and I was only tech there.

> best experience I had: talked one on one via Skype with interviewer and was quizzed on my technical skills. Got the job immediately.

If it's a group interview, walk out immediately!

>only requirement is to prove that I have at least one mental disorder that seriously inhibits my ability to function in society

got a lifetime of free autismbux easy, now I never have to be a wageslave and am truly free to do whatever I want with my time.

>>62278801
Writes software like a normal developer but gets to feel smug about the title.

>>62283968
>botnet
you triggered it

File: 1481423906209.jpg (35KB, 837x736px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 837x736px

I gave up looking for a job and get disability now. I haven't left my house in about a year.

by 12 yo you're technically able to think for yourself already and should be thinking what you want to do with your life, only those morons americans want to enjoy life and smoke weed and play skateboard all day

just look at the hacking community like the jailbreaking or some bots for mobile game etc, they are all lead by 16-18 yo kids still in high school.

lots of bs coming out from you neets whining about it

>>62274589
>Certified in EPA 608, 410a, and Nate for HVAC-R
>1 year experience (trade school counts)
>Compensation: 18-30/hr

Damn it feels good not to fall for the college debt meme

>>62285974
how oppressive,
people shouldnt decide what they want to do until they are at least 25.

File: 6bb21971745612942cffb766214b0bf5--cthulhu-pepe.jpg (34KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 500x500px

>>62272448
>tfw not prenatal programmer

This thread is good. Fuck HR

>>62272973
>requirements are NON NEGOTIABLE
>if you do not fill all the requirements you will be BLACKLISTED

>>62279276
If they had no intention of hiring you, they wouldn't even call you in.
You realize how many people apply?
Even if they're lazy fuckers, every second of the time they set aside for interviews is booked solid.

>>62274979
>she
I would rather live under the bridge than have a female manager again. Seriously fuck females in management.

>>62279276
I have done well in these interviews

I'm at over 100k and my last interview (current employer) actually asked me a question on certain technology, I told them I don't have experience with that technology and have not been exposed to it

They gave me the job anyway and said well now is the time to learn, when can you start etc...

>>62272448
>>you must have 15 years of experience and be under 30 years old
Bullshit. No employer would stipulate this.

>>62274913
alpha af

>>62274913
You did good anon. They deserved to be called on that type of shit.

>>62274979
Agile is an absolute fucking cancer on the industry and you dodged a bullet by not working for a company that swallowed all the bullshit whole.

>>62272448
I graduated in NY and got certs from respectable places including experience while in college and a internship at a big name place (doesn't hire interns, policy). It's been 1 year and a half and I can't get any fucking job. I want to fucking sleep and never wake up again

It's always
>No Response (i.e. google, Microsoft, Facebook)
>Overqualified (Multi million and billion dollar holding companies and investment firms)
>We found someone else (code word for we got a referral for someone and you're basically non existent)

Thanks for reading my blog /g/ because I want to fucking die and have no one to complain about this

>In before can you move
I can't.

Daily reminder Snapchat is literally filled with stereotypical out of the book Chads and Stacys that discriminate against qualified candidates

>>62272462
It's weird because I saw an ad just like that not two days ago.

>>62275497
>>62275604
starting off with sepples is equally horrific.

sepples is WAY too complicated to be pushed on newcomers, but I guess it's being pushed on people because OOP and all that trendy shit

>>62288575
>No Response (i.e. google, Microsoft, Facebook)

Those companies are looking through thousands of applicants at a time, start applying to lots of smaller companies. Literally anything you're qualified for.

>>62276215
>H1B lobbying intensifies

>>62277082
Development cost is always amortized over time or units sold. You dont just write it off on the first unit.

File: fr.jpg (35KB, 500x412px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 500x412px

>>62281683
>making life choices based on /g/ shitposting
Dude...

>>62275280
The only thing degree requirements do is force people into debt prior to getting a job.

Degree requirements are not about competence, they are about non-sensical requirements and ticking a box to tick a box. Anyone with half a brain hires on ability, not checkmarks.

HR is universally staffed by retards, which is why there are any degree requirements for anything in the first place.

>>62288707
It's also a cheap way to filter through graduate candidates. You spend years putting yourself into debt for the sole purpose of having someone consider giving you a phone interview.

>>62288509
What's wrong with agile. Is SCRUM cancer too? I..k-kinda like it.

>>62275280
>programmer certification
And your license expires 3 years after you've been instated, right?
The certs industry is one gigantic fucking self-serving scam after another, it's almost as bad as higher education.

>>62288575
>It's been 1 year and a half and I can't get any fucking job
Is USA really that fucked up?

>>62281800
This. Any passion that won't enrich you enough to escape the urban or rural underclass is not worth pursuing. Maybe it was back when affordable housing meant slightly high-time-preference people who had bad luck, but these days it means career criminal predators you don't want to be anywhere near.

>>62288617
>Those companies are looking through thousands of applicants at a time, start applying to lots of smaller companies. Literally anything you're qualified for.
That's why I mentioned

>We found someone else (code word for we got a referral for someone and you're basically non existent)

This category literally falls in every fucking tech and non tech job from startups to store retail to fucking literally under the fucking planet I'm able to do with my skills.

Like I said, I want to fucking cease existing on this planet. If I had the balls to die I would but I don't. Mind you, most of my job applications start from the bottom up. Very few of my applications are with the big boys since the big boys rarely post a shit ton of jobs. That and I never hear from them anyway. I'm more bitter at the smaller places that reject me.

My existence and birth was must've been a mistake. Thanks for hearing me cry about it. I began talk to myself and cry myself to sleep everyday because of this. In fact, I'm crying right now

>>62288762
The whole lot is cancer. The original Agile manifesto was quite reasonable, but it's now just a way to screw gullible corporations out of millions in consultancy fees and books.

In return they end up with a bureaucratic abomination which has no resemblence to the original manifesto whatsover.

>>62288823
It took me 8 months of dicking around to get a job out of university. Keep on applying to anything you're even semi-qualified for and take it easy. Go find a hobby project to work on and do some exercise too.

>>62285974
>by 12 yo you're technically able to think for yourself already and should be thinking what you want to do with your life, only those morons americans want to enjoy life and smoke weed and play skateboard all day
No this attitude is also prevalent here in Middle Europe, or Germany and France at least, I don't travel so much. Every young person is also passionate for something but often they are not following this due to affliction with drugs and stupid social things. Much of them grow up and live with parents or on benefits or collect a salary for harassing public officials from linke.

>>62279264
>>62288389
I did this now I'm fucked. My programming skills are shitty and there's at least 100 other candidates. I'm going to die in the technical interview

>>62289042
>I'm going to die in the technical interview

Go find something to work on in the language of your choice. If you can write 100 lines of reasonable quality code then you're better than 99% of candidates already.

>>62288701
Makes about as much sense as predicating those choices on the "Tech News," articles which are all bought and paid for by companies, ad firms, and social engineers. You're always being lead or mislead somehow. At least on /g/ there's no pretense of authority or objectivity. You know everyone is just another anon who might be someone or might be a worthless NEET.

Can't say I've ever made a big life choice based on posting here, but I've definitely found a lot of the memes here are more accurate descriptions of reality in my industry than most of the official reports you might read in the e-periodicals.

>>62288812
Take any given european country
spread it out so it's the size of america
that's how far apart all your major cities, businesses, manufactoring plants etc. are now

You can be the best software engineer but lack for a job because you live in montana instead of california

>>62288575
>No Response (i.e. google, Microsoft, Facebook)

Kek. Are you too mighty to work at a smaller company? There's literally thousands of jobs, but you only have a handful in mind.

>>62288575
>In before can you move
>I can't.
Why not?

>>62289372
>Are you too mighty to work at a smaller company? There's literally thousands of jobs, but you only have a handful in mind.
See
>>62288823

Most of my apps are in smaller companies, I rarely apply to the bigger companies due to their infamy of not getting a response. I'm just listing the kinds of rejections I get. Most of which is those telling me I'm overqualified or that they found someone else

>>62289545
Personal circumstances

>>62274663
.t brainel who cant into calculus

>>62278150
Fuck no. Arts and technology degree goes straight in the trash in my eyes

File: 212121.png (347KB, 396x524px) Image search: [Google]

347KB, 396x524px

>>62278735
>R&D

Wow you actually think this is what I was referring to, I was more into the lines of making simple recipes for a local restaurant or if you want, simply cooking.

File: disappointed_pepe.jpg (7KB, 250x242px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 250x242px

I thought any autist could easily get a tech job just by having some spare-time projects and some open source contributions.

By /g/ the tech job-market sounds absolutely hellish. Guess I shouldn't have been a depressed neckbeard jack-off all those years. Might be too late now.

>>62290177
No it's not that bad. If you want a tech job and are at least somewhat skilled then you can get one pretty easily you just have to deal with being lowballed by small companies who will work you to the bone on their shitty systems.

File: 734623522.png (10KB, 788x202px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 788x202px

Should I apply for it /g/?

>>62291999
>entry level
>10-12+ years experience required

>>62291999
Sure. Say you saw the seniority level and assumed the experience requirement was a typo.

>>62291999
trips says you'll get the job

>Rockstar guru ninja wizard

File: squid_chan_wtf_am_i_reading.jpg (60KB, 680x632px) Image search: [Google]

60KB, 680x632px

>>62291999
>Server side code UI
>CSS3
>Javascript
>RTOS

Jesus christ what are they doing

>>62292104
Probably used indian contractor after indian contractor until they ended up with a total abomination.

>>62291184
I live this life and I love it.

>>62288599
what fucking decade are you from?

>>62272462
This is not even a joke, I read a job posting that requires 5 years experience working with React last night.

>>62288590
Snapchat is shitty software created for a purpose so banal and retarded that its existence is practically malignant.

It's worthless socialmediaware that succeesed due to marketing and soc.engineering, not technical expertise. Why would you expect it to be managed and worked on by anything other than turbochads and 100IQ sluts?

>>62272448
I did read my first programming book at 9 and at 10 I did already program in four different qbasic variants. At 11 I approached C.
In all honesty, if by the venerable age of 18 the better you can handle is some python, meme PHP and a little of copy-pasted javascript just find another career and keep IT as an hobby. Or it will be extremely painful. For you.
>>62286173
>not a real degree
maybe in Easter Europe it would be fashionable. No, wait, even there niggers don't run in debt if they want to get academic education.
Ten years from now and you'll sorely regret most of your current smugness

File: Screenshot_2015-06-03-21-44-33.png (1MB, 1080x1920px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1080x1920px

>tfw got hired after an internship
>basically no interview experience if I ever decide to look for another job

Are technical interviews hard?

>>62292242
>Snapchat is shitty software created for a purpose so banal and retarded that its existence is practically malignant.
yet the creator made over $54M and he's on a lifetime permanent vacation with his family thanks to his [trigger warning] innovation. If that's so simple why aren't you a billionaire already?

>>62290177
get yourself to a large city, there's going to be a company somewhere that will pay you pretty well to specialize. it probably wont be much fun but it beats a mcjob, you get free training, and you can easily get something better after a year or two.

don't give up

File: 1503935672026s.jpg (5KB, 224x225px) Image search: [Google]

5KB, 224x225px

>>62272448
That's what you get for not dreaming in code

File: 34645156145455214.jpg (144KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]

144KB, 1000x1000px

>Want a job in information security
>you are required to know basic python,cisco servers,windows servers, and databases,computer forensics software,ethical hacking,and linux systems

Im fucking scared since the classes were all fucking beginner classes and I am effectively being a master of none but I forgot half the shit they taught me since I have learn something new next time

>>62272462
They must be wanting to hire the people that invented the language

>>62292490
If your going for security you should not be required to do all of that shit at most you probably just mess around in firewalls all day I think its so you know what happens behind the scenes

File: 56ImTYV.jpg (65KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 400x400px

>>62277429
>Why we should hire you?
>Well... the better question is "Why I should work in YOUR company"

>>62272462
>not time-warping to get experience over repeat periods

>>62274611
>Pajeet
>ancient language almost exclusively used for legacy systems

>>62272448
Apply anyways you faggot. Here is how corporate America works, X team wants to hire a new person. They send it off to HQ with a general description of the job. HR is normally filled with sjw women who know shit about the job you are applying for if it is tech related.

That said it is a numbers game and even if you don't meet the requirements you might get an interview.

>>62291999
Node.js running on a risc cpu

>>62285538
Never ever get a job, seriously. It destroys you mentally and physically. You either break and become an unthinking slave or end up shooting yourself in the face.

>>62276817
Years of school and stories about cops shutting down lemonade stands make me paranoid that if I tried to start a business I'd get quickly taken down by some "how the hell was I supposed to know that" regulation.

Doesn't help that I'm interested in drones and the FAA's been trying their hardest to keep that industry down.

File: 1477711224529.jpg (124KB, 760x1082px) Image search: [Google]

124KB, 760x1082px

>>62277429
>what does success mean to you
>tell us about a time where you...

I've made my peace with the corporate world as a whole, but I'll never not despise the middle-management/HR world of mission statements, personality tests (I've had companies tell me to do one online before going to the college co-op interview), and velvet-glove bullshit that makes me long for an Enron-style sociopath as my boss.

>>62293386
Mission statements are so dang retarded.

>>62291999
What a fucking roller coaster of a job ad. I'd stay far away from that shit. It smells of "we have no idea what we're doing but we only have 36k budgeted for a new employee".

>>62288305
>Blacklisted from companies that will fail in the next 5 years

I don't see the problem

>>62272462
They want time travelers only

>>62291999
>10-12+ years of experience required

Most programmers quit after that time

>>62274667
>500/day
500x4=2,000/week
8,000/month
96,000 euro for a low level IT job?
FUCK OFF LIAR

>>62297189
Also, yes I'm aware the normal thing is 5 days a week working, but 4 made my point just as well.

>you must have 30 years of experience and be under 15 years old
FUCK

desu getting a job is actually piss easy. i found i used to think it was difficult but i wasnt actually applying for any. i was just being a neet hikikomori.

>>62297274
how about getting a job that doesnt make you want to off yourself? how difficult is that?

>>62297287
took me a day to get one that i find alright.i have no proper qualifications and applied. got a casual position and they just offered me a full time position. idk if ill go for it or not.