/g/ stupid tech stories

>>61161966
Here's one. It's hard to believe, but it really happened.

>browsing /g/
>some idiot starts a stupid tech stories thread
>does not include a stupid tech story

>>61162617
I would but I always get overly criticized so I thought to avoid it this time.

>hey anon we want to clean up our asset list in our SQL based application
>remove these from "the system"
"So you want these gone from the asset list, right?"
>yes
"OK"
>>days later someone notices the assets are no longer selectable to assign work orders too
>OH THIS MUST MEAN THEY ARE GONE FOR GOOD, FUCK THEY ARE GONE AND ALL THE WORK ORDERS
>WHAT DO WE DO SHOULD WE ASK THE SOFTWARE VENDOR OR EVEN OUR EMPLOYEE (me) THAT KNOWS MORE ABOUT THE SYSTEM THAN ANYONE ELSE?
>NAH FUCK THAT LETS PANIC AND CALL IT AND HAVE THEM DO A FULL WEEKS ROLLBACK
So I clock in-
>WTF ANON WHY ARE HUNDREDS OF OPEN ORDERS AND WORK TICKETS GONE AFTER WE DID A SYSTEM ROLLBACK
>RE ENTER ALL OF THESE BY HAND ASAP
"why was this done"
>YOU DELETED THE SERVICE HISTORY ON THESE (more panic)
"the service history is there, if you want then categorized again per asset just re type the 10 assets back into the system as searchable fields"

So I called IT and undid the restore, we lost half a days worth of stuff. Got more or less blamed for it all even though I unfucked it.

File: 83459934958247.png (64KB, 200x200px) Image search: [Google]

64KB, 200x200px

>be me
>summerfag
>last days of hs for first year
>gets straight a's in MISTA (microsoft learning stuff)
>certify in every 2013 microsoft program
>became a master certified
>hellyas.bmp
>end of class, walk to last class for the day
>get into class
>nigger alert
>fellow classnig comes up to me and talks
>"DAYUM NIGGA U REAL SMART WITH TECH YOUSA FUKIN HACKER"
>wut
>"CAN U TRACK DOWN IPS N SHIT BOYY"
>uh no
>"I KNOW U LYING NIGGA"
>"YOUSA FUCKIN HACKER AT DIS SHEIIT"
>continues to laugh my sides off into orbit as nonsense talk is repeated again and again to me
>try to tell him i'm not that smart
>ignores it and still thinks i'm a hacker to this day
>mfw he called me a hacker that could hack into people's ips
>mfw he doesn't know what an ip is

>>61164303
did he ask you to unlock any phones?

>>61164351
Sadly no, if your wondering the reason he asked me about "being a hacker" is because he was in the class i master certified in, and afterwards he believed because of that i was a master at hacking as well.

>>61164376
so what is your job title good sir?

>>61164393
haven't gotten one yet, looking forward to getting a technical engineer job or as an IT

>>61164393
Master Hacker

>>61164409
anon you're clearly this >>61164437

>>61161966
I had a client call in a month ago at 4:50 on a friday
>>We have a serious bug problem in our office
jesus fucking christ i want to go home
>>We have an ant problem
>W-what
>>I thought it was on the outsite of the monitor but it was on the inside. There's a stain and i need a new monitor
I recommended him a exterminator and would not give him a new monitor until his office was fumigated.
the tech i sent out reported back that the office smelled like poison when he pluged in the new monitor.

>>61164437

Without looking it up, name at least 4 x64 registers.

You'll look them up anyway.