Fake Tech Ads

>>59664291
>IPhone
>IOS
>shitty font
Try harder

>>59664324
this

I like your idea though OP

At least paste in a fucking iPhone 7. Not some disgusting render from some shithead on the internet. Font is way off too. Apple doesn't put their logo at the bottom of an ad, colors etc.

>>59664291
shitty grammar and a played-out joke. don't worry though--when you share it on twitter, someone will post a joking reply claiming they did it and you can screencap and post it in "/g/ humor" threads forever

>>59664291
Just fix the case of "iPhone" and do this >>59664356
Also use an ultralight Myriad Pro or the San Francisco font.

File: rect4281-7.png (120KB, 1200x900px) Image search: [Google]

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Here's a template with an actual iPhone 7, OP. I suggest you change the text to something filled with buzzwords and correct the mistakes anon pointed out.

>>59664798

Impact Proof.

With iOS 10.3, Your iPhone will now sense when it drops and use taptic feedback to cushion the fall.

Good Bye. Broken Screens. Bulky Cases.

Hello World.

>>59664870
Hmmm, needs more buzzwords like:

http://www.apple.com/macbook/

>>59664291
fix the shitty fonts and you'll definitely fool some people.

i mean, you could spread it right now and it would work, but easy to improve.

>>59664291
Well, it has certainly convinced me that you're a fucking retard.

>>59664348
>>59664856
Hey son of a Rundjeet, go shit on your streets instead.

What if it was the red iPhone instead? So that way it'll sound more like a hardware change rather than a software one.

>>59665161
fuck off you retard

>>59665216
less chance of people falling for it since only a few bought the aids variants

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>>59664348

>>59665316
nice contribution to the thread fuckwad

>>59665324
It's ok buddy anything to bump a shit thread

>>59665221
>>59665324

Don't post so obviously without your tripcode you retard fuck.

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>>59664798
How's this?

What would be a good font for the paragraph of buzzwords?

Give me suggestion guys, OP left us all with blue balls and seeing this thread 404 without achieving anything would break my heart. I can dance a little in inkscape and gimp but I need your help.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgHNtzxO0y8

>>59665690
nobody else is contributing

>>59665705
He just needs to learn his lesson. It's like feeding a stray animal

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>>59665653
use helvetica neue for the font, try to have the least amount of bold possible. Soft gradient on the background, memeword it up

>>59665751
Man who gives a fuck, he's the only one who posted something worth a shit and you're just gonna shoot him down because he's a tripfag? You're pathetic.

>>59665580
It's not the right font

>>59665580
Looks good
Use this >>59665753 for the buzzwords

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>>59664870
>>59665753
>>59665797
How about this?

>>59665753
>soft gradient
elaborate

>>59665921
still looks wrong
Look at apple's website, mimic that aesthetic exactly

>>59665921
Literally so shit, fuck man just give up and try a new hobby

>>59665962
>>59665921
Even better, go to Apple's website and check out the page source to figure out the exact fonts they use

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>>59664291
2/10

You spelled product names wrong, used a fake iPhone picture, and used a low quality Apple logo that looks like you pasted it from the browser to MS Paint. It's fucking terrible. So one point because you tried and another point because the idea is decent.

>>59665580
It's still bad. Get rid of all text and type the following.

>Introducing Apple Impact
>an all new system designed to protect your iPhone 7
>Impact uses the latest accelerometer, gyroscope, and air pressure sensing hardware technologies. The latest software update has activated Impact in every iPhone 7 and 7 Plus. Impact will activate as soon as you drop your iPhone face down, and will power off key components to prevent any hardware or software damage.

>>59665844
Zozzle.

>>59665947
nevermind that, do what >>59665962 said and study their flat aesthetic. Impact-proof sounds goofy swap it for iResist,

Now introducing iResist with iOS 10.3 your iPhone can now resist drops up to 50ft! This is done by using microsensors inside your iPhone to sense when it has been dropped, it cuts power and allows the phone to bend a little to curve the damage.

>>59666021
brilliant, will do

>>59666054
fuckfuck I just thought of a better one. Endurance (Tm) iResist sounds too much like 2010

>>59666054
When was the last time actually used the i~ prefix in a new product or feature?
That being said it probably doesn't matter because it's still what normies associate with apple

>>59666054
>Now introducing iResist with iOS 10.3 your iPhone can now resist drops up to 50ft! This is done by using microsensors inside your iPhone to sense when it has been dropped, it cuts power and allows the phone to bend a little to curve the damage.

This is not apple's marketing language at all. Try again.

>>59665921
get Myriad Pro Light and Thin weights to get the same style of Apple's marketing material.

>>59666050
I think I'll try what you said first.

>>59666100
Don't include an exact iOS version. Making it purposefully vague will allow us to milk it longer and rake in more lols.

I get it...

they don't use 100% black text

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>300%
300% very really a lot much convincing

>>59666124
Nope. Just look at the site and copy it as closely as you can. Also be sure you paid attention to this >>59666124 and don't include times or dates.

>>59666124
Just say "with the latest iOS update"

"Resist" is also not a very apple name because the word has political activist connotations, it's not neutral enough

>Introducing PROTECT
>With the latest version of iOS, iPhone is able to protect itself from drops of up to 50ft.
>When a strong impact is detected, iPhone will power off key components to prevent any hardware or software damage.

>>59666050
Zooooooozzzzzzllllleeeeee

>>59664856
why can't tripfags kill themselves

>>59666301
>transparent background
>(tm)

Never refer to the iPhone as "your iPhone". Apple does not do that. You have to refer to it as if it's a standalone entity, just "iPhone" like in >>59666212

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whoops, fuck up the gradient but i fixed it now

>>59666254
This

>>59666332
>wrong typeface
no, no, no, no, NO!

>>59666329
So "the iPhone"?

>>59666339
arghhh, it looks better than helvetica at least.

Is the paragraph font at least okay?

What font should I use for the big letters?

>>59666332
Missing a period after the first line

>>59666332
http://www.fontpalace.com/font-download/MyriadPro-Light/

>>59666352
I have it, what should I use it for? The whole text or just the big letters?...

>>59666348
i sent you the link at >>59666352
heading should be black or a dark gray.

>>59666340
No, just "iPhone" on its own.
TM does not need brackets, it doesn't go in a circle.
>iPhone 7 and 7 Plus
needs to be "iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus". You can't shorten this.
Don't use different letter spacing on different lines, it makes it look even worse than it already is

>>59666301
The trademark thingy should not be in quotes and there needs to be a comma in that first line between iPhone 7 and Impact.

>>59666332
Better but see >>59666339 and we need more bullshit to fill in that white space at the bottom. Maybe a couple blue links that say "watch the video" and "learn more". Take screenshots of the links from Apple's website.

>>59666361
>>59666352
oh crap, that was the older design.
Newer ads are using San Francisco Display Medium or Regular:
https://github.com/AppleDesignResources/SanFranciscoFont

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Oh my fuck! FUCKING DUMBASSES!

YOU GUYS NEED USE SAN FRANCISCO FONT!

YOU GUYS CAN UNDERSTAND? SAN FRANCISCO FONT!

For fuck's sake!

>>59666351
>>59666400
roger that

>>59666386
font is invalid :(

You need a better picture of the phone
Get one of those ones of the phone on an angle, and use a gradient to make a ground looking thing so it looks like the phone's making impact with the ground (while not at all showing any signs of impact or damage)

File: helvetica-standard.jpg (116KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

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>>59665580
Use helvetica standard

>>59666400
>4chan-b-random-board.gif

>>59666415
>font is invalid :(
nani?

WHY DID THEY CHANGE THE FONT AGAIN

FUCK

AFAIK MBPs use a accelerometer to protect the HDD, it's called "Sudden Motion Sensor". Perhaps we should try that name for the "shock resistant" thing.

This is quite possibly the worst attempt at once of these iphone pranks that I've ever seen

>retards in charge of graphics design

>>59666428
All fonts are invalid when I try to install them in my Windows 7 "SP2" computer.

>>59666332
this is a really shitty idea to begin with

Use the Impact font for maximum impact

>>59666436
seriously, this shit is leddit tier

how hard is it to copy the exact fucking don't they use from the website

you're all fucking retards

>>59666446
At least reddit has qualified photoshoppers when it comes to making something like this.
This is plain neo/g/-tier, not even remotely close to /b/

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>>59666456

>>59666441
w7 in 2017 is quite mong tier

>>59666415
that's weird, Linux and Windows 7 accepted the font
Try this:
https://www.anonfiles.cc/file/caff7bb80e103a7c3698e90882c0bc65

>>59666446
>>59666466

and it's not even a good concept for a prank.

>>59664291
One of those, looks good on paper ideas

>>59666470
Not bad, maybe we should show the taptic device.
And avoid "impact proof", prefer "impact resistant"

>>59666470
desu looks clean but I don't think Apple would actively discourage or acknowledge "bulky" cases, especially after their retarded battery case

>>59665844
now this, is shitposting

>>59666470
Ditch the "Your" in "Your iPhone 7" and condense the frame a bit so there's less empty space and it'll be as good as it this idea can get

I might have to leave soon guys so here's the SVG in case anyone wants to continue my work.

my.mixtape.moe/alwfdw.svg

>>59666474
it worked, thanks a million m8

>>59666478
Wasn't there a waterproof software update prank when iPhone 4 came out?

>>59666507
this anon >>59666470 did better than you on his first try
you've got much to learn

>>59666470
>Dot in title
Try again

>>59666432
My ThinkPad T400 is the only laptop I have with a HDD still. Sometimes when I pick it up quickly I hear a soft click inside it where the hard drive is. I feel like it's the platter wiggling around but I know how securely anchored they are in there. Is that what's happening though?

>>59666518
yes and that was a genuinely good prank

>>59666525
tru, though I find this all fun desu

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old one

>>59666532
yep, thats the Active protection system doing its work

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okay i don't have to go yet so i tried it like >>59666470

>>59666622
how the fuck do you keep fucking up the font every single time

>>59666622
The image needs to be a social media friendly dimension
https://makeawebsitehub.com/social-media-image-sizes-cheat-sheet/

>>59666622
Hello world. This is
iPhone 7

>>59666622
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

LEARN HOW TO GRAPHICS ARTS

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not real me >>59666622

Anyway here is an updated version of what I was working on.

>>59666661
It's getting better. A lot better. Links need to be blue.

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I can't really remember, did apple ads used to look like this? I know lots of people actually fell for this one.

>>59666675
the paragraph looks better now but the heading is still f***d up
AFAIK Apple doesn't use (TM), they directly register any marketing name.

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>>59666675
It's almost finished.

>>59666684
It's the right font but apple have never done boxes like that. Looks almost like material design.

>>59666675

this one >>59666470 is better than yours in every way

>>59666709
I don't know mang. I mean it looks good but it doesn't feel like this is how aplel would introduce their newest gimmick...

>>59666709
No it's not. Fuck off.

>>59666709
shut the fuck up

>>59666675
That heading is still the wrong fucking font
your framing of the text is amateur as fuck. There should be some vertical centering, right now everything's pushed up too high and you've got a massive white space at the bottom

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>tripfags impersonating tripfags
They're evolving...

>>59666675
You're missing the smug one-liner slogan. "Introducing Apple Impact" is the first line of a paragraph, not a heading

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>>59666777
Dude nice

>>59666784
Holy shit that really activated my almonds anon.

What should the one liner be?

>>59666804
this one >>59666470

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oh shiiieeet, we're almost done

>>59666817
hmmm, is that really the best?

>>59666839
Work on the vertical spacing, there should be equal gaps from the left edge to the iphone, from the iphone to the text, and from the text to the right edge

>>59666851
thanks, I'll do that

>>59666850
It's smug, concise and declaratory
Make sure to use a thicker weight font as well, there's no reason for the body text to be thicker than the heading

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>>59666851
>>59666869
How about this?

SVG file here:

https://my.mixtape.moe/zkfxno.svg

>>59666978
Still looks wrong. If that's really the sanfran font then you've fucked up the character spacing

>>59666996
shit sorry, i forgot to change it. it was myriad pro btw

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>>59666996
there

>>59667027
The thing I said about character spacing still applies. Look at the headings on apple's website.

What about "Brace for Impact"?

>>59665324
>>59665221
>>59664856
>>59664348
tripfag stop

>>59667042
"Braced for impact" makes more sense. Apple doesn't command you to do things, it makes bold statements about its own products.

>>59667027
>>59666839
>>59666978
Looks like shit, just stop trying

They've also stated doing two or three word double entendres (for lack of a better description) so maybe something like "Impact. Full." or "Drop. Everything."

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>>59667035
My time's up m8, truly sorry I am. Hope you or someone else will be able to finish this.

2 more renders coming up and I'm gone. Goodbye everybody, it was really fun being in this thread.

>>59667045
>>59667068
then why don't you make it better mr.perfect?

>>59667097
fuck off retard

>>59664291
iMpact*

>>59667081
Impact. Full. doesn't work because "full" doesn't make sense on its own
Drop. Everything. doesn't work because apple would focus on the protection features, not the act of dropping the phone. Protection makes people feel secure, Dropping makes people think of fear. "Everything" on its own has no relevance to the feature that's trying to be promoted.

>>59667097
You don't have to let everyone know you're leaving
We'll realize it once the thread gets better

>>59667107
Why did you reduce the heading's weight? We already established the heading should be bolder than the body text.

>>59667120
That heading is too long, reduce the font size so it's smaller than the width of the body paragraph

>>59667056
>>59667120
definitely this one.
seems to take a lot of space though.

>>59667107
This is pretty good.

>>59667128
>expecting a tripfag to be able to handle simple instructions
you're expecting too much

>>59667128
It felt right for some reason, sorry if it's now fubar, it wasn't intentional. bye

>>59667133
turn your trip back on you aren't fooling anyone

>>59667152
kek

>>59667120
You do realise that you made this in CMYK mode right? The greens of the screen look like muted shit because it isn't RGB

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>>59667107

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I have no confidence that this will work in any capacity but at least it's the right font
The iphone needs to be replaced with an image that wasn't converted to CMYK colors

>>59667191
Just go with this. Any retards who fall for this aren't likely to pick up the subtle differences between it and legitimate Apple ads.

>>59664291
Use Helvitica, Use a Vector Apple Logo
It's iPhone, Not IPhone.
correct the gamma levels between the background and the phone image

>>59667097
Why is son of Rundjeet such a retarded piece of absolute shit?

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>>59667204
>at least it's the right font
no it's not you downie, wrong version of San Francisco

how fucking hard is it to copy pic related, JUST grabbed the shit from Apple site

about to learn gimp for this shit

>>59667224
IIRC Apple uses a font called "San Francisco" now.

>>59667227
You know he's a mason, right?

>>59667231
Tell me specifically which sanfran weight to use then

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>>59667249
https://my.mixtape.moe/azsqpy.zip

internet decided to take a dump

>>59666622

Mentally retarded.

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>>59667385
I was using semibold, pic related is bold.
I'm still not convinced by this thing honestly

>>59667120

Stop fucking posting you retarded tripnigger.

The irony of this thread. 160 posts in and not a single person can even create a fucking SINGLE presentation slide that looks like it came from Apple's simple as fuck designed iPhone info page. I don't know who's dumber, the 14 year olds who fall for this or all of you who can't even make the bait in the first place.

>>59667420
you replied anyway :^)

>>59664291
>Iphone 7
>not iPhone 7
Dude are you a special kinda retard?

>>59664348
why dont you kill yourself?

>>59667120
Embarassing attempt.

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>>59665921
>Good Bye.
>Broken Screens.
>Bulky Cases.

this is fucking terrible and you should feel terrible. learn english faggot and actually try or kys m8

>>59665921
The color is wrong, apple doesn't use pure black.

retards just look at apples website css.
you are all dumb as shit desu

>>59665921
you're not even trying

>>59666332
who is this shitty trip?

>>59670475
red retard
apple hater and literally 14 year old

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Is this >>59667423 the best we can do, /g/?

Is there nothing more we can improve?

>>59670704
it's a pretty shitty idea honestly
People dropping their iphones is something they do without being told to already

>>59670712
But now they'll be more carefree and we can drink the river of tears they make when they complain about the latest update not working.

Though I'm still not sure if we should have put the ios version of the update or not...

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for fuck's sake guys, try harder

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I can do a better job than the tripfag

>>59670999
Change it to say "iPhone" on its own instead of "your iPhone", apple treats the iPhone as if it's an entity and not some possession you own
Change it to a more social media friendly dimension - either a square or a horizontal rectangle, the vertical rectangle you've got is the least social media friendly shape possible

Just inspect element the actual Apple page you insufferable morons.

That's how >>59665844 looks so real despite the text

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>>59671003
kek

>>59667452
this. it would take me literally 10 minutes to make a passable pic with proper syntax.

>>59665705

Doesn't matter. Better a dead thread than a trip thread.

PSA: Don't forget to filter all trip codes.

>>59670999
This guy knows his shit

>>59664870
>taptic feedback
This has to be used. It is too good not to be used.

>>59664363
true
/g/ thinks they're 'trolling' the masses with these fake ios ads but the normies are the ones that are getting a ruse out of us

>>59664291
What's the point of this? at least with the microwave thing dumb people would microwave their phones. no one will see that ad and think 'let's try dropping my phone!'

>>59671221
>doesn't contribute
>shits up the thread
You're twice as cancerous as the tripfags.

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/gd/ here. I'm just laughing my anus off at you guys trying so hard to make a simple little fake promo and failing at even that.

>>59670999
We've cracked uncrackable.

Apple would of literally paid an advertising firm 10 million to come up with that.

>>59664291
Too many commas, run-on sentence.

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>>59671003

>>59664291
The sentence is fucking retarded and looks like it's written by a middle schooler

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>>59671003
wunderbar

>>59667423
it only has to work once.

>>59671003
Use more social media friendly dimensions, then it'll be perfect.

>>59672563
Do social use thumbnails or just crop a portion of the image?
Because if they crop i could add clickbait in the appropriate space

>>59667423

Whoever is doing this is triggering /g/ hard. 2/10
Hope you didn't go to college for this.

>>59670999
/thread

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>>59667116

>>59673406
nah, it doesn't feel apple-ish

I think >>59667120 is our best bet

>>59673431
great contribution, faggot

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>>59671003

>>59671473
кeк

>>59670999
"braced for impact" sounds better
and >>59671046

>>59671381
I take payment in keks

>>59671239
I know iPhones very well

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>all these fucking shitty attempts

Jesus fucking christ you retards. Just go to apple's website, find a suitable page, and edit the text in inspect mode.

>>59664291

Going the Distance

Improved battery life with the iPhone 7 and iOS 10

Apple fundimentally believes in our envionment and resorces

With iPhone you dont Burn the Coal and pay the Toll

>>59676125
We don't know how. ;_;

>>59673907
are you retarded
the font isn't even close to right and the text + image was made by the most downie tripfag I've seen

>>59677093
Well it's the best we got imho. Why don't you help us then, you seem to know your shit? He put the inkscape file in one of his posts up there.

>>59676828
LITERALLY right click and inspect in ff/crhome.

>thread up for almost 1 day
>a whole board can't fake 1 (one) simple advertising slide
>to trick the supposedly 'dumb' iPhone users

Ironing and pottery. Well done /g/.

>>59677344
>complaining like a 13 year old girl instead of helping
suck my cock dude

>>59666470
>>59677209
that one is by far the best in terms of layout and font, text itself could use some work

also I'm disgusting phoneposter atm

>>59677369

>helping

Do what? Say after 3 weeks this board makes something believable, then what? One of you posts it on their troll Facebook account and gets 3 likes? Then what?

>>59677437
it looks like a modified iphone 7 launch ad. We need to make it look as unique as possible otherwise it will all be over before it even begins.

>>59677498
We spread that shit through 9gag and let them take the heat of course.

>>59676828
JUST fuck my shit up senpai

>>59677529
perfect plan