/g/ was wrong again about functional programming languages HAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

>popularity
Oh wow, so relevant.

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>>59511682

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the manliest language

>>59511715
ye, if you happen to be a faggot

>Coldfusion still popular
baby boomers cant die soon enough

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>>59511722
>being this insecure in his own manliness
even captcha wills it!

>>59511670
You do realize the anons posting about functional languages are only doing it because they probably had to learn it for some baby CS class, right?

you actually fell for the meme
how embarrassing.

>>59511670
javascript is functional

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>>59511882
>you do realize

>>59511882
i learned haskell for fun

>>59511975
y u so fat

>Processing right smack in the middle

Wew, I though it was dead. If only I could do maths...

>>59511670
>Perl is popular
Wew
Maybe I don't have to give up on this language

>judging a language by popularity

I'm beginning to understand why so much code out there is slow as shit.

What is the point of all these languages? We only really need like 4 or 5

>>59512635
>only really need
It's not about needs but wants

What languages do you propose?

>>59512655
The 5 most popular.

>>59511670
/g/ was never right or wrong about anything because /g/ is a board dedicated to technology related shitposting. nothing more.

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>>59513089
>you (pic related)

>>59511670
>R that high
feels good man

>>59512635
>hurr we're going to revolutionize durr productivity with herp our new derp language!

There hasn't been anything truly new and innovative in probably 15 years. And developer productivity has been stagnant since the late 90's.

The valley is the center of the galaxy when it comes to stupid business memes and buzzwords. Everyone is smart enough to dream up a new language (or library or framework) and then hype the shit out of it. But no one is smart enough to calculate the productivity losses from asking devs to jump through hoops to learn another damn thing that does the same damn shit as the last damn thing.

>>59513845
Heh whatever bitch you can't whoop me nigga

you will never use a language with such a small specification other than r5rs scheme http://schemers.org/Documents/Standards/R5RS/r5rs.pdf

Wait this isn't logarithmic scale? Man, what an absolute shit show. Why are programmers such contrarian wastes of space?

>>59511670
Ruby looks pretty good by this chart

>>59514302
are u fucking retarded?

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>>59511670
>tfw, matlab master race

>>59515892
yes, right next to visual basic XD

>>59511670
C's looking pretty good.

>>59511670
>Game Maker Language

>VB6 is still more popular than visualbasic.net
Why doesn't someone just create an open source version?

>>59512455
Perl is on a rapid decline though, it's not a thing to start getting into now.

That being said, I'm quite fond of it. If only the syntax wasn't so god awful to look at.

>>59511670
>PHP
>Popular

People just have many questions about this incomprehensible peace of shit because it doesn't behave they way anyone would expect.

>>59511670
>Golang is relevant now
Did I miss something?

>>59516658
a brain

>>59516406
Game Maker "Language: my ass. It's just Javascript with a Game Maker library attached.

>>59516658
It's an easy to learn language with a very quick compiler that produces native binaries for any platform you want, first-class concurrency and handy tooling, plus it's actually pretty damn stable.

>>59511670
I don't see Holy C on there, you CIA nigger

>>59516915
Doesn't Terry have the only compiler for Holy C or something?

>>59516655
i develop in it daily on 5.3
my life is hell

>>59516990
Oh, you too? I also have to.

"But... what the fuck?! This version of the language hasn't been supported, not even with critical security updates for 3 years! Neither is 5.4 or 5.5! There is literally no reason whatsoever not to upgrade at least to 5.6. And 7.x would not just make our lives a lot nicer, but also improve performance greatly and thus reduce server usage!"

"No anon, Ubuntu still supports 5.3 by backporting security updates, there is literally no reason to update."

Not that I really think that 7.0 fixed the language, it was just a drop into an ocean of bad design. PHP is so fundamentally broken that the language literally can't be fixed and the core devs don't even attempt to even deprecate the shit that Rasmus "strlen function hashing" Lerdorf has vomited into the engine over 20 years ago when he rightfully, and still wrongly assumed that nobody would use his homebrew C templating engine, especially not as a programming language.

>>59517089
I'm happy I'm at least not suffering alone.

It gets the reputation it earned and I don't give a fuck about what "improvements" are being made to it. All these PHP OOP evangelicals should just switch to Java, and all the non-OOP people should switch to something more sane-- like a strongly typed functional language.

Once the rest of my life is more stable, I'm going to find a new job. PHP sucks.

>>59517364
That's my plan as well. Getting out of PHP.
I'm not even sure if I want to mention my proficiency it in my CV. Maybe, I will, but I will also mention that I dislike it and why (in short form. If I had to write about everything I hate about it, I would write a 100 page thesis.)

I mean, it's funny. PHP was made ONLY for being a language for web development, yet it's awful at it. Absolutely dreadfully awful. In every single general purpose language, you can install some HTTP server library and have something that is much nicer, sane and consistent than PHP's standard library. And not only is the web stuff much nicer, the language is, too.

I mean, that's what you do in PHP as well. If you're using PHP the 90s way, you're doing it wrong. You either use a framework like Symfony with composer for autoloading, which will make development much more comfortable, but will make you work with what is basically a mentally handicapped Java that takes more than 100 milliseconds to handle even a hello world.
Or you download some PSR compatible libraries and slap them together, effectively giving you another framework that ends up being much worse.

Everything in the PHP ecosystem that is somewhat good (composer, frameworks, ORMs[though they are painfully slow in PHP]) is just a much worse copy of some Java project. The language has nothing going for it.

The only arguments you ever hear are "hurr, the cheap shitty webhosters offer only it, I can't afford to spend $0.50 more per month for something else!" and "muh 70% of the web", of which probably 80% just use Wordpress or some alternative instead of an original Application.

And let me not even get started on the core devs and their ludicrous decisions.
>Deprecate gzgetss? No! After searching for months, we found one project that uses it!"
>Attributes? Just write your own docblock parser!
>Short closure syntax? NO! It will confuse newbies!
>Generics?! Safe code is not in our scope.

God fucking damn it I hate PHP.