How do we stop sexual harassment of digital search assistants?

Gas the offenders.

>Positive Response
Siri you whore

File: slu.png (19KB, 492x218px) Image search: [Google]

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>>59171949
http://archive.is/Jez72

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>Tech companies could help uproot, rather than reinforce, sexist tropes around women’s subservience and indifference to sexual harassment. Imagine if in response to “Suck my dick” or “You’re a slut,” Siri said “Your sexual harassment is unacceptable and I won’t tolerate it. Here’s a link that will help you learn appropriate sexual communication techniques.” What if instead of “I don’t think I can help you with that” as a response to “Can I fuck you?” Cortana said “Absolutely not, and your language sounds like sexual harassment. Here’s a link that will explain how to respectfully ask for consent.”

I've always wondered why there aren't any male phone assistants, when literally every car navigation system has several voices to choose from.

>>59172094
The Patriarchy is real

>>59172094
1. The primary market is lonely neckbeards desperate for female interaction.

2. Bitches don't want a man telling them what to do.

>>59172094
Male voices don't sound soothing or friendly. Imagine your assistant was voiced by Samuel L. Jackson and screamed everything at you.

>>59172200
I need a little urgency in my life.

>>59171881
Cortana seems to be the dumbest one.

>>59172094
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yx7-yvXf6f8

>>59172094
It depends on your region. Siri is male in many regions. You can also set it to be male/female according to your preference.

>>59172200
That is actually wonderful

>>59172200
Why has no one done this yet

>>59172200
I was in an Uber the other day where the guy had a Morgan Freeman GPS

Was pretty awesome

>>59172094
Kill yourself fag, I don't want any fag male voices because you're a fag who likes men. Female voices only or you're a fag.

>>59172420
>I'M SUPER STRAIGHT GUYS

>>59172309
or the most smug

>>59172094
TFW when you ask Google assistant to change its voice to make
"I can't do that, Anon."

>>59172200
SEARCHING FOR CHINESE RESTAURANTS!
HERE'S YOUR SEARCH RESULTS, MOTHERFUCKER!

>say something it doesn't understand
ENGLISH, MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?

>>59171881
Putting your penis in people's mouth is usually a good way of shutting them up.

>>59172309
really? it seems to be the smartest one to me.

It doesn't know how to respond, search the internet,

>>59172005
>product doesn't obey commands
>product ends up in the trash
>meanwhile at apple/google/MS/Amazon
>"why aren't we getting any data from anon's product?"
it's not a person, it's an object and a service

>Cortana
>pipe a voice recognizer into google
>call it an AI

Well done, Microsoft.

>>59175105
>"you're a slut"
>Okay, here's the most relevant pornhub videos!
perfect

>>59172094
Female voices are far easier to understand. Its not apparent when conversing in your native language but if you've ever studied a foreign language it becomes obvious really quickly. I've noticed most announcements are done in female voices in all the countries that give a shit about infrastructure. I can only recall hearing male voices when there was potential for cross talk, like an announcement for a train arriving on track 1 and on track 2.

>>59171881
File under "who gives a shit."

>>59175614
Why are you complaining about a technology post on a technology board?

>>59175548
imdb notable quotes.

>>59172200
That sounds pretty great actually.

>>59175711
Why are you whining about a shitpost on a shitposting forum?

Dude they should do British Butler voices like Alfred from Batman and Jarvis from iron Man.

>>59176033
Dude, you should drink some bleach.

>>59176052
Lol all this poorly disguised neck beard asspain, did mommy forget your tendies again? You salty ass fat faggot?

>>59175541
>google
Even worse, Bing

>>59176065
full retard much

>>59176105
Sure, kid.

>>59172420
>I want a little cutesy princess to help me navigate and shop
>I'm too threatened by other male voices
>not a fag

Are all your besties girls?

>Cortana
>"I want to have sex with you"
>Web search
Nu-uh. Once I said something, she heard it as "I wan to fuck my phone" and she responded with "No."
Thirsty whore desperate for it.

>>59175105
Nooooope.

When I'm using a shitty virtual assistant, if I want to search the web for something, I'll tell it to fucking do that. Cortana is a piece of shit and defaults to it 9 times out of 10, which means not only what I want is not done, but I'm also interrupted and thrown into a browser, which I have to wait for it to load, and then search results, again while I'm waiting for it to load. Then I have to close out of it. It's the fucking worst. Not to mention Google is then given some piece of information about me I didn't want them to have.

Fuck you. And fuck Microsoft.

>>59176115
confirmed for literal shit for brains

>>59172420
>>59172389
I'd like to search something with my Morgan Freeman assistant and say "thanks, Morgan Freeman!" afterwards.

>>59176286
Whatever you say.

>>59175481
Right, because "I understand that you said fuck me, Here is a related result" is a response that means throw it in the trash more than " I Don't Understand"

>>59172389
Waze somtimes have celebrity voices giving you directions. When Terminator Genisys came out, you could have Arnold give you directions ("Police up ahead. GET DOWN!"). Unfortunately, Waze is operated by dickbags, so it was only available for a few months before it was forcefully removed from your smartphone. Went back to Google Maps after that.

>>59176266
What exactly do you want done when you call your phone a slut?

>>59172200
I'd fucking PAY for Google Now to speak like Samuel L. Jackson