are you gonna buy one, /g/ ?

>>58730926
I'm gonna buy two

>>58730926
>Botnet cockring
No thanks

>>58731007
That's great, anon.

I heard the software support for iOS is really great!

>>58730926
Only if they integrate this into tinder

:^( Wish I could, but my cock is too big. That thing is for people that need the extra effort.

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69KB, 1920x1080px

>>58731060
Don't worry, they sell it to niggers as well.

File: fine_haha_yes.jpg (15KB, 417x408px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 417x408px

>>58730926
>Internet of Dicks
Bout time my dick got connected. Would buy one if they had gesture support for desktop, my slim jim would make a nice peripheral.

So where do you all get the information that it connects to the internet? Where can I buy this?

File: 1485492212946.jpg (347KB, 900x1200px) Image search: [Google]

347KB, 900x1200px

>>58731007
>>58731015
MACFAGS BTFO

>>58731092
Awesome! Now niggers can have the same cock ring you use to satisfy your imaginary girlfriend.

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267KB, 1280x720px

>>58730926
>>58731007
>>58731106
>>58731128

>ITT:
Bunch of fags add telemetry to their cocks.

>>58731259
My fetish is to have MS collect Basic Usage Data™ on my cock.

>>58730926
too small for me.

Too big for me.

>>58731251
Gotta swallow those red ones, one at a time. Stay vigilant friend.

Perfect size for me.

>>58731251
>typical troll attitude or scripted responce
>scripted responce

>is this a new desktop thread?

what does it do?

The only possible thing I can think of is tracking how long you maintain an erection, and your thrust rhythm.

Metronome app is really good for maintaining thrust rhythm, she likes that rather than "as fast as possible until I'm done".

>>58731732
>what does it do?
Gotta know this too.
I aint go searching for that thing to give the shills the clicks they are after.

>>58731732
>>58731818
It's vague but it at least tracks burned calories. It says it links to an app to recommend new positions. Sounds like it's useless and only tracks guessed calorie burns

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25KB, 767x198px

>>58731876
>it at least tracks burned calories.
So its just a motion sensor on your dick? How ist that better than just googling sex+calories and taking the first result and judging whether you have been active or passive? (pic related)

>It says it links to an app to recommend new positions
How does it do that? How does a dickmotion sensor know what position I am doing, and what other I could try?

I call bullshit?

>>58732001
>How does it do that? How does a dickmotion sensor know what position I am doing, and what other I could try?

While there is active research in this direction, but for fitness bracelets to determine if you're doing pull-ups/bench press/whatever (and the results are surprisingly good), I doubt some kickstarter hipsters went through this much trouble for their IoT cock ring.

I suspect this thing is just an accelerometer that gives you some input on how active you were and how long it lasted (like a sleep tracker) and it recommends other positions at random. The kamasutra has hundreds of unpractical positions, the odds of recommending one you already did is almost zero, maintaining the illusion of making an intelligent recommendation.

Or maybe they invested some effort and make a suggestion based on your previous performance: if you're slow and steady they'd pick a position that fits your style, or if you don't last long it may recommend a position that allows for a longer coitus.

>>58730926
no thanks I can build a superior one on my own that can actually measure how much cum I ejaculate, my average faps per minute, blood pressure and hardness without it asking me if i want to share my results with facebook

>>58732001
>How does a dickmotion sensor know what position
the same way a wiimote does.
a gyrosensor

>>58730926
Looks a bit narrow there.

>>58733171
It probably can figure out whether I am top or bottom, but I'd say the thrust-profile for say missionary and doggy are similar.

>>58730926
how do you know what size to get, that looks too small.

But I don't have a dick