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how fucked are you ?

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Thread replies: 66
Thread images: 24

File: police-raid.jpg (88KB, 419x275px) Image search: [Google]
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how fucked are you ?
>>
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>>58555579
I already hung myself.
>>
>be on /g/, using my Gentoo rig powered by QUADFIRE 7970s and an i7 2600k, when knock at cave door
>OPEN UP WE'S THE POH LEASE
>push a couple old Pentium 4s against the door (those things are just so damn handy)
>begin waddling towards escape hatch
>BANG BANG BANG
>cops shooting the door, screaming MURIKA FUCK YEAH
>be Canadian, quite confused
>continue waddling as fast as I can
>cops break door down
>they begin sprinting towards me
>one gets caught in my intranet
>fuck that was an expensive cable it's hard to get them that long
>whatever
>cop begins shooting me
>dive behind Fermi pile
>Fermis burst into flames, buying me time
>grab my Thinkpad
>escape hatch blocked by cans
>prepare for final stand
>cop comes around corner
>nail her on the head with my Thinkpad
>Thinkpad 1 SWAT helmet 0
>another cop rounds corner
>shoots me
>absorbed in my fat, bounces off
>this angers me
>release the bear
>Guardian Neckbear leaps from neck and begins biting cop
>throw GNU/Hurd kernel DVDs at him
>he dies from disgust
>cop jumps through can pile
>falls onto my pile of dragon dildos
>runs back out screaming
>jump in my get-away pedovan
>mom runs out of house
>SERGIO COMPUTER NO JUST WERKO
>NOT NOW MOM I'M BUSY
>rev up car
>cop cars begin coming around corner
>speed off
>they chase me
>they have no drivers and crash into poles
>an entire polish parade
>1.7% of the parade survive
>more cops behind me
>NO TIME FOR LOVE, COPPERS
>helicopter appears above me
>it's rotational velociodencity begins to degrade as it comes closer to my giant dog-shapped pedovan
>it bluescreen
>>
I have a trigger built into my PC activated by bluetooth. If I'm ever separated from my PC for more than five minutes, the trigger creates a spark which ignites a small amount of thermite, that burns through my SSDs.
>>
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>>58555587
>>
>bunch of copyright infringement

GG Cops. Your expensive operation really paid off.

Seriously though why would they give a fuck about you unless you fuck with govt/corporations i.e. computer crime
>>
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>>58555587
>>
>>58555632

I like knowing that somewhere there are cops so bad at math that they will investigate anything for years then keep investigating in hopes of somehow making the money back because otherwise they will end up fired for gross incompetence
>>
>>58555632
Ever heard of Kim dot com son?
>>
Team Obama fucked us all on the way out, basically flushing the 4th Amendment down the toilet.
What everyone with a brain figured would eventually happen, happened on January 3rd.
Everybody and their mother's uncle can now get access to raw NSA data.

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2017/jan/18/obama-authorized-destruction-of-liberty/
>>
>>58555579
Not fucked at all, I'm next door.
>>
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>>58555587

this nigga
>>
How fucked am I? I have a hardware raid 0
>>
>>58555587
Post it to r/4chan

>>58555555 what is this
>>
>>58555587
epic mane
>>
I'd be charged with a minor marijuana offense. If they looked through my files, they'd be disgusted, but there's nothing illegal.
>>
Not at all. Feels good.
>>
>had 6 hdd on hot swap
>have another pc to swap them into rigged to power the hdd to spin the disks
>drive metal pole doin the hdd
>shatter disks

Thats about it for me, gonna experiment using compressed air, turn it upside and see what it does to the disk when sprayed on.
>>
>>58556017
>mfw normal fag in this regard
>>
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>>58555579
If they want my roms that fucking bad, they can have them.
>>
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>>58555587
>>
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>>58555587
>>
>>58555579

I'd be embarrassed but I do nothing illegal really
>>
stole some cartoons
>>
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>>58555587
my fucking sides/10
>>
>>58555579
>not disclosing decryption keys 2-5 years in prison
>if I disclose my decryption keys probably a life sentence
2-5 year in prison is how fucked I am
>>
>>58555587
>SERGIO
>>
>>58555587
*holds up spork*
>>
dunno, depends on how hard they wanna jail me i could just get some wird look from the cops
worst thing I have is a bunch of pirated movies/series/cartoon/whatever
>implying i live in a country that gives half a fuck about copyright
gg
>>
>>58555587
>be Canadian, quite confused

Fucking lost it.
>>
>>58558775
be Canadian
>pic related
>>
>>58558835
Justin is the baitmaster supreme
>>
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>>58555587

fucking classic
>>
>>58555587
>guardian neckbear

lmao thanks anon
>>
>>58555617
[X] To Doubt
>>
>>58555579
im clean brah!
>>
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>>58555587
>>Guardian Neckbear leaps from neck and begins biting cop
>>throw GNU/Hurd kernel DVDs at him
>>he dies from disgust
I'm dying.
>>
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>>58555587

>release the bear
>>
>>58555632

Bitch please. A dude got the Polish equivalent of SWAT (they're called GROM here) all because he had a website ( http://antykomor.pl/ ) that was "disrespectful" of the president at the time.
>>
>>58555587
include me in the screenshot
>>
>>58555579
this very moment?
assuming I don't panic and manage to hit the hibernate button, not much
>>
>>58555579
By those guys ? Not very. They probably got the wrong address.
If they turn my collection of pirated media over to anti-piracy "authorities" and their respective lawyers though, I might well kill myself to get out of the debt.
>>
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>>58555587
>>
>>58555587
>when the memes got you trippin
>>
>>58555587
>he dies from disgust

gets me every time
>>
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>58555587
>absorbed in my fat, bounces off
>this angers me

>throw GNU/Hurd kernel DVDs at him
>he dies from disgust

>SERGIO COMPUTER NO JUST WERKO
>>
Good god...someone screenshot this.
>>
>>58562010
It's a pasta from way back, newfag. Everyone knows it and everyone posts it.
>>
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>>58555587
>OPEN UP WE'S THE POH LEASE
>>
>>58555617
Not an RFID posing as a fake button on your shirt. Are you even trying?
>>
>>58555587
>>cop comes around corner
>>nail her on the head with my Thinkpad
>>Thinkpad 1 SWAT helmet 0
fuckin' amazed.
>>
>>58555632
Government regularly raids people's houses for all sorts of shit.

Fuck, they use SWAT to serve warrants now. It could be a unpaid parking tickets and they'll still chainsaw your door.
>>
>>58555587
ITT
newfags who have never seen this pasta
>>
>>58555587
How come the first line is memetext but the rest of them are normaltext (whitetext)?
>>
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>>58555579
i have a qp of loud in my cabinet
>>
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>>58555632
in germany just for few bad facebook comments
>>
>>58555579
would try and commit suicide by cop when they came around to arresting me, and if that fails, suicide by any other method.
>>
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You will never get a hold of my rare Pepes.
>>
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>>58555587
its a pasta, but still kek'd
>>
>>58564244
Holy shit, it's true.

>>58564839
Do you mind if I download this one?
>>
>>58555579
i-it was only in the temp files so i'm good r-right
>>
>>58555579
Depends am I allowed to be sued for pirated material found in a police raid? If so I'm financially fucked for the rest of my life probably since that would make me an easy target to make an example out of. Otherwise I'm fine if they don't riddle me and my dog full of bullets for looking at them funny.
>>
>>58556320
>mfw someone posts mfw without an image
>>
>>58566699
>mfw when I have no face
>>
>>58555587
are the replies the guy who made this? this is fucking awful
>>
>>58555617
>bluetooth
what if they raid your room while you are across town
Thread posts: 66
Thread images: 24


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