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Help me out, fags. I decided I want to be a DBA. How do I become this?

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Thread replies: 12
Thread images: 3

File: database.jpg (48KB, 680x400px) Image search: [Google]
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Help me out, fags. I decided I want to be a DBA. How do I become this?
>>
That's database administrator. Come on guys, give me some advice
>>
File: 1455742123950.png (115KB, 375x467px) Image search: [Google]
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>>58146436
We know what the fuck a DBA is, we just don't care about you because you're too stupid to do a fucking google search
>>
>>58146556
Kill yourself
>>
File: mpv-shot0003.jpg (80KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]
mpv-shot0003.jpg
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>>58146567
You kill yourself faggot.
>>
Learn oracle, adabas, db2 or mssql if you want to make decent money
Learn mongo, postresql, mysql or redis if you don't
>>
>>58146353
Oracle cert
>>
Ah yes, starting a thread like you would on /b/ certainly will make everyone help you :^)
>>
>>58147522
That's correct
>>
>>58147522
>>58148118

Okay so I can't really afford a cert. Let's say I learn all this shit, how do I prove I know it?
>>
>>58148189
How can you not affort a cert? What's your current job?
>>
>>58146353
1. Learn about how a specific database works, and how to make it run optimally.
2. Develop a really surly and bitchy attitude
3. Be ignorant

Your job is to basically say 'no' to any project, regardless of the money or success it might bring your organisation. Nothing must stand in the way of your autistic control. Everyone will hate you for being a complete asshole.

Have fun!
Thread posts: 12
Thread images: 3


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