Are high tech dildos a meme?

ugh nigga, you gay.

Nah they good...I might be getting one of the rejects toh.

>>57454060
>sticking a Lithium battery in your ass
Do they make a USB C version?

>programming
lmao

>>57454060
>Buttons on the base
Always a mistake. Anything more than on/off requires a remote.

>>57454112
I don't think you're supposed to shove the whole thing in your ass.

>>57454060
>hacker USB port

HACK THE ANUS

>>57454144
yum install................ cummies x3

Needs an audio in. I want a subwoofer that I can shove in my ass.

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44KB, 634x357px

>>57454060
>Are high tech dildos a meme?

They are now.

what happens if the operating system segfaults?

>>57454235
Brown screen of Death

>>57454060
>no camera for a convenient colonoscopy
These dumb fucks don't know what high tech means.

Do vibrating dildos really increase pleasure when I jack it? I can't imagine sticking something in my butt feeling good

>>57454235
It would be very painful.

>>57454352
It's like nothing you've ever experienced anon.

Not for everybody, but prostate play is next level fucking.

>>57454480
you're a big guy

>>57454545
For whom?

>>57454352
im warning you anon, dont do it

you will go full butt gay if you do

>>57454590
Is that what happened to you?

>>57454701
y-yes

>>57454352
it really is that good
just stay away from sissy vids

>>57454704
I have no idea how the hell that happened, I tried for ages and didn't get anything out of it. I love it when stuff actually touches my butt though.

I think the cool thing about teledildonics or whatever is that it can make sexually interactive pornography a reality. At least for subs, if you want to do the fucking (you faggit) you can get a fake ass and VR and you're set for life.

One day we'll have interactive porn where anime fugs you, one day.

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>installing gentoo on your dildo

File: tesla charging tentacle.png (690KB, 920x613px) Image search: [Google]

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>>57454060
until it looks like this, and moves smoother, it's not a high tech dildo to me.

>>57455404
zozzle

Quick someone make more meams, this thread is great

I was thinking of designing at least the electrical parts of a smart dildo, mostly because it seems like the market is a bit lacking at the moment. Seems like you'd need a BT chip + assorted motors + cheap microcontroller, and that's kinda it. Anyone want to weigh in on this?

Fuck, I'd be building this thing already if my build quality weren't so shitty.

As long as you can control it with emacs, why not?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1sXuHnf_lo

>>57454060
yes, fucbois and ladies will use anything with a slight ressamblance of a shaft to fuck themselves to death. Those cute holes don't care about techonlogy.

>>57455414
Holy shit. When's it coming out?

>>57454060
Donald trump is a meme and he got elected.

I'm sure a crossdressing programmer is working on this right now.

>>57456356
>Making an IoT dildo that can collect what settings are used at what time in a use case scenario to tweak the experience.

>>57454182
https://soundcloud.com/kony1015/approximately-what-salil-sawarim-would-sound-like-if-you-were-inside-an-ass

>>57456382
It begins!

Fuck, then you could program it to tease and edge you.

>>57456382
>Your VR waifu says it's time to play ~
>Magic wand on chastity cage starts vibrating
>But now you've got to learn to take it life a girl ~
>dildo starts vibrating
>Wand brings you to the edge and turns off
>Cum from dildo

>Keeps happening until you only cum from dildo.

>>57456382
>Can collect
Even fucking dildos will become part of the botnet

Beware the potential security and privacy issues of the Internet of Dongs.

No, I'm dead serious, that's actually what we're calling it: http://internetofdon.gs/

I don't want to live in the crazy cyberpunk dystopia where people's shit gets crashed by a rampaging army of cyber buttplugs.

Also consider that this is THE most personal, intimate data you could possibly have: you're one authentication exploit away from sexual assault and one privacy snafu away from blackmail.

>>57456541
Your ideas are intriguing to me. I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter.

>>57456806
>be sysadmin
>big ddos
>it's from dildo's

The second life dildo ddos just entered the real world.

>>57456996
There isn't one I'm afraid. For awhile I must mucking around with text to speech and the set up was that an android was telling you how to stretch yourself so you were ready for when your mistress wanted you.

That's just a similar idea based on stuff I found on the Bound Anna forums. They found a way to hook up magic wands to computers. So I just figured the first thing you could do is have a VR mistress who does slightly distant things to you.

I've also been wondering whether you could simulate blowing a futa using honey select and a dildo. There's actually a program on BA that forces you to deep throat a dildo to get a key to release handcuffs. So at first I figured you could use it with a blind fold and a text to speech, but I think you can take it all the way with VR.

The real hardcore thing to do is build a fucking machine and use that with text to speech and VR.

>>57457182
Oh and apparently Text-to-Speech is basically going to be perfect in a few years. So say goodbye to your local prostitute or whatever.

>>57454485
>>57454352


just dont even fap to blowjobs, traps, youll end up imagining those dicks in your butt, better to fap to lesbian, solo,

or even metart tier photoshoped softcore images, anal stimulation makes it ultra enjoyable again like when you were 14yo

try puting a banan in a condom

sound advices below
>>57454485 >>57454590 >>57454732

>>57457028
fuck I laughed

>>57457028
>Dildo Denial of Service attacks

>>57454590
shit, you should see how I ended up after mixing it with choking myself. now no normal woman can even get me hard

>>57454060
>still no hi-tech dildo that can push jelly eggs into your cunt
Fuck this wait

>>57459178
>your cunt
you mean your rear cunt or..?

>>57459182
It's hard to shit eggs out. It's a lot easier to tug them out of your cunt, or let gravity do the job for you

>>57454060
>usb charging and programming
i would make a giant 20+ teraflop dildo supercluster