Fucked Up Adventure

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So this all began last night when I went to install my new SSD. Mounted and formatted the thing with an adapter to see if it wasn't DOA, worked fine. So I open the laptop up, put the drive into the bay, close it and fire it up. Boots up, but then it starts doing that checkerboard screen glitch, the one that generally means "Something with memory is fucked up". Kill the power and get out the pile o' Thinkpads and start swapping pieces out of my machine into them to see what's fucked up. RAM is fine, drive is fine, but when I put everything back in, it doesn't even get to BIOS before it shuts off. Now Im quite worried. Turn it on a few more times and it says somethings fucked, and I gotta reinstall windows. No big deal, let it do that for a while.

Then this morning it goes to shit again. Gets stuck on the windows logo and spinning dots for hours. A few minutes in it goes weirdly pixelated. The bastard refused to even boot from a Linux USB for some fucking reason. Then a few minutes ago it suddenly comes back to life, says its finishing installing an update and seems to be normal.

What the fuck caused this?