Why do companies do cheesy shit like this at conferences?

Women.

Cake.

>>54879896
People like cake, do you not?

>>54880210
But why make it of your company's dumb logo?

>>54880261
Because what else would you put on a huge-ass cake? Other than a huge ass.

Why did they not order a laptop cake or something?

Missed opportunities.

>>54880170
FPBP

>>54880310
Logs for the compilation of the Linux kernel

PASS THE CAKE ALONG MELVIN YOU FUCKING BASEMENT DWELLING NOT-EVEN-WORKING-AT-THIS-COMPANY GERBIL STAPLER FETISH HAVING MUMMY'S BOY FUCK
I feel bad for melvin

lack of imagination and creativity, brought on in part by corporate groupthink and soulless committee-based planning process

>>54879896
Corporate sing-alongs used to be a thing, so be grateful that middle-management corporate culture is slowly fading into irrelevance.

>>54880891
>Corporate sing-alongs used to be a thing

I guess you haven't seen this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5LiUrezV6k

>>54880920
Nobody was singing tho.
This is basically misguided stockholder trash just like that qualcomm ces keynote.

>>54880891
>be grateful that middle-management corporate culture is slowly fading
Yeah, that's not a good thing. Ping pong tables and egg lounge chairs and slides are causing brain cancer.

>>54880310
You could make a cake the shape of your company's product, like a server, a storage array, or ethernet switch.

>>54880310
Funny
>>54880362
Also funny.