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Butt health/fitness

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Thread replies: 153
Thread images: 29

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>meet chick at school
>date for 2 weeks so far
>we give in to urges.... its time to do the diddly
>she's mackin on these lips, laying on me naked
>hands running up and down her body
>move hand closer to her waist
>feelin the moisture
>doin the diddly now
>switch positions
>doggy
>getting into that there rhythm
>all of a sudden

>>smell of feces
>>not sure if it's her or me
>she's saying typical bullshit I want to hear
>"you're the perfect size omg"
>>how many dicks have provided you with an appropriate range of size/pleasure for you to form an opinion without bias bitch?
>I don't say anything back cuz confused about source of smell
>>she's fake moaning
>>assume it's a cue to hurry the fuck up cuz she prolly smelling it too
>finish
>sitting on bed
>she walks by
>it's definitely her
>how does she not realize this??
>smell is musky as funk

What do?
>>
Also pic semi related
>>
>>42867873
i hate that shit. i cant get the smell out of my mind when i see some girls i used to fuck. some people dont wipe properly nor do they wash themselves properly even if they know they are gonna present that anus a few hours later.
>>
>>42867922
for the few times ive had sex its the worst - turns it from hot fuggin into a marathon race where i just want to fucking finish and have a shower.
>>
don't date ugly chicks who have bad hygiene
>>
>>42867941
its not only ugly chicks. some people are just fucking awful.

>>42867932
yeah awful - if you wanna stay with her, you gotta tell her. if you wanna just bang for a few more weeks, just fuck in the shower or initiate whenever she left the shower or didnt shit yet - thats what i did.
>>
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>>42867941
Nigga she was hot
5'9", 110 pounds, lifts weights (everyday is leg day).
Pic related
>>
>>42867873
>2017
>americans STILL refuse to use a bidet
Truly disgusting.
>>
>>42867873
well yep that sums up my worst sex ever
>night out with friends
>cute chick that I don't know
>kiss at the bar
>get back to her place
>getting hot in the uber
>arrive to her place, undress
>she goes down on me
>shit she's good
>get ready to go down on her
>get_ready_for_flavortown.jpg
>she probably has never shaved
>her pussy is fucking smelly
>I'm not putting my tongue in this
>get back up and start kissing her
>awkward
>sex is bland
>fake cumming and go throw empty condom in the bathroom
>back in the bedroom
>fucking smell hits me
>ohmygodwhydoIhavetodothis
>leave in the morning
>never text her again, neither does she
worst thing is that she probably told her friends "yeah that guy sucks in bed", while it was definitely her fault. I'm getting angry just typing this again.
>>
>>42867873
>tfw gfs ass smells bad even after shower

WTF is wrong with women?
I don't have the guts to confront her yet
>>
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>>42868030
>welcome to flavor town

I've had trips to funky town, but the rare occurrence of reaching flavor town.... my boy..... I go tonsil deep muh nigga

Worst oral story of mine is:
>meet 6/10 Asian chick at work
>sexual tension for months
>start hanging out
>we both horny af
>she goes down on me
>then whips her legs over my head
>we doin the 69
>tastes sweet, it's subtle, but I'm enjoying it
>feel bits of food in my mouth
>wtf
>I'm spittin out stuff on the sly, things I'm assuming are from the dinner we just ate
>more shit accumulates in mouth
>what the fuck
>she's on top so I'm kind of stuck
>I cum, she just sits on my face like I enjoy eating pussy when I'm not horny, not realizing my interest in this ass on my face is fading exponentially
>she eventually gets off after grinding on my jaw for 5-10 more minutes while my entire face is numb from getting my work in, tongue and jaw game on point
>turn on lights
>bits of fucking tampon everywhere
>I've been chewing on fucking disintegrated tampon particles for almost 40 minutes
>>
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>>42868084
Mfw
>>
girls = doo doo
if you're ever with a girl and not smellin hella doo doo, it's because she's successfully masked it with perfume. but you're still licking straight doo doo off her body.
>>
>>42868017
even third world countries have better anal hygiene then western countries
>>
>>42868078
she probably never cleans it because she thinks it's gross to touch her anus. might have to find a new gf
>>
>>42868010

>arm fat

2/10 would not bang
>>
>>42868084
sorry bro, women on their periods instinctively try to seduce and dominate beta providers
>>
>>42868084

I just vomited in my mouth.
>>
>>42867873

Not sure why, but my girl has never smelt of feces. Its one of the good parts of her. I am also convinced its due to her personal hygiene and diet.
>>
>>42868017

not just using baby wipes.

gtfo with that inconvenient expensive shit
>>
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Brehs.... I know this feel all too well

>be reserved, quiet dude in the neighborhood
>finished with school, did all the required training to make myself more marketable, but unable to get a job so stuck at home
>not a lot of luck meeting women cuz loner
>go outside one day, see chick just going for a jog
>I decide fuck it.... I'll start jogging the same time and maybe we will make conversation one day

Fast forward

>eventually get on friendly terms
>she the type of girl that spends hours making sure her hairs just right
>I'm not sure I'm her type but I don't care anymore, I can be Dana's friend
>one day while we are sitting around lazily, getting some sun in the backyard
>she doesn't even say anything but decides to move her face down to my crotch
>she wraps her tongue around it.... feels good man
>next thing I know I'm hitting it doggy
>smell of ass is funky as shit but I don't really care
>going deep, she tries to step forward a bit
>naw fuck that ima bust this but
>hittin cervix
>I feel it
>going so hard she starts puking
>she starts eating her puke while we are fucking
>WTF
>she's telling me to go "Rough!"
>I'm confused
>neighbor sees us
>runs over all fucking pissed
>BAD BOY ! BAD BOY
>fuck off man I'm busy
>dad comes over and peels me off
>some shit about Dana being pure bred and in heat
>I'm just some mut
>never see Dana again
>owner doesn't let me outside anymore
Pic related
>>
>>42868160
>inconvenient, expensive
H O W
O
W
Do you usually wash your other body parts with baby wipes?
>>
>>42868084
dude I almost just threw up my oats
>>
>>42868169
shut ur butt
>>
>>42868174
At least my butt doesnt smell of literal shit
>>
>>42868178
aww sweetie, do you have the perfumed bottom of a dainty little princess?
>>
>>42868169

compared to baby wipes it is
>>
Makes me want to subtly force the girl into taking a shower before having sex. I'll make her think it's just part of the experience, be like
>oohh yea baby let me rub this lufa on your pussy, you like that shit
>you like passion dragonfruit body wash or mango peach?
>Yea let me scrub your body in this shit
>let me turn that chocolate starfish pink for you
>You like it how I dry you off baby?
>Hell yea lets have sex now
>>
>>42868167
i like this
>>
>>42868010
Pff show her face I'll be the judge of that. I bet she's no higher than a 5
>>
>>42868204
How? installing a bidet is like, 150$? And then you are done with the costs (0.1 cents of water a month or so? kek). It's really not more than baby wipes, and you never have to buy that shit ever again.
>>
>>42868160
You don't need a bidet, just get in the shower.
>>
>>42868084
Holy shit, I cant stop laughing.
>>
>>42868239
>showering evry single day
>"got my hand dirty cooking, better shower instead of using a specific bathroom appliance"
>>
What if you slip a few altioids under your tongue and when you do the doggy, you place the altoid over the butthole
>>
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>>42868084
>>
>>42868266
>instead of using a specific bathroom appliance
My argument was obviously made with the point being that you don't have a bidet. Buying and installing a bidet is easier and cheaper than jumping in the shower? Are you being intentionally difficult?
Besides who said you need to take an entire shower? Just wash your ass and get out, it doesn't even take two minutes.
>>
>>42868294
I sell bidets for a living
>>
this happened to me one time, went to do doggy on this chubby bitch but as soon as i got behind her i smelt that reeking smell of feces and i lost my boner. she ended up sucking me off when i had a semi and i still came in her mouth but man that was gross

now i got the perfect gf, pussy tastes good every time, she washes it with soap, even lets me fuck her in the ass every now and then and she doesn't even mind it.
>>
>>42868160
>>42868017
dude baby wipes, soap and bidet masterrace reporting in. nice to know that you got the cleanest arse in the country.
>>
My gf and I always take a shower beforehand. There's never any bad smells and her pussy always has a neutral taste
>>
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>>42868304
>>42868294
24k gold plated deluxe bidet with 4 pressure settings reporting in

Fuck outta here with ya pleb shit you scrubs
>>
>>42868318
That's just overkill, i bet you dont even wash your hands as much
>>
Is there a polite way to tell a bird to scrub her arse more
>>
>>42868327
>no wi-fi controlled colon bio-analyzer
It's like you want to be dirty
>>
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>>42868084
b o i
>>
>>42868331
nope. wash hands all the time.
>>
Don't Americans have those little shower heads next to the sink in their bathrooms? Just blast your ass with those desu.
>>
>>42868334
Politeness went out the door when she wafted her shit smell in your face. Tell her to wash her dirty ass.
>>
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Mfw I hit it from the back....
And I see the asshole start winkin,
Then the room start stinkin....
>>
>>42868010
>110lbs
>5'9
pick one mate, if she's both of those then she's a skeletor
>>
>>42868167
made me lol
>>
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Virgin here.

So girls butts DO smell? This is troubling.
>>
>>42868010
>dat pic
>5'9", 110 pounds
hah
>>
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>>42868327
>24k gold plated deluxe bidet with 4 pressure settings reporting in
>>
>>42870375
yes, so does yours
>>
>>42868010
She looks very very similar to a girl I know, I'm almost 90% sure it's her, the leg day comment really convinced me that it was her, your a fucking shit head, your fucking disgusting.
>>
>>42870545
>getting bits of poo splashed everywhere.
>>
I love my gym. I really do. But I've had it up to HERE with these monthly butthole inspections.

I put a lot of thought into my workout program. I've made it, easily. There's no reason I should have to endure the humiliation of going before the gym owner and his trainers, dropping my squat plug, bending over, and spreading wide for a full anal analysis.

According to the chart, my b-hole is a "Cheerio" type, the smallest allowable size in our gym. I get bitched at for this every time, but I honestly don't know how to fix it? Gym Lord himself claims to have a "Fruit Loop" which is the "statistically perfect fitness anus."

This system never really bothered me until last week, when I saw a really ripped friendly Chad banished from our gym for sporting a "bagel" anus, which is three sizes too big. (Our gym only goes from "Cheerio" to "mini-doughnut," although exceptions can be made based on the shape of the hole and level of pinkness).

It's also unfair how the guys with the best assholes get first pick of squat racks as well as free premium plugs. I contribute more to our gym than anyone in Gym Lord's inner circle, but get rejected from their clique because I was born with a "less impressive" anus. By the way, I have seen the holes of every guy in the top 10, and they're hardly majestic.

On top of this, there's the obvious problem of not being able to eat the morning of my routine or the night before, for fear of accidentally passing gas during the inspection. That's a worse crime than excessive hair, or even failing to thoroughly wipe yourself. The one and only guy I've ever seen play the butt trumpet during his inspection was blacklisted from every gym in the state. I'm not going to lie though, if I ever wanted to quit working out, I'd do so by deliberately ripping a toot right in the head inspector's smug face.

Sorry for the rant. I just feel like the normalization of anal inspections has cheapened my once-noble, fit hobby. But I understand if you disagree.
>>
>>42868010
>Pic related
There is no way in he'll the girl in your pic is 110 lbs unless she's 5 feet tall lol. You're obviously delusional
>>
>>42870616
but y would he lie though? short girls are hotter........
>>
>>42868084
Tampons don't break apart like that unless it's been up there for like a month. It's might have been chunks of vaginal yeast infection, it turns the vaginal lining from clear and next to tasteless/odorless to a thick white smelly chunks. That's more likely what you were molesting with your tonsils
>>
>>42868224
Nah man, you can get an entry-level bidet for under $50 and install it yourself. Idk where this idea that bidets are expensive luxuries came from, they're pretty cheap if you don't need features like oscillating nozzles and heated water. Plus they save you money on toilet paper.
>>
>>42868017

This. I traveled in India for a while of all places, and even they have bidets. You c a order them on amazon for under 30 bucks, btw, and they're very easy to install.
>>
>>42867873
>tfw from third world country and still have better anal hygiene
use some water faggots
>>
>>42868084
hey at least you didn't eat shit like i first thought you did
>>
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>>42868084
Someone screencap this shit
>>
>>42868167
Kek, have a (you)
>>
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>>42871221
put me in the screencap mang
>>
>>42868323
You washing away the testosterones bro. You should shower (clean pits and ass cracks), wait a couple hours or so until you gain your natural musk and then hit that shit.
> girl will associate your natural smell with sexual pleasure
>>
>>42868331
Your hands don't have shit come out of them
>>42868160
Bidets as cheap as $25 are available that just sit under your toilet rim and attach directly to your water supply line
>>
>>42867873
>"you're the perfect size omg"
virgin detected. no woman would say that while having sex. it's fucking weird.
>>
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>>42868167
holy fuck that caught me way of guard
>>
>>42868376
Bidets, and no we do not.
>>
>>42868084
>>
>>42868084
I honestly thought you were gonna talk about the trip to flavor town. Not this shit lmfao
>>
>>42870600
>TL;dr
>>
I love abit of musky ass. Although it can be a fine line between musk and shit, heaven or hell.
>>
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>>42868084
C H I N K E D
>the Asian in charge of hygiene
>>
>>42868017
Honestly considering having one installed in my bathroom.
>>
>>42871438
virgin detected

my girl says stupid shit like this all the time

"we were made for each other"
"your dick is perfect for me"
>>
>>42868167
subtle kek
>>
>>42870708
wtf is entry level bidet
>>
Lmao white people problems, just fucking get a toilet shower like a civilised arab god damn.
>>
>>42868109
Hello rebbit
>>
>>42868084
Haven't laughed out loud to something in months but you got me
>>
>>42875705
It only sprays water at your asshole. The more advanced models have features like adjustable nozzles, automatic moving nozzles, a built-in heater, and enema attachments (yes it's a real thing).
>>
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>>42867873
>>42868030
>>42868084

>be last week
>go over to a coworker's place, who lives with a few other people including good looking, short-haired hippie girl
>we all drink a bunch of whiskey, I start flirting with her
>all go out to a bar, flirt more there
>at some point we're all talking about hair and she drops the whole "we need to challenge body hair beauty standards" meme
>ohgodoneofthesegirls.jpg
>figure it's no big deal, seems like she'd keep it in shapley and ordered and pubes have never been a deal breaker for me
>uber her and myself back to my apt
>she runs to the bathroom, I put on some music
>she comes back and we immediately start making out, shit is hot
>get her shirt off, very nice bobs
>get on top of her on the bed
>put my hand down her pants to rub her clit a bit
>hand suddenly gets lost in a Cambodian jungle
>was not expecting this amount of bush, forgot my machete
>Eventually able to John Rambo my middle finger to the sweet spot
>she starts moaning, I'm a little put off by the amount of pubic hair but keep going for it
>she starts moaning louder
>stops me so we can get nekket
>eventually get back on top of her fingering her again
>pinky goes AWOL to recon her bumhole and, i'll be damned, full layer of bush trailed down to and ringed around her rosie
>bring it back up and she stops me, pulls my head into her and whispers "go down on me"
>oh boy, here we go

(cont…)
>>
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>>42877446
(cont.)
>get on the ground on the side of the bed
>close my eyes so i'm not turned to stone and pull her by her legs to my face so her crotch is right in front of me
>her bush smells TERRIBLE
>smells like urine, gooch sweat and rusty coins and tastes like it too
>no turning back now
>spread the lips and plunge my tongue through the depths of her rainforest, eventually able to engage Charlie
>pubic hair literally going up my nostrils at this point
>disgusted but keep pressing on
>give her a good few minutes of the ol' lickaroo
>vaginal fluids flood the bush like a monsoon rain
>holding my breath so as not to aspirate on the rancid jungle juice
>not too long later I've had enough, get on top of her and start fucking her
>pussy feels nice, shit is cash even though I've got the taste of her willful bodily negligence in my mouth still
>start going faster
>dick kind of starts to get sore for some reason
>without warning she stops me and flips me over, gets on top
>starts going down on me
>feelsgoodman
>after a few minutes she draws herself back up and whispers "go down on me" again
>Glad the lights were off so she didn't see mfw
>In the throes of everything, decide to just do it
>get off the bed in the same position as before
>First blood pt. 2
>this time everything is soaked in stank from the get go, still have pubic hair flossing itself between my teeth from the last time
>Go balls to the wall and eat the shit out of her stinky pussy while holding my breath
>pubes feel like a wet mop on my face
>she moans louder and louder
>I've fucking had enough, flip her over and doggystyle her till Alpha company has landed
>get off of her and immediately turn on a lamp to go to the bathroom
(cont…)
>>
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>>42877451
(cont.)
>bedside light comes on
>HOLY FUCK I'm covered in blood
>she's still face down on my bed and she, my sheets and pillows are covered in blood, looks like a fucking murder scene
>turn the lights back off and go back to the bathroom, look in the mirror and my face looks like I actually consumed the bitch
>immediately jump in the shower and start cleansing myself
>she decides to come in and join me in the shower(which really only has room for 1 person), covered in blood, acting like nothing happened
>"I...didn't know you were on your period" I said, as the menstruation flowed down my legs into the rose'-colored drain puddle
>"Oh, yeah. I took out my Divacup when we got here"
>scowl on the inside
>get cleaned up and change my sheets
>she decides to fucking stay the night
>gone by the time I wake up, left a note saying lets do it again
>no fucking way in hell
>realize the burning sensation on my pecker was rug burn from the bush on the sides of her cooter, both sides of penis are rubbed raw
>have the smell of her pussy on my dick, hands and beard still
>take another shower to no avail
>smell lingers for the next couple of days

I think now, looking back, I do not shame the hippie girl, I shame myself. The shame was in me. The war is over for me now, but it will always be there, the rest of my days. As I'm sure the bush will be, fighting with my nose for what 4chan called "possesion of my soul." There are times since, I've felt like a child, born of those two fathers. But be that as it may, those of us who do survive the bush stink have an obligation to build again. To teach to others what we know, and to try with what's left of our lives to find a goodness and a meaning to this life.
>>
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>>42868084
I'll take things that never happened for $1000.

Do you really believe a tampon would "disintegrate" during oral? Do you really think a thot you barely know would let you eat her out with her plug still in?
5/10 for fooling all the other virgins.
>>
>>42877516

No one cares if you believe it
It mentions sexual tension for months,
Coworker- not barely known or just met

Also you've never dealt with a torn tampon, the absorbent material inside comes out like tiny cotton particles
>>
>Meet a girl off tinder
>5/10 least shes not fat
>Get to banging and all I can smell is Papa John's Garlic Sauce
>Trying to figure out what it is, was at her apartment so i'm thinking she must have a tub of it open somewhere
>Switch positions, shes riding me now
>Smell is stronger now, the chick is sweating like a fucking pig (no AC in her apartment)
>Holding her waist as she rides me, hands are dripping wet with her sweat
>Go to slick back my own hair and get a huge hit of the Garlic Sauce smell
>Smell my hands, they stink of it
>Her fucking sweat smells like the Garlic Sauce

First and only time I had lost an erection during sex. Between her insane sweating and the stick I couldn't do it anymore.
>>
>>42870675
Or dry skin from her vagoo.
>>
>>42868167
>she's telling me to go "Rough!"
JEJ
>>
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>>42868084
>
>>
>hook up with my ex with the intentions of hate fuck
>think it's going to be hot and intense
>he comes over and we watch a movie /talk
>eventually start making out and taking off clothes
>love getting eaten out and of course take very good take of myself so that was not the issue
>always shower, have summers eve, use a bidet
>ask ex to go down on me cuz that's my favorite thing in the world ^_^
>looks at me, hesitates, and then goes "ok fine but only for a couple of mins"
>I look at him and go "uhh how about no"
>slowly start to put my clothes back on and pretend like it's nbd
>he gets all defensive and goes "nononono. I love going down on u but I just don't know who else you've been with"
>don't care
>kick him out as he pleads when me begging me to forgive him
>angrily goes "u know it's - bro code - that guys don't like going down on girls"
>not even going to reply to this moron
>he's an x for a reason. gtfo and have a nice day
>basically kicked a dude out because he didn't want to eat me out lols
>>
>>42878609
Me again. Teeeheee.

>meet dude off okc
>lose my v card to him
>he's got some good traits and some Meh traits
>good : 6 foot, white, and decent body
>bad : ugly stained teeth, ginger, likes to strictly go Dutch
>alright.jpg
>one day we're fucking and he asks me to go down on him
>it stinks like whatever stinky circumcised dick smells like
>like expired feta cheese
>look at him and go "Ew it drinks"
>goes to the bathroom and washes off his dick in the sink
>>
>>42878650
Fuck. Dumb typos make me angry.
Stinks*

My stories are not that amusing. I have pretty normie sex and I'm very reserved so I don't just fuck anyone. This eliminates a lot of potentially dirty people. I just wanted to contribute so there'd be diversity.
>>
>>42870556

He was memeing you man
>>
>>42870375
i've eaten plenty of asses, yet to encounter a nasty one. but i only fuck hot girls so my experience is clearly different from this thread
>>
>>42867873
ive thankfully not experienced this yet

>inb4 virgin
>>
>>42878483
Was she Greek? Or Middle Eastern?

Ive travelled abroad a shit ton, and of all the ethnic women I've dated, the Greek and Iranian women have had this earthy smell.

This Greek Girl had a faint olive oil smell (not stereotyping ether). But many women there actually use olive oil as a skin moisturizer every few days, and some mix it with shampoo

The Iranian chick smelled like girl sweat, like the smell of your gf after a light jog. It wasn't bad, it was actually kind of sexy, but other times it became stronger and overbearing. Her sister had this smell too.

Been to Russia a few times too, Moscow, St Petersburg up north, and their women didn't smell like anything. Their houses had their own distinct smells of course, but the chicks I saw didn't have an odor, or if they did it was so subtle I didn't notice.
Didn't smell perfume, fruity smells of shampoo or conditioner, nada
>>
>>42878830
No way was she greek or middle eastern, she was pasty white with naturally blond hair. Had a eurocentric name too. Still never experienced anything like it, she had to have some sort of disorder to sweat this much not to mention the smell coming off her. Didn't smell rancid or even anything like BO, she just smelled like that fucking garlic sauce
>>
>>42878855

Try dipping some breadsticks in the sweat beads on her forehead, and report back on how it tastes bro
>>
>>42878905
Blocked her on Snap and unmatched her as soon as I got to my car. Shit was embarrassing.
>>
>>42878936

Was the pussy juicy at least?
Like dunking that first breadstick in a freshly opened cup of garlic sauce? Where the juices overflow the brim?
>>
>>42878951
She was the wettest chick I ever fucked for sure, she told me she soaked through her jeans at dinner just talking to me and I thought she was talking shit till I looked under the table to see a huge wet spot in her crotch. She did the jacket around the waist thing to hide it. I thought it might have been piss but it was way to slippery to be piss
>>
>>42878966

Sounds hot.
I'd compromise and take juicy over garlic smell any day.

I like the girls with the slimy juice, feels best. The kind that comes out a little thicker than water and runs down your dick and balls up into your butt crack if she's ridin.

But if I had a 10/10 super model chick that smelled like the Japanese Rose Gardens, but the juice was thinner, best believe I'm gonna bury this in dipping sauce girl over model
>>
>>42878992
The fuck was good, she was riding me like a champ but fuck as soon as I made the connection between her sweat and the garlic sauce my boner died.
>>
>>42879006
Shieeet man, I don't know how y'all do it.
Nothing deters me from finishing.
Like something tragic would need to happen for me not to finish pitchin the long dick.

I'm talking like active terrorist attack, like breaking into my house, if it's explosions that I'm hearing on the street, in most likely gonna pretend I don't hear it and keep going.

Even if the girl suffers some tragic life threatening event, like she has some heart condition and her lips start going blue and she's not breathing anymore, I think I'd still finish and then call police.
>>
>>42878936
Papa John's garlic sauce is amazing, don't see what the problem was here??
>>
>>42879025
You are implying I made a choice, soon as I put the smell to her sweat my dick turned off. I wanted to cum bad, she was on the ring so it was safe to nut in her and everything


>>42879029
I think if I got a second chance at her I could deal but it was the shock of it that sent me for the loop
>>
>>42879034
Fuck that's worse!
My dick does this with fat chicks, but I forget how I found a way to finish.

I think they lay flat and I do standard mish position. Haven't fucked 1 fat girl that knew how to ride a dick nor had the stamina, they all had to just lay on their backs and spread.
>>
>>42879061
I went so limp the chick even said "Whats wrong". I just told her I was cheating on my wife and felt bad about it. Didn't want to tell her the smell coming off her made me want to dip bread sticks in her cooter
>>
>>42879169
Fucking Kek

You could make a creative copy pasta like the cheeto "dangerously cheesy" one with breadsticks.
>riding my breadstick
>she thinks it's my dick
>it gets soggy so she thinks I'm soft
>"are you okay?"
>can't speak cuz mouth too full of previous breadstick dipped while doing doggy
>she looks over
>"w-what are you eating?"
>garlic sauce drips from mouth
>she jumps off
>soggy breadstick stays in vagina
>"w-what is this?"
>tries to dig out what's in her vagoo
>"is this fucking Papa johns breadsticks?"
>"y-you're fucking papa johns breadsticks muh lady," *tips papa johns delivery driver hat
>"b-better ingredients.... b-bett..."


Options are limitless
>>
this thread makes me glad I'm a virgin
>>
>>42878707
Define eating ass pls
>>
>>42868167
>she's telling me to go "Rough!"
beautiful
the pic related gave it away way too soon though
>>
>>42873757
trust me that bidet will save your life butt cancer is real
>>
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>>42877446
>>42877451
>>42877465
>Mfw reading this post
>Women are the fairer sex
>Women are clean and hygienic
>Women smell so nice
Don't believe this shit for a moment
>>
>>42870600
looool i really hope this is pasta
>>
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>>42879365
dont let this thread put you off there plenty of girls that clean their butts nice and good just have to tell beforehand whether clean
>>
>>42879770
God that girl reminds me so much of my ex.

>Red hair
>Brown eyes
>Thick but neat eyebrows
>Bulb tip nose

I have a perpetual thing for redheads with brown eyes because of her. She was a whore though. Feels bad.
>>
>>42878665
> It's another "anon LARPs as a chick" episode
>>
>>42875630
suuuuuure buddy
>>
>>42868084
i might just stay virgin bruh

But seriously never go down on a woman,use fingers then just fuck her.
>>
>>42879963
2nd opinion here.

Chicks say whatever they think you want to hear while fucking.
>>
>>42879770
Is that Daniel Motherfuckin Radcliffe in the background ?
>>
>>42868167
Lel
>>
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>>42868084
No bueno
>>
>>42868167
Top quality
>>
>>42868212
I needed a good laugh this morning. Thank you kindly, bro.
>>
>>42877446
>>42877451
>>42877465

bullshit how did you not taste the blood faggot
>>
>>42880756
its clarence
>>
tfw kissless virging 25 yo and im worrying about my performance if it ever comes to it some day, but i read this thread and afraid ill get disgusted if some chick has bad hygiene, how often does that happen ?


I wash my dick and ass often to avoid this shit, and id like to have no hair in my ass but dammn im not shaving that area
i do shave benos and balls tho
>>
>>42880900
You don't shave your ass hair?
Ass hair is the culprit for swamp ass. You need to swipe with a razor on the daily
>>
>>42880927
sounds like easy way to give yourself ass fissure
>>
>>42880949
This anon is right. Trim your ass hair, never shave.
>>
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>>42868167
>>
>>42868010
No way she's 5'9" 110 with those arms. I dated a girl who was 5'8, 105 at the heaviest and she was still a literal twig. She's definitely lying about her weight.
>>
>>42868010
i can tell by her skin tone and arm fat that she is white thrash
>>
>>42877880
Different poster, but I care.

I'll even cut/rip up a new tampon just to prove you're full of it.

What "absorbent material" inside? You mean cotton? Because that's what tampons are made of, you dumb fuck.

Keep telling yourself you ate a tampon of a disgusting chick's vagoo if it makes you feel better, but it's simply not true.

You tongued out yeast, and you should feel bad.
>>
>>42881058
not him, but i dont know whtas worse
>>
>>42877465
>>42867873
>>42868030
Wtf why are you fucking pussies not telling the chick outright she is fucking disgusting? The sex was ruined at that point anyway, why even pretend like nothing was wrong in her not even having the decency to uphold some hygiene standards? Now these chicks just keep going on ruining sex for other guys, these moments might have been learning point for them.
>>
>>42868084
i don't have an image for this
>>
>>42881058
>you tongued out yeast, and you should feel bad.

This shit keeps getting better and better
>>
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>>42868084
>>
>>42880353
It can't be helped when you're horny dude
>>
>>42868010
You stupid or something? Shes clearly lying about her weight, she's like semi fat.
>>
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>>42868084

>I've been chewing on fucking disintegrated tampon particles for almost 40 minutes
>>
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>>42879207

>>"y-you're fucking papa johns breadsticks muh lady," *tips papa johns delivery driver hat
>>"b-better ingredients.... b-bett..."
>>
>>42878855
There are naturally blonde Greeks, even though they are the minority of Greeks thanks to Turks raping them for half a millenia
>Had a eurocentric name too
Greek names are European names...
Thread posts: 153
Thread images: 29


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