I showed her my spaghetti

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> Meet a girl
> thought she had feelings for me for years
> tried to see if she liked me
> pool party at friends house
> its her birthday this weekend
> gave her protien bars on her birthday because she always says" im weak"
> " you're not weak, you just need more gains for your strong heart (shes actually very, very kind)
> thanks me, have good conversation about life
> let the night roll on, having good time with friends
> wait till were all leaving
> catch her by herself near her car
> "wait is it, anon?"
> pull actually spaghetti out of my pocket
> she laughs, knows whats it means, puts it in her pockect
> my heart skips a beat, moment of truth
> ask her if she has feelings for me
> "no, im in a relationship of 2 years, you know this. Im in love with her, anon"(she's bi)
> Always knew this, realized whta i did was fucking ignorant and foolish.
> she takes out the spaghetti, throws it on the ground, steps on it
> " You have to let this go, anon. Im stomping this out now. We can still be friends"
> Suddenly a lot of emotion on my face, fight back .
> she sees this and she immediately feels bad, she does damage control
> mature the fuck up, tell her "its fine, i understand".
> I leave after the conversation asap.
> Just feel like an ignorant beta.
> my emotions took over my logic
> why did i put her through that?
> what did i except?
> feelsreallystupidandbadman

Just let me have it, /fit/. Tell me how terrible i am so i can just get over this.