I want to change my life. Why is it so difficult?

>>42634771
Because want is not doing. Don't think, just do. Get your reps in, learn later.

>>42634771
You're afraid of failure.

Because you are a weak pathetic human being who will always make excuses forhimself. Now get off your lazy ass and get moving.

>>42634771
lifting is easy
changing your genetics is hard

because you want results in 1 day

>>42634771
I think you have to understand how much of your personality and behavior traits are burned into your DNA and how much has been conditioned into you from child.

Once you start to grasp that, you can start to make real changes.

>>42634771
Because anytime you start something new, it will be difficult and you will suck at it. This is true with everything you will ever do that isn't drugs or alcohol. Nobody enjoys doing things that are difficult and has no immediate reward for doing it. That is why people procrastinate to the point of never starting.

You have to change your opinion on trying new things. Understand that you will suck at anything you do for the first time but if you continue to do it you will eventually be good at it, and the more time you spend on that activity the better you will be and the better your results will be. Look at every failure as a necessary step to stop failing.

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>>42634783

This.

We all are though.

Face your fears.

>>42634783
Not OP but all I do is fail whenever I try
It's not just fear that holds me back, I just want to be able to not have social anxiety but I literally do not have the ability to fluently talk on command, I have some kind of problem with making words and talking normally. Talking is so hard and everything I say is a premeditated idea, I don't have the ability to just talk without thinking. If I do that then I either make no sense or I am just annoying/weird to people.

I can't just stop overthinking things because of my limitations but the way my mind reacts to my limitations just makes me even more limited. What do I do?

>>42634883
You're not alone in those feels...

Emotion. Learn to wait until your feelings subside and you remember why you want to do something new.

>>42634771
>Why is it so difficult?
Because the good in life doesn't come easy. I got fit once, slipped out of it and I just can't get myself out of this current slump I've got into. I'm in my early 20's and even my parents are asking if I'm depressed.

Kind of just sleep all day or stay in bed, sometimes don't wash for days and just don't do anything. I've realized lately it has gotten bad because I don't even like/play vidya anymore.

Just gotta persist, that cozy happy life is just right round the corner.

>>42634771
It's hard because you're doing something you don't enjoy. I tried to change my life by eating less and using a treadmill, and it didn't work because I don't like eating less and treadmill is boring AF. I started lifting and found that I don't have to eat less, and I'm addicted to lifting in a way I could never be doing cardio.

Find whatever activity you enjoy and master it. Force yourself to do at least 1 month of it to see if the habit sticks. Mostly every kind of activity that isn't sitting on your butt playing videogames sucks for the first month.

Start a business with growth potential

>be me
>21, at uni no idea what the fuck I want to do after
>sometimes would be sitting somewhere or something and suddenly become aware that I was depressed as fuck for some reason, still don't know desu
>starting to dread life after uni as me not wanting anything in particular will be sure to land me in some nothingy job
>decided to start business with my friend last year (product business in the UK dairy industry) to fulfill our unrealistic dreams of running a multi million pound business
>never really expected it to work although we tried our best
>built up skills over time, learned to gauge the market well
>managed to get funding for up scaling
>managed to get mentoring from RBS and various industry giants
>everyone likes the idea and the time for our products is perfect within the current climate
>been at it 4 years and sales have exploded
>business due to turn over more than £7m this year
>just put down my deposit on a £1.7m beautiful penthouse in town
>even my gains improved and now can squat almost lmao5plate

Best thing I ever did, for both my life and my mental well-being.

>>42634958
Are you the guy who sells protein? I watched a video on some guy in the UK making big bucks doing that.

>>42634792
>hard
But possible?

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>>42634883
Get. Angry.

>>42634958
I work in the dairy flavors industry. What is your company and what do you make?

>>42634883
This is just lack of practice.

Talk more to people, try to be more conversational with those you interact with everyday, try not to let awkward silences into the conversation and all that.

And listen to radio and podcasts. It can give you an idea of how to carry a conversation, tell a story, etc. Try listening while thinking about what you'd say if you were there. It's a bit autismo but it helps.

>>42635147
Not OP but I think people think getting mad is bad motivation and that all motivation should come out of happy thoughts but thats fucking gay.

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How to build and maintain a social circle? My parents are autistic friendless shut ins as well so I have no idea what do

>>42634771
because you actually don't want to change and are contempt with where you are.

>>42635222
I listen to podcasts to help with speaking. I don't even play video games but I listen to everything totalbiscuit puts out because I like his speaking style. I let it soak in and over time it's helped improve my own public speaking voice.

>>42635260
Develop hobbies and interests that can lead to good conversations and approach people at work, school, gym or whatever you do.

>>42635329
alright faggot, fuck total biscuit heres what you need to listen too


1. Patrice O'neal on Opie and anthony
theres over 100 of these that are 1-4 hours long, he's also dead now but this is by far the best shit

2.legion of skanks podcast
shitty name but its 3 nyc comics and its pretty good

TB is a fucking fag

last tip, you're gonna say weird shit. it happens, if you analyzed what everyone said you realize people fuck up in talking to each other all the time

you need to practice so you give a fuck less

i belive in you

>>42635242
self-hatred is the best motivator ive found to binge eat enough to make gains. I think as long as you have passion either from positivity or negativity that's still a good enough catalyst for change. Which is still better than no change.

that's the only time i'd recommend negativity though

>>42635242
I may get some shit for it, but as a white guy who came up in a middle to upper class family, I take a lot of motivation from rappers like 50 Cent, Yung Jeezy, and Yo Gotti.

A business mind with a thuggish outlook is exactly what you develop to succeed.

>>42635329
I like Bill Burr's podcast, particularly because I'm really envious of his hability to ad lib for over an hour.

I think that's what makes a good speaker/communicator too. Personally, I love when I'm talking to someone and the person just starts having a monologue about something they like and I can just nod and interject a few questions here and there. Doing all the heavy lifting in a conversation, if done properly, puts the other person at ease, so it's something I really wish I could do.

>>42635387
Nah, faggot. Don't be angry at yourself.

Be angry at your situation. Get cocky and arrogant. Believe in yourself and carry the anger to fuel and focus your actions.

>>42635363
Add Cum Town to that, because Nick somehow makes being a weird autistic loser a good conversation device, and we can all learn from that.

>>42635387
I was and still slightly am a fat fuck.
Maybe I feel this way because it sounds nice but for so long I looked at myself as a victim and not the one causing my problems

then i started thinking about individualism and it sparked me. i was the reason shit in my life sucks and i was a pussy for letting it get this out of hand, my politics during this drastically changed too

>>42635431
i was thinking of adding that one in, cum town is good

>>42634883
Take it from the Baconator
>Reading maketh a full man, conference a ready man, and writing an exact man.

>>42635484
What does "conference" mean in the context of whenever Francis Bacon was around?

>>42635363
>1. Patrice O'neal on Opie and anthony
Listen more for Ant desu. He can make anything interesting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVWM5MaVHsQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-dzkjmNFeY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7DWsjMP-kI

>>42634771
Because permanent damage has already been done. All you can do is do what you can.

>>42634771
Everything is a toxic routine. You claim to "want to change your life," but your lower self disagrees.
Admit that, deep down inside, you want to piss away time on 4chan. You made this thread now. Clearly some part of you wants to be here.
Admit that, deep down inside, that it's comforting to lose yourself in easy things like porn, compulsive vidya, shitposting.
Admit what you know deep down: ALL of it feels good, and it's weakening you.

There will come a time, anon, where you get so fed up with your own bullshit, that you would rather kill yourself than continue living as the worthless hollow shell that you've become.
When you reach that point, it's time to wrap up that chapter of your life. Never forget how pathetic that you used to be, and let that fuel you and propel you to change.
I used to edge myself to porn for upwards of eight hours per day. Often I'd only eat one meal a day because I'd get too wrapped up in being a degenerate to break away from porn and eat something. Add fucking Adderall to the mix and, wew, I was fucking gone.

But that lifestyle has a very short shelf life, and eventually you have to walk away from the screen. It's at that point you'll truly begin to notice, without question, just how much you've been fucking yourself over.

I'm losing weight and working out 6 days a week (PPL+Cardio.) I've lost 36 pounds, I only have 10 pounds to go, but I don't feel like I've put on any muscle, despite eating 170g of protein and lifting heavy for the last 3 straight months. No, I don't expect to be yoked, but I would expect some sort of noticeable gains. Absolutely nothing... I'm running on faith /fit/.... when will I put on any muscle...

>>42635587
How's your strength gains? Losing 3lbs a week is too big a deficit to expect to recomp on.

>>42634771
it's all about systems.
everything is a system.

You know how you're forced to care on some level in your job? You know how your job has systems to do things?
Well bring that organization into your own life.
Organize your shit like a business.
Like, you should be able to break up your life into little algorithms that accomplish things.
Employ those little algorithms into some kind of routine. Now you're winning.

Also you need to have metrics.
I use RescueTime.

Mostly though, help is out there, you just don't want it badly enough.

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>>42634771
>I want to change my life.
Why? Just be a bottom-feeding NEET like me. You'll need rich parents, though.

>>42634771
Because if it was easy, everybody would do it!

>>42635664
I'm so sick of doing this. Probably just because my dad isn't rich enough where I don't feel bad taking money from him. He just spent $18,000 on my lawyer so I wouldn't go to prison and that was like 3/4rds of his life savings.

>>42636039
WTF nigga

>>42636061
He picked the most expensive lawyer though so it's 100% my bad, probably could've fought it for $8000 because I still ended up going to jail anyway. Now I'm getting my third bachelor's degree which he's also paying for and I only had a job for 4 months of my life, once.

>>42636115
You should consider killing yourself to stop burdening an actual good human being.

>>42636039
Story?

>>42636129
No I like life a lot. Also that would hurt my dad way more than me being a leech. He told me he only lives for me.
>>42636196
Some guy shipped a box of weed to my house and told the authorities that he did so because he's a federal informant. Not really interesting. Just pure war on drugs stuff. Felons we out here

>>42635158
Sorry but I can't risk guys here fucking with it, anything I tell you about the name of the product would be a giveaway. What's your work?

>>42634995
No but plan to go into it if the market here stabilizes somewhat as it's hectic just now