fit-poop cherry

I had a similar situation happen to me.
I were out buying ciggies when on my way back my bowels started rumbling something fierce.
I basically had to walk/ jog a kilometer back home trying to hold in exploding diarrhea in my anus, it's was a fucking nightmare.
I immediately just RELEASED when i got home.
I learned my lesson that day.

Can't believe i found somewhere relevant to share this experience.

>>42608333
Lemme guess, UK?

>>42608356
Close, but no cigar.
Australia.

>running and making great time.
>6 miles in with 6 miles to go.
>sudden cramps
>the baby is coming... oh god.
>see an open house and sprint to the door. no fucks given. only one thought in brain—MUST POOP.
>LOCKED. ohfuckohfuckohfuck.
>Jump fence into backyard and run under the back porch.
>Unleash seemingly endless supply personal brew ass coffee.
>Total relief when I hear the sliding door open.
>PANIC
>Hear real estate agent "and this is the back porch with views of blah blah"
>Buyer "Oh my god. It smells like something died out here."
>Start laughing like an idiot and run out. Real estate agent and buyer stare at me in disbelief as I jump the fence and run away.

>>42608333
what was the lesson? always take your porta potty with you?

>>42608381
kek

>>42608383
>Don't ignore your farts before going for a walk.
I don't know, i guess I didn't learn anything

>squats at home
>about 4 in
>stomach grumbling
>turd shoots out at max depth
>flies through baggy shorts
>skids on floor
>garage smells like shit now
>clothes smells like shit even when washed

File: IMG_0083.png (58KB, 750x750px) Image search: [Google]

58KB, 750x750px

>>42608376

A few years ago I was in the habit of biking to work. 11 mile ride, loved it. Summer hit, and I kept on. Urban area, but mostly nature trails right to the front door of work.

Hot day, idgaf. Set out, business as usual.

Halfway, the rumble starts. Nowhere to stop, no options except the bushes until I get to work.

Powering through. Rumbling harder and harder. Start really fucking sweating.

Painful rumbling. Can't stop. Those bushes look good, but the trail is pretty well traveled. Public indecency charges for sure. Keep pedaling.

Sweating too much. Hot as fuck. Having to dismount and penguin walk every 5 minutes.

Heat stroke setting in from the extra sweating, which makes the shits worse.

Last 1/4 mile is a 20% grade. Had to walk the bike. Frequently stopping to consider my own death. Drawing stares.

Crest the hill. Work across the street. Get the bike locked, grab a drink on the way to the can.

Literally one men's toilet in the building. This guy nobody likes in there talking on the phone, taking his time. I'm seeing spots at this point. Beg the dude to c'mon.

He takes his time, looks at me like I'm an idiot when he gets out. Fuck him.

Finally get my chance. Blast that shitter with 30 minutes worth of fermented magma while sipping my drink.

I shit blood for 3 days after that.

But I didn't shit my pants.

Have ulcerative colitis
New job
Health insurance for first time in years
Meds haven't kicked in yet
Be on the bus
Long over an hour trip with two busses
Just get on second bus with a half hour ride
Shit diarrhea pains start
On no
Can't get off, in the middle of no where
Lucky the bus isn't that busy
Manage to put napkins on my anus
Shit a little, but it feels like a lot
Some goes down my pants
Napkins didn't help
Started to smell a little
My excuse would have been gas
Lucky I was close to a middle door and a little air
So embarrassed now
Manage to tie my jacket around my waist
Finish bus trip
Need to walk 15 min up hill
Pains start again
Shit in someone's yard off the main street
At this point almost crying
Make it to work and spend almost 20 min in the bathroom cleaning up
Keep jacket around me the whole day so no one sees the stains

Well that was one of my worst days ever.

>>42608376
CIGGIE BUTT BRAIN

>at gym as a teenager
>tiny gym only had machines
>doing leg presses
>try do to a 1RM
>let out a huge fucking fart as I strain
>there was another machine within a metre of mine
>qt doing some leg shit
>she was close enough to feel the vibration through the floor

I left right after

>>42609199
>not waiting for the braphog to accept your offer

Ngmi

>be 13 y/o me
>ate some delicous penn station sub and fries with friends on weekend night
>after decide to go dingdong ditching because that's what keeds do
>just ate a lot and immediately do running after no good for my tummy
>after a couple houses stomach starts to get upset
>"guys I gotta take a shit"
>at least a mile away from my house
>we're next to an elementary school
>I don't squat because weak legs but go into crab position
>take diarrhea shit in the backyard of an elementary school
>wipe my ass with boxers and throw them away in a garbage can and go commando home
>also saw in the school parking lot two teenagers having sex in their car
it was a memorable birthday for me tbqh