Normie /fit/ advice

Dad
>Hey anon, why you go gym? Try to be strong? Come work with me, hammer all life, you strong huh?

Until very recently he was unironically stronger than me eating 1 bowl of oats a day, smoking 10-15 cigarettes and drinking 4 cups of espresso while I toiled away at the gym.

I think I'm only stronger now because I'm 25 and he's 56. But dudes still built like a fucking ox.

Mom
>anon you are skinny eat!
>"Mom, I've gotten fatter..."
>Yes you are mama's fatty now eat

>wide grip pullups make your back wider
>narrow grip pullups make you thicker

>>42312234
>If you walk while swinging your arms, you will burn more energy.
>Eating a salad with avacado in it is healthy for you
>Eating broccili steamed is good for you
>Eat a bland bowl of oats every morning and you will get strong.
I think the last one is true though. I mainly just get two slices of bread and peanut butter for my breakfast in the morning. This is all from my mom by the way
>Anon, you know everything already for lossing weight. So why haven't you lost weight yet?
Because you always end up making my weight loss about you?

>>42312342
I'm not sure you understand the thread, those are all pretty valid

>>42312342
I'll explain what I mean. When she means swinging my arms, shes talking about like swinging my arms as if I'm walking in a NK parade where they swing their fucking arms up all the way.
>Walking is better for you than jogging. You weigh so much right now, you'd probably snap your knees out. Just walk three times a day and don't drink soda, and you'll lose so much weight.
Sometimes I don't get my mom.

>>42312342
Everything she said is true tho.

It sounds like you're making a scapegoat of your mother when talking about your weight loss. My suggestion would be to nut up and download my fitness pal and actually count calories instead of blaming your mom for making your weight loss about her. That sounds like a ridiculous excuse.

a guy at my gym recently told me that after 1-2 years of lifting you will need to take a booster before working out because after 1 year your testosterone runs out

>>42312402
Okay now I know you're trolling.

Your mom is giving you great advice.

>>42312407
Hang on a minute. When I say she wants me to make it about her, I already have a set schedule of what I do. She tries to add to it, so she can feel like she is acomplishing something. She isn't the best person to give me advice, since she smokes like a chimney, has diabetes, is overweight and eats mayonaisse with any vegetable within reach. Thats why I have a problem excepting advice from her, because she isn't practicing what she preaches.

>>42312421
doesn't mean what she's saying is wrong faggot

>>42312417
I'm not trying to troll. She thinks I know everything about fitness, and I don't. So when I tell her I don't understand, she acts as if I'm playing stupid. I want to loose weight because its for me. Yet when I'm doing my own thing, she has to butt in and try to make suggestions that are sometimes just shit she finds online.

>>42312402
Terrible b8

>>42312426
Then why the fuck should I listen to someone who doesn't even do what they want me to do? Its like this: I walk twice a day because its so hot, once in the morning and evening, and get about 9 to 10,000 steps. My mom tends to tell me stuff all the time about how its better her way, even though she doesn't know what she is talking about.

>>42312448
You seem like a special little fatty who can't what the point of the thread is.
This isn't where you complain about your mother

>>42312342
Your arms are connected to your opposite leg, your mum is right.

Front of body: Serratus anterior > external oblique > internal oblique on opposite > Adductors

Back of body: Latissimus dorsi > thoracolumbar fascia > glute max on opposite > IT band/

>>42312448
Have you ever heard one of the vocal coaches that singer hire? Most of the time they sound horrible but they can train people because they tell them how to fix their pitch, even if they themsleves can't

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>>42312468
this

My mom will blame every minor ailment I have on whey protein (gold standard), her reasoning:
>I just don't trust the chemicals they put in there

Other things she has said
>eating to gain weight doesn't help build muscle

>creatine is as bad as steroids

From other people I've gotten these.

>you should be ATG when deadlifting, always

>Going from skinny to muscular will cause stretch marks

>crossfit

>machines eliminate the need for form, they do the form for you

and the winner,
>"Form is important, but not nearly as important as weight"
actual quote from friend I tried to get into lifting, I gave up shortly after that.

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>>42312479
>you should be ATG when deadlifting, always

>you need supplements bro!

>>42312479
>Going from skinny to muscular will cause stretch marks
This happens very often desu