Fitness Cruise

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avast, I be capn' Cruz, and I have come for yer scoops

now hand 'em over, or ye'll be doing....CARDIO

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>Awk! Hand over the scoops!

>>41994959
nigger

24 hour buffet
Sauna / steam room
Gym
PWO bar
>tfwnogf

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>Captain! A sea Monster™ spotted!

>>41994959
>push day
>ship changes direction

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Welcome aboard!

>>41994959
>gay singles cruise

Ay ye filthy sea dogs!
Don't drop yer deadlifts or ye'll sink the bloody ship

>>41995413
>have to choose between this or rippetoe for personal trainers
:S

>>41994959
>no grils allowed

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>In order to evacuate in an emergency, you must deadlift the lifeboats

>load cruise with enough fatties that their combined weight causes the boat to very slowly sink
>passengers face certain death unless they can collectively drop a enough weight to right the ship before the cruise's end
It's a metaphor

>>41995643
>lazy fatties deny ship sinking
>say theyre making it float better

>3000 people
>2700 in their rooms shitposting until the gym empties so they don't have to socialize
>100 people at the buffet
>100 people doing deadlifts
>100 person gay orgy in the locker room

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>masT becomes the ship's mast

>Come aboard the Blast n Cruise Cruise
> departing from humanity

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>going fishing for gain
>ran out of free bait

>>41995643
>>41995722
This ship will float at any weight

>>41995168
very witty
one kek for you

>>41994959
welp, you can definitely take any kind of barbell out of the gym. Becomes huge liability if there is a barbell

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>>41995168
Very clever, anon.

>>41995969
all guest rooms are on one side of the ship
if all the fattys spend all their day sleeping/doing nothing in their beds the ship will tilt

>>41995168

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>>41995168
Very clever anon, here is a (you)

>>41994959
>>manlets walk the plank
>Cruise liner is now completely empty

>>41994959
>free weights on a non stable platform
Looks like we might beach on Snap Island

>>41994959
What's it going to be called?
Testanic?
USS Two Scoops?
The Piana?

>Please do not feed the blokes inside the manlet pool

>>41997125
Its USS SS obviously

>>41997238
*manlet puddle

>>41997125
The SS NoHomo

>>41995058
>scoops
>not delegates
1 job

we name it the SS Gomad

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>>41998400

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>>41995058
>>41995075
You'll never take me alive!

>>41998400
Perfect.

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>>41998400
10/10

>>41994959
>not owning a fitness submarine so you can hit proper depth

>>41995446
I'll choose Goobert any day over Rippletits

Scooby might get uncomfortably close to my ass, but I'm comfortable enough sexually (I think) to get over it since he knows his shit.

>>41995643
They will just argue that they're more suited for the sea since fat is technically more buoyant than muscle.

>>41998400
top kek

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>>41998400
Nice

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>>42000579
Gave me a chuckle.

>>41995969
that's not how buoyancy works anon

get enough fatties and the ship will sink

>>41994959
If the manlets walk the plank, then who will entertain us, also who will squat the turbines in the manlet pit to move the ship?

>>42000949
You missed the joke anon

>>42000609
They're whales anyway

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>>41995814

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>>41995857
The flag won't be very high then.

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>This is your captain speaking. There's been a bit of a mix up with the passengers of this crews and next months. We have far less women on board than what was expected. In fact there are none. On the positive side, all locker rooms are available for use.

>mid squat
>ship hits wave
Congrats you now have permanent spin damage

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>>41994959
>manlets walk the plank

there goes 93% of the ship.

>>41997341

that doesn't /fit/ in with with the /fit/ theme you fucking asperger

>hitting an iceberg
>everyone's climbing on it to cool the balls and boost test

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>>41998400
It's perfect

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>>41995075 Im fucking dying over here fuck you

>>41997239
Fucking kek

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>>41998400

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>>41995168
lmao

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>>41995168
>>41998400

>>41995058
>>41995075
>filenames
Kek'd

>>41998400
>4 week cruise
>3000 people
>ship needs to bring 84000 gallons of milk

>>41995058
>>41995075
Why is this so fucking funny holy shit

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Caribbean cruise for maximum vanity lifting.

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>>41998400
underrated