[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | Free Show | Home]

mirin stories

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 318
Thread images: 56

File: 1434431084250.jpg (293KB, 1280x816px) Image search: [Google]
1434431084250.jpg
293KB, 1280x816px
mirin stories, keep each other motivated
>>
>heading to party at beach house
>bro texts me "get water"
>pick up two 24-packs of water bottles
>park far away, decide to try and carry both at once
>easier than I expected
>meet up with girls as I'm walking in
>"wow anon your arms look big, can we feel?"
>never had my arms groped before
>"holy shit they're huge"
>inner monologue: "you still can't deadlift 350"
>still feltgoodman
>>
File: hurrrrrr.png (65KB, 205x239px) Image search: [Google]
hurrrrrr.png
65KB, 205x239px
>leaving work
>see group of girls giggling and looking at me
>one is on her phone with it tilted weird
>whatever.osx
>get home
>brother "theres a pic of you on this girls snapchat story"
>fukinhelliknewit
>pic of me punching out with a smiley face under it
>uh

don't know if i should be creeped out or flattered
>>
>>41766582
does anyone have the original pic of that brazilian kid with the great ass
>>
im too ugly to get mires.
>>
File: 1482429225239.jpg (280KB, 1080x1869px) Image search: [Google]
1482429225239.jpg
280KB, 1080x1869px
>freshman year
>dating some bitch
>using her as a front to meet other bitches
>make out with many
>some say i fucked them, lies
>do this until senior year
>land 8/10
>rock eachothers world for a year
>break it off before college
>feels
>decide to go on the pussy prowl of a lifetime at college
>slaying bitches for about two months
>lifting on the side
>im an americ an psycho
>Mirin in the mirror as i fuck
>mid terms come along
>enter qt 19yo virgin
>9/10
>brown hair in a pixie cut
>gorgeous green eyes
>an aspiring med student
>i ask her for a lesson in anatomy
>plays hard to get
>"hmm. are those muscles or are your arms just full of shit?"
>work on her like its a heist
>"see for yourself'
>flex my arm so she can feel
>"looks like you need a stool softener"
>she called my muscles hard
>"ill give you some" >wat?
>"ill sell you some stool softeners"
>for some reason i ask how much
>i need about tree
Now it was at this point that i realized this wasnt a 9/10 qt med student but was actually an 8 story tall crustacean from the paleozoic era
>>
File: 1483502506390.png (681KB, 1440x1124px) Image search: [Google]
1483502506390.png
681KB, 1440x1124px
>>41766642
kek
>>
>sitting in uni campus going over notes for speech
>2 qts in gym clothes walk by
>blonde at looks back at me
>nudges her friend and motions at me
>stare intensely at my notes until they walk away
alpha male shit
>>
>>41766642
10/10
>>
File: 1480272645824.jpg (39KB, 485x481px) Image search: [Google]
1480272645824.jpg
39KB, 485x481px
>>41766642
>>
>>41766642
this didnt add up fro the get go
>>
>>41766619
flattered fosho
>>
File: 1370725400529.jpg (26KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
1370725400529.jpg
26KB, 640x480px
>Be me
>Pretty empty gym today, one other guy in the free weights
>He finishes up and leaves
>I move over to an empty bench and do some dumbbell presses
>QT skelly grill ventures over to free weights
>Tries to move a nearby incline bench with wheels by dragging it
>I finish my set and put the weights down
>Stand up and put my hand up to get her attention
>Grab the handle on the front of the bench, move it to the proper area for her
>She says "Haha, thank you! This is why I need a workout partner!" and smiles at me
>Go back to my sets like an autist
>>
>>41766674
HAHAH

i know that pain
>>
>be me
>not you
>me
>earn lots of money
>like a whole lot
>especially for my age
>drive a nice car
>company offers good benefits
>decide to start lifting
>6 weeks into ICF 5x5 (thank you based jason)
>finish up and decide to go to grocery store still in my tank top
>got that juicy pump going on
>get chicken, eggs, veggies, and rice, and some whey protein
>qt3.14 at register
>obviously mirin
>she asks if I found everything I need today
>I say yes
>im thinking of asking her to be my gf and make sex with me but im too much of a spaghetti spillin' sperg autismo
Anyone else have stories like this?
>>
File: 1496588550204.gif (3MB, 309x313px) Image search: [Google]
1496588550204.gif
3MB, 309x313px
>>41766723
>tfw my name is Craig
>>
>>41766723
SHOO SHOO, NO-GAINS CAT CRAIG!
>>
File: image.jpg (64KB, 484x519px) Image search: [Google]
image.jpg
64KB, 484x519px
>>41766763
do you have any gains? say goodbye to them now, you didn't shoo him away !!
>>
>>41766723
shoo shoo, no gains cat craig
>>
>>41766723
SHOO SHOO NO-GAINS CAT CRAIG!!!
>>
>>41766712
close one dude
>>
File: 1bbr7r.jpg (200KB, 1200x630px) Image search: [Google]
1bbr7r.jpg
200KB, 1200x630px
>>41766723
SHOO SHOO, NO-GAINS CAT CRAIG!
>>
>>41766582
How do you know if you're being mired, if it's not obvious? What are some signs?
>>
>>41766773
I am drinking :(
WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DONE...
>>
>>41766642
fake and gay
>>
>>41766582
>grandeur of delusion the thread

these threads are always fun to read. keep blog posting lads :)
>>
>>41766880
moist nips is usually what i go by
>>
>>41766619
Creep thread on tumblr
>>
I work with a bunch of fat old ladies

One is a chronic cheater and tries to put her hands on me any chance she gets

They also always tell me that a coworker likes me but she's also fat and old

Still no gf ;((
>>
>>41766900
>grandeur of delusion
>grandeur
>of
>delusion

nigger please proofread your posts
>>
File: 1491049709179.jpg (25KB, 641x530px) Image search: [Google]
1491049709179.jpg
25KB, 641x530px
>>41767023
there is literally nothing wrong with that post, friend.

also please dont use that profanity against me brainlet and speak properly.
>>
>>41766712
you can make it up to yourself by doing the opposite next time
>>
>>41767010
new job

or start fucking old ladys
>>
>>41766900
>>41767094

>grandeur of delusion

I really think you fucked up on this one anon, I'm with >>41767023

Pretty sure you meant "delusions of grandeur" or "grandiose delusions"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grandiose_delusions

eg: You have delusions of grandeur about your grasp of English grammar.
>>
Playing soccer at local indoor soccerplex. Finish game and the new team comes in for the bench to put their bags down. I grab mine and head over to the spectator benches. Pop off my shirt on the way so I can put on a dry one. Sit down on bench and start taking off socks and shoes.

Two girls (only ~6-7/10) sitting behind me. One makes a mm noise and the other 'whispers' "I told you this was a good place". Wasn't in great shape at the time but that felt gud.
>>
>>41766614
tfw deadlift 355 but 12" arms
>>
>>41767415
Hahaha Fucking dyel kid

8 inch arms Deadlifting 600lbs checking in
>>
>>41767324
They were being sarcastic
>>
>>41766636
Kys
>>
>>41766642
I guessed it's going to end with three fiddy, from the first two lines. Anyone who laughs at this is 100% a newfag
>>
File: 1492553487416.jpg (9KB, 400x343px) Image search: [Google]
1492553487416.jpg
9KB, 400x343px
>>41766614
>can't deadlift 350

YOU DONT DESERVE THOSE MIRES REEEEEEEEE GIVE THEM BAAAAAAACK
>>
>>41766900
>>41767094
Lmao kys you illiterate nigger faggot.
>>
I posted this in another one but that thread didn t gain traction:

>be me
>work in a grocery store pulling in carts from the parking lot
>see a qt ask who I had a class with in the past
>she comes up to me
>I go in for a handshake but she wants a hug, so I reciprocated
>As she's hugging she starts to rub my lower back very close to my butt
>we say our goodbyes
>As shes leaving she touches my bicep

Woulda asked her out but she got a bf. Oh well
>>
>>41766582
>be me.
>mired all the time if not daily by guys
>Only a couple times in past years by girls.
ill always remember this mire.
>Be me in class.
>assigned to a group
>I sit down
>rest my arms on the table
>A black girl glances at me and goes
>"Nice Arms! oh i didnt mean that in a flirty way or anything.."
>tfw she said "i didnt mean that in a flirty way or anything.."
I am fucking ugly huh bros :( still got mired atleast..
>>
I took a few years off, can someone catch me up on the lifeguard girl in OP?
>>
>>41767907
R E V E R S E P S Y C H O L O G Y
>>
>>41767933
I dont think highly of myself at all and i see myself as a dyel ugly manlet so i kinda believed her when she said that.
>>
>>41766619

POST BOD DESU
>>
Builtfat checking in

>Ran into some friends at a bar
>Friend is skinny lax player
>Steroids come up
>"Nah man if I did steroids I'd look like anon"

>Same weekend
>Drunk at a bar
>Make eye contact with wasted chick at the bar
>She drunk spaghettis at me, her friends come feel my shoulder and arm and "say wow big muslces"
>Pretty sure I just smiled and went back to flagging down a bartending for some bud lights

Thanks, lmao 2plate bench
>>
>>41766582
mirin those TITS
>>
>still drunk from the night before(bought some kracken and drank with one friend)
>After college course talk to girl that looks aight to me
>Talk and walk back to her car
>Practically invite myself into her car
>Talk to her for awhile but I have to piss because I drank a pint and hour earlier
>Say she's always found me attractive
>Wut
>Say's it's the way I carry myself and talk to friend
>Tfw atp and t rex also dadbod
>Fuck I have to piss
>Tell her I'm going to the movies and she could come along
>Accepts
>Run to the cafeteria and piss
Felt good to be mired even though dadbod
Also she said I look intimidating.
>>
>>41768355
Sorry for spelling and grammar. On treadmill rn
>>
>walk with shirt off
>some guy on a 3 wheeler goes past me with helmet on
>glances back towards me several times as getting further away from me
mirin
>>
>>41767909
It's Amanda Wenk
https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/Amanda_Wenk
>>
>never saw a real reason to lift other than looking good naked and posing for art classes
>get to know a girl
>shes a pro-swimmer
>1,80m and 68kg and no gram of fat
>that back, those arms, those shoulders and that ass
>as we make out i pull off her clothes and she seems to "fight back"
>stop and ask her if im to pushy and if we should stop
>she tells me its a thing she needs
>wants to "fight back" and overwhelm the guy, likes to be in control
>the guy before me was always "manhandled" by her
>notthistime.jpg
>get on with undressing her
>she "fights back" and i just grab her hands and put them in a lock on her back
>seems confused and tries again
>after she fails to overwhelm me she starts kissing me like she wants to swallow my horny soul
>she tells me what to do while being handled
>"fuck me!"
>do the exact opposite and lick her
>extend the foreplay while she tries to exit my grasp
>after she came from me eating her out i lift her up and start hammering her against the wall
>feels like she just became a cannibal
>wants to eat me alive, kissing, biting and scratching everywhere
>her muscular legs around me
>cant stand anymore and throw her onto the bed
>looks at me like i just gave her a diamond ring
>pin her down and start fucking her
>"please, dont stop"
>her legs around me tighten till it hurts my back
>bites my shoulder
>nails in my back
>most painful orgasm i have ever witnessed
>tells me that she loved it and really fought back with all her might
>as long as i handle her well i can do whatever i want

those were good times
>>
>im at my community gym
>shoulder day
>work out for hour and half
>spot qt and qt friend both 9/10
>qt friend is wearing a thong bikini
>holyfuk
>exits gym, puts on energency swim trunks
>procede to the wateringhole
>set bag on table
>"hi anon!" Qt says
>*shietmaan*
>"sup" pretending not to care
>both girls glance and stare at glistening muscles
>walk around pool, get in, notice them staring at senpai
>i work 2 hours in the gym every day for moments like
>notice them staring at body
>autistic as fuk, tries to think of conversation, fails
>awkward
>they leave eventually
>illbebackforyoumysweet.jpg
>>
>>41767010
What do u do?
>>
How long were you lifting berfore you guys got mired?
>>
>>41768763
Fuck ur mom ;)
>>
File: wojaktired1.jpg (36KB, 482x427px) Image search: [Google]
wojaktired1.jpg
36KB, 482x427px
>>41766582

> at work
> male coworker says "damn man you're looking bigger"
> at gym
> gym acquaintance says "looking fuller lately mate, put some weight on?"
> girls dont even acknowledge my existence
>>
>>41766723
SHOO SHOO, NO-GAINS CAT CRAIG!
>>
File: IMG_5433.jpg (14KB, 250x209px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_5433.jpg
14KB, 250x209px
>>41769117
iktf
>>
>>41767415
>>41767560
>"deadlifts are good for mass!"
>>
>>41767891
>I go in for a handshake

you'll never make it
>>
>>41766582
>be me at normie gym
>after workout, head to pool
>walk into pool area shirtless
>see qt probably 5 or 6 yo
>she stares at me, not bothering to look away when I look at her
>give her a wink

Little girl mires are the best.
>>
File: 6798.jpg (84KB, 500x482px) Image search: [Google]
6798.jpg
84KB, 500x482px
>tfw nobody in my class or campus notices my gains
>only got mired by a powerliftan bro and a girl that I asked to grope my pecs
>>
File: med_1451011113_image.jpg (53KB, 640x489px) Image search: [Google]
med_1451011113_image.jpg
53KB, 640x489px
>at dance club on saturday around 4am
>been drinking since early evening, just switched to water so I dont get hangover as fuck
>friends and gf out in the crowd somewhere
>not in the mood to dance anymore
>out of muh hydrating tapwater
>im sure as hell not getting up for another
>tap a random guys back, hes with a blonde okayish gal
>ask them to get me water if they are headed to the bartender
>they return with 3 jugs, thanks dude
>guy leaves, gal stays, initiates smalltalk
>whatever, nice to have company while waiting for the group im with
>blondie getting more and more touchy
>constantly touching my arms and back
>gf storms out of the crowd, kisses me, leaves
>blondie tells me that she recognizes a gf when sees one
>mfw
>leaves
>whatwereyouthinkingbitch
>>
>>41766712
You should have just ignored her. Maybe even laughed at her.
>>
File: 1451864062098.png (440KB, 645x1260px) Image search: [Google]
1451864062098.png
440KB, 645x1260px
>>41766582

>go out to get milk
>checkout girl seems to be looking at my face alot
>feels good man
>get to car
>food in beard

JUST
>>
>>41769302
>gf storms out of the crowd, kisses me, leaves
I love it when my gf passive-aggressively marks her territory like that, she also noticeably puts more effort in during sex afterwards.
>>
>>41769350
Yes, she does this a lot these days.
She gets hit on all the time too tho. Sometimes the guys are extremely low level on the 10 scale so I don't even bother intervening. She gets upset by this, me not giving a fuck.
>>
Tried Mdma for the first time at my uni end of year ball, ended being that guy who takes his shirt of and danced for 3 hours... Luckily I've been lifting for a while so look decent... literally could count the mires just looking around, 1 girl from my class kept falling into me and stroking my abs... we're all gonna make it my brehs
>>
>finish gymming
>did deadlifts so feeling that test rush still
>in tram, standing holding onto one of those vertical bars
>see some blond 7/10 at the end of the tram eyeing me over her sunglasses
>just laughed at something on phone and meet eyes with her
>do a sort of quick double eyebrow raise and smile as reflex
>she smiles back to me and gives me the biggest mirin eyes I ever seen

She got off two stops later and looked at me again (over her shoulder) while walking down the little two steps of the tram.

Felt pretty good men.
Too bad I have a gf.
>>
>>41769656
>Too bad I have a gf.

Grab gf by the hair.

Shove gf's face into blonde's pussy.

I don't see any problems here that you can't overcome.
>>
>>41766880
Double and triple takes from the mirers. Use your peripheral vision.
>>
>>41767855
fuck off
>>
>>41767953
She didn't mean it. She wanted the thicc.
>>
>Making myself in ufc 2
>mum walks in the room and says my pecs are bigger than my characters
Thanks I guess. Here's a less pathetic one:
>at the boxing gym
>female trainer constantly looking at me and paying more attention to me than the other students
>says stuff like "your stance is perfect for a beginner" and "you've got the jab down already?"
I'm just going to chalk that one up to my potential as a fighter.
>>
>>41769280
Leave
>>
>started going to the gym a month ago
>watch a movie with friends
>wear a wife beater because its hot as fuck and they're comfy
>one of of my friends whos been lifting for years comments that you can start seeing muscle in my body

just a noob but it made me feel good
>>
>>41769280
>Lifting for cunny

Anon you'll never achieve that creepy 70s pedo look that the young ladies truly mire
>>
File: image.jpg (61KB, 500x419px) Image search: [Google]
image.jpg
61KB, 500x419px
>>41766582
>7 months ago
>21 yearold freshman in college
>be skinny 6'3 skelly
>start lifting for self improvement
>wearing long sleeves because cold weather
>no one can see my scrawny body
>no one can find out i lift
>hide it from everyone
>months pass, people start asking
>lie about it
>warmer weather comes around
>i gained 30lbs of fucking muscle natty
>people asking if i work out more and more frequently
>everyone who knows me from before goes "holy shit when the fuck did this happen"
>hooked up with oneitis i met in college
>we go on our second date
>she's in my lap
>comments on how comfortable i am to sit and lay on
>wants to show me some shit near my collar bone
>feels my chest
>"where's the bone? Why is everything so meaty?"
>starts feeling me up
>"what the hell? This is so awesome hahaha"
>flex my pecs
>"oh my god haha"
>proceeds to feel up my arms, chest and back while i just sit and look at her
>she's all giggly and happy with her new discovery
>curdles in me and i put my arm around her
>she lets out a soft happy chuckle and grabs a tight hold of me
>mfw

We're still together and im quite sure its gonna stay that way for a long while, because we just have chemistry and im the happiest ive ever been.

Thank you /fit/
>>
>>41770068
My man
>>
got mired a few times recently, danced with a drunk chick at some bar and got told she has a boyfriend by some dude
>>
File: ijustwanttoreadsomenews.png (76KB, 1280x320px) Image search: [Google]
ijustwanttoreadsomenews.png
76KB, 1280x320px
>>
>>41770111
Something similar happened to me
>be at a party for local fire fighters
>see qt I haven't seen since high school
>was a skelly back then 6'1" 135 lbs
>she says I look so much manlier
> chat for a bit have a few beers
>wanna see my car?
>go to parking lot kissing in my car
> sperg lord turbo autist is out side screaming her name
>she says it's her "friend"
>I can tell he's obviously one of her beta orbiters
>he spots us
>sprints to the car
>"hey are you ok? We came together we should leave together"
>she tells him to wait he takes literally 2 steps back and stares furiously
>kiss her a little more and tell her I'll see her again
>scoop the digits and smile at him while she walks back

Felt good the second time we went out I commented on her purse mfw she told me that beta bought it for her
>>
> gf going to black magic circle with her friends
>invites me
>why not
>it's on Sunday morning, a 8 km drive to some creepy forest
>there are about 30 people
>lots of smoke, people screaming, doing generally uncanny stuff
>I get compliments here and there
>some lady walks up to me just to say "anon, you look great"
>feel gf's friends miring
>we spend the whole day summoning satan

Mfw too creeped out to go back to those mires
>>
File: 1497184099459.png (138KB, 375x736px) Image search: [Google]
1497184099459.png
138KB, 375x736px
Was walking down the beach yesterday, was making heads turn as I was walking by, veins popping and everything.

God bless this Tren.
>>
>>41769745
This is why women have no place as teachers

She lied to you cus she's attracted
>>
>>41770213
Devil mires, despicable.
>>
>>41770213
Go back. Then wgen its at the crescendo of their heretic chanting, tear off your shirt to reveal a cross sown into your chest and drive these filthy pagans into the ground with your blessed fists
>>
File: 1496697744711.jpg (30KB, 670x503px) Image search: [Google]
1496697744711.jpg
30KB, 670x503px
>work at shitty resturant
>constant flow of college students
>babes for days
>flirt with them
>never get anywhere
>gay dudes and old women have no problem complimenting me on my looks and telling me I'm good looking
>a couple dudes even propositioned me one time
>old lady mmmmmms when I bend down to pick up something that fell while wearing my straight legged slacks
>when a fruit or granny is mad my manager sends me to fix it because they usually soften up and calm down with me
>completely sexless
>telling classmate about how I get compliments almost daily but nothing from young attractive women
>teacher overhears
>"well you are a very attractove young man"

If I was gay or a wrinkle chaser I would be swimming in ass.
>>
>>41768686
damn i got a half-chub now
>>
I need confirmation
>be fat ass like 5'7 210 lbs
>goto gym for the first time
>its night so its kind of empty
>first step into the weight room and i lock eyes with this really hot girl
>gives me a smile
>notice that shes working out around me
>keep going to the same gym at the same time
>keep locking eyes
>her smile keeps getting bigger
>working out closer to me

Does she like fat guys or some shit? I've only been lifting for two weeks, none of this makes sense to me
>>
File: bruh.jpg (15KB, 411x358px) Image search: [Google]
bruh.jpg
15KB, 411x358px
I've literally reached the point where each time I lock eyes with a girl as she walks past, I count that as a mire.

Feelsbadman
>>
I was with a girl the other night and I couldn't get a boner, I don't know if it is the dead dick from porn or what, haha jdimsa , is there any Viagra users here? Is it legit?
>>
>>41770413
Maybe shes just being polite as she goes through her routine?
>>
>>41767907
>I-its not that i find you cute or anything, baka!
>>
>be 43 yo dyel
>go to dyel geezer gym
>only get mires from 50+ yo geezer men who mire the fact that I'm actually there to push myself instead of just phoning it in.
>>
>>41769350
This is a super common thing. Whenever you show that you can attract other women, your gf will go nuts. One time I kissed another girl during a play and my gf saw the play. That night was the best sex of my life.
If things are ever getting boring between you and your gf/wife, show her you attract other women, things pick up fast
>>
File: o.o original.jpg (94KB, 625x552px) Image search: [Google]
o.o original.jpg
94KB, 625x552px
>go on date with qt
>have a fun night but clearly neither of us is really into the other
>say our goodbyes and bike home
>hear someone shout my name within 30 seconds
>it's an even qt-er qt I know
>asks me to join her and her friends for a drink
>oblige and grab a beer
>her friends go watch some concert
>we stay outside
>asks me if I'm still training
>proceeds to ask if she can squeeze my biceps
>flex a 'cep as she feels me up
>she starts giggling a little
>asks if she can feel up my abs
>just cut weight for a competition so chiseled core
>she starts giggling uncontrollably as she rubs my abs
>mfw she's my cousin
>>
wew
>>
>>41770916
smash and have a retarded son
>>
>>41768686
This is my fetish pretty much to the word
>>
>>41770445
Bigger smiles tho man
The smiles say it all
>>
File: ryuko ponders this.gif (212KB, 189x189px) Image search: [Google]
ryuko ponders this.gif
212KB, 189x189px
>>41766642
I like it. But I don't get it.

And I like that.
>>
>>41770916
was bout to call a fake until the last line
>>
>>41770422
don't just look look at girls eyes anon, the biggest sign of a mire is if she's smiling or not.
>>
File: BigJB21.jpg (4KB, 326x67px) Image search: [Google]
BigJB21.jpg
4KB, 326x67px
>>41768686
>>
>>41770068
>30lbs. of muscle natty in 7 months

Doubt it, but good job nonetheless
>>
>>41770213
Wait I can't tell if this is a joke or not. Help
>>
File: fuggg.jpg (33KB, 480x454px) Image search: [Google]
fuggg.jpg
33KB, 480x454px
>>41771313
Don't ever recall there being smiles tbqhwymm.

At least I'm not that uggo for them to immediately look away, r-right?
>>
>>41769117
i know the feeling :D
ugly face?
>>
>>41768686
how did i get hard just reading this?
>>
File: dead.gif (2MB, 480x270px) Image search: [Google]
dead.gif
2MB, 480x270px
>>41769117
Yeap. Potato for a face reporting in.
>>
>>41771516
you're too in your fucking head lol just relax be confident bro
>>
>>41766582
>no fatfuck wojak standing behind the fence
>>
File: 1490560104238.jpg (82KB, 590x500px) Image search: [Google]
1490560104238.jpg
82KB, 590x500px
>sat next to a 8/10 milf, her husband and their 11/10 daughter who looked to be in her mid 20's at the bar the other night
>I just wanted to win over the mom a little and then maybe hit on the daughter
>but the mom was a funny drunk and we ended up hitting it off immediately, really fun conversation about her party days and cities we've both been to and mountains etc etc it just went on and on
>all the while she was flirting with me grabbing my shoulder when she laughed and "pretending to hit me" when I said something sarcastic
>the dad and daughter were just kind of having their own conversation looking over at us every once in a while in disapproval
>this went on for probably 45 minutes until the dad started to get annoyed and they paid and said goodbyes
>then I was sitting there, alone again, enjoying what had just happened and the hot bartender that's out of my league came over and said "goin' for mama bear huh? I saw you guys and I was like '..get it!..'"
>then the night wound down sorry for the lame ending
>>
>>41771773
I know, right?!
>>
>>41770068
routine?
>>
File: 1458934454619.jpg (12KB, 315x283px) Image search: [Google]
1458934454619.jpg
12KB, 315x283px
>>41771892
>goin for mama bear huh?
>>
>>41770068
Good job anon. Now you just have to leave this place forever to truly make it.
>>
>>41771912
lol that guys is a beta whether or not he looks like a 0/10 or 10/10 hes wearing black op 2 tshirt
>>
>>41766582
>be manlet
and it was all just a dream

i feel so fucking angry right now i need to get it out i dont give a fuck if its socially retarded

i hate my retarded bitch sister, she is 19, im 20
>>
>>41772010
Yeah, man, that's clearly the main reason he doesn't score any pussy, ha-ha!
>>
>>41770442
Sometimes I wank daily but everytime I make out with a girl I get a boner instantly. Idk bro, maybe try nofap? It makes you last far shorter but you should be able to get it up faster
>>
>>41770458
can nigresses even be tsunderes?
>>
File: IMG_0717.jpg (458KB, 1242x2208px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_0717.jpg
458KB, 1242x2208px
So I often feel that I'm getting 'mired publicly, but too much 4chan has hammered it into my skull that it's all in my head and qts don't mire anyone ever because Chad fucks pizza.... BUT....

>be me
>just joined new gym where no one knows I'm ultra autismo plus girlfriend mode
>every single receptionist is 8/10 qt
>constantly feel their eyes on me when I'm lifting
>whatever they're probably just sizing me up because I'm the new guy
>bring buddy to gym for back workout
>ask him to take picture of me at the bottom portion of hex bar shrugs for maximum chest puff
>CATCHES ROASTIE RECEPTIONIST GIVING ME EYES ON CAMERA

I fucking knew it, /fit/, you pessimistic assholes.

Face edited for anonymity
>>
>>41768686
Se me puso gomosa.
>>
File: 1455800100486.png (428KB, 989x1018px) Image search: [Google]
1455800100486.png
428KB, 989x1018px
was my birthday this weekend so family took me out for my yearly social interaction.
>at "authentic" Sicilian restaurant
>qt waitress comes up to our table to offer drinks before we order
>she just locks eyes with me and you can see her brain sort of stop for a sec
>I just say hi and she keeps going as normal so I think nothing of it yet
>later when our food comes she goes to put my lmao1pl8 of lasagna down
>she has another brain fart
>knocks over some oil bottle or something
>I notice the bottle was sealed, she doesn't
>starts panicking, put my plate down and place the bottle back
>she still hasn't noticed it was sealed
>checks me out to see if I've got any on me
> "I'm fine, thanks"
>third brain fart
>weird silence, she's just standing there looking at me
>she starts apologizing while going back now that she notices there's no spill


Not sure if mire or really autistic waitress but I chose to believe she was mirin
>>
>>41772251
It not laik I EEEENTO yo' o' anythin', baka nigga.
>>
>tfw going from /fat/ to /fit/, 6'1 210 lb, muscular arms but visible beer belly
>visit mall with Mom and sister for monthly shopping
>Asian country, so there are like only 2 people taller than me here, almost everyone is either fat or skinny
>lots of older women miring arms, one stared for too long and her husband noticed and gave me the stink eye
>sister notices and asks me why are people staring at me

Felt pretty good today, and I'm still 45 lbs above my goal weight. We're all gonna make it bros
>>
>>41772386
She's not even at you, you delusional fuck

She's trying to count how much this ugly fuck is shrugging wow he's weak and ugly look at his eyes
>>
File: cje45.jpg (6KB, 300x200px) Image search: [Google]
cje45.jpg
6KB, 300x200px
>>41771892
Was waiting for the part where you double-cucked the dad with his wife and daughter
>>
>>41766636
Go die faggot
>>
>>41771147
Having children with your first cousin is about as likely to cause birth defects of children as a woman who waits until she's in her late 30s to have kids, instead of doing it earlier.

The taboo of cousins has only come around somewhat recently. Turns out historically nearly 80% of all marriages may have been between cousins.
>>
>>41772386
She's very cute
>>
File: 604.jpg (17KB, 236x305px) Image search: [Google]
604.jpg
17KB, 236x305px
>>41772251
>>41772497
I believe she needs to be above you in the social ladder and shy, both traits are unlikely but not impossible
>>
>>41772457
You could say she... spilled her spaghetti?
>>
>>41766642
shieet the crustacean strikes again
>>
>>41768686
>all these fags not knowing this is pasta
still a great post though
>>
>>41768613
lol, good one
>>
File: aepjZxv_700b_v1.jpg (78KB, 700x686px) Image search: [Google]
aepjZxv_700b_v1.jpg
78KB, 700x686px
>>41772681
They looked like the left two in pic related and the dad was a nerdy looking businessman, it was insane
I'm 24 and ~relatively handsome but certainly not chad
>>
>>41766642
Goddamn Loch Ness monster
>>
>go to health club since there's no decent gym nearby
>progressing steadily over the last year+
>be only person I've seen do 1/2/3/4 there
>killing my workout
>qt3.14 redhead instructor (THICC) approaches me
>says she's noticed my progress
>proceeds with semi-flirty smalltalk about lifting
>feel her eyes pierce through me
>whatisthis.jpg
Gonna ask her out, is this what making it feels like?
>>
>>41766642
Happens to the best of us
>>
File: IMG_2543.jpg (99KB, 595x779px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_2543.jpg
99KB, 595x779px
Who else pictures these mires being written by one of those many guys in your gym 25 yrs and older who think they are the shit because they have muscles but have a fucked up face, bad skin and worse fashion sense and are generally fucking delusional about everything including people "miring"
>>
>>41766740
>6 weeks into icf
>juicy pump?
>>
>>41773326
This. I'm not even fucking joking. How often do you see ppeople actually getting "mired". Even the fucking adonis faggots I know don't get "mired" like this. It's all visible in the body language of girls they talk to, but it is almost never as overt as these autists make it seem.
>>
>>41773342
just because ur weak and ugly doesnt mean everyone else is
>>
>>41768686
Literally my fetish. You've made it anon, keep a seat for me I'll be there soon
>>
>>41773342
I have some model-tier friends and what happens to them is hard to comprehend for most men.
>>
>be me
>prom is coming up in a few weeks
>went out with a couple of buddies
>one asks how I even got a suit considering my size
>>
>>41767094
Well that was quite a posting of fail
>>
>imo i have a few features that ruin my face
>imo im dyel
>imo no random people mire me
on the other hand
>i have lots of female friends
>they use me as the example when talking of muscles
>occasionally make up excuses to touch my chest and arms
>when i wear more power level revealing clothing they draw attention to me so that i blush and they tease me like it's some kind of sadistic fun for them

I don't know if I just live in another reality than them, it's all confusing as fuck. I just want to fug them without actually having to overcome my spaghetti spilling ability.
>>
>>41771225
She's telling you that you're gonna make it.
She wants you to make it.

Don't let her down.
>>
>>41772386
Why you wear a hat indoor?
>tatoo
>very weird fucking shoes to lift in
>beard is shit tier
>back looks non existant
Not being pessimistic asshole, just point things out bruh. Have a nice day and good luck!
>>
>>41770291
Seconding this! Drive out these satanists!
>>
>>41766636
He became an ugly girl
>>
>>41766582
Can someone give me the original of the lifeguard. Have been looking for it for years
>>
>go to gym this morning at 4am
>been trying to cut down to at least 12% bodyfat for my vacation
>really getting into my music and doing barbell lunges
>notice tall fit girl lifting in corner
>resting in between my set
>feel someone is staring at me and tall fit girl is just staring at me
>she smiles and I smile back
fuck yeah!
>>
Story from 3 hours ago.
>Be me lifting with 2 taller and heavier guys
>Jacked manlet
>Deadlifting 4pl8 for sets of 10
>2 /fit/ /thicc/ qt's in front of me squatting lmao1pl8
>they increase weight to 185 as I start my next set
>Unstable as fuck on the unrack
>Literally starts to fall the fuck backwards
>HeroModeActivated
>Drop the bar mid rep
>Catch the girls bar and OHP it so she doesn't bash the back of her head
>She turns around and hugs me while still having the bar pressed up
>Realize that shits heavy and rack it
>Get her number and mires from everyone in the vicinity
I felt alpha as fuck in that moment friends.
>>
>>41773828
Im picturing myself trying this, stumbling over the bar and headbutting her in the back having the bar drop down and cripple us both
>>
>>41766740
just ask for her number and smile pussy shit.

whats so fucking hard about it.
>>
>>41769777
Never underestimate noob gains
>>
Happened a few years ago
>be me
>go to a party with my roommates
>walk in and go up to my friend who is hosting it
>he's talking with a few people and he introduces us to them
>my roommate says something funny
>one of the girls were introduced to shakes my two roommates hands
>"you must be the nerdy one, you must be the funny one..."
>she then turns to me
>"and you must be the handsome one"
>she then just slides next to me and smiles hard

Every time I started tl get some one on one time with her some guy kept finding us and cock blocking me. And one of the few times I decided to carpool instead of take my own car so I couldn't dip out with her.
>>
>>41769777
dont ever justify wearing something, its an anonymous board.
>>
>>41766638
> i'm not confident with myself

Never gonna make it
>>
File: 1460997398159.jpg (58KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]
1460997398159.jpg
58KB, 480x360px
>delt pump from workout
>hot as fuck outside
>decide to walk dog shirtless
>golf cart full of half a dozen jailbait pass me by
>don't even look in my direction
When will it be my turn? I get steroid accusations when I post photos on /fit/ for fuck's sake.
>>
>>41773618
so did ur mom
>>
>>41773828
I've fallen backwards with 315 before

Just laffed it off

Didn't hit my head cause I just held on the bar. Traps was kinda sore tho
>>
>>41770325
IF you have female friends they will compliment because they feel comfortable. Random girls will not unless you seem inivting.

My example to prove.

>In Mc Donalds sitting on bit table eating double bicmac in 4 bites.
>theres some high schoolers sitting on table aswell
>one guy goes "damn you destroyed that burger"
>i respond with "yeah, hungry bro"
>i see this hnnggggg thick.jpg black chick ass/tits/face standing near me with ass facing me
>i clearly blatantly check her out
>as i walk to put rubish away she smiles at me (her friends must've told her i was staring at her ass)
>i smile back n finish my chips
>she leaves with her friends, i look at her ass as she's walking away through window
>she turns around and waves/smiling at me

^Naturally i look unapproachable but in this situation i blatantly was checking her out without shame which made me feel comfortable being flirty with me.
>>
>>41774389
Wow so alpha good work sitting there not doing anything
>>
>>41774280
Really taking it personally that one group didn't mire?
Besides, they were probably just intimidated that they'd get caught looking
>>
>>41773085
if ur 1/2/3/4 you already made it.
>>
>>41773476
girls not physically repulsed to touch you? yet u say no one mires you. Delusional autist. Change your personality, act confident n cocky = chicks will start feeling weird attraction to their x beta orbiter.
>>
>>41774226
Stupid stupid stupid, i hate you.

Simply say we should get some coffee sometime to get to know each other, whats your number?

then meet up. Simple..
>>
>>41774447
i had gf at time. my point was that girls mire if you show somewhat interest.
>>
>>41770916
>15
>solid
>>
>start lifting
>girls started saying I have nice muscles
>before that they said it's hot that I'm a basketball player

That's all lmao, it's not like I've touched any of them.
>>
>>41774566
She was in town visiting and was flying out the next afternoon
>>
>>41767907
she probably is autistic as well chill
>>
>>41774389
>chips
>rubbish
>attractive black girl

Must be British, we don't have those things in USA of America.
>>
Whats the difference between being mired and girls hitting on you?

Every time i go out i get some random slut trying to hit on me, and ask for my number.
>>
>>41774487
>one group
Girls never mire though.
>>
>>41774280
rekt lmao
>>
>>41774667
IFFFF IFFF you knew that!!! GO FOR MAKEOUT SHESH QUICK!. She called you the attractive one, therefor just go up to her smirking then proceed to makeout with her.

Has worked for me.

Was invited to chicks bday, saw some chick kiss her, i said "hey wheres my birthday kiss?" then proceeded to makeout with her.

Happened another time, i just madeout with some chick i was flirting with and eye fucking.

IF!!!! she shows interest like saying you're the attractive one, it means balls in your court. Make move or lose.
>>
>>41774710
Australia mate, perth have decent ones.
>>
Idk if this counts but I met a girl on the river a few days ago that was paddle boarding. I chatted her up and helped her load her board onto her car. Later she texted me telling me i made it look really easy. Fucked her saturday night
>>
>>41771271
Its a South Park reference.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6a3BGs1uxfg
>>
>>41766636
http://imgur.com/gFm2h
>>
>>41769261
Now I know, always go in for a hug
>>
>>41773663
found it. it's from myspace. Amanda Wenk.

https://a4-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/130/af1ec528a6b846ab9dd1f84c6a29b88f/300x300.jpg
>>
>>41774830
Yeah I know. I tried to get her away to a more we secluded area but think one of her friends was jelly because he kept coming around cockblocking. It wasn't really a party where making out in the open was going on, had to find a better spot and all the rooms were closed off.

Here's another story
>be at bar with two friends
>cute chick with giant tits comes up to us and looks at me
>"hey, I just wanted to let you know you're the best looking guy here"
>I take her hand and walk to the dance floor
>start making out
>she tells me she wants to go to my place
>get into my car and before I leave the parking space she has my dick in her mouth
>she stops and then few minutes later she pull of her tank tops straps and her tits are out and playing with them
>get back to my place
>get her naked and bang
>she sees a revolution American flag on my wall
>she jokes that i must be a Republican and since I have blond hair and blue eyes a Nazi
>she starts to say that she's Anne Frank and she needs to be punished
>round two end with muh 6 million on her tits
>go to the balcony after so she can smoke
>starts giving me a lap dance
>take her back to my room and bend her over
>one point she looks like she's in pain but she says it just feels too good
>finish
>drive her home

Cont
>>
>>41775242
13 passed you cunt where is the cont?
>>
>>41767891
>I go in for a handshake
ohhh nooooo
>>
>>41775242
Cont
>get back home
>turn on my lights to clean up
>mascara all over my pillowcase
>didn't think anything of it
>next day wash my sheets
>few days later she comes over again
>this time the lights are on while we start messing around
>start to have sex
>not even a minute into it she starts crying
>stop because this is the first time a girls ever cried
>says it happens all the time
>she says it's okay and starts to blow me while still crying a little
>didntknowihadthisfetish
>start to feel bad and tell her to stop
>she comes back and starts crying for the next half hour
>awkwardly just lay next to her silently
>it's all coming together
>the face she made last time
>the mascara all over my pillowcase
>finally she stops and apologises again
>she leaves and I get a text from her
>"I promise I won't cry again"
>never texted back

She defiantly had some sort of issues that were too much for me to try to get involved with but that was some weird good sex
>>
>>41770068
>i gained 30lbs of fucking muscle natty
lol
>>
>>41775242
>>41775413

Wow. You should never tell that story again
>>
>>41775413
When children are exposed to sex (read:raped) they tend to mature sexually more and quicker than normal children
My guess is a childhood rape helped boost her breast size/libido and now shes associating pain/crying to what is supossed to happen during sex since thats how it used to be with her
>>
>>41775741
Well her tits were fake. But as soon as she left I went to my roommate and told him the story. He said he banged a girl who he found out after was molested ad a kid and he said she cried as well and had an uncomfortable facial expression, which this girl had too. Felt bad, about it but I was too awkward then to deal even ask her what was up. Just let her cried.
>>
>>41770413
she doesnt like you just because she works out in the same area as you
>>
>>41772386
Can't tell if she's eyeing you but that's a real cutie. Wish my gym was like that :o)
>>
>>41772386
Btw Mirin the arm veins
>>
>>41774389
Well I've had female friends say that I look cool, my eyes are "really beautiful", and I have a nice butt. But id prefer not to date or fuck friends.
>>
>>41766582

>I don't see any problems here that you can't overcome.

Thats because youre a basement dwelling sperg
>>
File: 1457134087408.gif (2MB, 300x300px) Image search: [Google]
1457134087408.gif
2MB, 300x300px
>>41768661
>Amanda Wank
>>
>>41766740
>make sex with me
>>
>>41770184

kek
>>
>>41770413
You keep looking at heryou fucking creep those are awkward smiles, and she's working out around you because you're in the crossfit section
>>
File: 9242924_t.jpg (12KB, 200x192px) Image search: [Google]
9242924_t.jpg
12KB, 200x192px
>>41771892
i was like.. 'get it!'
>>
>>41772386
you look like a fucking redneck wearing that hat indoors
>>
>>41768355
..sooooo? Did you fuck her?
>>
>>41770442
This happened to me man. It was really rough. But seriously, you jack off too much. You need to not watch porn and not touch your dick for a while.. then you'll be right.
>>
>>41772561
Are you white? Which country?
>>
File: IMG_1017.png (137KB, 750x1334px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_1017.png
137KB, 750x1334px
Feels good but what do I say?
>>
>>41773342

Which is why these stories are posted, for their novelty. If the mires weren't significant why would they be posted?
>>
>>41768686

10/10 boner achieved.
>>
File: Nation.gif (2MB, 330x248px) Image search: [Google]
Nation.gif
2MB, 330x248px
>Grab some eggs to take to work as a snack
>Headed to break room 2 hours into work
>Hot grill my age and fine older woman sitting in there talking about go knows what
>Wearing new outfit that fits much better, feeling confident
>Grab eggs out of fridge
>Look there way and try to give them my best "Sup" nod
>Go to crack egg on rim of counter like usual only this time things go terribly wrong
>I grabbed a regular egg not one of the ones I had hard boiled
>Yolk and clear goo all over my hand and crotch area
>Both start laughing hysterically
>Younger one says "wow anon you must be really strong"
>Older one starts laughing in over drive
>Face turning red, really embarrassed try to think of something, anything to say
>"Gotta eat big to get big"
>Go back to my cubicle covered in egg and shame

For those 15 seconds when I walked in, maybe, just maybe they were mirin...
>>
File: CuaQSToWgAAva7M.jpg (50KB, 720x644px) Image search: [Google]
CuaQSToWgAAva7M.jpg
50KB, 720x644px
>Girl wants to get the squat rack after me
>Says I'm squatting a lot (225).

This may not seem like much to other people, but this is the first time a woman has ever given me a compliment outside my family.
>>
>>41778312
having a safe layer of protection between us is a good idea
>>
>>41766712
>haha don't we all
>bye
>>
>>41773409
stories?
>>
>>41778312
do you like eggs?
>>
>>41769261
>>41775371
i went in for a handshake the first time i met my gf

nevermind the fact she broke up with me
>>
> delivering pizza
>call girl for address
>have voice like sex god, raspy af
>get there call again hear masturbation sounds in phone. hangs up suddenly
>she must've accidently picked up
>she comes down stairs with massive bert stare felt like i was going to hell.
>>
>>41778494
little too autistic to say all that
>>
>>41772386

>she's not mirin you
>but you're big enough that I believe it happens
>>
>delivering pizza
>opens door
>girl is crying, probably one guy related shit
>girl looks at me like im savior
>nothanxjpg
>get call from store that customer complained
>of couse she did
>>
>>41772457
i think when attractive girls are autistic its cute

too bad its not the same for guys
>>
>>41778708
if you are attractive to them it is
>>
>from gym
>pissed off because of whatever
>girl selling shit "omg you are beautiful" runs over
> "how was your weekend"
> me: "found out from doctor i had cancer. Just kidding wtf you want"
>anudda bert stare.
>i walk away
>>
>be 16
>22 yo qt hairdresser cutting my hair
>anon you have to get it washed
>spends 15 minutes carressing my head
>iknowwhatoyourfaggetassistrynadojpg
>my face become cynical because don't want anything to do with her
>charges me for haircut and hair wash
>you think you have autismo ha lol its ruining my life
>>
>>41778764
stop posting ur stories make no sense retard
>>
saw a chubby red head stare at me as I walked past her.

good enough.
>>
there's a qt blonde around my age who works in my department but not the same lab as me and she smiles when we walk by. i want to say saomething but im too much of a bitch
>>
File: NiceOne.jpg (61KB, 1000x800px) Image search: [Google]
NiceOne.jpg
61KB, 1000x800px
>>41778462
you're gonna make it bro
>>
>at the gym today
>old buddies from highschool come in and see me
>GODDAMN ANOM YOUVE GOTTEN FUCKING MASSIVE, LOOK AT THEM ARMS

>Go to Wal-Mart after gym
>see chick from highschool
>oh my god Anon you've gotten... sexy and smacks my ass "We should work together soon" Whatever the fuck that means.
>see her 10 mins later walking past and she feels my chest and grabs my arm
>Feelsgoodman.
>>
Dude from highschool walks passed me in the gym and squeezed my arm and says, "one day ill get there"
>>
File: 1459791326235.jpg (43KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]
1459791326235.jpg
43KB, 500x500px
>>41774605
>>
>>41778985

Did you knock his ass out in your head just like the rest your story?
>>
>>41770916
NOOOOOOOO
>>
>>41770916

>[banjo's playing]
>>
>come back into school from the gym
>wearing tank
>2 girls look at me and say "suns out guns out"
>one of them asks if she can use a picture of me
>say no because i'm 80% they're joking around
Am I autistic?
>>
File: AHAHAH.gif (1MB, 205x223px) Image search: [Google]
AHAHAH.gif
1MB, 205x223px
>>41774280
at the end of the day girls almost exclusively crave ottermode. if you are bigger you'll get guy mires because they can respect the work you've put in but to women you're a roiding freak.
>>
File: image.png (849KB, 1219x717px) Image search: [Google]
image.png
849KB, 1219x717px
>>41778647
>>41778694
>>41778722
>>41778764
Stop.
>>
>>41770200
>6'1" 135 lbs
Lmao m8 you were literally a barbell
>>
I only ever get mired by women i'm not attracted to at all.
>>
File: 1464901209629.jpg (81KB, 419x480px) Image search: [Google]
1464901209629.jpg
81KB, 419x480px
>>41771892
>"goin' for mama bear huh? I saw you guys and I was like '..get it!..'"
>>
>be me at gym
>standing by the dumbells with the 20s in both my hands
>hear Justin Timberlake - Rock your body over the speakers in the gym
>fuck this is my shit
>standing just singing along
>girl comes by
>hey are you still using those 20s?
>told her to piss off
>she walks away in disgust

literally if it was any other fucken song besides rock your body i wouldve gave her them
>>
>>41772386
shes not miring you fucking ugly autist jesus christ
>>
>>41767907
For the best bro. Did you know that if you have sex with a black girl you will turn black? That's how black people happen.
>>
>>41778312
say
>well there's a reason why they call me the baker, because I make a mean creampie
>>
>>41767560
Pshhh easy there bucko, 4 inch arms reporting in, deadlift 1000 lbs for reps
>>
>>41779515

fucking kek
>>
>>41772386
Lol 3 plates
>>
File: tonim.jpg (27KB, 352x550px) Image search: [Google]
tonim.jpg
27KB, 352x550px
>be me 19yo 5'8 better than ottermode thanks to years of judo
>every guy at my work call me either handsome or fuckboy because they think i get shit ton of girls
>3 girls told me i look exactly like toni mahfud whitout blue eyes ( same facial bone structure, beard, eyebrows and especially hair )
>some thicc black girl qt confessed to me yesterday but i declined cuz i dont date black girls
>friends always tell me when someone was miring me

I really wish i was at least 5''11, height doesnt matter if you have a good face and frame, but my dream is to slay and being 6' wouldve made it fucking easier
>>
I lurk a lot and have a little story for you. Recent development.
>Gymcel with a little college and working part time in warehouse
>Ask old high school crush out to pizza, she agrees. Haven't seen her in years.
>Catch up during conversation, she laughs at most of the jokes I make (never used to) and says I look a lot bigger than I used to be, compliments me.
>Leave and go home pumped
Message qt for a while, decide to meet at the gym.
>Show up at gym, a little late
>Work out together, more small talk about things and she watches me work out at some points, she's doing meme exercises mostly
>She get's disappointed when she missed my first set of chin ups
Success? Cont??
>>
>>41780249
R u a homosexual

U tell ur stories like a fucking girl. Stop rambling about nothing and have a proper ending fucktard
>>
>>41780278
Whack off to shemales sometimes. You know, chicks with dicks. Not men with tits. That's gay.
>Take her to local event. She's grabbing my arm and playing with my hair throughout the day. Talks about how she's looking for a real man in her life. Does she want me? Going camping with her this weekend if all goes well.
>>
>>41779175
Yes
>>
File: 1494543756532.jpg (75KB, 960x898px) Image search: [Google]
1494543756532.jpg
75KB, 960x898px
I finally have one, and I hit a double no less.

>just finished workout so I hop in sauna
>See THICC black chick with a bomb set of ass and tits in the hottub
>leave sauna, hop into car and grab my ultra short Zyzz shorts
>Get to talkin' in sauna and she asks for my number
>sends me a couple hearts later that night

Meanwhile...

>Just as black girl is gettin' out of the Jacuzzi, a MILF friend that my mom knows goes into the sauna and greets me.
>get around to talkin', just small talk
>both of us hop out for a break
>comments on my shorts saying they look great on me, must have a strict routine
>asks me about age
>Give her the ol "I'm right about 24 and I'm feelin' it. Gettin' old"
>"Whaaat, that's not old, you'll make people my age feel bad"
>"What you talking about, you're like 30, right?"
>yadayadayada "I work very hard to look young, it's a fulltime job"
>yeah I can see that, if you weren't married I'd be commin' after you
>"since we're being honest I feel the same, but it'd probably be illegal or something with the age difference hahah!"

This got boring to write, anyways she added me on instagram and sent me some hearts and winky faces and wants to coordinate workouts.
>>
>>41767094
Been a long time since a actually someone BTFO
>>
>>41770068
>girl only likes you after you get big
>"we have chemistry"
alright then good luck m8
>>
>>41769117
This has been going on for a whole year
>>
>>41773952
kek
>>
>>41778312
"Give me some eggs and milk and I'll tongue punch your fart box 8-12 X F"
>>
>>41766642

>Mirin in the mirror as i fuck

Fake story aside, I unironically do this.
>>
>>41780371
see>>41780420
>>
File: 4NNmX.gif (176KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]
4NNmX.gif
176KB, 500x375px
>>41780371
>Going camping with her this weekend
>She's grabbing my arm and playing with my hair throughout the day
>Talks about how she's looking for a real man in her life
Bruh, that's your cue to get assertive and fuck the shit out of her.
>>
>>41780371
Having a dick = a man
Don't worry, you're only quite gay
>>
>>41780565
have your (you)
>>
>tfw when you're already established as "the strong one" by everyone you know so people don't mire as often anymore

I need dat dere validation friendos, I still remember people's surprise when I first got big ;_;
>>
>>41773329
>>41774143
>>41777416
Is this what /fit/ has become. Not recognizing popular pastas?

Or am I being reverse baited?

Am I bait?
>>
Nest week on "Things That Never Happened"....
>>
File: Screenshot_82.jpg (32KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]
Screenshot_82.jpg
32KB, 600x600px
>>41769348
JUST
>>
>>41772386
Nice 'stache gains bruh
>>
>reading mirin stories on /fit/
>skip gym
JUST
>>
>>41766636
>no homo
>>
>>41778764
I read this shit over and over like 10 times trying to understand it until I read responses
>>
>>41769280
fucking kys faggot ass degenerate
>>
I enjoy seeing guys look butthurt when looking at me more than girls mirin honestly. Those cuck looking guys with autism anger in their face is just too good, especially since I used to be like that but worked hard to change
>>
Do gays count?
>be cashier
>some fag comes up
>tries very hard to make eye contact, don't give him that
>starts making small talk but I cut him off
>see him biting his lip in the corner of my eye
feelsnotgoodman
>>
retards imagining mirin stories, here's how best mirin story looks:
You walk past someone fine and y'all both look back.
>>
>>41771147
I had a daughter with my first degree cousin. She turned out normal. She's turning 8 next month.
Don't judge me, we were just stupid teenagers back then.
>>
>>41770413
Don't risk it desu senpai sounds like she's just being polite while you staring her down.
>>
>>41772386
That is a fine moustache friend.
>>
>>41766619
>don't know if i should be creeped out or flattered
Are you a woman? No? Be flattered
>>
>>41772386
Miring chest and forearms. Not mirin that back though.
>>
>>41766712
>Needing a workout partner to work a bench
She wouldnt have been able to keep up with you
>>
File: 1496573344833.png (250KB, 740x557px) Image search: [Google]
1496573344833.png
250KB, 740x557px
>>41769348
>>
>eating food in dining hall with friend
>hot as fuck (read: 72 degrees instead of some civilized temperature like 68)
>take shirt off, am solely in tank top continue talking to bro
>notice out the corner of my eye a second bro i haven't seen in about a year
>talking to some girl
>girl eventually leaves
>second bro calls us over
>"hey what's up haven't seen you in a year" etc.
>he mentions the girl he was talking to was about to leave
>then saw me in tank top and said "on second thought i'm gonna go get seconds"
>mfw 185x5 bench body is mireworthy
>she comes back and he wants to introduce her to me
>8/10, has an inch on me, doesn't seem like she gives a shit
>i pick this exact moment to release my entire spaghetti collection
>opportunity has come knocking and i'm still in my underwear
>"i-i'm gonna go finish my food now"
>>
>Be me, jacked king of manlets
>Be this past Saturday
>Be at the gym
>Wife texts me to bring her business cards to her at work when I'm done
>NoProblemLove.jpg
>Swing by the house to grab the cards and make my enormous mass gainer proton shake in a 40oz blender bottle
>Get to her building still in gym clothes, pumped and sweaty
>She runs up to me and hugs me and takes her stuff while all her coworkers stare
>Comes home later and tells me everyone was complimenting how big her husband is
Feels good man
>>
File: lepsad.jpg (133KB, 775x960px) Image search: [Google]
lepsad.jpg
133KB, 775x960px
>new job
>talking to a girl
>seem to be hitting it off
>"yourflyisopenanon"
>to focused on how well this is going and not being a sweaty autist
>"anonyourfly"
>I'm sorry what?
>"your fly is open"
>....ah
>Tip of my dick made a cotton tent through zipper
>I'm not going to make it
>>
>>41782864
at least your penis has wilderness survival skills
>>
>>41781359
I hope you're right dude. Just hard to believe considering I came from skellymode and used to weird her out.
>>
>>41782999

kek
>>
>>41782354
story?
>>
>>41772386
that is the gayest tattoo
>>
>>41782312
life must be hard for a faggot
>>
File: 1490818145634.jpg (23KB, 646x720px) Image search: [Google]
1490818145634.jpg
23KB, 646x720px
>>41768686
Dayum anon
>>
File: 0XN7gKw.gif (878KB, 275x310px) Image search: [Google]
0XN7gKw.gif
878KB, 275x310px
>>41780437
my man. milf hunting is a sport
>>
>>41781910
Meet new people
>>
>>41780157
Im glad im not the only one on /fit/ who knows who toni mahfud is
>>
>>41766582
> Be me
> Be Fat
> Decide to begin lifting
> Have crippling social anxiety due to me being fat
> Does not go to gym because of crippling social anxiety because of being ashamed of my body and not knowing how first day would go
> Stays fat because is fat
> Is resigned


Stay fit boys. Don't become me.
>>
>>41783744
his name is phonetically similar to "don't eat my food"
>>
File: 1496313199201.png (242KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]
1496313199201.png
242KB, 1000x1000px
>very much dyel still (.90/1.25/2/3)
>go to anime con, cosplay has me in tank top
>Randos telling me I look great, buff, cute (;_;), swole, etc. after I take a pic with them
>Gay guy straight up tells me he's attracted to me because I have joocy shoulders apparently. Tries getting me to get back to his room.
>another Tharja cosplayer told me what hotel she was staying at
>am social autismo though

W-what
are normalfag standards really that low
>>
>>41784003
Most normies don't have body dysmorphia, so yes
>>
>>41766712
you gazed into the abyss and walked right past my friend, stay safe.
>>
>>41784003
Do you do a lot of accessories? The reason PPL and PHAT are so awesome for noobs is that the strength gains are slower than something like SS but you get a much more attractive and proportional musculature.
>>
is this the erp general?
>>
>>41783754
FUCK YOU
I'M FAT
I'M AT THE GYM

No one at the gym cares that you're fat.
They care if you let yourself make an excuse not to go.

If you show up on schedule, weighing 400lbs, I'd be fucking proud of you for trying.

Monitor your intake, come to the gym, improve yourself.

If you don't, then you're choosing obesity, and a short, pathetic life - you'd be worse than a cuck.
>>
>>41784003
>are normalfag standards really that low
/fit/'s standards are just high
>>
>>41768686
im diamonds from reading this
>>
>>41780437
You will make it anon
>>
>>41771892
>"goin' for mama bear huh? I saw you guys and I was like '..get it!..'"

what does it even mean
>>
>>41768661
>breast reduction
disgusting
>>
>>41770291
DEUS VULT
Thread posts: 318
Thread images: 56


[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Top | Home]

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/


If you need a post removed click on it's [Report] button and follow the instruction.
DMCA Content Takedown via dmca.com
All images are hosted on imgur.com.
If you like this website please support us by donating with Bitcoins at 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties.
Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site.
This means that RandomArchive shows their content, archived.
If you need information for a Poster - contact them.