>That guy who ragdolls after his squats

>That guy who noclips into women's shower

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>>41542780
>guy despawns after failed bench pr
>respawns inside of a barbell

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>>41542780

>That guy who wears basketball shorts to the gym

>>41542780
this is me. because i give everything to my squats and diddlies

>>41543385
yes this, how do i lift my feet after squats

>>41542780
Whats rag dolling?

>the guy who offers to duplicate my gym bag but takes it and disconnects from the gym

>>41543632
>That guy who offers to trim my plates for free but then disconnects with them
tfw I didn't have enough coins to rent more from the pl8 dispenser

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>That guy that uses a 32-bit routine and gets an integer overflow on his gains

>>41543632
lmao

>That guy who uses impulse 101 to get more pl8s

>that guy who catches fire on stairmaster

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>Gym admin sets gravity to -1
>Skellys now acting like chads benching 600kg

>>41543380
>basketball shorts to the gym
ME!
Also, why would you give a fuck about what other people wear?

>>41544704
Pls leave this website. I'm asking nicely.

>That guy who turns on god mode

>>41544691
>-1
Would that be the same except everything is upside down and on the ceiling and if you leave the gym you fall into space?

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>>41544819
>the guy that deadlifts himself
>can't control direction and flys off into space
This is why you always add at least a 5lbs weight to the bar, and never do just the bar. Seen too many good men have to suffer from all the Venusian women that want their cock.

>that guy who spawns piles of cheese and sweet rolls and leaves them everywhere

Pick up after your gains, asshole

>>41544736
>Pls leave this website. I'm asking nicely.
I will, but! Please elaborate on the basketball shorts fetish you have.

>That guy who changed the vending machine product models to pizzas

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>>41543380
>That guy having S I P S between sets

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>that guy who used god mode before lifting

>that guy who no clipped out of the manlet pit

>that guy who starts quote with capital letter

Guess it's summer already

>>41543380
Whats wrong with this?

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>he paces around the barbell during resting periods
wot a n00b m8

>>41545042
>basketball shorts
>while not playing basketball
Might as well come to gym in a tuxedo

>>41545065
>that guy who didn't bring his lifting tuxedo

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>that guy who stares into nothingness in between sets

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>>41545065
What the fuck do you wear?! Gym pants?!

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>>41545065
You don't fucking wear a tux?! Holy fuck, I beat you just look at your phone while lifting and wear headphones.
>he doesn't practice his piano skills between sets
Never gonna fucking back it, anon.

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>>41543632
>>41543773
>that guy with 99 strength that has a barbell with lmao2pl8 fall out of the sky, then proceeds to snatch it

>>41545139
>some fag in gym shorts walks into the gym
>laugh at him as he sets up his squat rack
>he fucking one-shots me with his obsidian maul
Fucking SS fags not even once

>>41545074
kek

>>41544954
>that guy who puts a bucket on my head and then steals my protein shakes

Two shy too do anything about it :(

>>41544767
it's never worth it, last guy got nailed to some wood

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>lost connection mid set

>that guy who wears his power wrist to lift

>queue up for lift
>get auto-filled to support
>spend 1.5hrs spotting everyone in the gym
>DYEL goes to snapcity and flames me for it
>TFW he was warming up with 225

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>>41542780
>that girl who is a total vapid roastie whore

>guy benching 3pl but with IDDQD

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>tfw in the middle of 1 rep squat max and Connection Lost: 28.6 seconds until Auto disconnect...

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>lifting new PR
>gains goblin DDOS gym server
>Attempt to reload cache
>end up crashing
>Hackers exploit firewall breach
>Outdated software allows hackers to exploit a security flaw
>now I have to pay 50£ to get my gains back

Should I switch to an apple gym or should I start a home linux gym? Can't keep up with this windows bullshit

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>Go for squat 1rm PR
>WTF so easy, do it 5 times
>Realize I'm DC
>Reconnect, all 5 squats hit me at once
>Crowned Emperor of SnapCity

>>41544704
Bit chilly for the start of summer

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>that guy who goes to the toilet in the middle of his workout

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>>41546337
Use a VPN faggot, then use a proxy and hack THEIR gains.

>>41546341
TOP KEK

>>41542780
>missed double xp weekend.
>gym rivals all curl more than me now.
Try-hards I swear.

>>41546000
>got permabanned for the 3rd time today
FUCK
gotta find a new gym again

>>41544819
No you cotton headed retard. Benching 600kg at -1 newtons would be like rowing 60kgs at normal gravity. Normal gravity is at 9.8 newtons now go back to the brainlet course at your gym

>>41546337
>should I start a home linux gym
i think you mean GAINS/Linux

>>41547950
Xex

>>41542780
>That guy who fails to load textures as soon as he enters the gym

>>41545094
Athletic shorts are not the same as basketball shorts

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>that guy who breathes between every rep

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>go to gym
>kicked out immediately after I step inside
>gym owner updated the squat racks without telling me
>have to go download the update before I can go inside
>gym is already full by the time I get back

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>that guy who rubberbands during his deadlifts and does 15 reps by mistake

>>41545165
>that guy who does 10 hours of cardio a day for a year straight just to use a shortcut that saves him 5 minutes of walking

>that girl who is streaming her workout on twitch

>>41545332
Underrated kek

>>41543632
>>41543773

>that guy who caps his OHP max at 1 plate and only trains bench so he can 1 shot well rounded lifters with the same total

>>41547681
What is F=ma? When will the brainlets learn force is not the same as acceleration?

>>41548307
>that guy who stops leveling at 19 but has his higher level gym buddies give him better barbells and pl8s so he can dominate shitty lifters in the Warsong Gym

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>tfw managed to hide a drone in the women's shower

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>>41542780
>tfw gymadmin sets friction to 0
>tfw can't grip the bar
>tfw I pull out my back and accelerate into the ceiling creating a black hole

>>41545139
>that guy who deadlifts 400kg but fumbles around the bar for 5 minutes before he can grasp it
Fucking pures man

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>>41545065
>mfw lifting tuxedo is at the tailors on chest day

>>41545107
>not mastering Mozart between DL sets
Confirmed Skelly DYEL

>>41544415
>We get it
>You're in IT

>>41548421
>And he's going to make IT
[spoiler]we all are[/spoiler]

>go to locker room to change from squat shorts to ohp shorts
>accidentally brought my wrist curl shorts instead

fuuuuuuck

>tfw making good noob gains but all the high totaling lifters are waiting in the gym parking lot so all the new lifters have to make a mad dash to their vehicles and hope they aren't the unlucky ones to get their gains ganked

>>41545094
What kind of exercises do I have to do to get a face like this?

>get banned from gym for ninjalooting gains from my manlet party members
>have to lift on my shitty alt with 1pl8 PR deadlifts
should I just boost back up to where I was?

>>41546043
>tfw that woman is your friends mum

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>>41542780
>ragdolls

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>Lifting partner boots me from party just as I was before I finish last rep
>Can't loot any gains

>finally reach 1/2/3/4
>get hacked and my password is changed

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>spend a month grinding to 3 pl8 diddly
>some dipshit buys a 4 pl8 diddly from a Chinese lift farmer for $4.99
>calls me a noob in the locker room
>mfw

>want to squat
>pl8s still updating

>type give item_trenvial
>type sv_infinite_aux_power 1
>get banned cause gym server is vac secured

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>mfw trying to farm squats exp on a quiet server and noobs start connecting and curl in the squat racks

whats wrong with you people

>>41549627

>that guy who gets /votekicked

>>41549220
it's your own fault, that's the kind of thing an idiot would put on his luggage

>>41549599
Batou has seen better days

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>homegym master race
>just bought a power rack
>no longer need to call my wife's son for help
>mfw it's online only
should I just buy a gym membership?

>>41544964
It's just a meme bro

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>>41542803

>get bored and set life to legendary mode
>respawn as autistic manlet

>>41548249
UNDERRATED

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>Benching
>Shitty connection, packets drop
>Bar clips through hands and smashes face

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>finally was the last one to top off the sweat can

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>that guy who pulled off the squat rack glitch and skipped straight from skelly to swole

>>41544691
>that one dude who was in the middle of a set of power cleans and is now in LEO

>>41548379
Underrated

>>41542780
>That guy who R1, R2, L1, R2, L, D, R, U, L, D, D, L's in the gym and kills everyone

>been lifting for years now
>have accumulated a lot of gains
>get admired for it, people recognize me at gym
>someone found gains dupe exploit
>my physique is now average as fuck
>everyone is as big as me or bigger with no effort
>mfw some of them turn into dyels instantly because their gains got rolled back

all is well in the end
thanks admins

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>gymdevs decide to rebalance everything inside the gym
>Squats don't just burn calories, they also burn whatever is in your lower intestine too.
>DYELs are given their own lifting area, they can stay as long as they like.
>Minature squat racks for your fingers
>Some of the long-timers are getting pissed about this change.
>Others who are new dive right in and fuck everything up.
>TFW the gym has been in development hell for the past 8 years now.
>TFW you are no longer the target customer.

>that guy who made a "fitness" website where he makes up bullshit articles about things he is not well informed about and constantly argues with people in the comments section who call him out on his bullshit
nattyornot.com

>>41551012
>tfw my gym is still in beta
It's just an excuse for them to not have a curl rack. They keep promising to release one in the next update, but I think they've taken our money and abandoned us. Don't kickstart gyms.

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>>41547950
>>41546337

>>41542780
Spy, what are you doing my man?
Don't you have gayshit "form-checking" videos to post on youtube?

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>That guy who has a completely dark skin and almost looks invisible at night

>MFW he turns out the lights in the showers

>Manlet is hogging squat rack
>Carefully staying out of his aggro, sneak up and grab his gym bag
>Put it in one of the high cubbies
>Run out of his aggro
>He's now stuck walking back and forth directly below his bag because there's no way for him to reach it but it's still in his sight
>Enjoy my squat rack

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>fell for the early access gym meme

>they promised everything, even ash trays in the squat racks

>6 months in and they haven't even patched in the manlet pit

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> that guy who kept spamming weaknesspays and kept going up 10kg on his squats

>Preparing to do some bench with gymbro
>He missteps and his foot sinks into a plate that was on the ground
>He ragdolls, then starts violently convulsing as if being pulled by a black hole
>Suddenly shoots 20 feet into the air
>Ragdolls on the way down
>Gets up like nothing ever happened
>Walks back over and repeats his stock dialogue
>mfw Bethesda gyms

>>41551072
>ash trays in the squat racks

kekerino

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>admins finally caught the gym speedrunner abusing a deadlift exploit and sent him to snap city
about time too, guy was using all my plates

>>41551092

>Bethesda gym

Iktf

>gym receptionist accidentally killed by bandits
>non essential
>gym goers just standing blank faced at the door all day
>need to pick very hard lock to get in
>guards immediately arrest me for picking the lock and have to spend a few days in jail before I lift again

Ofc I got a strength penalty for serving my time.

>>41551163
It's a hard world man
>Walk over to dumbbell rack
>My hand brushing against a dumbbell a certain way inexplicably sends it flying across the room
>Hits some guy
>He aggros and starts attacking me
>When I back away, I bump into another gym goer which inexplicably causes them damage
>Entire gym aggros and attacks me
>Make my way to the gym guard so I can pay my fine
>He attacks me too
>Allow myself to be slowly beaten to death because fighting back would result in more fines

>>41551163
>>41551092

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KU5fXUx4N4
a bethesda gym would suit the autists of /fit/

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>>41551092

>hitting the punching bag
>qt walks by, turn to look at her ass
>stray punch hits her
>suddenly whole gym fighting eachother based on who likes me or her
>need to walk over a sea of corpses every time I lift now

>that guy who kept shouting "LIGHTWEIGHT BABY" through his shitty mic.

Thank god he went too heavy and disconnected.

>>41550777
Top pip

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>new patch finally released
>gym bullys given yet another unnecessary buff
>roasties' aggro range increased even further
>gains goblins placement completely fucked, just drag and dropped in massive mobs
>various main story questlines still broken, literally impossible to advance past dyel
Convince me not to uninstall.

>tfw gym is p2w
>Chad just comes with his trustfund every time the gym resets and buys all the gains

>>41551221
Doesn't the NPC ragdolls despawn after a while?

>>41551191
>Goodbye
>You too
Uh y-yeah, how autistic...

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>that guy who wave dashes on the treadmill

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>Finish squat set
>Didn't cough up 7.99$ for the deadlift DLC

>be me
>doing squats
>finish my first set no problem
>rest
>start my second set
>halfway through my basketball shorts lose their last point of durability
>they were +12 STR so i lose the bonus
>legs instantly crumble
>barbell comes crashing down on the pins making a loud noise
>everyone turns to look
>quickly wrap my hoodie around my waist to conceal my lack of pants
>go to the gym blacksmith
>he wants 25 silver to repair my pants
>mfw i used my last 5 silver for the plate dispenser

just fucking end me lads

>>41551363
KEKed

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>That guy that turns on debug mode and sets his STR to 99
>never see him in the gym again

>>41546519
>reverse hacked by door
>at least my legs are OK

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>gets stuck under the bar
>turn on noclip
>try to go a bit forward to get out but fly through gym roof instead
>break atmosphere

Holy shit I love this thread.

>when your gym bans you for asking someone if they were finishing up with the curl rack, but you were technically in a party and devs recently banned ganking

Fucking Korean gyms trying to appeal to a wider audience. Filthy casuals.

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>>41549703

>stacey is being the center of attention by doing retard dumbbell "squats" just to show off her ass
>I walk in with my phat and steal all her attention
>tfw stacey is seething in the corner because I stole her limelight
>tfw I'm the new gym celeb
>tfw people always pm me asking for gains

>go to gym
>devs hasn't patched the manlet pit so it's full and I can't enter
>workout will have -15%xp
>fuck it, workout either way
>go to squatrack
>bar is to high up
>stacies and chads laugh
>run out and loose money I spent on pl8 dispenser
Fucking devs that can't even fix the manlet pit

>>41544415
Should have gone long

>that guy who only lifts once per day to use his "fist lift of the day" bonus

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>>41551870
>he doesn't change the time to a new day everytime he lifts
Never gonna make it

>want to squat
>swarm of manlets spawn in the squatrack
>go into sneak mode
>i throw dumbbells at them
>they run around the gym searching for me
>99 sneak
>they will never find me
>sneak to squat rack
>stab the manlet guard from behind
>loot him
>gauntlets of superstrength
>squat 5x100 20pl8s
>master of the liftoverse
>archivement unlocked

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>>41542780
>double gains week
>subscription ran out and can't afford to renew yet

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>some fucking curlbro paladin need rolls on purple leg gains
>I was lifting the most wps the whole session
>he wins the gains
NEVER using lfg (looking for gym) again

>gym alchemist is out of strength potions
>my int is too low to craft them myself

>tfw gains become square and pixelated after joining an indie gym

>that guy who bunnyhops on the treadmill

>cant use squat rack without aggroing gym golem
I wasted my estus for THIS?

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>>41542780
>forgot to log out of the free weights area
>some jackass reset all my rep counters on the dumbbells and set my entrance music to One Direction
At least I had 2-factor authentication on my diddly PRs so those are safe

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>>41551382
>gym jester messed with the npc_behaviour.ini again

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> MFW I've finally achieved a 4/3/2/1 and I realized it should have been routine 1/2/3/4...

>tfw chad has a dragon lore barbell but I only got a worm god

remember that old easter egg where you rerack the dumbells in a particular order and it causes the staceys to switch to their nude/topless skins?

tried this as a joke in a gym in NZ but it turns out they didn't have the patch and they had to spend the whole day cleaning up manlet spooge. Almost lost my international gym pass for that one

>>41547681
>gravity is at 9.8 newtons
Ahah wtf

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>accidentally prestiged back to lvl 1
>gotta squat the bar and eat a metric fuckton of oats again

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>>41542803

>finish workout at Los Santos gym
>Finally maxed out muscle bar
>Walk to exit marker
>Spawn outside
>Walk to my blista compact
>"Cheat activated"
>All the cars in the parking lot explode
>Dead npcs everywhere
>my blista exploded
>Try to walk home
>Somebody using a cop skin beats me to death with a dildo
>Respawn and lose all my progress
Time to find a new gym

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>that guy who reracks the weights after every rep

>>41543324
Them moonrunes don't seem right

>>41548249
not cool dude lol

Bump for the boys

>>41547681
9.8 m/s^2 you tard

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>tfw -5 from STR to add +5 to INT

>that guy who lags on OHP
>because of latency issues

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>that guy who used console commands to spawn himself a gf

Was me. I've finally made it bros.

>>41551416

kek

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>Season ends just before i get 3 plate squat
>Place back down at 270 next season

jesus fuck

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>been working at local gym for two weeks now
>gymgoer came in today wearing a full suit of armor wielding a huge broadsword
>asks me to let him into the gym for free several times in rapid succession
>what the fuck
>grabs an amulet out of his bag and slip its over his head
>suddenly have an overwhelming urge to let him in to the gym for free
>as I say yes, floating text appears in front of me
>speech increased to 35
>weird but okay

Fast forward 2 hours

>guy comes back out of the gym
>his gym bag is much emptier-looking than it was when he walked in
>get suspicious
>decide to check locker-room
>checking the lockers one by one until I come across the one our guy used
>mfw I see literally thousands of objects crammed into this tiny 30cm cubed locker
>mind is bending
>at least one hundred cheese wheels
>several caches of ancient medieval weaponry
>glowing lovecraftian artifacts
>at least 10 heavy animal skins
>about 500 different assorted potions
>have no idea how it is even physically possible for this many items to fit in such a small space
>shut the locker in disbelief and walk back to my desk
>never see the guy again

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>Doing pistol squats
>Gym rep turns on exploding rounds

>working out in pvp gym
>people are pussies, so it's always empty
>just curling in 2 squat rack
>some server hopping asshole comes in and casts gain steal on me
>he lag switches and disconnects
I'm fucking tired of fucking f2p gyms overcrowding. Membership costs too much. It might be worth it if it increased gains by 20%, but you don't get shit. The only thing I could use are the tier 4 crossfit shoes, but I'm not a normie fag.

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>that first sip of the day

BREHS

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>That guy who forgets tokens for the plates dispenser

>Doing cardio on the empty side of the gym, nobody really comes over here and it's not very well kept, don't think much of it
>Some other guy shows up and starts watching me for a while
>That's weird, but whatever
>Right as I leave the treadmill he dashes over to me as quickly as possible
>Before I can even turn my prayer on he AGS rushes me and specs me out with gmaul
>Respawn at home, lost all of my gym lobsters

Why do people do this

>hit 5pl8 dl yesterday
>finally unlocked the Chad skin
What am I in for lads?

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>>41556656
>drinking /sips/
Stay pleb. I'm leaving humanity behind.

>>41556914
don't use that skin, everyone will expect more out of you

>be a hot chick running on a treadmill
>people always shouting "buying gf"
>guys are flexing their ceps, trying to impress me
>they don't know I'm really a guy

>>41556956
>only usable in the manlet pit
>have to use prayer points to prevent your legs getting stolen, so you have to bring another kind of sip anyway

Not even worth it.

>>41556980
>when you forget to bring your rock cake to the gym

>Busy day at gym
>Disconnect modem power cable

l o a t h s o m e

>>41552024
>hit a PR and won a free gym crate
>opened it to get a hyperbeast curl bar
>curl bros keep begging me to sell it

Probably gonna wait for it's price to go up and trade it for a bunch of Front side Misty dumbbells.

>that guy who wastes Berserk during squats and then rests 10 min in between sets waiting for the CD to Berserk again on deadlifts

>>41551425
>bought the deadlift/ohp dlc combo
>turns out gym doesn't even have an ohp rack
>get votekicked for ohp'ing in the curl rack

>>41542780
>that guy who wipes off his cum on the bench

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>That guy who wedges himself in a corner running backwards for two months so he can slingshot himself into the parallel women's lockerroom

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>that guy who overclocks the gym equipment

>>41548863
Genetic exercises

>>41549057
lmao

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>>41546341
Fucking kek

>>41557621
kek!

>>41546453
If you don't need to shit you aren't squating hard enough

>>41548293
This must have happened already.

>>41543632
i lost 7 replies in.. lmao

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>Gym party defeats Final set Boss
>Some asshole rolls need on chest gains
>tfw all I get is shoulder gains

>that guy who connects to the wrong gym server constantly lags out mid squat and dies

>>41561103
wtf, her boobs are flappy

>>41545040

>That guy who gives a shit

>>41561189
still hit tho

/fit/ pls help I'm actually being serious so no bully
anyways, I'm 5'8 and 150 pounds and just had 3 protein scoops in my shake it was 72 grams of protein. I feel weird now, am I gonna get sick?

>>41561245
please /fit/ am I gonna be okay?

>>41561235
You'd hit even a dog

>>41544704
There's always at least one.

>>41548863
Squats.

>Heavy bench day
>samefag so I can spot myself
>it doesn't work and I die

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>gains server down again
>stuck as skinnyfat till it's fixed

>>41548863
suck dick to work on your jawceps and chindominals

>cooking level only 70
>cant make 5 scoop shakes yet

I Just want to GET big

>>41549343
best in thread desu

>>41561252
stomach cancer

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>roll a nat 16 of d20 for a strength check and easily do 5 reps of 5pl8
>rest for bit for my next set
>rolls another d20 and get a nat 20
>fuck yeah.tomeofarcaneknowledge
>dl that 5pl8 like it's 1pl8 ezpz
>being getting nice rolls for last 2 sets
>roll another d20 for my next lift
>a fucking nat 1
>tfw touched the bar and I suddenly get lascerations on my shins and hands, shit all over my trousers of dexterity, lumbar is disintegrated, shoulders dislocated, biceps are torn to shreds
>tfw elf stacy was watching with her half-orc chad boyfriend and his party of human, elf, dragonborn

>gym keeps on disconnecting from the cloud
>internet provider is called up
>best wait 5-7 working days

JUST

>>41561252
Drink water

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>That guy who didn't crack his gym membership right and had all his joints dislocated at once by the antipirate system

>>41543632
>That guy who hasn't done dragon slayer
>LMAO1runeplatebody

>>41551092
>kek

>eat oats and preworkout
>meet party at gym
>chad says we are strong enough to superset multiple lifts at once
>he supersets squats, deadlifts, and bench before I even equip my belt
>fail on last rep, lost my well fed and experience buffs
>forgot protein bar for rebuffs
>can't continue because well fed buff gave me stam regen and I keep running out while spotting
>we can't finish, no one got any gains
>chad clubkicks me
>spend the next few weeks spotting for randoms while chad's group recruits stacy and they get multiple gym-firsts

>making great gains with gym bro
>accidentally supply block myself
>head to gym hive to spawn more overlords
>friend continues to lift while I'm gone
>make conversation while they're hatching, ask him how he is lifting with such low supply
>tfw he typed Food for thought into gym pc when he checked in

>we're no longer friends

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This thread is nostalgic as fuck

>>41557741
Best post

>wait patiently for single gym squatting rack to become unoccupied
>finally my t-t-tur-tur-turn
>hl2.exe has stopped responding

fuck my gains

>that guy who camps by the bench press
>keep getting shot at every time i try to bench

>>41556914
an absolutely massive charisma bonus.

>>41544704
lurk mor

>>41551967
do you even quest bro?
go to the fighters guild hall in low town and join
free complimentary strength potion for new members

>>41544415
this is why you shouldn't roid

>>41544704
well it's almost as bad as wearing fedora and trenchcoat unironically

>That guy who instalocks to the power cage when it's set at a chest high level.

this thread is so fucking cringey. literally 16 year old 'gamer' tier humor

>>41567230
>Feels the need to comment on light hearted sperg humour on a Malaysian Yodelling and Child Modelling forum.

>Put up more weight than Chad
>SmugPepe.2011
[Chad] has started vote to kick: [Anon]
>TFW all the Stacies vote yes
>Kicked from gym for 3 days

>>41542780
>that guy who lift with the physgun / gravitygun

>>41551092
>>41551163
>finally download the Ironborn DLC
>fast travel to powerlifting gym
>weird assholes in stringers show up and attack everyone
>outside receptionist is killed and there's no way to use the outdoor racks or supp shop
>have to go on some dumb quest in California to kill Jeff Seid so his faggot fanboys stop attacking my gyms