mirin' thread

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>at uni studying all morning
>qt keeps looking over at me
>make eye contact a couple times
>start packing up my stuff to go to lunch
>she starts packing up too
>get up and put on my jacket to leave
>she comes to my table and plugs her laptop into the only remaining power outlet
>tfw thought she was mirin she just wanted to charge the entire time

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Snapped a photo of this guy last week I was mirin'

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>>41401017

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>>41401092
>start to wear shit that actually fits me towards the middle of my cut
>female co-workers notice and compliment and feel me, when I started here I was fat af, turned into a Skelly with a gut, then I started lifting
>autismus Maximus kicks in and I just say t-thanks? or say I'm still small and fat

>>41401130
Oops, but yes just a copy paste from an autism thread

>be semi-fit and 6'6"
>go to the grocery store, some new cashier is working
>blonde, hair braided, blue eyes, freckles
>solid 8/10
>notices me when i start putting my stuff on the checkout
>visibly blushes and smiles like crazy
>say hello
>she starts giggling and says "wow, youre really tall!"
>Laugh and say "So ive been told"
>stares at me the whole time when i pack my groceries
>smiles beautifully and says goodbye
>turn around when im leaving and see that shes still staring
>smile at her and she smiles back

Nothing special but made my day

>>41401017
Why did you take a picture of him?

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This happened this last weekend

>Used to be fat as fatass, but lifted all through college (Graduated last year)
>Go back to hometown over the weekend
>Go to grocery store to pick up stuff for barbecue
>Run into qt from high school. Haven't seen her in like 5 years
>Her eyes light up, "WOW, anon! You look great". Proceeds to say this a few more times throughout our conversation.
>She pulls out her phone, puts hers in my hand, and then takes mine (which was slightly sticking out of my pocket). We trade numbers.
>She texts me later that day. I ignore it because fit has turned me into a jaded misogynist.

t-thanks guys

>>41401164
because this body is my goal

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>>41400987
Isn't that Major Lilywhite?

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>front squatting 1pl8 in empty gym cuz injured knee
>skinny gay dude appears behind me out of nowhere
>"im jealous of your legs"
>me too thanks

>>41401017
>>41401209
he looks like a manlet

>>41401017
The guy posted himself that pic a month ago.

>>41401146
This would be life changing for me

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>>41401187
This is where the real gains are made

>5'7 black manlet so will never get mired no matter how 'big' i get

fuck this cursed life

who obvious here?
>spend all day with co-worker
>grab food at mall
>spend hours at park just talking
>get in car to take her back home
>ask her if she wants to come over
>"And do what?"
>"Idk watch some netflix"
>get home
>she asks where the bathroom is
>comes back 5mins later with her hair up
>sits next to me on coach
>I put on Oldboy
>sex scene starts
>"I wonder what it feels like for girl to lose her virginity"
>ignore her
>"I heard it hurts, and you can like bleed"
>ignore her
>"Like if the cock is really big it will hurt and feel good at the same time"
>"I wonder if you can feel the guy cumming inside you"
>tell her to stop talking I'm trying to watch the movie
>calls her friend on speaker
>friend starts talking about how I better use a condom etc
>give up and take her home

and my virginity still intact, her's isn't

>>41401146
>being mired because of height
you count this as sort of achievement?
>inb4 "you are triggered manlet"

>>41401017
T H I C C
H
I
C
C

>>41401476
Honestly didn't really enjoy the movie. Hadn't heard of the original though. Still shouldn't have been a bitch talking during a movie christ woman

>>41401500
>you count this as sort of achievement?

Of course not, since you dont have to do anything to be tall. But this was a mirin thread, not an achievement thread. Mires because of height feel good regardless since its seen as a positive trait.

Also, you are a triggered manlet.

>>41401476
Which one the shitty Hollywood one or the original?

>>41401500
>mirin' is about achievement
chad eats pizzas and gets mired by stacy while you cut calories and jerk off to fat chicks

>>41401578
original

>>41401578

Asking the important questions.

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I am one of the hungriest skelly's but i get mirins from just my face alone. I want to get into lifting to optimise and become a 9/10.

>>41401612
Good man but why ask her to stop talking? You can always smash and rewatch it again

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>>41401017
kek. I've seen that photo before MONTHS ago
>last week
which means it's actually you boosting your own ego
nice try

>>41401246
how did you know hes gay

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>>41401895
This is what he looked like.

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>>41401808
Post face right now
> niggas wanna talk big and got no balls to prove it

>>41401187
only tru way to make it

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>be dyel with like 12" arms
>do SL for ~8 months
>one day get to 300x5 squat
>last rep is grindy as fuck, going up really slow but I make it
>hear "woah good shit" from behind me
>ripped as fuark gymbro taps me on the shoulder while I'm resting
>"you got a pretty serious squat now, nice job"
>shoot the shit for 10 minutes
>made my first friend at the gym
>introduces me to his other bros
>squat/diddly with them now whenever I see them there
>except benching because they all do 2pl8+ and I'm stuck at sub 1.5pl8

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>>41402574
Good job dude

>>41401841
because I said we were gonna watch a movie so I figured that's all she wanted to do

>>41401017
He should go see a doctor about those leg tumors

>>41401476
>and my virginity still intact, her's isn't

Sounds like you got the better end of the deal.

>>41401187
>She texts me later that day. I ignore it because fit has turned me into a jaded misogynist.
no youre just a faggot, if not go nut in her mouth.

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>>41402574
Congrats lad, you're on your way to making it

>>41401895
he did not say 'nohomo'

>>41402574
Good job man

>>41403231
actually I ended up cucking myself

She had this guy friend she knew since they were children, obvious that he was crazy about her, he was just too scared to make a move but he was a really nice guy. Started convincing her to date him and make the first move, and eventually she did and now they've been together for over a year. If you love something you must learn to let it go etc.

>>41403508
kek.
underrated

>>41403625
People like that guy NEED the "one true love happy ending" meme. Without it, 50% chance they turn into a resentful blubbering sack of shit that burdens everyone around them.

You did a solid favor to him and the rest of society helping him get with his "one and only".

kudos, anon.

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>>41403625
Thank you for being that person, that was really selfless of you you should be proud of yourself

>>41401017
That's you, let me see them glutes bb

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>>41400987
>go to gym at busy hour
>realise I packed my Best Shirt
>shirt is basically silk thin, show off every single muscle
>start workout with bench, chest and arms pumped up in no time
>mostpeoplehereareabout40.png
>go to free weights, get going there
>look down at the weights, remain focused
>first time I look up, mid Guts set
>9/10 stacy with body of the same rating looking right at me in the mirror
>she quickly looks away and starts blushing
>smirk and continue my workout

She was there with her boyfriend, or I would have done absolutely nothing

>>41401246
He was envious, not jealous. Jealousy implies your legs were going to be taken away from him. He sounds like a retard.

>>41401451
bahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaa

>>41402574
I don't get this I've been going to the gym since December and my bench is already 2pl8+ do you guys not do OHP and weighted dips?

>onnatrain last night, hauling some weights in my backpack because I'm slowly moving my home gym
>this dude, looks around 50, is listening to Led Zeppelin on a good quality speaker, smiling all the way
>if it wasn't music I liked it would have been annoying, but he kept it on the quieter side and it was enjoyable
>set backpack down with a satisfying thump and take off my jacket
>comment positively on the choice of music and have a conversation with oldguy
>after a while he just looks me over and says that I look pretty muscular, asks if I do lots of sports, climbing or mountaineering
>feelsgood, first mire I ever got aside from gf
>proceed to shoot the shit about backpacking, turns out he's a veteran of some of the scariest and most dangerous alpine routes that I've ever seen
>guy lugs around 20kg backpacks like it's nothing
>looks at mine and asks what was inside to make it thump so hard
>about 30kg in plates and assorted shit
>he goes wide-eyed qnd compliments me for not collapsing under it

It was special, I won't lie

>Work in "Behavioral Health" unit at hospital aka the psyche ward
>constantly be told by patients and visitors alike, "whoa, they definitely need big guys like you up there."
>occasional qt3.14 patients on unit results in occasional qt3.14 stalkers IRL
>they're crazy as all shit with daddy issues, cutting, suicide attempts, and/or drug use
>still fuck the occasional former patient despite all logic against it

Feels good man

>>41404158
As a former mental/behavioral health worker myself, I just want to say you're a fucking piece of shit for getting off on 13-14 year old mires and fucking former patients.

It's unethical and shameful.

>>41404101
what a cool fucking guy

>>41404278
Completely agree. Turns out he was actually over 62, which makes him even cooler for doing what he does.

>>41404258

Cry more, faggot. I don't work pediatrics. 18+ here

>>41400987
>gf introduces me to her coworkers
>one of them gets flustered when talking in front of me

>>41401017
>my mum took this picture for me

We haven't forgotten, gaycunt.

>>41404328
>over 62
weird barrier desu

>>41404258
I can maybe understand why getting off on mires from 13-14 year olds is bad, but what's wrong with fucking former patients? They are former patients after all. As long as 18+ who cares?

>>41404498
Meant to say over 60, then remembered he told me he was 62 and wrote half of each statement because of some bullshit some linguistics professor has a name for.

>>41400987

>gettin mired by sexy nignogs

hngggggg

>>41401584
boy oh boy I do love jerking it to fatties tho whewwwwww lad

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>>41404537
heh i do that all the time

>>41404588
iktfb

>Back at hometown gym for summer
>It's normally just full of old people but this time there's an extremely attractive girl there
>At the end of the night it's just me and her in the main room
>Do some cable curls, basically ego lifting before gym closes because I finished a minute early
>Arms look stupid pumped
>Catch her miring
>She does a quick eyebrow raise and smile thing, then looks away
>Don't know what to do at this point so I just leave without saying anything

>>41401528
Really? I thought the original was fun and stylish. It's a good date/hangout movie now that I think about it, it's not too complicated or artsy but it not being in English is a light pleb filter for the girl.

>>41404556
OP ones look 30+ years old

Though I do remember some decent-looking black girls hitting on the emo/scene guys in high school, even the ugly/skelly ones. Always thought that was weird but other people have said they've seen it happen too at their schools.

>>41401005
ur retarded, she was literally waiting for you to talk to her autist.

>>41403862

kek

>>41404736
Are you the retard?

>>41404258
Moral fagging on here... Go back to tumblr

The other day some MILF I was ringing up (cashier) said "you look like an actor... can't remember his name." I said thanks and she said "Ohh yeah, he was cute." Then she left. Not sure if it was flirting or what. That's my blog have a good one.

>>41401476
why did you invite her back to your if you didn't want to smash?
story sounds fishy

>>41404608
How would people go about chatting up at the gym? I have always wondered this, what's the next step after your glances meet?

>>41403862
>She was there with her boyfriend, or I would have done absolutely nothing
god, I hate when that happens

>>41405013
Just find an excuse to start a conversation and make it look as natural as possible. It's not rocket science, even if it feels like it.

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>>41401476
what the fuck yo

>>41404556
You and your dogs will hang from the same tree.

>>41401476
Man, I aspire to be like you.

>>41400987
>thats all you need to get mired by females
>lift for a year, don't worry too much about squats and numbers
>cut til you can start to see your abs

It's really that easy, but you need to not be ugly, nice height and good bone structure.

>lunch break at work
>go to bakery because loads of work I want to finish
>one of the ladies says "we have fresh salads now if you want one!"
>other lady says "Look at him, we don't have enough salads to feed this one!"
>first lady flexes her bicep at me
>Th-th- you t-too

>>41401187
I want to be like you, honestly

>>41401451
You forgot ugly. Because I'm literally 5'7" black manlet and I get mires.

>>41405007
we were just 2 co-workers hanging out. It seems obvious NOW that she wouldn't have came over if she didn't want to but that's 2yrs too late

>>41401017
Stop being a faggot and show up your butt if you're gonna fish for compliments

>>41401858
>dat fuzz

I caught a girl looking at me today, she looked embarrassed and looked away when I caught her.


I'll interpret it as a mire anyway, otherwise the only people that have said anything are family members I haven't seen for a while

>jesus christ anon, your arms are so big

Thanks mom.

That's about it

>>41401224
yes it is

I haven't been in public much recently but my mom is mirin' harder than ever. Mirin' my skin, mirin' gains etc. Does this mean I'm ready for real life girls?

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Bros, I need some advice:

>Meet qt British girl on Tinder in January
>Get along well, have some dates
>Try to kiss her once
>Reject my kiss, tells me she's not sure how she feels about me
>ohboyherewego.jpg
>Remain good friends ever since (cooks for me, we watch Netflix, we go to the beach together, etc.)
>About a month ago, texts me she dreamed that we kissed
>Tell her I will kiss her in real life
>Next time we see, I try to kiss her
>She gets all flustered, telling me that she's not sure anymore, that she shouldn't have told me about the dream
>I tell her: "If you dreamed that I kissed you, it can only mean that you want to kiss me. So we are going to kiss"
>Proceed to make out for a while, then she says we cannot kiss anymore.
>Thisshitagain.jpg
>All things continued as normal
>Yesterday, we were watching Netflix and I put some used gum on the table.
>She accidentally touches it
>I banter: "Kek, you touched my saliva"
>She replies: "Well, as a I matter of fact I have already TASTED your saliva"
>"Oh yeah, you mean our kiss. I had totally forgotten about it"
>She gets angry: "WTF!!"
>Keep watching Netflix
>I ask for a gummy bear from the bag she's eating
>She gets one and LICKS it
>"Now have some of my saliva"
>I proceed to eat it. Say nothing.

Is it me or was this something quite sexual? Should I keep trying to make out with her? I'm super confused.

>lady friend and I decide to take it to the next level
>decide we are going to fuck
>word get's out
>former oneitis finds out
>yells at me crying because she likes me
>news to me, dump lady friend
>me and oneitis happy with eachother

Then I wake up.

Not much of a mirin story, but it wouldn't happen if I wasn't smexy anyways right? Tren dreams are nuts

>>41405558
Holy mother fucking beta what?

Dude, serious advice, move on, this girl is wasting your time. Try one more time, if you don't fuck her, move on

>>41405584
this. kiss her again with intent of taking it further, if she flakes again then tell her you're done with her wasting your time and you're sorry but you can't wait any more

>>41401187

> what is makin it

>>41405584
>>41405601
T-thanks. We are actually spending the weekend together at a cabin by the lake. I will go all-in on her.

>>41404405
this

>>41405630
Ohhhh boy. Good luck man. Could be a real awkward situation if it goes south lol

>>41401584
Carl doesn't care anymore and eats pizza, visits hookers and cries himself to sleep

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>>41405558
>>I banter: "Kek, you touched my saliva"

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>>41405558
>qt
>british

>>41405558
She sounds like a test, some giving her attention beyond a friend

>>41405630
don't do this. stop talking to her immediately. women like this are in it for the games. shes wasting your fucking time and if on the off chance you do fuck her she'll pull the same "i'm not sure about this bullshit" until she wastes a year of your life.

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>>41403862
>She was there with her boyfriend, or I would have done absolutely nothing

iktfb

it's fun to pretend, though.

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>>41401187
well played.

>>41404101
Wholesome mires

>>41404258
>>41404354
>>41404527
>>41404929
I think I figured it out. This guy doesnt get
>qt3.14
And thinks you are getting mires from 3, 14 y.o's


I am really proud of myself for figuring that out.

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>>41402481
Is...is this a real tweet? Is it satire, or was he legitimately acting like he was gonna beat up Nazis? He looks like 5'4" at most.

>>41404258
Nothing like a good nut

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>>41405558
>>41405630
>grade school tier flirting
>entertaining this chick any further

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>>41406364
>mfw I realize you're right

newfag btfo

>>41402574
Same

>>41405558
bro are you trying to fuck a 12 year old, because that shit is childish

>>41405558
Hey brah, some girls like take things really slow. Maybe she was sexually assaulted at a young age. Maybe she was raised to believe that premarital sexual relations like kissing is a no no. Slowly you'll mold her into your cock sleeve, but you need to play her games right. At that gummy bear moment, you should've gotten rapey and made out with her

>>41403625
Damn, dude. You're pretty awesome for that.

>>41401187

It's okay to be gay as long as you're a misogynist.

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>walking dog
>shirt off because starting to feel like summer
>girl sitting on her porch stares at me with her jaw dropped
>swiftly avoid her gaze and stare into the distance because autism
M-made it.

>>41402560
true shit

>>41403625
sometimes its ok to be gay :)

>>41405558
Ignore other anons; she wants the pipe.

This is how you get a fwb. She's probably kinky as fuck too.

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>Visiting family in europe
>In some catalog shop where you look through a magazine and they pull stuff out of the back.
>With parents
>Girl at the desk is acting normal for the customers infront of us.
>Get to desk
>Girls spagetti falls out HARD, she can't even talk normally.
>Her co-worker comes over takes over.
>"You were too cute for her" she smirks.
>We leave.
>Dad says "I knew the ladies were in to you, but god damn".

I miss you dad.

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>>41407992

Came here to feel, not that way though...

>>41400987
>when I first came to /fit/ OP pic looked huge
>now he looks dyel

> pass girl on campus
> she looks at me .75 seconds longer than the usual strangers eye contact should last
> I smile
> she smiles

Was a very small mire, but felt good

>>41401476
>obvious

>>41401187
>Phone sticking out of your pocket.
Were you rocking jeggings there bro?

>Hot PT smirked at me as we walked by each other at the gym today

D-Did I make it?

>>41405960
KEK AS FUCK

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>Walking from weightroom through cardio area to get to water fountain
>9/10 cardio bunny gym crush is walking towards me
>Get nervous and focus on staring straight ahead
>Normally we would just pass eachother by, but this time I can feel her looking at me
>Muster up the courage to look back at her
>She smiles at me, I'm trying really fucking hard not to autistically break eye contact
>I smile back
>She says "hi" really loudly cause we're both wearing headphones
>I'm focusing so hard on smiling and maintaining eye contact that I forget to say anything back
>Walk past her and realize that I fucked up

Is this what making it feels like /fit/? Do I have to pretend to not be autistic now? I thought I was still in DYEL mode.

>>41401451
We're all gonna make it, breh. Black, white, it doesn't matter. Bruce Lee was your height, breh. Don't you wanna be a sick cunt like Bruce?

>>41401451
Go Lucio mode and fuck comiccon chicks

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>>41402976

>>41406365
its a right wing satire page taking the piss out of the swole left by sharing a literal female to male tranny quarter squatting with a pussy pad in the smith machine.

good talking to you

>>41405558
why are you still trying with this one, anon? you've kissed once, holy fuck if you haven't at LEAST kissed the girl on the first date then you're fucking up big time

>>41408594

Fucking this.

>tfw roadhog teir, in a bad way

>>41401187

>ugly in HS
>Get /fit/ in college
>turn down pussy because youve grown to hate succubi

You and I both brother. You and I both.

>>41408844
Kinda the same here.

>be skinny, but T-Rex mode because I played soccer all my life
>after 18 yrs old, get fat, be fat for 9 years
>at 27 decide to get fit for real
>28 now
>get mires everywhere
>WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU WHEN I WAS FAT? I'M STILL THE SAME FUCKING GUY. EVEN FAT GIRLS IGNORED MY ADVANCES BACK THEN

I can't get with a girl any more because my blood boils the moment a qt girl tries to flirt with me. I hold my autism back 24/7 in public.

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>5'9, 19 yo, 66kg
>9/10 face, get mired everywhere

I'm Toni Mahfud tier, people say I'd look just like him if I connected beard and had blue eyes (exact same bone structure).
I add girls i meet on snapchat but I post my face only once every 2 weeks, and when I do they start flirting and say they miss me. Funny how 2 years of puberty can change someone's bone structure so much, or maybe I just lost some face fat.

>>41401187
>She pulls out her phone, puts hers in my hand, and then takes mine
>letting a fucking woman physically dominate you
yep gonna be an autist forever

>>41408889
Nothing wrong with that.

Where the fuck are the sex robots? We were promised sex robots by now.

>>41401476
This is beyond alpha. This is what I aspire to.

>>41408542
Just tell her you think she's hot and were trying to intimidate her. And ask if it worked.

>>41408542
Just initiate and say hi to her next time you see her.

>>41400987
>be at gym today, doing pull day
>on deadlifts, not impressive weight like lmao1.5
>dude and his gf come in on their leg day while im resting
>start doing last set and can see dudes gf looking at me in mirror
>i move on to do lat pulldowns or something
>shes on the ab machine and kept looking back at me
>her and bf leave, i assumed they were done
>im doing face pulls and they return
>bf seems shitty, drops water bottle on floor and starts doing rope pushdowns on the circuit machine next to me
>teaching girlfriend how to do it
>i move on to my curls and can still see her watching me in the mirror
>make weird eye contact a couple times
>can see her bf doing face pulls on his knees at double the weight i was doing as hard as he could
>shes still looking over at me
>i leave and can see both of them watching me >make eye contact with boyfriend, cant read his expression

Not really much of a story, but it's all I have other than general street mires from grills etc

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>>41406364
lmao mathlet detected >>41404258

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>>41405630
>We are actually spending the weekend together at a cabin by the lake. I will go all-in on her.

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>>41408878
>where were you when i was fat
>im still the same guy

you dummy

>>41400987
Tfw that dude looked jacked 3 yrs ago

>>41408878

But if you're still the same guy doesn't that mean your blood boiled when a qt was trying to talk to you back while you were fat?

>>41401187
This happened to me twice but i didnt make an asshat out of myself and still replied

>>41404958
T. Hanks

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>>41408542
damn that would be a sweet hat to have

>>41409127
stop

>>41408646
He's obviously not serious, he just has a small dick that makes him embarrassed

>>41405558
That was when you were supposed to go in for the kiss, anon.

" Have some of my saliva...." That's a very obvious way of telling you she wants to make-out.

And you could have went further from there too. Once your lips have access to a girl you should be able to get her horny in no time by kissing her neck / ears etc ....

Try it next time.

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>>41408844

Read that again and tell me how your statement makes any sense.

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>>41409696
>implying he's not rationalizing why he can't get a woman instead of just manning up and facing the fact that he's a coward

new here, eh kiddo?

>>41403689

> they turn into a resentful blubbering sack of shit that burdens everyone around them

/r9k/ in a nutshell

>>41402560
Who are you quoting?

>>41405558
Both of you are around 18. This shit is just childish af

>>41409715

My reply was meant for >>41408878

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>>41405559
>>word get's out
>Oh, haven't you heard? Anon and Anonnette will bang at the night of the full moon!
wtf anon

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>Doing my practicum at a middle school
>Walking to the lunch room, heading to the snack machine to pick up something
>Hey, sir my friend wants to pinch your ass

What makes JC's so damn thirsty?

>>41407992
A R G O S

>>41408959
they werent mirin btw

>>41409818
Barack Obama

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>>41400987
some fag complimented me the other day. Been such a long dry spell I actually thought about it...

>>41408018
This

>>41408878
>got fit for real in 1 year

>>41409818

fuck off you turdmuncher

How do I break my forever mirin?

I was on my way working out almost 5 times a week and then I just stopped.

I need someone to beat the shit out of me.

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>>41401017

>>41408878
>WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU WHEN I WAS FAT? I'M STILL THE SAME FUCKING GUY. EVEN FAT GIRLS IGNORED MY ADVANCES BACK THEN
You're the same guy but now also attractive. Nobody is obligated to fuck a fat loser, stop being autistic

Nobody in my gym uses the power rack, so I do my entire workout inside it, I also bench there because I can use the safeties to avoid killing myself.

>>41404008
Manlet detected

>>41400987
>be me
>fat though middle school
>growth spurt + dieting
>skinny fat through hs
>self conscious af
>a year or two after hs start lifting
>be somewhere in between skinny fat and dyel, so basically filled out a bit with my noob gains
>have jaw line
>hansome_squidward.jpg
>go to quick check at 3 am to buy some sips
>qt from hs I had a crush on forever cashiering
>she put on a little weight so she went from an 8 to a 6
>there's mirrors everywhere so I can see she's mirin hard
>mentally I'm still a self conscious fatty but I play it cool
>"wow anon, you look great"
>"thanks, been hitting the gym pretty hard"
>end up smashing in the bathroom
>tells me not to nut inside her
>do it anyway
>she's pissed but gives me her number anyways
>fuck a few more times after that for about a month
>get bored since I was legitimately better looking than her
>disappear into the night and never talk to her again

>>41410972

Just don't forget to say "no homo" after you bust a fat nut in his boipucci

>>41405558
wtf are you like 14?

>>41411197
Nice

>>41407761
>Slowly you'll mold her into your cock sleeve
>you need to play her games right
>You should've gotten rapey and made out with her

What the actual fuck is this shit tier advice?

>>41404258
GTFO newfag

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ended up having my highschool crush mirin' at me out at a club

ended up fucking

was hollow and so unrewarding

i don't know how to feel brehs

>>41411197
9 months later...

>>41407992
Holy shit thats a good mire lol
Post a pic?

>be "the big guy" at my job (restaraunt/bar)
>always joke that I'm the bouncer (suburbs, need bouncing maybe 1/10,000)
>don't tell them that 5'10 and 215lbs wouldn't last 2 seconds
>late one night
>enraged (at least 300lb) hippo
-y football-loving man throwing glasses at bartender
>"oh shit get the Big Guy"
>probably should've mentioned the whole "I know you're normies , but srs guys I'm small" talk before this

>>41411197
>DENNIS
I hope you have a kid

>>41408880

pls post face anon

>>41400987

Uhh used to work out for a few months and had people noticing, feeling my muscles, etc. Some drunk girl at a party once was feeling my muscles and started lifting my shirt to see if I had abs, but I had to pull my shirt down because I didn't actually have abs.

People 'mirin like that actually didn't do anything for me though. My self esteem wasn't lifted, it was actually kind of demotivating, since I felt like I didn't deserve any of those compliments having only worked out for a few months. It's hard to explain, but maybe I'm just a weird fuck.

>be friends with an Amazon girl in high school
>she's hot but never had interest in dating her, just get along with her really well
>5 years later we still hang out but I start lifting
>go to the gym with her one day
>she keeps touching my arms and telling me how buff I've gotten
>a month later she's sucking my dick
>fucked her once
>could again but have gf now
Really boosted my confidence. Especially since im 5'9" and shes 6'

>>41403625

>If you love something you must learn to let it go etc.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

* BREATHES *

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

>>41403862

If she mires you and she is there with her boyfriend then that boyfriend is now automatically your gym nemesis for this session. And all is fair w.r.t battling your gym nemesis.

this is 101 stuff. Have you not been memorising gym rulebook?

>>41401164
>Why did you take a picture of him?
Can't you read? He was mirin'him.

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>>41413016

>>41404405
Holy shit I remember this now, kek

>>41408959
Anon looks at a girl 50 times during his work out and catches her looking back, little does he know she's just thinking
> I wonder if thay autistic fucking creep is still watching us work out?

>>41405630

I recommend you learn how to go hot/cold on her.

Atm she likes you but thinks so is above you.

You just need to stop caring about her, stop reciprocating so much. When she texts you only reply 66% of the time. Write shorter messages. Give other girls attention in front of her.

Explicitly tell her you aren't together and are just friends. Friendzone HER. Then she will fight

Then you need to avoid long make out sessions as those actually kill sexual tension. Kiss a little. But be the first to pull away. This will drive her crazy.

Once youve driven her kind of crazy by soft rejecting her a lot and push/pulling you can kiss and start fingering her, and she will allow it. If she doesnt then hold back and go cold and say "whew i was overcome with passion there. We cant be a thing, we are too good of friends" and stop kissing and put TV on.

Trust me mate Ive been with 70 girls in my time and I was a skinny beta for most of those but I always had great game. THAT is how you have sex with her this weekend.

>>41408959
thinks a girl was mirin deadlifting 1.5 plate XD

>>41405559

Im always amazed by how beta people can still be while on steroids

>>41410004

dude im in fucking tears thats the funniest thing Ive read in a month for some reason.

>>41401187
You've finally made it anon

>>41405960
CARA IS CUTE!

>>41413087
Not Dennis but it's been long enough that I would have heard if something happened

>>41408959

You had cum stains on your shirt

>>41409818
You

>>41403625

that isn't being a cuck, that is being an all time number 1 bro.

The short term joy that could have been a fling with her, a fling you could have with any other chick, is nothing compared to the long term personal validation and joy that dude feels

there will be other girls for you, there probably wouldn't ever have been for him

>>41413016
kek, I know this feel. Im 6'0, my mom is 5'4 and she always brags to her friends about how tall is her son. My mom friends who havent seen me yet probably thinks that I'm some 6'6 basketball player

>>41408878
>>WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU WHEN I WAS FAT? I'M STILL THE SAME FUCKING GUY. EVEN FAT GIRLS IGNORED MY ADVANCES BACK THEN
This! FUCKING THIS!!!

I´ll never be able to get a girl to ´mire me, but even if, I´d ignore her. These girls didn´t care for me when I was an weird little spastic who everybody detested, so why would I want their attention now?
Getting gainz and winning at stock trading is better than sex, desu. Fuck them all to hell.

>>41404008
i dont do dips because i like my sternum to remain intact

>>41408878
>>41413803

>Where were you when I was a fat loser?

What is wrong with you people. You're complaining that by all accounts people didn't give a shit about you when you were losers?

The autism is out of control.

>>41404158
Don't do that man its asking for trouble

>>41413803

>These girls didn´t care for me when I was an weird little spastic who everybody detested
>weird little spastic who everybody detested
>who everybody detested

Soooo they didn't care about you when no one cared about you?

What are you complaining about.

Sounds like you are s till a weird spastic.

Trust me these girls won't give a fuck about you if they could talk to you for 5 minutes. Good body or not.

>>41403689
>>41403777
>>41407805
>>41413767

Fuck all that shit. Who cares about that other guy? Was he even your boy? What is this, reddit? I guarantee they will break up sometime, because he will make her the center of his life. There is no such thing as "the one", or "true love". Are you guys 12 year old girls? Become men or get the fuck off my /fit/.

Even if he was your friend, you probably should have fucked her, just to teach him a lesson about life.

>>41413334
For real. Fucking hilarious. And these cucks are congratulating him.

>>41414364
Learn compassion

>>41413803
Are you fucking retarded or something? Why would a girl be interested in a fat antisocial loser? No shit girls will be interested if you get in shape and learn to talk to people. You have fucking issues bro
>hurr fuck people for being attracted to attractive people

>>41414384
>>41414337
>>41414307
I think we got baited

>>41414423

Those type of people actually exist, especially on this board. Doubt we got baited.

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>>41414364

>>41404958
prob wallace shawn

>>41409140
t. cuck

>>41411393
>confidence reassurance
>confidence reassurance
>retrospective plan of action
where u lost?

>>41413218
Height don't matter when she's on her hands and knees, ayyyyyy

>>41414444
QUAAAAAADS

>>41413549
This man knows how it works.

>be 6'1
>guy who's 7'0 walks into the gym
>grils still mirin me

lanklets when will they ever learn

>>41415191
Is it possible to just be attractive enough to not have to do any of that BS?

>>41414986
Yes it does. I'm a manlet (5'5") and I hooked up with a girl around 5'9". She wanted to go doggystyle but my legs were to fucking stumpy to be able to stay on my knees and stick it in.

I ended up in squat position, which tired me out hella quick. I could tell she was disappoimted when I kept struggling like a child to fuck her pucci.

>>41415216
If you're assertive that will overcome most other things

>>41400987
M80s I'm looking for the Tyler Durden greentext.
It goes like:

>want to look like Tyler Durden, what do?
>two thousand and twelve, charging people **** for gym membership, costanza dot jpg
......
>Do you even lift, mfw dat gyno.


Pls respond

>>41415209

>>41415274
Maybe she was embarrassed she was attempting intercourse with a dude couldn't hold a fucking squat even to get some "pucci".

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>finally get a date with qt
>meet her at coffeeshop
>she looks so fucking beautiful
>sun dress
>even put makeup on which she never does
>talk for a couple hours
>date ends
>she leaves
>didn't even touch her

she looked so fucking perfect but I'm fucking incapable of showing affection why did my mom lock me in the house for my whole childhood HOW DO I FLIRT I'M FUCKING SICK OF BEING ALONE

>>41400987
> recently at my middle aged uncles's birthday party
> his second wife who is my age (26) notices my gains
> "wow nephew you've been working hard"
> Blush and rush
> Latter that evening I went to the get a drink to his kitchen
> Horny step aunt follows and gropes my butt
> I freak out and go with it
> mfw my uncle is my main source of income
> mfw when I always fantasized about banging her on the kitchen counter

what do senpai??

>>41415693

Its too late for you, hope you enjoy dying alone

>>41415694

Fuck her and get another source of income fucking moron

>>41415693
ALWAYS kiss on first date

>>41415693

Read up on kino escalation.

>>41401451
>>>/pol/

>>41415747
fucking HOW
i try over and over but I fucking can't
how do show affection??
I'm crazy about her but i don't know how to show her it's like there's a fucking wall stopping me from telling her how beautiful she looks touching her would be like slapping my own mother across the face


WHAT DO I DO HOW DO I FUCKING KISS why can't i be normal

>>41415882
Read up on body language, nigga.
In an actual book, not online.

> Hanging out with mom, go grocery shopping
> Get back to the car
> "So did you see those two girls?"
> Literally wut?
> "There were these two girls totally checking you out while you were in line, you really didn't notice them?"

Has this ever happened to anyone ever?

>>41415882
When I was 17 and I went on a date with this girl, when it got to the end of the date I was really nervous cause, like you, i had no idea what to do.
What I did, and I don't think I've really tried it since, but what I did was I hugged her goodbye as one does/should do.
But at the end of the hug (when we were separating but not separated), I lingered a bit and looked her in the eyes and after a moment slightly dipped my head forwards. This worked at the time

It's relatively autism-proof

>>41415694
u better not be lying on the internet, nigga

>>41415999
Yeah it's happened to me with my mom before. We were sitting in a restaurant facing eachother and I had my back turned to the entrance. Two girls walked past and I thought nothing of it, but my mom pointed out that they both blatantly looked me up and down. Was kinda weird desu, what am I supposed to do start hitting on them with my mom sitting there?

>>41415928
I know all that shit trust me
I know she likes me I can see the way she looks at me, how she txts me, how she talks to me, how she wanted to be around me everyday in class throughout the whole semester
I can see her looking at me out of the corner of my eye, I could tell how much time she put into making her self look nice for a fucking coffee date

I just do not know how, and I am physically incapable of, showing affection. I can't even kiss my own mother on the cheek. The simple act of reaching out and holding hands with a girl is foreign to me.
>>41416030
like this is completely impossible for me. I've got no problem holding eye contact, but I could never bring myself doing something like this.

I feel like it would be an insult to lean in like that. To get in her space, to pressure her.

>>41411517
welcome to the real world, baby. wait for the existencial crisis to kick in every now and then.

>>41413638
how do you think biology works, exactly?

>>41415323
I had just done legs that day, but yeah, probably lol. It's not like I give a hoot. I came in her then said goodbye to her husband and stole his milk as I left.

>>41416129
>I am physically incapable of, showing affection
Ah, it appears we are the same person.
;_;

>>41404556
>nignogs
>sexy

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>>41407992
Rest in peace mirin' dad

>>41415882
Start with a hug maybe anon?
If the hug is reciprocated and lasts for 5-10 go for the kiss bro

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>>41408439
I'm 6' 136 skelly and one of the qt PTs always smiles and says hey anon when she walks past me even though I've never told her my name so idk man

>>41415693

Was this a tinder date?

>>41416129
Don't look at a kiss as a sign of affection, look at it like a handshake with your mouth

>>41416801
Sharia can't happen soon enough desu

>>41416840
Ahmed pls

>>41416840
>tfw you realise sharia law was literally only invented to stop Chad from hitting on all the hot girls and taking their virgnities
is there a more cucked region?

>>41416884
Christniaty
>somebody raped your wife and daughter and killed your son?
>forgive them! don't let anger and revenge destroy you!

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>>41416840
this

>>41416905
What ? You know that it is God that forgives them, not the christians ?

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>>41416921
For fucks sake
Is there ANYTHING modernity hasn't corrupted?

>>41416113
I wish I was lying Ive fapped 6 times today and I still want to hit that.

>>41401017
>implying ur mom didnt take it
>implying she doesnt think you wear too small shorts
Maybe your gf as well dont remember, stil mirin though

>>41404008
its harder for taller peeps to get big numbers on bench btw. you must be a manlet

>>41417799
>get handed the genetic lottery
>still find something to nitpick
Lanklet genocide when?

>>41402574
>reaching 300x5 after 8 months on linear progression
sweet jesus dude wtf

>>41401500
manlet is le triggered

>>41405167
how tall are you?
this will never happen to me i'm a fucking manlet

>>41416129
>>41416129
you're putting the pussy on a pedestal you weirdo. stop that. she's just like you

>>41404258
upboat!

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tfw cuttin n jaw comming along nicely
tfw was in bulk mode now looking athletic
tfw gettin mires
tfw gettin approached more
tfw no social development
tfw getting away with it cause lookin fit


lmao

>>41417844
Not him, is that bad?

>12 years old
>new neighbors
>son is a bully
>constantly tries to punch/kick me in the junk
>afraid to leave my house sometimes
>no one listens
>16 years later
>begin to get fit and work out
>start meeting people and attempt to become a normie
>1 year later, now 29
>be a ripped normie
>his mom is single and always smiles when she sees me
>Whenever I work out in the backyard she always shows up, even work out inside for a few days and notice shes not out there. Work out outside again and she shows up every time
>it's almost summer and insanely hot in south carolina, they have underground pool
>shes now showing up in a bikini
>today she asked me if I'd like a swim since I'm sweating like mad
Should I?

Shes not hot, and I know it'd probably devastate him(he still loves his mom and he still picks on me(verbally)), I try to be a good person. . . but at the same time. . .

>>41418442
no reason not to. i had a chance to bang the single milf next door, but i was only 15 and didn't have the balls to do it. Now at 23, she moved a few years back when i left for college, still in touch on fb, gonna find her and pound her out if she's still game. spoiler, she got married 3 years ago, but that pussy has reservations

>>41418555
I'd never fuck a taken, let alone married woman. One side of me is all for revenge and justice, getting payback on the motherfucker(i guess thats pot calling kettle black) for how he treated/treats me, on the other side.. I could be the better person.

>>41408889
the stretch for you to be able to call someone an autist resembles that of Michael Air 'GOAT' Jeffery Jordan in space jam (1996)

>>41418612
>your neighbor isn't taken
>isn't married
EZ puss is ez puss, it'll be a fun memory to look back on.
Currently banging a qt neighborhood friend i've known for 10 years as fwb. Calling a neighbor over to fuck is a unique novelty you should experience

>>41418658
I dont think you understand. He doesn't want to because she isn't attractive and it'd fuck up her son.

>lifting for 6 months
>first warm day of the year
>first opportunity to wear a pullover instead of winter jacket
>take streetcar
>look out of the window and avoid eye contact with other passengers like usual
>stand up to get out at the next station
>12 year old girl checks me out and gives me lewd smile
>I audibly gasp
>I look away quickly and get out
>other passenger snorts

t-thanks little girl I guess

>>41415323
>
>>41415274
squatting over a bitch and pounding hard doggy feels good for the chick btw.

Also if you're too short in doggy style you pull her legs further apart and then she will be lower. Magic***

>>41402481

This 'guy' is FtM tranny.

>>41401451
Isn't kali short as fuck? Cause he looks it and gets mires... from other men on chuck basher videos

>>41418770
i get stared at by 12-14 year old girls 10x more often than i get even glanced at by 18-24 year old women

WHY

>>41404101
Well

Did you let Daddy fuck you?

>>41418770
>>41418988
>doesn't like an Xtra tight coochy
why are you complaining? girls > women

>>41419023
because im 28 years old and id rather not go to prison for fucking PRIME TEEN PUSSY

>>41419023
I am too autistic to play the cool grown-up, also I don't want to go to jail.

>>41414575
Kek

>>41419104
>>41419116
>doesn't exploit nowadays society
>hasn't already changed his official birthday on his ID
Transageism is a real thing if you say otherwise you're just chronophobic.
You just have to claim that your 16 year old self is stuck in this current body.

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>>41419201

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>>41419278
It is real. A lot of refugees are know to be transage or at least agefluid.
Fortunately Sweden has acknowledged this mental state and accepted them as who they feel like they really are.
C'mon it's current year.

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yesterday drinking with some friends at friend's gf's house. Friend's gf has her grillfrens round, one of them constantly eyeing me up. Later on she buys me a drink at the pub and running jump hugs me.

I-I made it, right guys? hehah...

>>41400987
>working at shit retail electronics job
>been lifting for a year but on a perma-cut since I started (290 with no willpower)
>still a little fat but have what I think is an ok face
>random girl comes in and asks for a tape recorder
>she wasn't exactly hot but she was a p.cute thicc girl
>give her my normal customer service spiel about electronics I have no idea about
>have a short, random conversation, totally forgot what we even talked about to be honest
>she walks out but her sister comes back in and gives me her number

that was the first time I got some girls number without even trying

>>41408542
Mate smiling back was 'hi' enough, don't sweat it.

You gotta be sympathetic to yourself, everyone spergs in minor ways like that

>>41408878
>>WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU WHEN I WAS FAT? I'M STILL THE SAME FUCKING GUY.

Lol buddy, face the fact: people want attractive partners. When you were fat you weren't attractive.

There's nothing wrong with anyone wanting an attractive partner, so why are you getting angry at people for it?

>at party
>fight breaks out
>me and 3 others try to stop it
>after 10mins we finally manage to stop it
>host is my friend and his gf
>later when we all sit down and start drinking again she approaches me around 3 times
>anon thank you so much for helping!!
>squeezes my arm obviously looking for a flex

D-do i have a shot?

>>41416119
It happens to me all the time cause I hang out with my mom a lot.

>>41410830
A R G O S
R
G
O
S

>>41401451
I'm a 5'4" asian and I only get mires from middle aged soft gay dudes

>>41401476
>bitch wont shut up
>bitch wont wait until the movie is over

You Alpha as fuck.

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Got my first mire today;
>Diet and lift for 6 months, minor gains but I lost wight
>Be at club, 16+ event (i know, but we wanted to go out and celebrata a friends birthday)
>Standing by the bar
>Group of girls ask us if we can order their drinks (we're 19, they were under 18) and I do
>Later that night one of the grabs me and says they wanted to thank me
>Apparently they were trying to set me up with one of them who thought I was cute
>Declined because I wasn't attracted, said I had a GF (I wish)
Still felt good

>>41413549
What this guy said is 100% right, however there is more than one way to skin a cat.

My preferred method is to go on the aggressive and after that I'll play to the reactions she gives. As long as you're confident and she replies to at least the first thing you said you're golden as far as conversation. After that I'll start molding myself to fit her and her personality and slowly become the person she feels like she needs at that point in time. What she doesn't know is that the second I win I'm going to leave.
It takes tons of practice to do this though because you have to learn how to find out what a girl says from what she doesn't say. The most important things to know about a girl are the things she doesn't say. Like if she has a bf and you tell her to suck your dick and she says you're horrible, she didn't tell you to stop. It means you shouldn't be as aggressive about it but you should keep pushing it from different angles.

>>41419011
Why are you like this?

>REAL STories


been lifting since 2003. bigger than the hulk. still Virgin


or lift constantly still get ignore due to my head.

>>41416129
It may sound retarded, but the most fool proof way of bagging her is to sum up all your feelings for her in one short sentence, practice saying it once so you don't forget the words, and look her in her eyes and say it at the end of your date. Avoid going too fruity with the language, making it seem like you're creepishly devoted, and definitely don't use the word love and her panties will get soaked.

>>41418389
no, that's amazing

>>41420251
If kg that's incredible. If pounds then good but not amazing.

>>41405558
god almighty

>>41413803
go on tinder right now. you see that overweight fat girl? did you swipe right or reject her? you rejected right? guess what? they're doing the same to you IRL for the very same reason. PEOPLE DON'T LIKE HAVING SEX WITH FAT PEOPLE. if you gave a formerly fat girl a chance now that she's skinny, wouldn't you want the same for yourself? christ you're an asshole. people are shallow and are attracted to what they are attracted to, get over it.

File: 1493659873105.jpg (58KB, 960x717px) Image search: [Google]

58KB, 960x717px

This happened today and I smiled.
>Go study with friends for finals in college cafeteria
>Finish doing a back and biceps workout
>I finally get there
>See tropical QT with dark skin Booty with the crew
>We study and share banter with one another
>Girl was shy the entire study session.
>Thought the worse and she hated me
>Today I went to eat out with friend
>Friend tells me she was miring hard as shit, and I was oblivious to it
>He shows me a text in where she says I'm handsome and wants to get to know me
It's very small but I've never had any good luck with girls.And this is the confidence boost I need.

>>41415693
Wtf its so easy, tease her a lil bit give a compliment or two, offer to walk her home, take her hand and when ur about to seperate hug her tell her you had a really good time and go 4 it
>inb4 cringe

>>41416129
Not gonna make it

>>41418442
>1 year later, now 29
>he still picks on me(verbally))
you're 29 and you still allow someone to bully you? you also have a chance to cuck your bully yet you do nothing? if this is real then kys you beta faggot

>>41420159
You didn't answer my question.

>>41418555
>i had a chance to bang the single milf next door, but i was only 15 and didn't have the balls to do it
how will you ever recover

>>41419496
Nice man