> tfw banned from the local gym due to multiple women reports

What did you do to get reported so many times?

what did you do creep?

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>Banned from gym for dropping the weights

You can just say that and not elaborate.
Although, typically normal well adjusted human being don't he get banned

>>41338385
greentext faggot

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>walked into gym
>head to the freeweights
>see qt latina fit girl in yoga pants
>beautiful ass
>walk up and approach her
>pretend i need the machine shes using so i have an excuse to break the ice
>'hi, how many sets do you have left?'
>'just 2'
>stare in her eyes
>silence
>'i like your yoga pants'
>o no why did i say that so loud
>'.....thanks'
>'i just gonna be honest youve got a really nice dumper'
>silence
>people are looking
>she turns all red and storms off
>i get on the machine shes usin without wiping it off
>do 4 sets of shoulder press with a hardon in my sweatpants

Cant go back

>>41338395
>>41338401
I tried talking to women there and that is pretty much it. Like "Hey, are you working out?" I thought that would be funny because we are already in the gym. Sometimes I tried to make a tip on how they should do exercises and when I tried to continue the dialog they responded rude and annoyed.

>>41338461
this happened.

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>>41338475
>I thought that would be funny

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>>41338475
how tall are you?

>>41338492
5'7", why?

>>41338492
5'1", why?

>>41338492
>>41338506
they never learn

>>41338492
4'8", why?

>>41338506
>>41338511
kek

>>41338492
3'2", why?

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

>>41338492
2'4", why?

>>41338475
>hey, are you working out?
why else would they be at the fucking gym you retard
god damn, if you're autistic then just keep to yourself
dont try to chat up random strangers if you're a social retard

>>41338492
I am 5'11. I think it has more to do with my face. Also one of the reports was for staring at girl's ass for like 10 minutes while I was on a treadmill and then she just came to me and kindly asked to not look at her ass. That was pretty embarrasing.

>>41338385
>>41338475
Its a fucking gym not a bar, leave people alone you creepy fuck

>>41338547
That literally was the point of the joke.

>>41338385
he was wearing little tiny shoerts with no underwear and doing dragon flags on a bench by dumbbells while listeninf to retarded dubstep garbage music in his beats headphones so loud that it you could hear ot. over the retarded dubstep thqt plays over the gym speakers

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>>41338475
>Like "Hey, are you working out?" I thought that would be funny because we are already in the gym.

>>41338475
>"Hey, are you working out?"

>>41338598
i go to thr gym to meet women

>>41338406
planet fitness?

>>41338461
rule 1: don't hit on girls at the gym, unless you are ultimate chad

>>41338640
She was literally working out at the moment I asked so she could just say something instead of reporting me at the reception desk afterwards.

> unless you are ultimate chad
But you will never know if you won't try.

>>41338697 ---> >>41338668

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>>41338659
Yeah it was pizza Friday too

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>>41338385
>>41338475
>>41338506

>>41338671
cunt move teebz

Fuck, I know modern women are touchy, but still, how creepy do you have to look to get one to file a report just because you attempted to talk to them once?

>>41338569
A joke has got to be funny to be a joke bud

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>>41338475
>"Hey, are you working out?" I thought that would be funny

>>41338697
What?

If you're the ultimate Chad, you'll have had AT LEAST 18 years of pure success on your back. You wouldn't need to try to know because you already know before you try.

>>41338406
quick solution
dont fucking drop weights you doucher
bet you wear a hat at the gym too

I wish I had your courage.

>>41339229
That is called desperation.

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>>41338475
>"Hey, are you working out?"

>>41338385
You are a creep.

>>41338406
Good, you deserve it loser

>>41338385
what ethnicity are you?

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

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>>41338551
>reports was for staring at girl's ass for like 10 minutes
Is that truth?

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

Well I sometimes ask girls at the swimming pool where are they swimming too, but it's a conversation breaker and after a bit of an uncomfortable silence i elaborate - towards a nice body? Towards swimming some distance at once? That are you working out line is pure autism through.

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>>41338475
Even I'm not this much of a geek, holy shit

You probably came off condecending as fuck to them.

>>41338640
>Having to talk to you and interrupt her workout vs ignoring you and never risk seeing you again.
Its like you don't want her make it.

>>41338475
Don't you dare put me in the screencap lads

>>41338492
half a pl8, why?

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>>41338475
include me in the cap

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autism

>>41343399
It's already been caped and it's on leddit's frount page

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>>41338475
brilliant

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>>41338475
>hey, are you working out?

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>>41338385
>>41338475
Sometimes, this place makes me really wonder about the kind of people I share a gym with. Are you autistic? That's a legitimate question, I'm not memeing. You're at the gym, not the bar

Some faggot posted this thread on Reddit

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Holy shit that's amazing. Tell us about your next gym ban please

>>41338551
Are you white?
>>41338385

>>41338492
2 Yards Why?

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I have actually been observing this type of shit I'm my gym and I cringe every time.

Guys stop fucking trying to get laid at the gym, girls feel really unattractive when they are working out and sweating. They don't wanna be bothered.

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Just... Wow man... why?

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>In college
>See a hot girl working out
>She's listening to her ipod
>Walk up to her
>She sees me and pulls her earbuds out
>Say "You got all that music legally, right?"
>She smiles
>"Yes..."
>I reply with "Aaaargh, Me matey!"
>She laughs
>I laugh
>Suddenly realize I'm a turbo autist and can't carry a conversation beyond the opener.
>Go back to my weight machines.

>>41343890
lmao he must be indian and ugly to boot

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

>>41338475
idk why this is so funny

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>>41338475
>I thought that would be funny because we are already in the gym

>>41338385
Go to a new gym nigger.

>>41344756
>I reply with "Aaaargh, Me matey!"

Sweet fucking Jesus.

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>>41338475
There's one for the scrapbooks lads

>>41338492
17 hands, why?

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>>41338475

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>>41338385
>Banned because I yelled at the gym goy for loading my plates wrong.

Oy gevalt!

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>Hey, are you working out?

Please let this be the new /fit/ meme

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

>>41343795
And here
http://m.hugelol.com/lol/444494?page=rising&count=5&q=

>>41338475
>hey, are you working out?
>hey, are you working out?
>hey, are you working out?
>hey, are you working out?
>hey, are you working out?

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>>41338475
>hey, are you working out?
dude where did you think this was going to take you? she says yes then gives you her number?

>tfw 25 year old kissless friendless virgin but not lonely in the slightest

am i a psychopath

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>>41338475
This should be a Sir comic

I'm sensing a new meme boys. Bout time we got one. 2017 has been a stale year for /fit/ maymays so far, until now it was nothing but people still trying to force sips ans braps.

>>41338475

>visit senpai
>cousin (15) exclaims "pecs" and feels my chest for 10-20 seconds
>asks if I've been working out
>did she think that would be funny?
>definitely not solid
>mfw cousin is being a gym creep
>go to reception desk to report my autistic cousin and hopefully get her banned

>>41346198

Literally wtf why does that say senpai. God fucking damnit it was supposed to say "senpai" not fucking "senpai". I don't even have autocorrect turned on. Does 4chan autocorrect "senpai" to senpai now?

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>>41346216

>>41346216

Ok what the shit is happening here. How long has this bullshit been a feature. Suddenly makes so much more sense now why I've always seen so many people using "senpai" in their comments. Is there a similar feature that autocorrects things to "desu"? Fuck this goddamn weaboo website.

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>>41346216
stop posting anon, i have no idea what you are talking about

>>41338475
He asks, non-autisticly.

>>41338475
I don't understand the huge reaction to this. Honestly that is kind of funny, and sounds like the kind of opening a normie would use.

>>41346246
S m h
t b h
f a m

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>>41338385

That's what you get for prioritizing pussy over /fit/ness

To be honest you fucking deserve it you needy cunt

Pic related it's literally you

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>>41338475
>mfw

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>>41346216

NEWFAG DETECTED
E
W
F
A
G

D
E
T
E
C
T
E
D

>>41346280

Wish I had known this before the weaboo word filters ruined my joke

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

>>41346311

Piss off. I've been in and out of this site for over ten years. I just didn't know about the word filters because I never use those stupid fucking acronyms.

>>41344756
What are you working today?????

When did u start coming here???

Come on man. And don't be autistic and yell ARRRRGHH ME MATEY.

>>41338406

>fag who wears a backwards snapback to the gym and makes a mess with chalk

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>>41346328

>says he's been here for years
>doesn't even know the word filters
>literally thought people actually say phrases like "desu senpai" and "jolly African American"

I'll say it again:

LURK MOAR FAGET
U
R
K

M
O
A
R

F
A
G
E
T

>>41346328
pretty embarrassing desu senpai

>>41346358

>literally thought people said desu senpai

This is a website full of autistic weaboos. Of course I thought they actually talked like that. Not that much more unbelievable than everyone overusing the acronyms.

>>41338492
0'1", why?

>>41346269
Honestly, it depends on the delivery and what OP looks like.

>>41346280
Smh senpai desu desu

>>41338475
If you were good-looking, this would have worked. I've got bad news, anon.

>>41346216
lurk moar

Someone screen cap for next years comic, I can picture it now

>>41338475
>tfw in a gym trying to relax
>some fat fucker who doesn't even lift comes towards me in a desperate approach
>"hey are you working out?"

>>41338461
thats sucks, unless you make eye contact first. I would not try. Just make sure they dont charge you

>>41338475
Reporting for screencap duty

>>41338475

might have worked if it was Ryan Reynolds saying it in a rom com

>>41343890
yeah i am

>>41338475
>h-hey a-are you working o-out hahaha
>w-where are you going?
>w-what do you mean I have to leave I still need to do muh SKWATS

>>41346246
>How long has this bullshit been a feature
Since the /pol/ocaust faget

>>41338475
Posting in eoic bread

>>41338492
0.0016 kilometers, why?

>>41338475
Asking "Hey, are you working out?" and then giving tips on their workout is condescending as fuck. Basically you're telling them what they're doing doesn't even qualify as working out.
No wonder they're rude towards you, you're rude to start off with.

>>41338475
FUEL FOR THE NEW YEARS COMIC COMING EARLY BOYS

>>41346198
Senpai

don't be a Creep
don't be a Retard
don't be Unbearable
don't be a Dick
is this such a hard thing to grasp for people?

>>41346328
>over tens years.
I'm sorry.

>>41338475
Oi but, to be fair to OP, i was swimming laps at the pool once and some super QT literally said to me
"Hey, swimming some laps?"
I said yeah
Took her home and fucked her about 15 minutes later
>this truly happened
>only once tho
So like.... hes not that autistic. Hes just fucking unattractive.

>>41347305
>Don't be unattractive
Ftfy

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>>41338461

>'i like your yoga pants'
>'.....thanks'

Oh, anon...

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>>41338475

This could be the new "Feelin' Fit?"

Say "Hey, are you working out?" The response could be "That's so funny since we are already in the gym."

>>41346328
desu I thought so too senpai

>>41338492
I'm fucking 5'7.75" and I was wearing my lifts so I was easily 5'10"

>>41347561
>.75

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>>41346216
you can not write comedy this good

>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

I'll be honest I chuckled

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>>41338475

WHY
JUST WHY

>>41346358
Wait since when is nigger filtered?

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>>41338475
high quality assburgers

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>>41338475
>"Hey, are you working out?"
I'm not judging you anon, i mean who knows why people go to the gym?

>>41338475
Congrats now you know you're ugly becasue no woman would turn down an autistic Chad.

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>>41338475
somebody screencap

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>>41338475
I WANT TO BELIEVE

>>41338475
Seriously laughing so hard right now. Haven't laughed this hard in a while. Thanks OP I needed this. Keep up the good work

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>>41338475
Goddammit man...

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

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>>41338475
You sound like an autist from /tg/ trying to make new friends at his LGS

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>>41338475

>>41346246
>Hey, are you digging a hole?

>>41347153
this desu senpai, OP is a retard.

>>41338475
>"Hey, are you working out?"
this is good bait

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>>41338475

>>41347492
nah, just have shit like basic hygene at least. don't smell like shit. don't be annoying. shit like that.

alao charm is like 80% of what makes a person attractive, which is why even ugly people get dates

>>41338385
Get a waifu, you fag.Or at least disregard women, they have zero respect for anyone admiring them and wanting to talk to them.

>>41346131
you are super right. i never really noticed

>>41344756
>his opener is a question that can be answered by a simple "yes" or "no"
N00b. If you really want to pick up women, get at least familiar with the basic PUA stuff. But don't get too deep into it, it's a rabbit hole.

>>41346246
baka desu senpai

>>41338475
lol, well. Its definitely funny, in a different way. As in we can all laugh at your stupidity

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>>41346216

>>41347914
If nigger ever became filtered, IDK what I'd do.

>>41338475
come on senpai

>>41338492
3 pl8s, why?

>>41346216
Newfag

>>41346216
Come on senpai, get with the times

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>>41338475
Fucking A+

>yfw OP made up this thread so he could post it on reddit for upvotes

https://www.reddit.com/r/4chan/comments/69mcag/fitzen_gets_banned_from_gym/
>13k upvotes
>over 500 posts, 4x the posts in this thread
lel

>>41346280
I didnt know this desu

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>>41338475
>Hey are you working out?

>>41338492
5'5, I talked to her after climbing out of the manlet pit, so maybe I still had manlet blood and scratches on me.

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>>41344756
>"Aaaargh, me matey"

bro that was one of the single most cringe things you could have said.

she probably didnt even understand you were talking about pirating and laughed to be friendly.

she already thought you were autistic long before that conversation was over, buddy.

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>>41338475
i-it's ok anon
we all make mistakes

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>>41346216
come on
for fuck's sake

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>>41346328
>ten years
then you would know you're making an arse of yourself by replying to everyone

>>41338492
2 scoops, why?

>>41350436
Brah, I could have asked her to fuck me outright and she would have said yes.

Ne'er bet yer doubloons against me. I be loaded to the gunwales, a swashbucklin' gentleman o' fortune, by the powers that be!

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>>41343399
First time capping a thread, please be gentle senpai

>>41352132
9/11

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?
>on the gym

>>41352132
not bad...
not bad at all....

>>41338406
>that guy that doesn't respect the weights
>that guy that doesn't respect the gym
>that guy that cheats himself by skipping half the movement

Just McFucking Kill Your Own Self right heckin now

>>41338475
Can we force this meme lads? I want a new "feeling fit, buddy?"

>>41353055
>no im just here cruising for dick

>>41338475
anon...

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>>41338475
"Hey, are you working out?"

>>41338475

tip top lel

>>41352132

Pretty good. I would've maybe included the reply asking how tall he was, and then to the responses to that as well.

>>41348847
Grow up?

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>>41346216
Fuck gold senpai i mean senpai.

>>41338492
About tree fiddy, why?

>>41338475
ZOOMED WORDS

>>41338475
Holy shit dude

>>41347486
You are so English it hurts

>>41338506
neba lern

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>>41338475
Smooth as silk

>>41346115
Please, SIR, listen to this anon

>>41338475
lemao

>>41338491
Idkw but I can't stop laughing at this.

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?
An instant classic. That would come off as awkward for even the Chadest of Chads

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>Hey, are you working out?

LMAO this entire thread. this my first time on /fit/ and i knew you guys are bad but holy shit this is quality autism. sometimes i forget all boards are at least a bit autistic. thanks for the laugh lads

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>>41338475
>tfw you go to the gym AND work out

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>>41338475
Include me in the screencap

>>41338475
Atleast she didn't test him

>>41338492
17018000000 angstroms, why?

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>>41338475
put me in the screencap

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>>41338461
witnessed

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>>41338475
Hey, are you working out?

>>41338475
Pavey is gay

>>41346403
Moshi Moshi desu senpai kawaii gurugamesh

>>41354706
>everyone works out down here

>>41354706
>>41354823
AND YOU'LL
MAKE IT
TOO
*Deadlifts Georgie for 23 reps*

>>41338475
Interesting. Are you by any chance indian or muslim?

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>>41338475
Get me in the screenshot

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>>41338492
it's piss

>>41338492
1 mile, why?

>>41338492
What is this reddit shit?

>>41338406
>that guy who deadlifts one plate and smashes it on the ground

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>>41338475
include me in capp

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>>41338475
>Het, are you working out?

>>41345729
Dobby?

>>41344756
If she answers yes, and you think she might not get the reference, just respond with "aaargh you sure you didn't pirate it?" or something like that.
Unless you're a manlet, less than significantly above average looking, or socially awkward, then don't attempt an opener like that.

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This is why /fit/ is the last good board

>>41338475
>not flexing your ceps and saying you working out?

I hate to be that chick but women aren't there to meet guys, they just want to work out. If you want to flirt the last place I'd want a guy to is when I'm sweaty

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>>41344119
why don't you eh dance a little

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>>41338475
Put me in it lads

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>>41338475
>Hey are you working out?

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>>41338475
get me in this cap

>>41338492
3' 6", why

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>>41338475

>Hey, are you working out?

>>41338475
JUST

>>41346198

shoulda said famalam desu senpai

>>41355492
yeah I'm sure they go to a public place in a sports bra because they don't want attention

OP is short end of story

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>>41338475
>I thought that would be funny

Oh it's funny alright.

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

>>41338475
It's like when your dad interrupts you when you're playing video games to ask you, "Are ya winnin', son?"
OF COURSE I'M WINNING, FAGGOT! I'M NOT A FILTHY CASUAL! FUCKING CHRIST WHY DID YOU AND MOM DIVORCE WHY WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME

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>>41338492
>>41338506
>>41338475
>>41338385

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>>41338475
>Like "Hey, are you working out?".....
> I thought that would be funny because we are already in the gym.....

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>>41338506
Jesus Christ......

dude

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>>41338475
I need to say I was here for this holy shit

>>41338385
Looks like you rustled their Gymmies

>>41338475
evilJ you madman

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>>41338475

Capped

>>41358581
Include in screencap

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>>41338475
Honestly what
>pic related; it's you

>>41338475
>all these you (you)s
You did it OP, you did it

>>41338475
> hey are you working out ?

Dude, dont bring 4chan shit outside man.

Just leave people alone next time. Nobody likes an obnoxious talkative gym rat.

>>41338475
>my sides
You might suffer great shame but this truly made my morning.
You did some good in this world, anon, take comfort in that

>>41358646
how dare u taint blin kot

>>41338475
Fiction or not, you earned this (you)

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>>41338475
Have you decided how you're going to spend all these (You)s?

>>41338475
>100 replies

Oh my fuck

>>41344119
>girls feel really unattractive when they are working out and sweating
They are retarded and don't deserve human rights

>>41338406
>being so weak that you drop the fucking weights instead of gently placing them down
NEVER GONNA MAKE IT

>>41358646

that hat is the same as MAGA hat, lmao !

>>41338475
Put me in the screen cap, senpai.

>>41338461

Were you at dedman?

>>41359970

Arnold says that no matter how much you are lifting, make it sound like a thousand pounds.

>>41359970
If you can put weights down gently, you are not lifting enough, man.

>>41338475
people train to dodge people like you.

>>41338461
Should of asked for braaaaapps

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>>41338475
include me in screencap

>>41354706
>manletpit.jpeg

>>41338475
just do that at the bar or club or something.

>>41361575
>goes to club
>"h-hey are you working out?"

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>>41338475
for fucks sake man

>>41338506
like POTTERY

>>41338475
A U T I S M
U
T
I
S
M

>>41346280
baka
desu
senpai

>>41338461
>>41338475
>>41338506
>>41344756
>>41346216
This is the best thread in a while. Never change /fit/.

>>41338475
You fuck someone posted this yesterday!

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>>41338475
put me on screencap

Smh
Senpai
Tbh

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>>41338475
>Hey, are you working out?

>>41356093
Holy shit, i did not realise this was a dad thing kek. Dads are memes.

>>41338475
But did it work?

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>>41338385
>>41338475
>>41338492
Include me in the screencap.

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>>41338475
Rereading it, it's still funny

>>41346280
testing
baka
desu
senpai

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>>41338461

>>41348798
Any websites or books to check out?

>>41338475
include me in the flight plan

Okay let's be fair. If I say
>Hey, are you working out?
usually it's because she's doing it wrong, in my way, texting, and/or has no gains. Maybe OP was only being half autistic.

holy fuck anon .-.

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>>41338475
>I thought that would be funny

>>41353242
lmao

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>>41338475
(You)

>>41350084
>linking to plebbit
>not committing suicide

>>41338475
i reported your post it was so creepy

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Toasting epic bread

>>41338475
(You)

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OP must be fucking retarded, everyone knows wasting time with grillls at the gym is a sin punishable with death. How about you drop that beta male act and go do some actual exercises?

>>41338492
4 scoops, whey?

>>41346328
Chanology fag detected.

>>41338385
You didn't want to be nice, you wanted to get laid. You can lie to yourself but not to us.

Hey anons, this boy inspired me, I'll talk to a girl of my gym, the past week she was looking me while I was working out and we have visual contact for like 2 minutes but I don't knew what to say it so I just look away, but today is the day anons, I'll do it. For all of you

>>41338475
put me in the screencap

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>>41338475
>hey a-aare you a wo-orking out?

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300h reply. closed

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>>41338475
this board's autism never ceases to amaze

>>41366320
Ask her if she's working out

>>41338475
put me in the screencap please i've never been in one before

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>>41338406
>that guy that throws the weights on the ground

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>>41338475

>>41338475
Tbh senpai i think this line may work for me, but im 6'5" and handsome

>>41338475
Welcome to the ugly boat. You literally were cursed with genetics that make it impossible to court a woman.

>>41352132
>not zoomed words.

Into the trash it goes fampai

>>41338475
I fucking cannot wait for Sir to use this in the New years comic

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>>41338475
Include me on the screencap

Also fuck u reddit

>>41354706
Aren't you gonna ask... to work in?

>>41346280
Smh doesn't have shit

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>>41344756
>I reply with "Aaaargh, Me matey!"
what the fuck

Let's be real here. If you dipshits wanted a girl, you'd pick someone who at least knew you from somewhere like work or school. Then you'd just ask to take them for coffee or to study together. If you need to bother a woman at the gym, at least ask them what workouts they're doing and say you want to try that because it makes them look fit and you want to be fit too or bullshit like that.
>Tl;dr: talk to people you know instead of strangers if you're even mildly autistic or socially awkward

>>41338569
thing about jokes is they gotta be clever too, not just unexpected

>>41358489
This needs a part 2 seeing how big this thread got