Mirin thread?

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>>40944953

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>>40945393

>At mall
>One of those days where you look pumped as hell for some reason
>Standing in line to get a Cinnabon bc fuck it
>Fat high school age girl loudly says to her friend "that guy has bigger tits than you do"
>Look over
>They quickly look away and start giggling and whispering
>Look straight ahead for the rest of the time bc autism
I guess I have a nice chest even though everything else is mediocre.
My proudest recent moment is when a drunken thot asked if she could touch my chest and I just said "no" and walked off.

>doing chin-ups today
>125lb manlet-levers
>fast reps because f=mxA
>6/10 nigress elbows her friend and points at me, smiling
>nigress 2 says something along the lines of "he's good"
>wtf
why do females find stupid shit impressive?

>workin' out, lookin juicy
>hit a new pr bench of 115
>girl looked in my general direction after

was she mirin??

>>40945474
Maybe her little brother's name is "Good" and you reminded her of him, because no adult male should weigh 125 lbs.

>>40945474
How the fuck are you 125 lbs? My 14 year old brother is heavier than that and he's all skin and bones.

>>40945581
that better be kilos you weak baby faggot
stop posting and go back to the gym

>>40945581
I'm too drunk to tell if you're kidding or not but you won't get mires until you're doing 3 and some change unless you're at planet fitness or sumn

>>40945689
it's pounds, but thats still pretty good right

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>>40945702
no
kys
benching under 3pl8 is not pretty good

>>40945670
>>40945688
by not being a glutton?

>>40945581
>115
bro my 5x5 progression is 120# right now but no, not mirin.

Doesn't mean you shouldn't try to use your winning personality and talk to her though :)

>>40944953
this new qt in a different dept at work has been mirin super hard for the past month but I'm transfering in two months to another state and coming up with a million excuses to ignore it and do nothing.

>>40945749
>by being Supreme King of Manlets
FTFY

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>with dad in Barca for second time last friday
>get in tourbus for north route of the city (last time took South route)
>Recognize qt catalan tour guide from last year
>Dont say shit because she obviously wouldnt remember cause she sees faces daily
>No two seats available
>give dad Seat and stand next to him
>QT catalan tourguide tells me I have to sit
>Shrug and sit where Im standing, get a few laughs from other Passengers and tour guide
>Tell her I need parential guidance as a joke and cant leave my dads side
>She giggles and points me to a Seat next to An older Aussie lady like one Seat behind hers
>Proceed bants with tourguide and old Aussie lady, tour guide keeps making cracks at me
>Tell old Aussie lady she was mean to me last year too (a joke)
>Tour guide asks what she did last year
>Dad is older and I wanted to club but had no one to go with
>Told her Ill share and forgive if shes willing to give me a tour of the city at night
>She agrees
>Exchange numbers
>meet when shes off shift and go clubbing with her Friends
>Nice people
>Mad flirting with tour guide, text dad Ill be back at the hotel early in the morning
>She takes me to her place
>We fug :DD, arms back and chest constantly catching her nails
>Passionate sex, lots of movement, use functional strength to toss her around a bit
>Shes loving it
>Afterwards says all guys here are either Skinny or fat (true) and that Im built and strong AF (Im not) and is constantly still touching me
>Spend the rest of the night sharing stories and bashing Spanish people while cuddling
>Go back to hotel next morning
>Dad high fives me
>Prepare for flight back
>Never kept to my end of the deal

Barcelona is fucking amazing and old Aussie ladies are top tier

>Get home and realise how much I enjoyed the cuddling and get tfw no GF
>Mfw

>>40946594
>Old Aussie ladies are top tier wingmen*

>be me
>be doing squats
>finish a set
>see a cutie on a treadmill looking at me
>maintain eye contact
>she maintains eye contact
>i'm not going to look away first
>end up looking at each other for ~7 seconds

>>40946622
>mutual autism

>>40946634
delete this

>>40945428
not saying
>these are muscles, not tits while flexing them

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> new blonde qt (about 5ft7) joined together with all the NYRS
> she's one of the few who've stayed
> she's already fit but does cardio every day when I'm there
> turns out she has bf, he's there once a week
> absolute dyel and 5ft7 as well
> learn she's 24 (same as me) and he's 32
> qt blonde is wearing light grey leggings
> insane camel toe, I make eye contact with both her and her clit
> work really hard to not look at her more and do my sets
> she's constantly staring with a completely blank face
> go to do cable flies at the end
> couple goes to leg press machine right in front of me
> qt does some light leg presses for 10 reps, good form
> dyel bf adds like 200 more pounds and goes for quarter reps
> but the worst part, my fucking god
> he locks out his knees violently at every single rep
> mfw can see his knees almost bend the wrong way
> can't unsee the videos that have been here recently, plus the old one with the lady
> my knees even start hurting just from seeing it
> consider giving him some tips or just showing him the video
> walk over to them, I see he's wearing fucking lifting gloves @leg day
> decide I can't save this retard, I'm gonna let darwinism take care of this one
> tell reception bro about the whole deal
> he agrees we can't save him, if it's not gonna be his knees snapping its gonna be something else

I'm pretty sure the blonde is mirin, I've been lifting for 2 years and am already the biggest in my gym (my whole country is filled with dyels). Should I just wait for bf to leave for snap city before I try to ram his gf?

>>40946622
So who looked away first?

>>40946769
What county are you from if it's full of DYELs?
Ethopia?

>>40946782
Her :)

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>at the gym working out
>a guy in his mid-fiftes I sometimes chat with asks how my workout is going
>he's in good shape for a natty lifter his age; he's been lifting for 30 years
>"Pretty good", I tell him
>"You know", he says "I've been watching you train, and god-damn, you are strong as hell."
>"Thanks."
>"You're handling big fucking weight with good form, that's impressive", he continues
>"Well, I guess I'm okay shape for a guy my size."
>he laughs and we continue our workouts

I am close to making it, I can feel it. Dare I say, a qt gf might even be just around the corner.

>>40946874
>older man mires make me feel warm inside

>>40946769
There's nothing wrong with a 32 being together with a 24 year old.

>at bus stop
>qt kinda hipster looking girl keeps glancing at me
>I smile at her
>she smiles and blushes like crazy

Also
>overheard a group of thots talking about me in the library
>they said that they thought I was handsome and that they thought I must have a big cock because of the bulge in my pants

Not exactly the most extreme mirin stories but they actually happened recently and they made me feel good

>>40947048

When they're both 5'7 there is.

.t 6'0 master of manlets

>>40946874
Have you been hitting neck?

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>>40944953
>medical checkup for college
>no one knows ive been lifting for 6 months during autumn and winter
>we go in one by one
>my turn
>cute blond doctor girl is in there
>gives me a warm welcome
>asks me some basic stuff and gets talking to me
>tells me to take my shirt of so she can check my breathing
>undress and sit on the hospital bed
>she listens to my breathing
>after im done she say "so which sports do you do, because you're clearly doing something"
>tell her i did waterpolo and swimming
>"yea it shows"
>after that she told me to pull my pants down because she has to check my balls and we chatted a bit while she was stroking my nuts
>after she's done she gives me a big smile and we part ways

Now i dont know if i can call that miring, but for a 21 yearold, recovering lanket, virgin i think i did well.

Also after that i've been getting asked by women in college if im working pretty often and i always lie about it because im retarded and i feel like im tryharding if i say that ive been going to the gym.

>work in a restaurant
>there's a cutie who comes in a lot
>we always have a chat
>i lost weight over the last months
>i look much better but never really thought about how girls see me
>meet her outside last weekend
>we chat like always
>i'm ready to say okay, see ya later, when suddenly -
>SHE asks ME out
>i could not have been more surprised
>happily accept, swap numbers

>>40947133
You better fug her brains out

>>40946979
Are you agreeing that mires from experiences lifters feels especially good, or are you >implying something?

>>40947108
Perhaps. Why do you ask?

>>40947121
>after that she told me to pull my pants down because she has to check my balls and we chatted a bit while she was stroking my nuts
Sure she did. Faggot.

>>40947121
>we chatted while she stroked my nuts
>then she sucked my cock for medical reasons
>she asked me to watch her dildo herself to test my vision
>alarm clock goes off and i trudge my way to school

>>40946594
That was a field Report, Nice.
Wish you all the spanish pussy you can handle

>>40944953
gf told me i had a nice ass

>>40947141
trying not to overthink it rn but that's the general plan

>>40946833
pls tell me you went and talked to her!

>>40947133
similar story
>be in gym
>be 185 lbs 6 ft DYEL
>see qt3.14 i always see
>want to ask her out
>finish work out fast bcoz bro has to leave early
>grow enough balls (2) to ask her out
>friend calls me over
>mirin, says i look great
>say thanks and talk for a min
>follow qtpi and drink water until she finishes her set
>wave at her from 1 ft away and say hey
>she takes her earphones out
>smiles and says hey
>get excited
>i dont know if this is weird or anything but, do u wanna go out sometime?
>smiles
>i feel good, but i dont get that feeling, even tho ive never had a gf or asked a girl out, i know the "feeling", and i aint feelin it
>she says no way what
>why
>some one bet u to ask me?
>she's smiling the whole time so im like wtf
>i say no im serious, like--
>noo someone bet u to ask me out
>no why-- what-- im serious
>oh, i have a boyfriend
>oh sorry
>walk off
>not even upset because i didnt develop oneitis or some shit
>still disappointed tho
>feelsnotthebestman

>>40947143
Post neck

>>40947214
At least you got over your fears. That is the most important step. I wish I could get there...

>>40947181
Dont let any catalan hear you call them spanish they'll bite your dick off

>>40947214
Well done man, do this like 50 times and you will have a qt3.14 gf.

Respect.

>>40947242
ive seen her around for about a month, and i went like 4 days without seeing her, so i made a plan to just ask her next time i see her because idk if ill see her again or if someone else would ask her out, u just gotta go for it man, i was feeling so confident b4 i asked her out, and her denial doesnt even phase me, im so surprised with my self honestly

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>>40946874
That's what I thought too anon, thinking a qt gf was around the corner after getting compliments on my body
Almost 3 years after lifting and still no gf.

>>40947214
to clarify, she didnt say, "no way", what?" as in, no way ill ever go out with you, but more like, no waaay, whaat? like she was confused

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>>40944953
Old woman on the train said I have big legs

>>40947252
i hope so

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>>40946833
>>40946622

>>40947263
Have you tried asking out the girls who compliment you on your body?

>>40947196
I'm not at that point yet. I can maintain eye contact pretty easily but I can't smile and definitely can't approach.

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>>40947214
You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take

>>40947290
smiling is one of your biggest weapons!
They love mens that smile confidently.
Approaching is the only way to get pussy, if you dont do it, you must realize that you are losing!
You are losing grills, you are losing expirience!
If you dont approache you are losing!
The only way to Lv up is go outside you comfort Zone!
Just do it beta, you can get pussies too!

>>40947369
whos fucking dinosaur arm is that

if it's his that's startling because it gets bigger as it goes along which is weird

if it's hers then holy shit run while you have the chance she probably shits lava

How do I start to enjoy working out?
I always end up feeling shitty afterwards and never the good kind of tired.

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>>40947164

>>40947369
>no ass

>>40947533
The light colored part is his naked forearm.
The dark colored part is her sleeved forearm.

>>40947670
try loads of different stuff, depends what you like, for example I know running is good for you but personally don't like it, whereas cycling i do all the time and enjoy weightlifting

>>40947696
Kek, when I saw this post first thing I looked at was guys ass, and then I realized you might have been talking about the grill.

thanks /fit/

>>40947214
Sounds like a cunt.

>walking to bus stop with uni classmate
>asks about my hobbies
>tell him lifting and he asks how much I squat
>82kg
>wow that's a lot
Not much by /fit/ standards and still dyel after first month of gym but felt good

>go meet some friends I hadnt seen in a very long while, pretty much since I started lifting, which is a year and a half or so
>some of my friends are sitting, others are chatting standing up
>oneitis is there, there's always been some kind of weird tension between us
>some friend asks me to sit down with them
>i jokingly say i'd rather stand up to see if I grow up (idk if this is a saying anywhere else, but it is in spain)
>oneitis says "grow up even more?"
>laugh awkwardly and sit down

what did she mean by this?

>>40947214
She tried to decline imo
Too persistent on the idea of bet

>>40947774
>n-no homo

>>40947941
You are tall enough to ride.
Godspeed anon

>>40947941
>not responding 'Am I a big guy for you'?

>>40946594

>Barca

Kys

>>40945688
If I was a fish I'd be dead: the post

>>40947484
Yeah I guess I know all this deep down. Baby steps though, right?

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>>40945736
>benching under 3 plate isnt good

Found the fatty

>>40947170
Ayy lmao

>be me
>enjoying sweet noob gains combined with dbol
>new haircut
>visit senpai
>cousin (15) exclaims "pecs" and feels my chest for 10-20 seconds
>asks if I've been working out
>flex arm "you tell me"
>"oh my god"
>holds my arm as we walk along the street with her friend later that day
>touches my abs at dinner
>"solid"

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happened last night, cos i'm a degenerate with no self control
>went on a night out with some friends and a few other peeps
>includes a hot blonde sloot and her shy qt friend
>blondie is flirtan pretty shamelessly
>we high five for some reason idk, i swung a little hard and she acts like it hurt but she's laughing
>i offer my hand for her to smack as hard as she can so she does, then says i should high five her as hard as i can
>stick my arm out and say are you sure about that
>feel a hand on my arm, qt friend next to her has decided to feel my >>>>>>>'ceps
>literally flex a 'cep with her hand around them
>she practically jumps backwards, hands over her mouth, gives me a wide eyed look like holy fug
>like an hour later after realising blondie is a path well travelled i let her do her own thing and chat to qt
>we swapped numbers, she texted me both last night and this morning without me replying
feelsprettyfuckingamazingman.jpg
what do i text her back to give myself the best chance of asking her out brehs? i'm deece at flirting in flirty situations but horrible over messages

>>40946796
What's an Ethopia?

>>40947121
You've posted this at least twice

>>40948148

you still haven't replied at all? that window is closing braj. not too late tho. just tell her you wanna see her again and ask her for coffee its not that fukn hard. protip stop drinking the negging/not texting back koolaid. in my experience girls that respond positively to those techniques are not the kind of girls you want anything to do with in the longterm anyway

$0.02

>>40947147
>>40947164
>what is testicular cancer

there have been big campaigns about this shit for the last 2-3 years. And everytime you go get a "systematic check-up" here they check your balls, you fucking retards. If i wanted to role play i'd probably say how her jaw dropped after revealing my cock. She just did a routine check of my ball tubes or whatever, trying to find lumps ( which would indicate testicular cancer )

>at bar with friend
>milfy bartender (43 years old European and Brazilian hot as fuck) serving us
>she wants my nuts bad for the past like year or so but I'm married so i never fuck around
>plus she's a total bitch, princess syndrome, entitled as fuck think she deserves a rich man to spoil her and that she's the hottest thing In the world despite being a 43 year old single mom to a 24 year old and fuckin tends a bar for a living.
>always watch her "work" betas and lonely old dudes by flirting and whatnot getting them to buy expensive shots and tip a lot
>walk in and she's all over me
>fuck forgot it's her night
>proceed to get hammered, she gives me a few free shots
>starts flirting with me heavily remind her once again I'm married and she leaves me alone
>starts working on some scrawny white dude next to me
>trying to appear exotic and sexy and shit rolling her R's and dancing while shaking a cocktail
>call her out aaaaayyyy lmfao u don't even speak Spanish or Portuguese
>starts trying to chew me out in Spanish
>correct her grammar and verb conjugation
>customers laugh at her turns out whitebro is an international chef and speaks like 5 languages
>milftender comes over to me and starts shit testing me we banter back n forth for a few minutes until I fuck up and say something that hurts her feelings
>"yea well dude at least I'm not a middle aged bartender"
>loses her fuckin mind "BITCH WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, COMING INTO MY BAR AND DISRESPECTING ME. I HAVE 2 JOBS I OWN A CONDO I DRIVE A NEW CAR blah blah WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE BESIDES NICE ARMS AND DIMPLES?"
>god tier buddy makes up some shit "this dude owns a house in downtown SD"
>roll with it "yupp 10 minutes from GasLamp, plus I got my truck, my project muscle car, my wife's car, and my commuter car" (those are true)
> ask for check
>23 bucks, on like 11 drinks (bought a few for my buddy)
>comes back and says oh I undwrcharged you. It's 25
>scans my card again for the amount of 25
>cont

>>40948148
>nice meeting you last night, coffee this afternoon?

>>40948263
>wtf dude you double charges me 23, and 25? You should've rang it up for just 2 dollars
>"oh don't worry I'll void the first one"
>saying bye to people at bar
>milf tender comes around to say bye and I brush her off
>starts chewing me out again about disrespecting her yadda yadda waving her hand like a knife in my face
>I've had enough
>grab her wrist and calmly but sternly tell her "calm the fuck down. Your a fucking adult. Your middle aged, your kids only 2 years younger than me for goddsakes it's time to nature. Stop acting like a spoiled fucking high school cheerleader your a middle aged bartender.
>melts into me and starts kissing neck and feeling chest and says "I knooow" kind of half moaning "I just need a man to fuck me hard and put me in my place"
>gently push her away and say "well I ain't the one sweety, I'm married" but grope her enormous tits as I push her back
>step out and leave
>black dude sitting in corner says dam my brotha and fist bumps me on the way out
>uber home
>check bank statement she voided out both transactions
>drank for free whole night so out of her tops I guess, put that bitch in her place, and grabbed her huge rack
>never going back there again

And that's how I got mired by a room full of lonely men for not succumbing to the succubus

>>40948197
no i replied to her first one last night, she texted me again once i went to sleep and then a few hours ago

>>40947214

Somewhat similar story as well. Yesterday I got rejected for the first time.
>Met girl at a party, we hit it off
>Do not escalate anything too much and get her snap
>Talk to her yesterday, drop the hint that I want to see her
>Tells me she will be out for the whole easter break.
>Tell her "I'll see you when you come back then"
>-"For sure! :)"

After being afraid of hitting on girls, I finally did it familia. I experienced rejection and it's not that bad. I feel fucking great now, like I lifted a huge stone from my chest.

>>40947237
Nah, it's pretty thin, so it's not worth the trouble. Why are you so interested in my neck?

>>40948323
These are the stories i come to these threads for, not just filling myself with delusions that some girl might look at me in the gym if i get big enough.

>>40948323
Fuaaaaaaaa

>>40946653
From the makers of flexing a 'cep...

>Spring break, go back home from uni because too poor for Miami partying
>Buy the 1-week membership at my local gym
>Head to the gym with my dad and sister, 70 and 12 years old respectively
>start off leg day with squats
>don't see her myself, but sister notices my ex of a couple years ago walking out of the locker room, noticing me squatting, and stopping in her tracks for about five seconds, staring at me
>see her about 10 minutes later, strike up conversation
>no bad vibes, didn't feel awkward at all
>finishing workout with clean and jerk, good pump going and slightly dehydrated so looking cut
>notice ex staring from the elliptical
>she texts me later "when did you get so fucking ripped?"
>wants to hang out

She's chill and nice, and decently good-looking, but I'm not sure I want to get back into an ex. There's too many attractive girls at uni to get me to settle down for one chick.

>>40948115
>not flexing your 'cep
not gonna make it

>>40948425
>>40948443

Glad you all enjoyed it. Muy buddy in the story is brand new to lifting, been training with me for about a year maybe a little less and went from never lifted before to hitting 1/2/3/4 pretty easily starting to look good has good build now. He's a KV at age 27 though so I see myself as training him in that department too seeing as how I'm happily married to my best friend. Really glad he saw me de-claw that bitch in her natural habitat so now he won't succumb to the same type of trickery women in the service industry use on lonely men. I'm 6'3 260lbs btw with a a little over a 1400lb total decently built but a bit of a beer gut because Marinefag

>>40948323
You made it bro, stay loyal to your wife

>at club
>guy starts asking to fight me outside
>not sure what to do
>go outside
>he takes his shirt off
>not sure whats going on so just copy him
>my mate split it up and offer him a shot to calm things down
>we go back inside club, the guys chill as fuck
>a girl comes over and asks if she can feel my six pack
>ends up asking for my number
>give her a fake number
>first and only time I think I've ever been mired
>still don't know why the guy wanted to fight me
>still don't understand why he was fine with me after my mate bought him a shot

>>40948469
You can still fuck her, anon. You don't have to get back together with her. Make it a FWB arrangement. She wants the D.

Why in the fuck don't women ever make the first move?

>eating sandwich at local cafe
>tucked away in corner so I can read my book
>it's late so a girl comes out and starts to clean up
>her uniform is loose but somehow that ass is still fat
>she catches me checking her out
>stare in her eyes and grin, she smiles
>I go back to read my book but can tell she's mirin'
>she starts sweeping tables next to mine
>ask her why she's sweeping the carpet

got her number, made a date. turns out she was a virgin and took her virginity.

>>40948796
Because women want confident men.

>>40944953
why is she so ugly, she looks like an elementary schooler with half a down syndrome.

>>40948469
Fuck her, but keep in the front of your mind why she's an ex. Whatever that reason is, it likely hasn't changed.

>>40948821
This isn't a satisfactory answer.
I want confident women. They should be making the first move as much as men do, by your logic. Yet they do not.

>>40944953
uhh

all of the girls at my shitty new restaurant job talked to me

i look dyel as shit in my faggy ass work uniform shirt but at least its something.

>>40948837
>elementary schooler
that sounds like a skateboard trick

>>40948855
Women instinctively want strong, confident men, in the same way that men instinctively want women with narrow waists, wide hips, and nice tits. Women look for qualities that indicate they (and any offspring) will be protected by their mate, men look for qualities that indicate they'll have healthy children from their mate.

>>40948954
Ok.
How does anything you said relate to making the first move?

>>40948983
if you're too much of a pussy to make the first move, what are the chances you'll make a good partner?

>>40947170
That goofy ass motherfucker lmao

>>40948086
>making excuses for your shit progress

>>40948954
Huh? Men don't like nice tits. Men like ugly tits.

>>40948855
Women want to feel safe and protected. You're supposed to provide that. They don't want to risk being vulnerable.

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who else here thigh mirin

>>40948115
Stop posting this shit

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>>40947170
2spooky

>>40946653
>but then again you're not autistic

>>40947170
look at the way he runs

>>40949435
oh thanks i was watching the other players

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>>40949254
Nty, im ok for the moment

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Help me guys. There is that qt in my highschool that I can't understand.
>Got a match on tinder with her.
>Unmatched me immediately.
>A day before we talked when me and my school mate went outside to smoke some ciggarettes.
>We had a nice chit chat about the universities we are planning to go to.
>Every time I'm around she mires at me.
>I've just lost 10 kg and started lifting got looking attractive. And I'm not used to any attention.
What to think /fit/ does she like me or thinks that I'm a creep?

>>40949461
women are mentally ill children

>>40949461
Stop smoking

>>40949461
iiwy i'd ask her out asap, cos the window of opportunity doesn't last long even if she does currently like you. if it turns out she doesn't then no big deal at this point, she says no and you both get on with your lives, but that does she doesn't she limbo is a bad place to be in regardless of how she feels right now. also if it turns out she doesn't but you don't pull the trigger now, a) you'll waste a month plus thinking about her and focusing on her when you could be getting on with shit/pursuing other girls, and b) you'll seem like way more of a creep if you're just kind of generally around, semi-flirting for ages rather than just getting it out of the way

>>40949555
I'm not just went with my mate but didn't smoke. She did tho. Didn't write that to simplify greentext.

>>40947170
i'm not ready to die

>>40948323
This sounds a little outlandish, but if it actually happened (which I don't think it did), then nice job bro.

>be me
>doing lat pulldowns
>mid of set
>small bitch boy looks at me
>constantly looks at me
>eye contact for several minutes
>clearly wants to fuck
i know you are here, show urself

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>>40948323
>married at 26

>>40949576
and look where that got you. counting mine, we're 3 posts into a clarification exchange.

>>40949708
True story dude 100 percent. I have more incredulous mirin stories at that same bar, swear to god that place is like a portal to a realm of temptation and lust. Probably never gonna go back there ever which sucks since it's just a few streets from my house but whatever there's nothing there for me anymore. Forgot the epilogue to that story

>wake-up next day at like 5am because biological alarm clock from working all week
>check phone
>1 new DM on Snapchat
>it's the milftender
>"heeeeyyyy, you sure do know how to push my buttons (tongue emoji).... got me all worked up last night"
>how in the fuck?
>remember she asked to see my phone because she "liked my case"
>clevergirl.jpeg
>delete plus block
>wife's still sleeping
>snuggle up with her and go back to bed

>>40948469
>being dehydrated during workout
You have much bigger problems than choosing which girl to fuck desu

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>at the gym and some guy calls me 'hoss'
>at the gym and some guy compliments my squat form
>at the gym and another guy who looked pretty buff but no legs said he wish he could squat as much as me
>at work
>garbage can is full of tile and stone and other trash
>boss says let's take it down together, lemme go to the bathroom real quick
>realize I can do it on my own
>take it downstairs, take the bag out, put new one in and come back
>damn anon, you carried that thing by yourself, forget that you young guys are strong
>tfw no merlins from qts

It's a mixed feel.

>>40950162
sex is sex bro, get it wet or get it doodooey, dick don't know the difference

>walking out of bar w/ gf and her friend
>her friend says she can't walk behind me anymore
>ask her why
>can't stop looking at my butt
EXCUSE ME!!

>>40950415
maybe it's a extra bad butt and she likes being amused by badbutt

>>40950431
dont

>>40950435
on it

>>40945428
sry dude, you just have gyno

>>40946594
Am i reading this right? You fucked the old aussie?

>>40948414
with hitting neck he means sucking dick

>>40948799
Fuck me sideways and call me a faggot. Holy shit can you post your physique? When will this happen to me? probably never unless i begin smiling when women look at me...

>>40950137
post more stories faggot.

>>40950415
u should ask gf for threesome with her friend.

if she says WTF? say hahaha jokes just wanted to tease you.

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OKAY I NEED HELP, so women sometimes stare at me as they walk past in a blank face. i look at them/stare back but find it impossible to smile back. How do i fix this? hurts so much.

>>40945702
Its better than the average person who isnt a fatfuck. Keep up with da progress brah

>Work at wedding venue as a server
>Attractive 30-40something blonde woman attends the wedding
>Always looking in my direction
>Never talk to any other servers but me
>Refers to me by name because of nametag
>Gets super close whenever she talks to me
>Tfw too beta to really move in on her
Plus she had a kid with her but no ring. Still felt good man

>>40950699
>say hahaha jokes just wanted to tease you

>>40944953
My coworkers cute, blonde, college freshman, Christian daughter came in one day. Saw her a few times at work and we made eye contact. Didn't seem disgusted with me. When she came in with her mom she introduced me. I waved and said what's up. Her eyes lit up and she was giddy with excitement as she waved. Like I was some pop star. Really boosted my confidence.

I also flirt with this cute older customer that kind of looks like Taylor swifts plain older sister. Skinny as a twig, cute face, long accentuated neck. But she is so shy and cute.

Finally changing from that fat weirdo in high school no one likes. Time to start manipulating and breaking hearts soon.

>>40950527
Ah, ok.

>>40950676
I posted this one a few months ago and it got hilariously voocarooed by an Aussie guy
>same bar with buddy from earlier story and other buddy after a killer back day still in gym clothes
>brought in some delicious Singapore chow mei fun because bar doesn't serve food
>bartender that night is a cute faced mid twenties blonde who's a little to big for my taste (into petite grills) but /fit/ would call her THICC. Big tits and ass but just a little too soft for my taste
>comes over and asks what I brought her
>tell her Singapore noodles but she can only have some if I get to spoon feed her
>deal
>fake like I'm gonna put it in her mouth but then pull out and eat the forkful myself because it's fucking yummy, plus fuckin sharing food with some ganga
>laughs and goes back to work
>later that night comes over and hugs my neck from behind and says I need a favor
>what's up
>I need to change kegs and it's too big and heavy for me but your a big strong guy
>follow her to back room
>she points our the keg, it's one of those tall not so wide ones
>squat down bear hug it stand up and flip it on my shoulder
>bartender girl gasps
>walk it up to front of bar
>second buddy used to work at a brewery and is now a distributor, lies his ass off and says "dude that's a 300lb keg!". It was like 100 max
>all the girls in the bar Merlin
>bartender is all blushy thanks me and gives me a kiss on the cheek.
>slides me a Cadillac margarita a little later on the house

Tried to wingman my buddy into getting with her but he creeped her the fuck out. She has a comic book character tattoo and he LOVES comics, sperged out and started talking too much about comics and she just went like "yeaaaa I'm not THAT into them I just like the tattoo design" and walked away

>>40948267
>>40948197

>asking

Nope, he should tell her to meet him for coffee.

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>>40944953
I suppose I'll post this again.

>>40945428
>at cinnabon
>girls snickering about your tits
>tfw permabulk forever alone

>be me
>have heart murmur
>been having trouble sleeping lately
>go to doctors this morning
>"you lift weights HOW MANY days a week? this is too much"
>"you eat HOW MUCH protein? this is too much"
>"you ONLY do cardio 3 times a week? this is not enough"
>"look at your hands, too much weight lifting"
>"your muscles are so tight, too much weight lifting"
>"you're not taking illegal body building 'helpers' right?"
dude was so jelly, mirin so hard with his "1g/lb is way too much" "testing one rep max is not healthy" "shooting chinese bathtub chemicals into your ass isn't healthy"

>>>40944953

> with half a down syndrome

Kek

>>40947121
t.penis inspection day

>>40948323
I don't care if it's real or not, I choose to believe you.

>>40951112
>Yep

Damn u cold, give us a bit of a back story

>>40949254
What thef ugg is he doin

>>40948799
This is Ryan gosling in drive like. I want to be like this one day.

>>40949458
I would've kept Kurisu and let Mayuri die if I have to be totally honest

>>40950932
>Time to start manipulating and breaking hearts soon
Nothing like crushing the hopes of delusional roasties

>>40948385
how is that rejection? she said she would see you when she gets back.

>>40947170
I laughed and the more i rewatched it the harder I laughed

>>40950637
i'm not posting my body but there are way better looking guys that post here. i do look like I lift when wearing clothes though.
protip: if a girl ever catches you looking at her just meet her gaze. if she holds the gaze then she's interested.

>>40952154
i've been on 40 dates in the last 4 years but no one has asked me out twice. and i'm only 30. how to cope with the idea of most likely being alone for the rest of the life?

>>40951385
>Gorgeous black grill neighbor.
>Always loads of sexual tension, but never really talk
>Eventually end up inviting her over during game night with my buddies and their gfs.
>everyone leaves
>she stays
>we have the fantastic sex
>ffw a month, a dozen dates and tons of sex.
>at work trying to write a report on a rape...shit is dark.
>neighbor texts me
>responding: " yep"

The reality is I was completely turned off by the task at hand. Had 0 interest in doing anything but putting my head through a wall.

>>40946594
Catalonia is not spainnnnnnNNNNNN
Kidding, i know i'm dyel as fuck, but at least i'm not fat (living IN Barcelona)

>>40949461
Just ask during a normal conversation, just be sure to be nonchalant about it. Maybe say that you swipe right on everyone because it's easier to go back to look over and unmatch girls. Then ask if she unmatched you because she didn't want you scrutinizing her bio

It all depends on your level or rapport with her and how comfortable she is with a little teasing from ya. Fuck if I know

>>40947077
>thots
>library
That happened

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>>40952127
You and everyone else in the world m8.

But everyone also knows that the best girls are actually.....

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>work as a chef at an Asian restaurant
>mostly white washed Asian food
>owner brings in new qt Japanese lil thang to try and authentify the place
>coke bottle shape unf just my type
>owner tells me to introduce her to some of the dishes
>gonna make her teriyaki stir fry
>she's watching me cook as I'm flexin tossin shit in the wok
>she got that glazed look in her eyes
>I know she wants it bad
>I grab her and rip off her top
>I pour two tablespoons in the wok
>mfw she's mirin

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>>40950726
>girls do this to me
>I'm a skinny 6/10 manlet

somehow i don't think they were miring me

>>40952528
Holy shit top fucking kek

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>>40950726
>find it impossible to smile back.
You can't just raise your mouth angles because people subconsiouly realise it is a fake smile. Ideally you think about something that makes you happy so you just start smiling naturally.

If you don't have something that makes you happy than the thing is a little more complicated. But I developed a technique that apparently mimics a real smile a little better at least for me. I did read somewhere that the skin beneath the outer part of the eyes moves a little up when you smile naturally so I tried to raise the outer part of my eyes like pic related (sadly I'm even shittier at drawing than explaining, but I hope it is clear) Whenever I do that my mouth angles also raise a little. Since I started doing that people actually smile back and talk normal to me, so I guess it is good enough, so they can't tell that I'm dead inside. I don't know if this works for anyone else, though.

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>>40952528

>>40952528
you tried

>>40945474
>fast reps because f=mxA

That's not how you should think of muscular contraction, you're not after the force exerted on the object lifted, but after the tension developed in the muscle cells.

>>40949333
>>40948519
t. newfags

this copypasta is like 5 years old

>>40949461
underaged b&

>>40944953
>be me
>go to buy mattress for new apartment, wearing a hoodie and jeans
>sales woman is kinda cute
>recommending mattresses
>"this one would be good for you cause youre a pretty broad shouldered guy"
>thank you lateral raise super/dropsets

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>>40950381
>get it wet or get it doodooey, dick don't know the difference
>get it wet or get it doodooey
>get it doodooey
>doodooey
top de la kekarino, my fucking sides

>>40948115
keep us updated on your progress

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>>40948799
>ask her why she's sweeping the carpet

kek

>>40950144
underrated

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> in the gym
>Doin muh powercleans
>really nice uni gym so we have oly platforms
>Load up 115kg
>notice two volleyball grills behind me, both watching
>sweating.gif
>Walk up and fucking clean that shit
>drop the weight, volleyball grills leave the whilst looking back
>they stayed to watch
>mfw

>>40945474
x is displacement nigger

>>40948263
>always watch her "work" betas

>walk in and she's all over me

>>40953873
kek

>>40948611

some people only react to and respect agression, when you said yea let's go, he saw someone worthy of respect

Happens a lot that people who get into a fight develop a friendship

>>40952310
Stop being a little bitch and ask them for a second?

>>40947276
>>40946874
mires from older people are always the most legit

>doing pull ups with 30kg attached
>whole weights section stops to watch
usually i train at my home gym, this was weird. also got a lot of looks for 4 plate squats.

also on friday night:
>lying in bed with girl i fucked
>tell her about how i ended up wrestling some guy with our shirts off the night before
>tell her i won
>"i'm not surprised"

>>40948469
>with my dad and sister, 70 and 12 years old respectively

Can we clear this up please? Are you trying to say your father was 58 years old when your sister was born? He had a child at 58? How old is your mom?

>>40944953
>be at subway
>girl looks at me for more than 3 seconds

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>>40947170

>>40948469
nice, bro. sounds awesome. reminds me of this:

>be on beach with family
>talking about my business with my dad
>he points over to the beach
>"did you see that girl looking at you earlier?"
>look over
>absolutely gorgeous blond is reading a book
>feel great

>on another holiday
>at dinner, eating some fucking lovely food
>parents mention that we have an admirer (me and little bro who also hits the weights, heavy compounds etc)
>we look over to table they gestured to
>4 15/16 year old girls all nervously look away simultaneously

>same holiday
>at dinner again, might even have been the same night
>two 8/10 (actual 8s) sisters miring me and bro from the other side of the room
>keep making eye contact and all that shit
>parents later mention that they were surprised it look me this long to notice

brehs, i don't get it. i rarely catch girls miring IRL but my friends seem to tell me the same thing often enough. can't talk to the girls miring if i don't see em

oh and another one
>milk at my work but looks much younger
>its an outdoor labour job
>get hot in summer (been cutting) and we're working the same shift one day which is rather rare
>remove shirt
>she thinks i don't notice her staring because i have sunglasses on
>polish qt who works there too watches me pick up a box she wanted me to move and says "strong" in the sexiest slav accent imaginable

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I used to work at a place when a new hot girl joined. She was a solid 9-9.5/10, all of our work just became a game of "who-gets-to-fuck-this-girl-first". I was skinnier at the time and though I gave it a shot, she picked some other dude.

>~1.5 years of consistent lifting later
>I am now meaty and juicy compared to the lanky sperglord programmers we worked with
>going to a movie and hot girl is joining us
>we do shots on the second floor bar
>she notices my chest and asks to touch it
>I oblige
>she pushes and feels that it's solid muscle and not a bunch of water and fat like she was expecting
>"HOLY SHIT anon! wtf!"
>later during the movie she's sitting a couple seats away from me
>keeps reaching over past the dude between us to feel my chest and talking about how great it is
>10/10 best movie I didn't even give a fuck about the movie don't even remember what it was

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>>40953999
trips confirms

>>40954946
What kills me is that they are literally starving this kid, like Jesus imagine if he actually ate properly and did the exercises that I KNOW his doctor told him he should do.

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>>40948323
I believe it

>>40948385
Yea this isn't rejection. But good on ya

>>40950137
what the fuck, brah? get back in the bar and give us more stories. you don't have to act on any of them.

better yet - bring your wife to the bar and she can watch the other girls drool over you and then will want you more.

>>40946032
The fact that you're transferring should make you more likely to make a move, not less. Just fuck her until you have to transfer, and then you have an excuse to never have to talk to her again. It won't mess up your work environment either since you won't be there much longer anyway.

>>40948469
these faggot advising you to fuck your ex or arrange a FWB situation are gains goblins trying to live vicariously though you.

Don't do it. It's terrible. I made the mistake of hooking back up with an ex who really regretted breaking up, and begged me to come over for weeks. Thought I could just pump it and dump it, because lol wtf why not get free fuck. thought i was being a pussy for not doing it.

It will be an emotional drain on you, you will feel guilty, you will regret it.

>>40949741
You found me senpai.
Next time you see me in the lockerroom, I want you to dominate me.
Fuck me good.
If I ask to stop or scream, it's just for show.
Secretly I'm loving it.
I've been fantasizing about you for ages.
Whatever happens don't stop.

>>40952362
>gorgeous
>black
pick one

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>>40952362
>>Gorgeous black grill neighbor.

>black
>gorgeous

kys

>>40955241
I brought her in one time, and the same Brazilian/euro bitch from story one almost fucked me over she said some shit like "anooooon hey good to see you again" then looked at my wife and said "he comes in here alllll the time" wife was all like who the fuck is that bitch? And it caused a little drama afterwards. Wife is a petite A cup and self conscious about it (idgaf) so she thought I was trying to get at the bar what i can't get at home. Milf bartender totally knew what she was doing. I'll post another story In a sec, I gotta type them out and I'm on mobile. Posted this one before too

>>40955181
I'm in a similar position. I'm not sure if my dad is just teasing me or if they're actually happening. Sometimes when I go out with friends they say the waitresses are like smiling at me or some shit, but I'm still pretty fat/dyel by /fit/'s standards.

>>40955613
by /fit/'s standards frank zane is DYEL. you're doing good man.

>>40955346
>>40955383
Everyone has their own preferences.

>>40955633
Y-you too.

>>40955514
>At bar with another friend for his 21 birthday
>ordering pizza outside on phone because no food at bar
>ugly middle aged lady comes up to and ask if I got a light
>"nope don't smoke"
>"it's okay I found one". Lights her cig and then says "so what's your MOS"
>excuse me?
>oh come on your obviously a marine, look at u standing there all tall and muscular (this was before I bulked up)
>okay...
>giggles "sorry I work on the jewelry store on base, let me know if you need anything for your girlfriend... or girlfriendssss most likely huh? Come inside I'll buy you a drink
>cha-ching! in my head
>"what're you drinking?" I decide to push my luck and say patron
>"2 patrons and 2 budlight please"
>slam my drink say thank you and get up
>"wait wait wait don't leave yet how bout another round?"
>nother round of patron and bud light
>makes some chit chat turns out she's a sjw jew majored in women's studies of some shit
>drunk me starts debating her about rape statistics
>orders a few rounds for me
>"by the way is that your jeep outside? I knew it! It's rough and rugged just like you. I drive xyz truck do you wanna check it out?"
>go outside to look at her SUV
>"yea it's got xyz motor and tires" pops the back door open and gets in
>married me realizes what's going on decides to troll say "wow sweet anyhow it's my buddy's birthday I gotta get back..."
>"WAIT! wait how bout another round?"
>go inside she buys me 2 more rounds and my birthday friend some rounds too since he comes to see wtf
>"there's a big heavy box in my truck can you help me move it since your so big and strong"
>sure
>head outside and see her noticeably adjust her cleavage as she unlocks her doors
>"where's it at?"
>"uhhhh.... the backseat" giggle giggle
>dont take the bait throw door open and grab a case of arrowhead water "this it?"
>"ummm yes."
>"where do you want it"
>"oh uhhh well you can have it"
>k thanks
>walk to my jeep and throw it in the back and walk back towards bad
>cont

>>40955700
>she's all like wait how about another round
>head inside and get another round
>her friends come and grab her
>she's like no no it's fine I'm having a good time
>friend loudly says "holy shit anonette we've been waiting forever to go home, this guys not gonna fuck you in your car let's go already"
>asks for Bill
>over 100 dollars close to 200
>they leave
>kek drunkenly with my friend and tell him "happy birthday, on that lady"

He later threw the fuck up all over the parking lot and I dumped out a good portion of the case of water to rinse it off.

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>>40948197
>>40948267
thx for the advice anons, we're going for coffee on thursday

>>40948197
this. 'negging' and associated behaviour is trash and doesn't work, just a pitiful way for timid guys to try to appear alpha.

i always text girls the day after and they invariably respond well

why are captchas so fucking annoying these days

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>>40955346
die in a fire virgin fgt

>>40955732
Another one since I got nothing to do
>at same bar with friend from first story
>2 drunk probably barely 21 year old girls there dressed skimpy as shit
>being loud and scandalous as all fuck
>meanwhile having a conversation with my friend he mentions the word "overseas" in a sentence don't remember how
>"ooooooh are you a marine?"
>look her up and down and say nope
>"oooooh I heard you say overseas" sighs "my husband's a marine....... married at NINETEEN!" throws her hands in the air like sarcastically
>"yea I work in sales"
>"your sooo hawt" she blurts out and offers to buys me a round
>don't refuse it but do inform her I'm married
>sigh "yea me too, all the good ones are"
>goes to jukebox and plays Pillow Talk
>comes over and starts to chat me up tries to put hand on thigh
>brush her off
>"come on big boy I know you like it"
>song ends she goes and puts it on again
>comes back as I'm getting up to go play pool
>"can I play with you guys?"
>"buddy says naaaaah it's 1 on 1 we got a score to settle we tied last time." Buddy is total bro and never let's me even think about staying from my wife. God bless him
>"aaaw come on, you can stand behind me and teach me how to shoot"
>tell her no thanks
> she goes hmph! And walks back to the bar with her friend
>plays Pillow Talk all fucking night and grinds drunkenly on her friend feeling eachother up and making come here gestures
>were literally the only 4 people in the bar
>ignore them the whole night and leave
>not even my KV buddy wanted any of that action lol

Not really a mire, but it felt so fucking good.

Anyway, I live with these asian dudes and last year their sister moved in as well. Basically looks like a kpop qt. She has a boyfriend, who's this little skinny guy. Don't really like him.

>sitting at the table eating with her an one of her bros
>her brother starts talking fitness
>he ends up mocking her boyfriend for being puny
>her: "he's not that skinny.."
>him: "yeah he is, he's tiny"
>her: "he could have a body like anon if he lifted.."

Nah he couldn't but I was holding back my smirk so hard and staying out of it.

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>>40948837
>"I'm a faggot"

>>40955920
That bar sounds wack as fuck.

Sorta reminds me of stuff i used to do.
>Im straight
>Go to the bar with some buddies a lot
>they have some mutual friends that start going out with us for a while
>one of them is gay and always had a thing for my friend
>he knew it was never going to happen
>im new to his group so he starts talkin me up
>Next few times we go out, he buys me drinks and i just talk to him and let him keep going
>starts gettin physical but i turn that down
>next time we go out i introduce him to my gf and he has the worst look on his face

Felt kinda bad but i was poor so the drinks were nice, plus some attention didnt hurt.

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>>40955831
>black people hair lines

wtf is that?

>>40956111
That particular story was on like a Tuesday early evening so it was deserted. Bars usually pretty packed. I haven't been back in a minute though but now they have a DJ some nights and I heard it gets completely packed. All the more reason to not go

>>40953896

Most fedora response I have read on /fit/

>>40945581

Dude she's totally into you.

I know from experience that if a girls head is angled in such a way as to be within 90 degrees either side of the direction my head is angled that means she wants me and she wants me now.

>>40955383
>>40955346
>>>/pol/

>>40955783
You have me? I'm learning german and I don;t get that meme

>>40956231
it's a reference to a rammstein song anon, i just meant it as in "you're cool people"

>>40952173
>>40955220
Tbh she did not seem too eager to meet, but I don't care. Not succeeding is not as bad as I expected and for the first time I'm not bashing myself for not doing something or constantly thinking "what if", I've missed a lot.

>>40948086
>scared cat deadlift with fixed barbell
M Y S I D E S

>>40955920
Is that you Jodi??????

Are you in Yuma!?!?!?!?

>>40956382
Nope not Jody I'm active duty myself. Just lied to the dumb bitch. I'm in Orange county California

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>>40955831
>hottest black girl anon can find
>literal mulatto light-skin with white nose and features
>still 4/10 at best would not bang

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>be me, skinnyfat dyel with a good face
>sign up for gym membership one day
>get on treadmill
>this qt3.14 cardio bunny gets on the mill next to mine, when all the others are available
>she looks at me and smiles
>I'm jogging at the time
>look at her, my feet get all twisted and i trip
>fall and get launched off the treadmill at the speed of light, land halfway across room
>she laughs asks if i'm ok while covering her smile with her hand
>"y-yeah its all cool beans"
>wipe off my treadmill and leave even though I had only been there for 10 mins

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>>40956520
enjoy your racial purity memes and virgin bitterness while i
>betray my race
and slam thicc mulatto qts then anon

>>40950144
I only had a couple glasses of water that day. I caught up after the gym, no worries

>>40954925
My father is currently 70. His ex-wife, my mother, is 50. My sister is 12.

>>40955266
Yeah I don't intend to fuck, that's just drama

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>>40956597
lol. whatever you say, amigo.
remember to apologize to your sons

>>40946622
Prolonged eye contact isn't necessarily a sign of attraction, though.

3-5 seconds (optimal) and she looks away is a great sign. Wait another 10 seconds or so, if you notice her gazing your way then try to engage in eye contact again. If she does, smile at her. If she smiles back, you're basically good to go.

Anything more than 5 seconds could mean almost anything, unless of course if she earnestly smiles at you first. Anything beyond 8 seconds means she's just fucking with you or she wants to kill/eat you.

Also, don't eye rape a woman (esp. if you're not a Chad). You'll send them the creep vibes. Just act normal and be subtle about it.

t. eye sex expert

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>>40956639
imma give my sons the athletic benefits of 25% nignog genetics with 75% white intelligence, perfect mix

>>40945428
>>40950458
>>40951208
>Have actual gyno, especially bad in middle school
>Swimming unit for quarter in gym class
>Girls have to wear their two-piece swimsuit but guys have to be shirtless
>Can feel peoples' eyes on my chest at start of class, no doubt laughing
>At on point am paired up in groups to do relay racing
>The one girl of the group keeps eyeing me and quickly looking away when I notice
>Eventually flat out asks me, dead-eyed
>"Are you actually a girl or something?"
>Didn't understand what she meant at the time because autism
>"Huh?"
>"N-never mind..."
>Get home later that day, in my room doing homework when I finally realize what she meant
>Wide eyes
>Get so furious and self conscious that for a brief moment, the idea flashes through my head to go a get the kitchen knife downstairs and slice the excess fat off
>Luckily wasn't so retarded that I actually did it

I had the last laugh though, the girl that said that to me was completely flat chested, loose-leaf pale skin and you could see her gross ribcage through her swimsuit. At least I've mostly gotten rid of my problem

pls gib me ebin screencap

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>>40956679
>t. eye sex expert

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>>40956682
>white intelligence
>posts nigger who got famous for his mugshot
top kekarooni

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>>40944953

>wear tanktop to college party
>girl refers to me as "big arms guy"
>dyel af

feels good desu senpai

not making good progress on lifts tho, still skelly af

>Be me working out at 8am as usual.
>Me and 3 cardio bunnies in gym
>Only person not on treadmill.
>Finish sets
>Look over at bunnies
>They all marine, notice me look over at them while they look at me.
>MFW they all get whip lash from looking away so fast

>>40947941
ahahaha i dont get it

>>40956679

How do I have eye sex??

I want to learn how to pickup a woman in a real environment but I'm mildly autistic. Fuck tinder, it's all shit.

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How do I tell the difference between "qt eyeing me because I'm making gains" and "qt eyeing me because I'm still kinda fat?"

Like, is there a number where after she looks X many times it becomes mirin for sure?

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>>40956571
>motherfucker can't even walk and look at a girl at the same time.

Better stick to one thing at a time from now on.

>>40956880
Look at them and smile. You'll get a feel for who's into you and who's not.

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>>40956571
>"y-yeah its all cool beans"

>>40956819

boner

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>>40956890
I feel like most people smile when they make eye contact just to be polite though

>>40956955
What I'm telling you is that if you smile, depending on their facial and body language you'll start to figure out who likes you and who doesn't. Literally just pattern recognition. Go out and do it.

>>40945736
3pl8 is hard. what side do you put the 3rd plate on? i tried my right because i thinks my right side is stronger but the bar just tips heavy to that side and i have to drop it.

>>40956231
it's a play on words

switches meaning between have and hate in the song

>>40957163
you snap the pl8 in half and stick one half to one said and the other half to the other using your extra protein semen.

>>40947108
no, but that old man has been hitting that back of his!

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>>40956682
>posts mugshot

yeahhhh

>>40944953
BRANDON

YOU

CANT

POST

HERE IF YOURE STILL FUCKING FAT

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>>40957298
Your friend Brandon has a fine eye for qts

I guess I got a few.
Before I started dating my current gf
>go with best bro from high school to eat with his parents and their friends at a bar and grill in town
>Plan on just sitting by his pool later and just drinking because it's now summer and back from college
>Eat with everyone, and bro and I leave bar and grill to back to his house
>While leaving parking lot, girl stops his truck to talk to us
>she's a good 6.5-7 or so, butter face really.
>"Hey,my friend saw you and your friend leaving and thought he was really hot, can she have his number?"
>uhhh, I don't even know what this girl looks like
>Sure I suppo-
>Girl comes up, a good 8.5, but she had a lot of make up on
>Hey! What are you fellas up to?
>Chat for a little bit, she asks how old we are
>Bro is 22 and I was 21 at the time and tell them "No you're not! You have to be younger."
>Tell them we really are, my friend is 6'4 with a beard going on so I don't know how they thought he was younger. Girls turn out to be 24/25.
>Invite them over to swim.
>They come over and 8.5 starts hanging all over me, trying to get me to make out with her.
>8.5 has at the minimum double d size tits, but hadn't worked out in a while it seemed.
>Just didn't want to initiate that soon and play it off and flirt around
>Eventually we have another bro come over and we all end up back at 8.5 place with a case of beer to drink while playing cards
>Talk to her while she smokes on her patio, spilling out her life story and complimenting how muscular I am, feeling me from time to time.
>Best bro pulls the "Man I'm tired. I'll catch ya later." and both bros leave. 8.5's friend is passed out on the couch.
>8.5 "Hey you want to go to bed?"
>Sure thing
>End up fucking her,but I had to pee and I was retarded and didn't so I didn't finish. Got her to fully orgasm by just playing with her dd tits.

Still had sex, only thing was that she was way too clingy way too fast and smoked like 4 cigs then proceeded to make out with me.

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>talking with girlie
>she is touching my arms/shoulder/back quite a bit
This has happened with multiple women, are they trying to escalate? Should I touch them back?

>>40948115
anyone have the pic with 4 quadrants summarizing this copypasta?

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>>40957369
Another when I first met my gf
>meet her through my best bro and tinder too
>she comes over to hang out with us and swim with another mutual friend of ours
>Meet her for the first time. Try to play it cool, she's pretty hot in person
>She is shy and was hard to talk to at first
>She kept staring at me all day that day when I was just in my swimming trunks. Eventually hit it off that day.
>Fast forward to later when we were dating
>Tells me she was so nervous that she went into the bathroom with mutual chick friend, that her hands were shaking and found it hard to breathe
>Chick friend had to drag her into bro's house because she was to nervous to come in
>Sneaked a picture of me that day to her cousin who is a fitness chick and she has it in for me still to this day because "I am exactly her type of guy"
>Actually compliments me every time we are together about my physique, which is great.

Also,
>go to Florida for spring break few weeks ago
>go to beach were everyone is partying
>girls in our group obviously go and talk to some black football players to get free drinks
>they all come back, we all talk
>football players ask me if I play any sports at my school
>nah I just lift
>"Shiiitt your quads are fucking huge. How much do you squat?? I mean no homo man but damn!"

So I reached a new height of d1 college starting football players complementing my physique now.
>FeelsgoodIguess.jpg

>>40948263
you sound like a fucking retard. California is full of jackasses like you.

>>40957369
wait, they were 24/25 and hoping that you were younger than 22?

>>40957529
Phrased it wrong I suppose.
No, they thought we were younger than that.

>>40957493
breh i'm jelly. sounds awesome

>>40957626
It's nice sometimes. Good ego boost, but it honestly feels weird to hear though.

>>40947670
I found that (for me) you have to want it for yourself, not others, the mirin and shit is extra

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>>40953873

>>40952362
are you autistic? explaining that you're working on something and it's putting you in an antisocial mood would be better than just being a dick.

>>40948086

Well meme'd. Some people just progress faster and have done sports before going to the gym so their start with almost 2pl8 max in bench.

>>40949461
She probably just matched to see if you would.

>stay at parent's home during college break
>one day my younger sister brings her bestfriend to stay overnight
>they're both stacy type normies and in senior high
>they invite me to play jenga with them
>"sure why not"
>during the game I stood up and stretched my chest
>tfw sister's friend says "You look like superman" and smiles flirtingly

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>on a work trip in Chicago.
>go to smallish 3rd floor gym in the financial district
>24hr pass
>around 20 dyel
>look down and shake my head
>spot all four lanklets
>go up to them individually
>hover near them and stare them down
>they usually awkwardly say something along the lines of "do you need something" in a soft tone
>jolt my upper body at them and watch them flinch
>smirk and look down shaking my head again
>one of them complains
>female desk lady tells me I'm being distracting and have to leave
>tell her I don't know where the exit is
>she grumbles and grabs my 'cep as she leads me to the door
>I can feel one of her fingers rubbing all the way there
>opens the door and tells me to have a good day
>making it

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>walking my dog
>see a short, thicc qt walking around the neighborhood
>walk by, we both smile and say hello
>proceed to spend the next 30 minutes both trying to intentionally run into one another but awkwardly being too far away
haven't seen her since
>it's been like a week

I missed the chance of a lifetime. She was trying really hard to find ways to be in the same place as me, even autistic me could tell.

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Not really a mire, but somehow it was better

>Work as a bank teller
>Am always friendly with customers and am very nice all around
>There is an old asian couple who don't have the best english but are very nice people so I always talk with them
>Saved their account from a check fraud guy once too, and alerted them
>Have known them for about 3 months, they typically come in about once a week
>The older man comes in one day and asks for my personal phone number
>He seems harmless, but as a rule, I generally don't give out my personal phone to clients
>I ask him what it is, and tell him that he can just ask me here
>He tells me that he has a grand niece who works for a bank too and would love for us to have dinner together sometime
>I have to tell him that I'm already with someone since I already have a qt3.14 asian gf
>Feel a little bad because if I didn't have my gf, I would definitely have taken him up on his offer
>See him again a week later
>Everything is well, and there's no hard feelings
>Tfw this man was ready to offer his granddaughter to me

>>40952528

Underrated

>>40948181
fucking kek'd

>>40948323
I don't have enough fedoras in one picture to post.

This is faker than santa clause

>>40958006
What's so outrageously unbelievable about it

>>40950699
She is not going to think it is funny and will end up thinking you're going to cheat on her or leave her for the friend. Don't do this shit.

>In a mmf threesome.
>Start undressing because it's time to get down to business
>Other dude starts blatting about my ottermode physique for five minutes
>No homo

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>>40957190

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>>40948086
>cat doing deadlifts
oh boy

>>40956216
>being a faggot
>>>/mlp/

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>>40946874
>in good shape for a natty lifter his age; he's been lifting for 30 years

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>>40956685
you didn't get the last laugh, you turned down a qt3.14 due to autism
>"Are you actually a girl or something?"
she obviously was a closeted lesbian and wanted your D while pretending you are a girl

>>40955192
imagine having dj kahled next to you saying another one after each rep