Help /fit/

Holy shit dude that's alpha as fuck if true. Don't worry about it. A fucking mugger isn't going to press charges if he wakes up alive. If he's dead he'll have a weapon in hand and if you turn up in investigation it will be easy to explain.

>>39884899
Don't sweat over some filthy sub-human. Well, easy to say but my point is nobody will be missing that prick. You did right in my eyes

>>39884899
nice man. That's why I carry a pencil. You can stab a cunt easily

>>39884899
literally the definition of self defence
if you're that worried go tell the police (snitch)

>>39884899
I mean, if this really happened, you wouldn't write about it here now would you?

I'd tell the police if that really happened. It was self defence.

>>39884941
(snitch)

I guess you anons are right, desu I went here to read what I want to hear, been staying up all night all paranoid and shit, I didnt like how it felt, and it may have been self defense but I dont want him to actually die though, think he died in that blow?

>>39884899
i think its laws that you should tell the police when shit like this happens so yeah

This reminded me of my old boxing days

>trained as an early professional prospect boxer
>honed my skills 24/7 literally
>ate lightning crapped thunder
>was literally compared to Mike Tyson
>if Iron Mike could dish out 5-6 combinations in a second, I could do 7
>there were people who said I had the potential to even best prime kid dynamite on a good day
>when I say I could kill people with my barehands, I LITERALLY mean I could kill you with a basic combo of 1-2
>be one night walking home
>always have to pass this dark alley where a homeless huge ass nigger squats
>as I passed him he stood up
>my fighting instincts know whats about to happen
>I could feel my adrenaline pumping, my muscles tensing, my mind vigilant and my breathing heavy
>I knew it was time to fucking show my skills on the streets
>literally felt like Achilles
>"Why kill you now, Prince of Troy, with no-one here to see you fall?"
>combo of 7-5-6-5 repeated all over my mind, one, two, three.. fifteen times
>Nigger started to whisper "hey man, I dont want no trouble, just give me your phone and wallet, I dont want to hurt you"
>turn around with a smirk on my face
>see he has a knife
>implying
>with a grin, I said to this behemoth "Lets see how you fare against a marine"
>sad look on the nigger's face, probably scared
>Ape then patted me on the back mumbling "temper fly, brother'" then started laying down on his usual spot
>mfw I talk-no-jutsu this weird ass faggot
>mfw I dont even marines
>fucking called the cops on that pussy
>never saw that pathetic squatter ever again

>>39884961
no.
I believe most people die from punches when they fall with their head on concrete, not from the actual punch so idk how he felt.
I mean some people have 1 punch k.o., some even might have 1 punch DEATHBLOW but I don't believe you do (even in the fucking carothide)

>>39884955
:( not in the face please Tony

>>39884952
>>39884966
How do I do it lads? if he died wouldnt there be an open investigation or something? should I just go to the cops and surrender? How do I do this? i dont want to ask around as I'm a panicky faggot

>>39884973
thats good to hear I guess, if that were the case, I should probably avoid the same alley right?

>>39884994
Just call your mom that you just killed a man

>>39884967

not funny

>>39884899
Jesus christ you retard

If this actually happened and someone was actually trying to rob you, that isba CRIME that should be reported to the POLICE

The fact that you defended yourself against a CRIME is nothing to sperg out about. But NOT reporting the crime that was attempted on you makes you look stupid.

So go to the cops today, tell them what happened, when and where, describe the perp as best you can, so if he is still alive maybe they catch him before he tries this on someone else. If thwy ask why you didnt call them right away say you were shaken up and unable to think straight after such a wild encounter (i.e. the truth)

>>39885025

fkin snitch

>>39885025
apologies man, i think im pussying out man, im twitchy and all, so yes I think I sperged and still sperging, I'd go down to the station once i've calmed down a bit, heres to hoping hes not dead.

sorry man, i kind of freaked out, I thought the chances of people getting put in life and death situations are in the 1%s similar to getting hit by lightning or something

>>39885025
This is the best answer. Maybe talk to a lawyer of you know one just to be doubly safe, but you should be fine.

The best thing you can do is literally forget about the experience and do not contact the police. Noting is going to happen to you. you are scared as fuck pussy holy shit whats wrong with you

>>39884899
>>39885025
ffs don't talk to the cops unless you have talked to a lawyer first.

>>39884899
dont worry about op, he was just a nigger anyways

>>39885114
>pay some jew $2500 just to tell me its ok to go to the cops

Fuck off

>>39885055
I wouldn't worry about it. You could report it, but even if you don't, you can just assume that he survived, it's not like you tried to kill him. If he shows up dead and police ask questions, tell them what happened.

>>39885129
Ok, go in an sperg like you did in the alleyway. Say whatever you want. It's not a cop's job to arrest people for assault, and it's not like they won't try to fuck you, and it's not like the guy you're reporting on won't have a lawyer. Hope you're white.

Go to the closest police station and ask them a hypothetical question.
>Just asking: what if I punched a guy in the throat in self defense, would that be illegal?

>>39885164
is it though?

>>39884899
if i was you id worry about the guys revenge if he survives desu, maybe go to the police

>>39885174
I don't know. That's why you should ask the police a """"hypothetical"""" question.