ITT: people you see at the gym

>that guy who goes to the gym to do calisthenics

ur mum

>that roided out guy that wears the same dirty stringer every single day

>that guy who comes to the gym, squats, then leaves


I guess if you're only gonna do 1 exercise he picked a good one

>the guy who shaves at the gym Locke room

>That guy who loads 3 pl8s up and only does half squats

>5% shirt
>30%, 230lbs

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>mfw OP sees me at the gym and calls me out on /fit/

>the guy that has mantits

jesus christ man I guess no one told him that diet is important

>>38839240
>that grill who walks on the treadmill for10 minutes then leaves.

>that naked old man just chilling in the locker room

>>38839240
That guy who looks like a flabby DYEL, then deadlifts 4pl8 next to your 1.5pl8

That guy that steals 1 of every single dumbbell to do concentration curls

>the guy that you never see wearing shorts for obvious reasons

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>that guy that stares at himself in the mirror doing curls for 30 minutes

"hey, how many more you got on that?"

>proceeds to stand next to you and stare at you the entire time

>that guy that comes in EVERY single day and does the exact same routine

>that guy who hogs four pieces of equipment at once for his super sets

fuck you

>that guy who jacks your equipment 5sec after you leave to refill water bottle

fuck you

>>38839370
>that guy who leaves a bench open without leaving anything on it to claim it and then wants it back

>the tall blonde with the amazing ass that walks around but never really does any working out
>the incredibly fit girl wearing a bane mask on the stairmaster for 2 hours
>the 3 asian dyels just standing around making fun of each other and not lifting

>>38839285
I know that girl but shes hella cute so I dont mind

>that guy who jacks you off 5sec after you leave to refill water bottle

>that DYEL trying to become a fitness youtuber with a camera guy filming his babby lifts

>anyone in the gym that isn't me

i actually don't recognize anybody lol, my brain doesn't store faces in memory

the only dude i remember having seen more than once is the buff azn guy who squats 4 pl8s

>>38839258
Fuck this guy. Also the nail clippers.

>that guy who uses the private changing room in the locker room

>>38839240
>that guy that counts out loud

Am I the only one?

>creepy old man
>watches young girls work out
>tries to talk to them between sets

>>38839474
Doesnhe try and sell you a red drink

>that guy that you know browses /fit/

>>38839504

The guy that talks to himself
"Cmon baby"
"YOU GOT THIS CMON"
"TSSSSSST...ahhh...TSSST"
"One more one mooooore"

>>38839312
small calf syndrome is a serious thing bro don't mock

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>>38839504
>that guy that trains in casual clothing

Pretty sure it is one of you guys. fucker is autistic won't make eye contact with anybody and is pudgy to say the least. He is wearing pic related with normal shoes and a t-shirt. Hair is a mess like he didn't wash it for a month. He is following his buddy around that actually does talk to people. Meanwhile this guy stands behind him looking at the ground.

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That guy who shows up 10 minutes before the gym closes everynight and does a few random sets, flexes his abs in the mirror and leaves.

>>38839513

wat no

>>38839295

Das me

>>38839548

every night*

>>38839505
Fun thing is that they are not ashamed about it. Yesterday I saw a old dude checking this girl out that was doing lat pulldowns. He just kept staring at her.

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mfw im benching 1 pl8 tonight on SS

Los Mexicanlets
>4 dudes that are all barrel shaped and short and Mexican, thought they were all one guy till I saw them all at once
Chad
>I imagine the dude has puss on tap, because he has height face and frame.
>Once I failed a bench, had to roll of shame, he came up and before he said anything I told him I was done with the rack, he just said to feel free to ask for a spot in the future.
>Gave him a y-you too and fled
Chest bro
>Legit best pics I ever seen, wears skinny tank to show it. Good shoulders, ok arms, legs smaller than arms
Gym bully
>55+ lady does stupid body weight and rubberband shit in the weight area but in the walking path, not the workout part, never yields gets too close with jump rope, reee we have a different area for this get out

>>38839240
>that girl that has two friends spotting her lmao0.25pl8bench at the power rack despite flat benches being free
You ruined my workout yesterday

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>>38839560
wtf, why are you correcting my post?

I don't know man, but doesn't it seem like some people do absolutely nothing at the gym?

>that old guy hogging the machine while lifting 10lbs on it

>>38839285
I go to the gym with this girl
She then does 10 minutes of the crosstrainer
Followed by 7 half reps on the bicep curl machine

I'm not going to tell her until she's ready to hear the truth though

>>38839573
kek

wtf

>>38839513
>>38839552
Mike Chang pls

>>38839474
Dat faceblind life

>that guy who benches in the power cage
>that guy who rows in the squat rack
>that guy who supersets using three barbells
>that guy who does pullups in the power cage
>that guy who does pushups in front of the dumbbells
>that guy who does military press in the squat rack and then winces from shoulder pain
>that guy who goes to the deadlifting platform and curls the empty barbbell
>that guy who amasses two dozen clips at his power cage
>that guy who supersets his supersets with cardio and trips to the vending machine
>that fucking guy

>That bitch that takes 4 sets of dumbbells to do pushups while sitting on a yoga ball

>>38839263
Does /fit/ consider going to parallel "half squats"?

>>38839240
>that guy who says he's been working out for 3 years
>mfw I look my muscles are bigger and more defined than his
>mfw I've been lifting everyday for 4 months now

>>38839336
That's me.

>>38839738
>>that guy who does military press in the squat rack and then winces from shoulder pain
>>>that guy who rows in the squat rack
Me IRL.

My gym has only one squat rack and zero power racks, what the fuck else am I supposed to do

>>38839240
>that guy who looks just like you

>>38840022
>lifting everyday

Do people seriously do this natty?

>>38840008
a *full* squat is precisely when the glutes at least touch the floor, so going to parallel is, in fact, half squatting

>>38839336
What do you do when that guy is in a wheelchair

>that chick wearing transparent leggings

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>vato comes in every day around 3 pm
>bench presses 280x10 with perfect form
>overhead presses just under 200 pounds with perfect form
>does lat pull downs fucking 250 pounds X 10
>leaves
>he's only 5'7" and wears a fucking flannel during all of it

>>38840071
pic from a week ago
SxLC&BxLxAxHCxD
still in fratboy mode tho

>that guy that wears a bandana and looks at you every time you're there

>>38839240
almost me
>tfw you are stuck at 1,5 plate for probably over a year because your training time is just enough to keep the amount of muscle you have

I'll admit I have gone to the gym on my lunch break wearing work clothes (slacks, polo, and dress shoes) and have gotten in a few reps on the bench or some chin ups.

I'm not autistic, just have a jam packed schedule with work, school, girlfriend, hobbies, etc.

>>38840179
Wtf that sounds like a personal problem

>>38840129
That pimp as fuck. He doesn't have time for faggy Nike shit. He come in, gets strong as fuck, then leaves.

Probably to go smoke a blunt and fuck his hot Latina girl.

This guys a goddamn war hero.

that guy running away from a 1 ton dinosaur

>>38840077
I always squat ass below grass.

>>38839352
If you're not on it, it's mine.

>>38839543
literally me

>>38840077

to be more precise, it's when your hamstrings touch your calves. you glutes may or may not touch the floor at this point, depending on body proportions.

>>38839348
I do this, what's wrong with this?

>>38840262
>tfw you excavate a hole after every squat set

>that semi-old guy who knows the name of every single person in the gym and spends more time socializing than exercising

>>38840418
I fucking hate that guy

That very attractive 18 year old girl and her less attractive friend who go to the weight room to just touch weights to see how heavy they are, giggle, take instagram photos and gawk.

GET THE FUCK OUT REEE

>>38839380

>that guy who leaves plates on the bar and leaves for at least five minutes and as soon as you step in he magically reappears and complains hes still using it

Its always the same guy. What the fuck are you leaving and doing for that long you asian fuck.

>>38840008
The dude I'm talking about doesn't go anywhere near parallel

>that old guy who commandeers a bench or lackadaisically peddles on a bike because he's really just there to watch the game

That girl that keeps eyeballing you but you're too scared to talk to her because you're a beta pussy bitch. :(

> that old cuck who lifts lmao.5pl8 who tries to work in

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>>38840096

>that one guy you who initially mistake for a fat slob trying to lose weight but it turns out he's a veteran who can bench 3pl8

yesterday a middleaged fatdude tried to strike up a conversation while i was planking

>>38840179
Lol

>that woman in the yoga pants who does 10 pound one arm rows in front of everybody

>>38840841
>that helicopter-faggot who's always wanting to use only YOUR gym equipment because he's a faggot
That's you.

>>38840195
Do you really not have an extra half hour in the day you fucking queer? Apparently you have enough time to /shitpost/

>that guy who literally doesn't look like he lifts at all squatting 3 pl8
>never see him do any upper body exercise

>walks naked around the locker room after showering

>>38840089
tell him to fuck off because I'm squatting

>>38841463
How long did it take him to cum when u blew him in that position?

>that guy who hasn't gotten any bigger in half a year because he's stayed at 160 lbs the entire time

its me

>>38839295
Lel thats pretty much me except I am skinny af ottermode, my only good lift is deadlift

Started 5x5

it's only been 1 month...
But this is all worthy, right /fit/?
I'll be able to lift heavy weights in 2 or 3 more months, right fit?
I'll be able to do lots of reps 5 times a week, right?

I'll have a hot as fuck body in a year, right? ;_;

>>38839312
I'm just hiding my powerlevel, one day I will come in with shorts and you guys will be miring dem legs

>>38840866
this is me except i'm 24

>>38839609
Wtf*
nothing personnel kid...

>>38841560
No, retard. People who claim to hit 1/2/3/4 and be 170lbs <10% bf in 6 months are lying.

>>38839295
Your deadlift is sad

>>38839240
This guy was power cleaning 95# with really shitty form yelling the whole time and dropping the weights after each set

>That horseshoe bald guy who pulls a comb out of his pocket to use after every lift where his head touches something

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>>38839240
>That 40 year old manlet that does curls for 45 minutes with 3 different pieces of equipment.

>>38841652
No shit?

>>38841844
Yeah this faggot sat on the bench while curling I politely told him to fuck off

And he looks like Costanza only a couple inches taller

> That Asian girl who weighs like 80lb but squats lamo2pl8

>that guy who does seated overhead press in the squatrack for 45 minutes
Fuck you.

>That 50 year old man who wears new balance shoes, high white socks, wears lifting gloves and a tank top, uses only the rowing machine, curls, or does cardio.

I fucking hate this dude. That's all I ever see him do, and he always stares at me too. Not in a mirin' way, but in a "I am better and stronger than you" kind of way even though he is 160 lbs and has a bf percentage of probably 30.

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>the group of 10-20 people who come in and take over all four squat racks, bags and foam rollers everywhere

>the skinny chick who comes in does nothing but lightweight squats/kickbacks and asks all the black guys to "check her form"
(they all know to avoid getting with that)

>the old, round guy(not in shape) who does very Loud/bad form obnoxious Olympic lifts....FOR 3 HOURS

>the guy who takes a squat rack, box(box jumps), 2 barbells, 2 sets of dumbbells, ez curl bar and >>>>>>>6<<<<<<<<< weight clips.

>the short qt who warms up with my max

>the big guy who asks for a spot on his 3pl8 bench and needs "assistance" on every rep (as in I'm trying to awkwardly dead-lift off of his chest for 5x5)

>pic related

>>38839240
>guy who jogs on the spot on his toes between sets and has huge calves
>that group of freshers that come in to juat do biceps and abs
>that one dude whos a taller swoler version of you and goes in during the same times
>that guy in the spiderman themed compression gear who only does bodyweight

>That guy who flashes zyzz poses at the mirror

If you read this you're a huge bald faggot.

>>38839285
But first she do warm up by doing social media on her phone for 15 min, on the treadmill

>>38839263

When tested, a quarter squat program produced better outcomes in mass gained, max weight, and vertical leap than a full depth program.

>>38841560
>I'll have a hot as fuck body in a year, right? ;_;

Yeah, year 2018. And even then it's a maybe unless you roid.

>>38839548
Das me. Gotta get them last sets in, especially on a friday - uni gym is closed on the weekend.

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>>38843135

>The guy who masterbates on the bench press

>>38843135
Ok pussy

>that guy who only uses cables and dumbbells and makes the barbell area less crowded
Thanks guy

>>38839257
Tfw I was busy on one day so I only had time to squat

> Trainer with middle-aged client who looks exactly the same as they did when they started a year ago
> Takes up a power rack to do kettlebell fuckabouts for 90 minutes

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>>38839240
>>38839245
>>38839285
>>38839312
>>38839326
>>38839459
>>38839505
>>38840096
>>38841844
also:
That ""coach"" who watches you fuck up your form with heavy lifts, and don't even care about how bad you could hurt ys.

Maybe you can't relate to this one, but that hambeast of a coach of my gym kindda enjoy watching me destroing my back... It's smells like personal revenge to me

>>38839738
>that guy who benches in the power cage

me irl because I work out alone and prefer to bench with safety bars instead of asking any combination of retards for a spot

>>38840047
you snap the bar up from the floor

>>38840047
Same here bro don't worry
You're not alone

>>38839240
new gym so I've yet to see all the wonders that populate it
but
>70+ year old guy benching 2.5pl8 with a bench shirt
>old guy talking to absolutely everyone and giving weightlifting advice
>that fucking chad curling in the squat rack
>that guy who uses great form and heavy weights on all lifts
>grils doing nothing but every imaginable dumb ass exercise

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>>38839240

>mfw you might be someone from my gym
>mfw I realize I am worthy to be made fun of

>>38839514
every skelly doing deadlifts you mean?

>that guy that bench presses 1pl8 in the only. fucking. squat rack

if you can't bench your body weight without a spotter, you're better off doing push ups

>>38845579
>that guy who's been lifting so long he forgot what its like to be a beginner

Truly the faggiest of faggots

>>38841536
130lbs here, kill me

>>38845202
Just do dumbbell press you fag

>>38840008
the ipf doesn't, and that's what matters, not some autists round here mate.

>the guy who sips water after each set

>>38843038
Fuck you, Gregg

>>38845864
no. there are 4 power racks and one bench. they're not your designated squatting racks, I got there first and no you can't work in you'll have to move the safeties everytime fuck off and learnt to wait

>that guy who is pretty big and tall but always does the most unimpressive lifts and seems to have a completely random routine
>he never does bench, squat, dl, or OHP

>>38841560
2-3 months your lifts won't be big, but they won't be pathetic. like, 60-80kg bench, 90-110 squat, 120-150 dl, 40-60 ohp as long as you're eating and sleeping right, going by my experience, and I experienced pretty shit progress too, you could probably even expect better.

reading SS and practical programming would do you a world of good, it's so much better than the broscience you'll get on here.

>>38846039
sounds like your average roider really.

>that guy who uses a portable blowtotch to toast marshmellows between sets
>that guy who enthusiastically greets you with the wrong name and slaps you on the back super hard. You haven't corrected him. It's been 8 months.
>that chick who just stands around making helicopter noises
>that guy who carefully arranges a blanket and pillow under the smiths machine, gets on the bench, under the pillow then goes to sleep.
>That married couple who keep having really heated arguments neat to the only water dispenser so you can't get water.
>Those two fucking kids who just do curls and bench while talking as loudly as possible about dianabol.
>That old guy who keeps having a heart attack nect to you and slumping over you as you try to do back rows.
>That retard who comes in with a paintbrush and 'paints' everyone and all the equipment with it while his carer just sits on a bench and browses intragram on his phone.
>that dog that doesn't seem to belong to anybody.

>>38845968
That's me. Why is that bad?

>the 40 year old special needs dude that chugs two 40oz's before the gym

tfw uni gym in september
>one asian benching the bar, the other rowing it
>that one fivehead girl who knows what she's doing
>quarter squats, quarter squats everywhere
>old dudes who've been watching & have some semblance of what to do
my personal favourite
>1-2pl8 mixed grip deadlifts

>>38846170
Let me guess, you also have never taken a girl from the gym out on a date.

>>38846355
well, no.

>>38841560
Doing 5x5 3 days a week I went from a pathetic 135 squat to 215 in about 2.5 months

Still not great but the improvement feels amazing. Just keep at it and eat right, you'll make it

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>that guy that steals your bench when you are literally seconds away from it

FUCK OFF

>>38843135
This is like the 3rd time I've heard this.
Is there something behind it? Why do I keep hearing the same thing?

Even if it's true would anyone try it? Idk if I could for fear of someone seeing me do a quarter squat

>>38839240
>tfw only went form lmao1pl8x5 to 175x5 in 4 months
I'm working on it, okay?

>>38846167
kek

>>38843135
Those 'tests' compared a shitty program to another shitty program.

kys

>that guy who benches less than a pl8

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>that qt that comes 3 times a week to use treadmill and do hip abductions every single time.

Turns out it's a guy,
Tfw still interested even tho I'm not/never been homo

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>that guy who works out with his gf

>>38841560
A full body transformation, without roids, takes 2 years.

Two bulks and two cuts can get you to where you want to be. If you can stick with your programs and eat right you can put on 25-30lbs of LEAN mass in a year. Dont give up anon.

>>38845235
This. I just tried power cleans today for the first time and getting up my weight for working sets on the press is easy as shit. I can only imagine increasing it the more I train the movement.

>>38845305
>that guy who uses great form and heavy weights on all lifts
I have this guy in my gym. He's a 5'6 manlet, has his headphones in and never talks to anyone. Whenever I have to ask him how many sets he has left or if I can use the spare barbell on his rack, he seems friendly enough but slightly autistic having problems with speaking up loud enough to understand it and phrases his sentences in a weird way.

>>38840047
everyone presses in the squat rack. you won't be able to do your best if you just had to clean right before the set.

doing rows is unnecessary though, just do it on a dl platform or any free space in the gym

I've started training October 2015, stopped in March and restarted in July but I only started doing Stronglifts this week. These are my stats:
SQ 94 / BP 110 / ROW 66 / OHP 83 / DL 121

>Tfw I'm not going to make it.

>>38839240
>that guy about the same size as you who more or less lifts the same weight

>>38846947

that's me

>>38846170
It's a noob catcher meme. Everyone knows you're supposed to drink water during your workout but people who haven't been frequenting /fit/ for a long time don't recognize it's just a meme.

>those guys from
Class that you dont want to talk to but they talk to you in hopes you help them.

I have limited time, i wana do
My shit then leave,
Please dont bother people at the gym. If they want to be friendly let them come
To you

>>38846167
That's pretty good

>>38846947
you just described me....

you in MA?

>that skelly who tells me he's on a cut

>That guy who deadlifts 4 plates but spends 10 minutes resting between each set

>>38847021
Why did you write this post like it was some kind of poetry/you were having a stroke

>>38847043
"I just want abs bro"

>>38847034
Nah, yurofag.

>that guy who's barely able to deadlift 2.5 plates and rests a solid 3-5 seconds between each rep
It's me.

>that manlet mexican who never cleans up after himself, leaves weights all over, has terrible form, and brings his kids with him to the gym
>that skinnyfat dude who thinks he's shredded who wears all this spandex bodytight stuff
>that fat guy who can't do 1pl8 anything and complains that his cut is ruining his gains

I'm surprised nobody has said it yet...

>Smelly Asians
>Asian people and their friends who sit on one machine for a good half hour or so watching girls/talking about how they're going to "pull" in the gym.

>that guy who does his warm up reps really quickly so nobody thinks he's weak

>tfw I've been shittily working out since 2013 and still can't bench a full plate

>that one actually autistic guy who comes in at the same time on the same days and does the exact same routine every time and if he can't use a machine in a certain order has to go home but doesn't get any bigger because he doesn't do any compound lifts so still looks DYEL and sometimes shouts "HOWZEE?" at you randomly and you just nod and say scraic back but who everyone else thinks is weird
>that weird middle aged guy who does really memey exercises like pushups on pl8s in the hope that someone asks what he is doing because he really just wants to talk to someone because his wife died
>that guy who wears really loose boxers and shorts and has a really big dick and does cardio knowing full well what everyone is staring at
>that girl who squats more than most of the lads who always goes at the same time as you and spends almost the whole time stretching in various poses that push her ass right in your face
>the two secondary school kids who come in slacks and shirts and do curls and let the DBs fall loudly to the floor when they are done
>that really fat guy who goes at 6 a.m. with you most days and who although you never talked to hope makes it because he seems dedicated and nice
>that mother who brings her 10 year old son and spends the hour in the gym but opts against exercising and just reads and plays on her phone for the hour
>your friends who always ask why you don't go gym with them and why you go at 6 a.m.and can't understand why you would want to avoid people

>>38847312
>Smelly Asians

what? (east) asians are the least smelly people at my gym.

>>38847057
Eh,if he can diddly 4 plates it's ok I guess

>>38847312
>>38847650
I think he meant the bongland definition of Asian. Pakis and Poo in loos

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>>38847609
>that weird middle aged guy who does really memey exercises like pushups on pl8s in the hope that someone asks what he is doing because he really just wants to talk to someone because his wife died
I didn't expect this feel.

>>38843519
you work out for 10 mins a night?

>>38839240
>that girl who bought Jenna Jameson tier tits

Looks fucking weird, the rest of her body is petite.

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I had a faggot in my gym the other day squatting with 35s on each side, GRUNTING as loud as he could every rep. he was dyel as fuck and decked out in full... idk what to call it fitness gear? like cardio shit.

he was even grunting doing leg extensions and was probably 140 lbs. fucking Cringe everyone was looking at him and shaking there head.

>That old guy that does like 20 sets of legextentions

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>That annoying horde of teenagers who're buddies, talking, yelling and laughing like a hyena pack, occupying everywhere

I hate you, lil faggots.

>that guy who goes and takes smoke breaks between sets and expects nobody to work in or touch his weights while he smokes

what the fuck is this

>>38839548
>that guy who goes to a gym that closes

>>38846469
Of course it yields higher max weight. You're doing an easier exercise.

>that guy who doesn't tip the front desk

Any tips on going from one plate to two plate? It feels like its so far away. Currently just adding a little bit of weight everytime. But its going to take a very long time at that rate. I never really see anyone, other than the freaks bench two plates though.

>>38840051
That's a mirror.

>>38839312
My legs are god mode but I have pig disgusting varicose veins all down my left leg. My mom has the same thing.

>>38847938
>Currently just adding a little bit of weight everytime

that's what you do, especially when you're still a beginner and getting dem noob gains

>do your sets to completion without failure and with good form
>add 5lbs to each side next time at the gym
>do that until you can do your sets to completion with good form
>add 5lbs to each side
>so and so forth

as a beginner you should get fairly linear progress without stalls with a proper diet and sleep

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>that guy whose package is always clearly visible during leg presses

>>38848012
My package is pretty much always visible because my shorts are too tight. I don't give a fuck desu

>>38848032
No I mean like fully visible

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>>38848039
L-like outlined or is it just straightup falling out?

>>38847824
Ok that's fucked up.

>the roiders that curl 15kgs, bench 1plate for 12 and are triple your size

>girls that do nothing but babyweights and 10 mins on some cardio equipment

>dyel kids doing brosplit for 2 years and staying the same size

>PT getting paid to teach people how squatting 1/4th ROM is ok

>everyone

>literally everyone falls into one of these categories at most gyms in greece


After getting kicked from the 3rd commercial gym in my life, i finally decided to join a proper gym. Costs almost 4 times the money and i'm broke as fuck, but fuck it it's worth it.

If anyone is interested I can post stories of how I got kicked

>>38848060
No straight up visible

Maybe the shorts are too baggy or maybe they just open wide when he puts his legs up or maybe his underwear is baggy I dunno

>that guy doing 'snatches' with the black 5kg bumpers and dropping the bar from overhead after his ss routine on one of the platforms because weightlifting is elitist and he thinks it means the people occasionally looking over at him are impressed
complete even one (a single) full depth squat first buddy

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>>38839352
This is me desu

>>38847921
>ameritips

>>38848081
i'm more interested in how you're greek and can afford anything; whats your financial situation, i know youth unemployment is something like 50%, but are you that young

>That guy randomly handing out lifting gloves

>>38848116
ye situation is shit, I'm studying atm and I live in student dorms so I don't pay rent. I get some neetbux cause of disability, so I use that money for gym and nutrition basically

>>38846167
Hello fellow ledditor xD

>>38848102
Do you at least let other people work in?

>that guy who is a 65 year old ex-bodybuilder who lifts as much as you and is always in a very good mood and spends a lot of his time encouraging dyels, teaching them proper form

>>38839240
>that guy stretching on every piece of equipment for 40 minutes and then he leaves

>that guy on his first sip

>>38839382
>the tall blonde with the amazing ass that walks around but never really does any working out

lel we have one that I always see on Sunday. She does 30secs of lying down leg press in the smith machine per 10mins and 9m30s peacocking around the gym.

Cracking, tight body. Butterface.

>>38846167
zOMG can i screencap this!!! ohahahah its hilarious

That guy talking to himself in the weight room and he just keeps repeating something every couple of minutes

>>38847938

Do 3x5 3 times a week MWF. Add weight each session,start light with GOOD FUCKING TECHNIQUE

After you stall 2-3 times you do
3x8 pause bench, 3x8 touch and go Alternate each day and progress each day individually

When you stall on both days, add weight still so you can still do 3x7,3x6,3x5 until you can only hit the weight for 3x5 after some time

When you are at 3x5 for both pause and bench,

Then do

5x5 touch and go monday, 4x5 pause bench + triceps wednesday, 1x5 heavy, 2x3 pause bench for some smooth back off sets.

Do this AFTER you LEARN P`FUCKING PROPER TECHNIQUE

Congratz, you can know bench close to 3 plates if you have short arms and good press strength

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>set up diddly lift with the weight I want
>realize I need to fill my water bottle
>leave gym bag and hoodie on top of the bar and pl8 to show it's mine
>come back from refill
>see dude deadlifting my bar
>see my gym bag and hoodie moved to the side

>>38839543
>wearing cargos
He's never gonna make it.

>>38841442
You met Rippetoe

>>38839522

lel why do they all make that same noise??

If I have to grunt, it's open mouthed and angry.

>>38839295
>1.5pl8 deatlift
Why live?

>>38839240
>that guy who has been benching 1 plate for the last year

Hey that's me

>>38846167
Kek

>The guy curling an EZ bar, drops it mid set, screams, "Fuck! Everything's fucked! Fuck life," walks out and you never see him again.

>>38846405
I've gone from 40kg squat to 65kg squat in 6 months doing 5x5 SS

Send help, I suck

>>38847968
O shit, the gym isn't that big?

>>38848973
There's a parallel universe on the other side of the mirror; one where Zyzz lives and you have a gf.

You will never enter that universe.

>>38848233
For me, this was the gym owner, Kenny. I fucking loved Kenny. Then his son sold the gym to planet fitness esque outfit. Fuck man, I miss my old gym.

>>38839240
Not everyone wants to become a muscle freak you now. Maybe he's happy with his form and just wants to preserve it. I did this some time, it was great, you look nice, enjoy the workout, and there is very little fatigue.

>>38848821
>5x5 SS
There's no such thing, your first problem.
Second, read the book.

>>38849118
>not knowing about 5x5 Strong Strength

kys

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>that girl giving birth on the squat rack

>>38849412
>That couple conceiving in the sauna.

>>38847188
me too, bro

i know a guy whos been lifting 4-5 years and his max on bench is 85kg

max bench. 85.

>>38849550
for sets right?

>>38849550
1 rep max...

>>38840418
That's my father. He's always at the gym for 2+hours, hanging around, talking to people, making friends, flirting with cardiobunnies. Meanwhile
>52 years old
>6'4"
>235lbs
>280lbs bench for 12 reps
>~12%bf

He's doing the broest of brosplits, doesn't squat/deadlift, doesn't do much if anything other than machines/cables. No doubt natty since he goes crazy when I drink my whey around him. "Don't put that toxic processed shit into your body, do the work and you'll get the results"

that middle aged fat guy that's always on the torso-twist machine
every
fucking
day

>>38849641

so that's old man strength then?

the old skinny man that does alternating curls with crazy weight swinging them each rep

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>that guy running on the treadmill with a permanent death stare

>>38839240
the mentally challenged guy who gets out his belly and rubs it while watching himself in the mirror when he thinks nobody is looking

>tfw you're always looking

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>that bald old man that benches the same exact weight on the smith machine every single morning for months

>>38849885
He's probably just maintaining at that age

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>>38849795
>That guy who swings the bar like a sword
[spoiler]It's more like a slab of iron than a sword[/spoiler]

>>38839312
I am hairy as a motherfucker

>>38840388
muscles get used to the same stimuli repeated enough times and /or frequently enough.
'confuse your muscles', it helps to prevent plateauing

>>38847018
I think people who sip between every set are just looking for something to do

I doubt anyone who's been to the gym for more than a week truly believes that they need to hydrate between every set

>>38847021
he's being friendly and coming to you, tho

>>38850375
how do i get to be guts mode? im interested in a filipino chick and she's a weeb too so i wanna cosplay as guts and casca with her

>>38851567
underrated post.

protip, i'm a filipino dude and take it from me , filipino chicks love white men, if you're white, you're right. esp white australians

>>38839240
This is me

>>38839258
I only shave in the gym Voltaire room.

>>38839295
Kek this is me, I've been lifting for 6 months and I'm fat but deadlifts are easy

>>38839408
Holy shit that would be hilarious to see.

>that goddamn skinny dyel nigger that stinks so fucking bad and never puts back the lmaopl8s he used.


rwds soon

>>38841519

I've been discovered

>That fat bitch that thinks she can justify being fat bc she lifts weights like guys.
Bitch can only bench one pl8 but she is like 5'6" 220lb

>>38851741
one time an asian guy and his friend asked me if id video him attempting to bench two plate and he failed a half rep and then gave a thumbs up toward the camera. and everyone in the gym turned to look cause i guess they thought it was a superstar. was amazing.

>>38848081
Let's hear it lad

>That guy who comes in and sings to his own headphone music while everyone is trying not to laugh at him while lifting.

>>38839258
somewhat related but...

>WHO ARE YOU BABY POWDER GUY?

some dude always uses baby powder in the locker and it is everywhere! likr ehat the fuck?

>>38839257
WILLITS
I
L
L
I
T
S

>>38849795
das me

>>38848118
Gloveanon!

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>>38839738
>that guy who rows in the squat rack
>that guy who does pullups in the power cage
>that guy who does military press in the squat rack

Me. The equipment is there and there's no pull-up bar apart from the cage/rack.

>>38840022
That'd be me. It's natty and I gained 15kg. Only now starting to fit in my skellington clothes.

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>>38839240
>that faggot that wears pic related to the gym

>>38839522
Das me.

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>>38839348
das ist me

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>>38839240

>>38839592
>he just said to feel free to ask for a spot in the future
>Gave him a y-you too and fled

Are you me?

>the nigga with 10 cellphones benching 4pl8, then asking the whitest dyel to spot him.

it is always me :-(

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>>38839240
>last year
Try 2 and a half.

>>38847164
What country?

>>38839305
>:( fuck that dude.

>>38840096
took a yoga class saw this once. I can never go back there i saw full clam.

>>38840215
i do that too i change into a tshirt but I'm in slacks and casual shoes.

30 minutes of hard work makes a difference.

>>38845579
Am I the only person who knows my limits and don't fail if I don't have a spotter

>>38854271

he's prob looking for the least amount of assistance possible. most ppl help too much when spotting. he knows you're weak so you'll only be able to barely help, which is all he needs

>>38846632
Me. Just started. I'm skinny fat with gangly ass arms.

>The hungry skeleton blowing out of his ass for a 100lb squat.

Before you ask; yes, this is me.

>that guy with a pathetic bench but decent squat and dl
2 months newbie here and my squat and deadlifts are double my bench, am I doing it wrong

>>38854532

i'd rather workout in my dress shirt and change out the slacks. shirts you can get washed and pressed easily, but if the slacks are decent they need to be dry cleaned (or just spot cleaned when you get something on them).

>>38839240
Screw you I have shoulder instability. I don't want to dislocate my shoulders. n o B u l l y

>>38851653
Mail order brides don't count as your everyday filipino chick you beta

>that fat teenager who visits almost the whole week with his /fit/ gym buddy and hangs out with the riod dealer but still losing weight

Mirin u brah

>>38839240
>that guy with the deformed face
>that guy with the badly shaved beard
>that father son duo
>that old black guy with a Jordan shirt
>that roided up nerd guy with his Thai wife
>that 10% bodyfat women
>that guy with the same body and hair as Zyzz
>that bald roiding guy who makes animal noises
>that bald roiding guy with a 5% shirt
I go to the same Gym for like 5 years I know even more dudes

>>38846947
i like this guy

> Middle aged guy who only ever does Olympic lifts
>Weird as fuck
>Thinks people are peasants for doing bench press instead of mysterious barbell swirlies
>Literally looks like a packet of dry spaghetti

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>>38846947
me irl

>>38839522
>SHOOP .... AAAAAH

>>38856004
That guy who spots u when u never fucking asked causing you to fucking lose your flow and actually need a spot.

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>>38849795
lifting without rage is pointless

>>38850463
i just like doing it and it cant hurt

>>38846167
That guy that keeps doing back rows while the old guy next to him is getting a hearth attack

>>38839632
Fuck that guy

>>38839240
My face when I quit lifting for 3 years, lost 40 pounds, became a skeleton runner, but could still bench 2.5 plates on my first try

>Delts-Man
>Comes in, does 1 hour of different shoulder exercises
>leaves

The dude has HUGE delts. That's it. No other muscles looks like he has ever trained them before except for his triceps which he uses for OHP.
I laughed so hard that day

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>>38839240
>That guy doing the same full body routine every monday till friday
>He's making more progress then the rest of dyels at my gym
>Dude never says a word to anyone
>Always earplugs in
>He is the king of all the dyels at my gym
Mfw this is actually me

>>38847002
>>38847034
>>38856107
You faggots acting like it's you. At least post lifts so we know you actually lift "heavy weights".

>>38845091
you're welcome man

>>38856550
>He's making more progress then the rest of dyels at my gym
>And then I woke up

End

>>38848592
I do that
Don't want to disturb anyone but i have to let air out so i go for tsss like boxers do
It's quieter

>That one guy who collapses onto his knees after a heavy set of deadlifts

That guy who only lifts twice a week and only uses machines, however he still has a better physique than most at the gym. Burn baby. Burn.

>>38849795
>tfw I always march on german WWII music on the threadmill for 10 minutes before I begin my routine
I have that deathstare because I imagine myself being a waffenSS operator when I warm up

>>38847921
>tipping the front desk?
why tho, you pay a monthly fee already

>>38841519
Me

Parallel squats (90 degrees) are the most accurate way to do squats. Ass to grass damages your knees. Ask Ronnie Coleman

>the guy that does poor form crossfit exercises by himself and thinks he's the fucking man

>>38857582
Shit man, are you me?

>>38856004
We might go to the same gym...and you might have listed me here

>>38847589
I'm a little guilty here.

>>38846990
Anon pls tell me this is kg...

>>38847043
this me. I was just tired of being fat bro

>last time at gym before quad injury stopped me
>doing my rows in power rack
>two teenage girl come over to the squat rack next to me
>proceed to quarter squat the bar a couple times each
>leaves squatrack
>moved to leg press directly across it
>one girl starts legpressing without any weight on it for like 50 reps
>other girl has found a 20 lbs straight bar and is doing some strange half deadlift half squat with it
>they then go over and bench press the bar about 3 times each
>leaves

I wanted to help them so badly but by the time i finished my last set of rows they had just left to go to the bench and I didn't want to be a creep. Still, was fucking weird.

Also
>nickname every regular at my gym
>asian 60 yo with a bowl cut and always smiling
>Happy
>roided bodybuilder from the bronx who always corrects my form and gives me tips in his dialect of english that makes my day
>The Italian Job
>Father and son who only do supersets as fast as possible using the smith machine and two plates as free weights
>Heckler and Koch