/fit/ rage stories

If you weren't so beta you could have all tag teamed her

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Had a laugh

>>38818205
this happened

>>38818218
Babilon batty boi, baka.

>>38818205
Why not just become a marine, mma fighter, and bodybuilder all at once?

>>38818205
>bragging about being a marine
Lets start bragging about paying taxes, not being obese and being able to walk without assistance as well

>>38818205
Yeah nah that didnt happen

Worst dialogue ever

>>38818263
As opposed to what?

not being able to handle friendly bantz

> full blown autism

Some of you are laughing in here. But only because OP didn't finish the story.

>OP then whipped out his massive shlong
>The person who called him a "roid loser" is stunned, completely speechless
>He gazes into his magnificent rod with pure wonder
>"Y-y-you're a big guy" he says
>"For you" OP says with a confident chuckle
>Meanwhile his two bros are cowering in fear
>Their heads gaze down at the ground
>Both of them avoiding eye contact with OP because of how fucking alpha he is
>After a few seconds of awkward silence the marine speaks up
>"Dude, I...... I had no idea. P-please find it in your heart to f-forgive me. I-I-I'm begging you."
>The mma fighter manages to mumble something too
>"We had no idea you were so alpha bro.........just please don't fuck this girl that's with us. We had already been planning on one of us getting with her for a long time. Please have some understanding bro"
>OP looks to the girl that's with them
>Her eyes are as big as dinner plates
>She's foaming at the mouth and licking her lips lusting for OP's massive fuck stick
>He takes a few seconds glancing between this cock hungry slut and the two whimpering betas staring at the ground that he calls "friends"
>With one calm and confident breath OP simply says "No"
>Tears stream down his two bros faces
>They both fall to the ground and sulk
>OP then rips off the cock hungry sluts clothes with one swift motion
>He sticks his gigantic serving of meat inside of her
>She begins screaming like a wild chimpanzee on meth
>A crowd begins to form around OP
>People start cheering him on
>Some even start clapping at his impressive performance
>The crowd grows larger
>OP continues thrusting himself inside the little cum dumpster nearly putting her in a coma
>The crowd grows larger
>Multiple news crews pull up to the scene waiting to interview OP for his amazing performance

>>38818205

>functional strength

>>38818718

>Suddenly a young teenage boy emerges from the crowd
>"Sir, I was just recently diagnosed with stage 7 bone cancer. I've felt nothing but hopelessness these past few weeks. I was even thinking about killing myself tonight. But then I saw your performance. And I have to say, you give me hope. Thank you very much. Can I have your autograph?"
>"Sure thing kid" OP says while still pounding the skank into oblivion
>OP sets a piece of paper on the slut's ass and signs his name while still shoving his colossal shuttle cock in her
>He hands it to the frail young man and with a cocky wink says "Stay in school kid"
>At this point the crowd loses their minds
>"This man is a fucking hero!" one person shouts
>"What the fuck did I just witness?!" another screams in confusion
>"I want to have your babies" hundred of women scream
>The crowd goes into such a frenzy from OP's heroic efforts that they begin rioting
>Cars are pushed over and burned
>Entire sky scrapers destroyed
>Martial law is declared and the military begins killing every rioter in sight
>Thousands of people are slaughtered
>OP's two bros run into oncoming police fire on purpose because they have been so humiliated and have nothing to live for
>OP continues to bang the skank who is now dead at this point from blunt force trauma
>A few SWAT team members even manage to high five him and take some selfies during the riots
>OP them decides he is done
>He slowly walks away from the worthless whore and leaves her lying on the ground for the rioters to trample
>He sparks up a Cuban cigar
>As he's walking away another massive skyscraper explodes in the background
>He takes his first exhale from the cigar and confidently says "Just another day" with a deep alpha chuckle

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>>38818718
>>38818741

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>>38818205
>Flex them to dead
Make me laugh, thank you OP
Have this

>>38818843
> cancer

kek

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>>38818718
>>38818741

>OP continues to bang the skank who is now dead at this point from blunt force trauma

5/5

Also the rest of ending was pure gold.

>>38818843

>cancer

LMAO

>>38818205
They're not wrong tho?

>>38818718

>not fucking them both to establish dominance

never gonna make it.

>>38818718
>>38818741
10/10

>>38818718
>>38818741

Max lulz

>>38818205
>>38818843
Stop it bros I can't lift things up when I'm laffin

>>38818205
>3 guy friends, one girl
Ah, the classic friendzone gang she'll never bang. Commonly seen in middle and high schools all around the world.

>>38818741
Include me in the screencap

>>38818718
>>38818741
TOPKEK