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>be me
>at gym
>low intensity and volume day
>while dicking around notice a new member signing up
>6-7/10 qt 3.142857
>womanlet but damn she looks good in her yoga pants and tight top
>make eye contact
>smile foolishly
>surprisingly smiles back
>oops time is up
>decide i will show her what im worth the next time we meet.
forwd couple of days
>dumb ass stretching
>wearing pic related (top is one size larger than me)
>spy the lady getting into the lockers
>decide to go ahead on my master plan
>squat, bench, dead
>warm up while she changes
>after eternity she emerges
>and i immediately start doing squats
>start with half of my weight
>she didnt even look
>next set convince my self to do exactly my weight
>saw her glance while i load up
>ear-bud up to avoid to nonsense around me
>thingsaregettinghot.jpeg
>set number 3, squat 1.5 of my weight
>sweat visible on face
>she is just standing and staring at me
>i act like nobody is around
>loving this shit
>decide to go all out
>last set 2 times my weight
>load up
>everyone is staring
cont?
>>38665104
Nah
>>38665104
Did op poop In the power rack?
>>38665104
Suicide? Yeah.
>>38665104
why the fuck did you even take the time out of your day to write this fucking shit story you fucking dyel loser
probably a welcome change of wanking it to tranny porn and eating cheetos you dumb stupid fuck
>2 times my weight
What the fuck does this mean? Your bodyweight?
And if so
>he fell for the bodyweight multiplier meme
contd!
>everyone seems to be staring
>even the receptionist bitch who always give me a hard time
>letsdothis.mpeg
>rep one
> shaky start to but okay
>rep two
>alright! gettin the hang of this...
>rep three
>wait my pants feel uncomfortably tight
>mid way of rep four
>rrrrrrrrrrrrrrriipppppppppppp
>oh shit oh shit...
>cant do anything about it now finish rep
>rack up
>pants couldnt handle the awesomness of my buttocks
>the back part of my pant completely blown out
>butijuststrated.mkv
>knw that everyone saw this horror show
>everybody being a good sport acting like nothing happened
>remember i have my swimming trunks in my gym bag
>decide i gonna wear them
> in the lockers changing
>qt 3.14 walks in
>no pants
>say "you saw that didnt you..." with a smile
cont?
>>38665217
do it
>>38665217
how can a girl walk into your locker room? do you have unisex locker rooms? i think im missing something
>>38665275
op here sorry i didn't make that clear earlier its unisex.
but most girls are shy so they change in th shower stalls and put their stuff in the lockers
>>38665217
No one asked you to continue
Go home kid
>>38665303
>>38665217
fucking hell, op finish the story
last
>you saw that didnt you...
>whatdidijustsay.png
>she smiles but no reply
>she seems to be looking for something in her bag
>hi my name is anon,
>still no pants on
>oh! sorry hi im anonet think lost my earphones
>i offer her mine
>waytododumbass.avi
>that nice of you but i dont like ear buds
>god i falling!! nothing more to say borderline suicide.
>finish up and about to go out back
>she says "you have a nice butt (paraphrasing), you look good in shorts"
>confidence returns
>"do you wanna go have some juice after."
>yeah sure
that how i ended up
wearing gnx trunks at the gym
having a GF
and a knee injury
>be at gym this morning
>pull day
>doing db rows
>two scrawny asians in cutoff shirts come up next to me
>both have bosu balls
>put bosu balls on ground upside down
>one stands on bosu ball
>other starts pushing on him, testing balance
>allofmywhy.tiff
>one not on bosu ball flips his over
>grabs 10lb dbs
>gets on bosu ball
>starts shadow boxing with 10lb dbs
>flailing like an idiot
>very unsteady
>everybody watching
>getting really into his shadow boxing
>goes for Balrog style uppercut finishing move
>foot slips off side of bosu ball
>ankle rolls, snaps
>foot now at 90 degrees sideways
>him laying on ground, bottom of foot pointing in the air
>screaming in pain
>friend runs to front desk
>trainer runs over to check
>everyone else goes back to lifting
>>38665649
Jesus christ how horrifying
>>38665104
okey
be the other day
>come to gym in usual clothes
>pajama pants for dat dere comfort and zyzz-style golds gym shirt
>secret weapon in gym back
>approach squat rack
>do warmup set
>deploy secret weapon, spray whipped cream can I brought directly into my mouth
>do 4x5 heavy squats spraying whipped cream in mouth after each one
>Nigga curling in other squat rack gettin mad
>move to do OHP, pressin dat weight
>continue whipped cream treatment
>nigga comes over and says "ey mayne, why you eatin' dat whipped cream man" obviously pissed
>reply "muh gains" with mouth full of cream
>wonderful cream
>in my mouth
>nigga leaves, presumably to go get manager
>hide whipped cream
>manager comes in, walks over, looks around, gives nigga the weirdest look ever, shakes his head and leaves
>walk into new gym
>looks legit enough, plenty of machines, free weights, one squat rack, one smith machine
>about 8 people in gym, 7 guys one qt3.41 6/10
>Every motherfucker there is doing bench of curls
>Highschool faggots walk in, have no idea what they're doing
>Asian lifting in khakis
>but no the worst in the room by far
>A middle aged man and his kid curling for at least an hour and a half
>He has a lifting belt on
>All of my WHY.jpg
>They do every variation of curls known to man
>They're finally finishing up, big finale
>load up oly bar with ever 5 and 10 lb weight
>Dad is doing curl after curl after curl
>Oh yeah use dat back
>Practically kipping
>Start laughing while finishing on abs
>LOOK STRAIGHT AT HIM AND LAUGH
>are people this fucking stupid?
>be at gym this morning
>normal morning, old people and housewives doing their lightweight exercises
>suddenly
>nigger in power cage squatting LMAO2PLAET
>okay, lets see this nigger go
>proceeds to stretch his arms out and hold onto the plates instead of the bar
>u wot m8
>carry on
>doing my dips
>another nigger spotted
>she has a barbell on her back leaping like a god damn frog
>okay...
>look in the other direction
>fat mom on the cable machine
>holding about waist high
>pulls back a few inches
>does bodyweight squat
>nigga this is gettin weird
>look over at power cage again
>this guy trying to do heavy bent-over rows
>bends over about 5 degrees
>does 1/16 rom
>leave the gym reconsidering my thoughts about September 11
such is life
>Be at gym
>9/10 Cute girl is talking with trainer
>All the guys I know are either too fat or too skinny
>Ears perk up. I'm not too fat or too skinny.
>She continues "Then if they're actually jacked they're too short."
>shoulders sink dejectedly and I go back to my workout.
Being a manlet myself I hate height trolling but this is actually a true story.
>pic looks like grill
>>38665954
>not learning
>>38665819
Holding the plates for squats is a thing people do though.
>>38665104
are you stupid Pi is 3,1415926...