Dog food

So far I've started off with boiling it. For two purposes: one, to sanitize it; two, to make it softer. Then I grind it in a food processor with water, until it's fine enough that I can chug it without having to chew too much.

It's bitter, so I plug my nose and down it goes.

After the stuff is boiled, it seems like you've either got to eat it right there or pitch it. It seems to not keep well after boiling. Diarrhea city.

>>38090904

Do you drag your ass across the carpet when your butt itches?

>>38090904
this fucking board

>>38090990
Usually just scratch with my index finger through the boxers.

The dogfood does not seem to cause itchy butthole syndrome, although my excretory system doesn't love the stuff. Like I mentioned, parasites and diseases should be killed with the boiling.

>>38090904
WOOF haha xD

>>38091032
>>>/reddit/

>>38091032
Don't laugh at me you faggot

>>38091027
> my excretory system doesn't love the stuff.
If I have any fruit that day, I'll usually eat it with the dogfood shake because it helps with digestion; the stool will come out a little more solid.

Am I really the first person who's had this idea? Whey protein is $10 a pound. Who's got that kind of money all the time?

>>38091274
If u can't spare $10 to avoid eating dogfood, you need to work on your life skills wayyyy more than your lifts.

Bruh, get a job that pays more than $12/hr, you lazy fuck.

>>38091471
>get a job
Do you have any suggestions as to how? I mean it's not like I've never tried. I interview poorly, and entry level positions are heavy competition where I live.

>>38091274
>$10 a lb. A scoop weighs next to nothing
>who has that kind of money.. $10
If you cannot afford 10 dollars to support your Hobbie then you need to prioritize your life, get a job? Stop being a NEET faggot who lives off his parents. Get your life in order then start lifting.
Fucking dog food.. I swear to god fit.

>>38090904
What about the macros tho?

>>38091926
Cut your hair, shave your face, go to Walmart and spend that $10 on some decent looking clothes for an interview, do research online how to impress hiring managers, make sure you smell good and have brushed your teeth.
I'm a hiring manager at my company ask me anything I'm serious.

>>38091274
>>38091974

Reasonable advice, for sure. But I'm not going to just not lift until I find work. That could take months and months, and exercise is fun, and mostly free.

>>38092009
Thanks. How should I approach explaining or hiding large gaps in time on my resume?

>>38090904

Dumb ass shit post, 0/10, a kek bowhere to be found.

CMON

>>38092218
Yea it's kind of funny, but I'm not posting this thread to be funny

>>38090917
reddit plz go

>>38092201
How old are you and how long are the gaps?

>>38092331
25, >= 1 year

>>38090904
So many dogs and cats get cancer that I can't really recommend this. The stuff that goes into their food is sweepings from meat factory floors, mouldy grains, etc.

>>38092356
Well you can pretty much get any low level job if you are honest and tell them you just want to get your life together and start working again, if you're generally honest most managers can see that and will give you a chance but watch you closely for productivity at the start. If you don't want to do that and can lie pretty good, tell them you had a sick family member that you had to take care of and had to take some time off. No interviewer will pry into something like that. Anything else?

>>38092405
>So many dogs and cats get cancer that I can't really recommend this.

By joe, you're completely right.

However, it just so happens that this particular brand of dogfood is premium, top shelf stuff. No corn, soy, or wheat, no meat by products, no artificial preservatives, ect.

I'll definitely consider the cancer risk when I'm through this bag.

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>>38090917

>>38092428
>if you're generally honest most managers can see that and will give you a chance
I understand. I guess this is what I'll have to do. Easier than lying. My lack of basic social skills makes lying difficult

>>38092428
>any low level job

Do you have any recommendations for entry level jobs that are less customer service oriented? It's hard to find ditch digging positions anymore. I would love to get a job as a ditch digger.

>>38092552
I'm not sure if you're fucking with me or being serious. But if not the latter, look into warehouse jobs and nightcrew positions at grocery stores. I actually work for a giant grocery chain and a lot of our night guys are anti social etc, but the help needs are so bad well hire almost anyone who isn't a drug addict.

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The beautiful neet masterace in all of it's glory.

>>38092600
>nightcrew positions at grocery stores
You know I've applied like 5 times to be a midnight box lifter at the only grocery store that's in walking distance of my house. Maybe I should branch out and apply to places I can get to with the bus.

>look into warehouse jobs
What do you mean by that? Like, specifically, what are "warehouse jobs," like where do you go and what do you do?

>a drug addict
I'm probably addicted to coffee and tobacco, but I'm definitely addicted to porn. No drugs though, miraculously. I just can't let myself be an alcoholic. It'll ruin my body.

>>38092600
>>38092675

>smokes and eats dog food

he is fucking with you or he is so retarded that he should probably kill him self for the best of the world. I hope he gets cancer soon if the latter is the truth.

>>38090904
You stupid fuck

You can't afford dry beans for protein?

>>38093159
Kek, saw that coming. Smoking always upsets the fuck out of normies for some reason.

Usually I dig my tobacco out of ashtrays. 4 butts and you've got some good, resiny tobacco for rolling.

>Wishing me a painful death because I smoke
That's a little much, don't you think, anon? I smoke like the equivalent of 3 cigs a day, if I can't scrounge up that much.

>>38093202
Beans are an excellent calorie source, for sure. But unless I go do some $2.00/hr shilling, my income is exactly $0.00.

>>38093202
>>38093228
Or, I should add, I get most of my food from dumpsters. So beans, rice, and other such dried goods with long shelf lives, are rarely thrown away for me to find. Mostly I subsist on potatoes and chicken that I salvage from the deli counter's trash. Last week, though, I found like 50 pounds of dogfood.

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>>38090917

Stay away from any "meat and bone" or "meat" meal - the legal requirements for dog food are not surprisingly fucking lax

"Meat and Bone Meal and Meat Meal
: Meat and bone meal has been a
staple protein in pet foods and is still used by a great many today."

From the National Renders Association

Rendering turns dead animals (horses, fallen cows, non slaughtered animals, even euthanized pets) into useful products IE pet food

>>38090904
Dog food is mostly carb filler (as a neet I assume you're buying cheap). Literally eat eggs. It's cheap and you will be less retarded.

>>38093278
Do what you gotta.
But a Mongolian Horse Inseminating Letterboard Forum is prolly not gonna get you good answers.
But shit, it can't be too bad over a short term.

>>38093390
>>38093377
See
>>38093278
>>38092505

Useful suggestions, thank you. Although dry beans are a much cheaper source of protein than eggs, if I had the money for either. And dogfood, by law, has to be a certain ratio of protein to carbs. The stuff I have now is like 30% protein to 60% carbs. Pretty much the same that I'd get with beans.

>>38093463
Kek

>>38090904
no it'll give you stomach problems because it contains bone meal
you can eat cat food though
would prolly be cheaper to just eat beans n rice though

>>38091032
underated post

>>38090904
Get the one that does not have the "no growth hormone" notice or similar.

>>38091032
kek, gart eem

lol op i spend 60 bucks a pop on lv 100 wow char boosts does that make you mad

>>38092675
look on craigslist

"picker packer" "manufacturing" "laborer"

There's warehouses and factory's out there that will hire weirdos retards and felons because they're short staffed