Former anorexic here Ask me anything brehs

what sterons

how long

>third to fourth pic

How much time passed between them?

>ever being anorexic as a male
>being a real man ever

pick one and only one

>>36969123
pipe down fatty

>>36969089
>>36969110
No roids. I'm 5'5", 142lbs in the bottom two rows. Most likely stunted my growth so I am a perma manlet

The top 3 pics are from 2007, I was hospitalized in 2008 at 16 years old, had got re-addicted to WoW from 2008-2012 then it went to shit in my opinion. Some girl rejected me and I started lifting in 2012 at 20, felt a lot of my 'habits' coming back, not starving myself or anything but tracking macros meticulously, going hard as fuck in the gym, etc. Found a balance with it now thankfully, although I had a run in with binge eating not so long ago too.

tl;dr no rons, from the first pic about 8 years, from the fourth pic down that's somewhere around over 3 years

>>36969123
I don't know about that, I just started running because I was tubby from years of playing WoW all day eating shit food. Didn't take long before I wasn't eating anything and running way too much. I just think it became so addictive to me and I didn't know how to stop. I like to think my experiences (not just the anorexia) have made me a better person, more empathetic of others, humility, better work ethic/staying power/willpower.

I do sometimes wish I had found a gymbrah in 2007 to help me get started the right way, instead of killing myself through starvation, but that's in the past. Who knows, maybe if I never got anorexia I never would have stuck with the gym.

>>36969216
Also meant to say, I was going to roid, I was working in a gym and actually had them and was encouraged by a few guys I worked with and some members to go ahead and start. Thankfully the owner caught me, thought I was dealing in the gym so he called the cops on me. It was Test-E and Dbol, just the usual first timer stack but I never did take them. I still have them, I think they expire in 2017, but I don't want to take it so they're just sitting in my cupboard somewhere. I just ended up getting fired, I live in the UK so no real penalty over having a few vials of test and dbol.

>>36969081
>Ask me anything
Hows the wainscoting in the bathroom holding up?

>>36969081
It's not a question but as a former anorexic myself, I am proud of you

>>36969264
Not bad actually, looks like a bit of water has splashed on it from the bath and taken away a bit of the colour of the wood though. Nothing too serious though since everyone in the house uses the shower most of the time

>>36969277
Thanks man! How is things with you since recovery?

Funny story, I posted this on bodybuilding.com forums a few months ago when I made this collage thing.

A guy in my gym recognized it and showed a couple of folks and they were impressed, he also put me in contact with a friend of his who is also anorexic and I've been talking to him on Facebook for a few months now. Gym also put up a couple of pics of my transformation and I got a free months membership which was cool. 18 y/o gym heavenly blessed beauty also saw the post and was impressed, approached me in a nightclub one night talking about it and have been talking to her now and again in the gym since. Not sure if she's into manlets though plus shes 6 years younger. Still though, would not pull out

>>36969258
>wanker boss calls cops on you
>lose your job
>thankfully
Fuck you, you pathetic cuck.

>>36969081
What was your height and weight at your thinnest?

>>36969398
It wasn't the worst job, but it was minimum wage and in a bad part of town. The guy who owned the place was dieting for a show and on tren which made him a paranoid, angry, asshole a lot of the time. He went through my bag and found the rons, I have no idea why he did because I was not acting suspicious at all and they were hidden under a couple of towels in my gym bag which was also zipped up.

I say thankfully because it saved me from injecting shit, I have no doubt in my mind now that I would have fucked it up or be blasting insane amounts of gear by now or something. Plus this was in like my first year and a half of lifting

>>36969412
I'm somewhere between 5'5-5'6 now, 142lbs in those last few pics but heaviest I bulked up to was 180lbs. I can't remember the exact weight but I was somewhere around 90lbs, probably 5'3-5'4 since I grew an inch within a month or so if being refed. Diet was still shit for years after that so I didn't really grow much after that

>>36969081
How did you overcome the anxiety of "becoming fat". I'm an anorexic as well, started a serious training program with a clean bulking diet just a month and a half ago. I've barely put on a kilo, still am under 5% body fat but feel like quitting because my facial bones do not stick out as much as before. I'm sure most people down the street would still consider me skinny as fuck, but I feel "fat" and don't like that. How did you overcome that feeling? Therapy? Drugs?
The one fucker who told me "you look fuller lately" just did it for me, I'm about to go back to starvation mode. Help a fellow skelly out, anon!

>>36970196
>>36969469
I actually think I'm worse than you when you started, not just because of the psychological issues, but I'm 5'11" and barely 120lb. I've been like this for the past 14 years, with multiple visits to the hospital, the last serious one being a heart issue I had 2 years ago.

>>36970196
Hopefully you're still here bro. Yeah I know that feel, that actually brought back a memory for me.

I went to see my grandmother with my mother and she mentioned something about my face looking swollen or some similar comment, and then she said something about 'maybe you just put on weight' or some bullshit remark. No one outside of my close family knew about the anorexia, looking back that wasn't even long before I was forced into hospital so she was more than likely talking about my cheek bones sticking out a mile since I had lost saw her. That made me fucking rage so hard, I can't believe I actually forgot about this to be honest. I honestly have no idea why she said that, before I even dropped out of school a few people were concerned about me.

So yeah I completely understand man. That is a huge part of recovery, even people who tell you that you look better can be a huge 'trigger' (hate using that word, but we're talking about a serious mental disorder here so I mean it seriously). It's a fucking demon man, I can pretty much guarantee that guy meant 'fuller' as in 'you don't look quite as sick as the last time i saw you'. I dunno man, in a way I knew I was sick and that I would have to get better, I recall a girl from my class at school seeing me a few months after I had dropped out and her face just dropped looking at me. I knew at that point that I was fucked up.

You probably don't want to hear it but have you ever thought of talking to somebody? The whole way through my recovery seeing different counselors and psychiatrists was a huge pain in the ass that I did not want anything to do with. I don't know so much about the law but I was forced to go by my parents because I was still a minor and they would be charged if they did not get me help (I think that is the case) but if you're an adult then you're no obligated to go. But you do need help bro, take it from someone who has been through it

>>36970382
The worst pic I can find is that one on the top, second to the left, that was around Christmas time and I was hospitalized a month after so I still dropped more. Wish I could find more because they're somewhere

Do it before it affects your long term health. I was told in hospital my weight wasn't the lowest they had seen (which I hated to hear), but my health was fucked, they did say I had to go in now or I'd be dead in a matter of weeks if I kept going. It'd be a painful death I reckon. It's also just wasting your life man, you're obsessing over food and how you look constantly, you're probably freezing right now and can't get heat in your body, your social life has probably had a toll taken on it, basically your whole life is upside down but you won't realize it until you get back to a healthy mindset.

That's why talking to someone might help, they will give you a different perspective that may make you think differently, they won't force you to do anything. Part of you is probably not wanting to change but trust me it is worth it to get away from it because you'll look back on it and think what the fuck like I am

>>36970402
Thanks for sharing this, anon. I've had therapy before and it helped. I was very close to death a few years ago when I dropped down to 105 pounds. Seriously, like hiding food and cheating before clinical tests to get trick my doctor, etc. Recognizing my having an eating disorder was a huge part of that. Thankfully, I was able to follow a stable diet and pick up some 15 pounds in the last decade. But I'm still just too thin and not eating right for a person my size, lifestyle, and age. That's got to stop.

I've had relapses, binge eating periods (where I guess I got much heavier than my current 120lb and no one said anything, perhaps because they refrained from it knowing my probelm or just did not notice, I'm far from an outgoing person). I seriously want to adopt a healthy lifestyle for once. I'm old, dude, in my late 20s. I can't keep on like this for much longer without permanently damaging my body.

I'll keep on sticking to this plan, which I'm following with a trainer and a nutritionist. I might have to add a psychologist too.

Thanks again!

>>36970461
Yep, you know I'm bipolar (diagnosed) and when I get into a manic cycle it gets even worse. Put on writing it does sound like I could use some professional help again. But trust me, I've gotten much better, the fact alone that I can talk of this at all is huge.

>>36970481
>>36970520
You can do it mate, sounds cliche as fuck but believe in yourself all the way. It's great that you can recognize that there is a problem because that's the first step.

I always sort of knew I was but the compulsions got the better of me and got worse and worse as I got on. I remember browsing pro-ana sites out of interest of what others might be going through and I thought it was fucked up, all these girls (never saw any sites with guys but I'm sure they are out there) encouraging each other to kill themselves, posting diets and shit were they'd eat like 200 calories a day.

It's so fucked man, you will realize it when you get better (I say when because I 100% believe you can do it and you should too). You're gonna make it brah

>>36970561
Thanks, bro! Really appreciate the feedback and support.

what was your nutrition ?

File: Instasize_0423230236.jpg (1MB, 1512x1512px)

1MB, 1512x1512px

5'9 110 - 148

Idk if I was anorexic, I wasn't diagnosed anyways. I would just get high, play video games, and be too lazy to get something to eat. So I would eat very very little and drink very little too on a daily basis. I had heart palpitations for several years and it landed me a trip to the hospital, they never diagnosed where the issue was stemming from they just said to drink more. The issues stopped when I gained weight.

I'm not even big by any means yet, but the thought of cutting keeps creeping into my head because I've lost my jawline and I have a bit of a tummy. Having extra fat is really troubling, I'm about 17% bf or so.

Typical /fraud/ster, complete with enough mental illness to justify telling us what steroids he takes through a fantasy tale

These are the people you ask for tips from in CBTs

>>36970930
Looking good and healthy man, keep at it

>>36969081
youre still too lean

>trading one type of body dysphoria for another

>>36969081
Do you ever miss the days of march 18 2013 when you were at a solid 158lbs?

>>36969081
Fellow former anorexic here.

Currently can't fucking stop binge eating like every other day. Gained like 30 lbs in the past month and a half. Did you go through this shit?

>>36969081
Not quite a former anorexic but I used to be 42 kg… (65 now)

Q: i've got the same gap tween my chest and my abs like what you used to have.
Its like there is a ravine in my chest and im not sure what to do about that.

>>36969081
How long did it take you to go from the last of the first row to the first of the second row and what did you do to achieve it?

>>36971453
Been there done that. It's the so called rebound effect.

>>36969081
You still have unhealthily low body fat famalam

>>36972659
When does the ride end? At obesity?

>>36973260
Different guy here
It ends after a couple months when you learn to deal with the urges mentally. I know how hard it is and you cannot be blamed for failing a lot but at the end of the day you only eat what you put in your mouth