Crossfit hate thread

>>36947326
>wtf
I did crossfit for over a year and never once saw a hurdle. That looks fucking dumb.

>>36947326
looks like track&field indoor training desu
t. track&field athlete

>>36948042
Same. Fuck is this shit

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>>36947326
>>36947326

It's like they finally realize what they're doing is retarded midway through but are too embarrassed to stop.

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>>36948042
>>36947326
One of the guys tripped over the hurdles and ended up fracturing 3 vertebrae in his back

>>36947326
Just think of it, one of the pointy ends ripping through your ripcage as you land with all your body weight on it. You try to get up with all fours on your dying breath and struggle just as one bearded hipster next to you succeds a jump an turns to you: "Nothin personel, kid!"

Anyone listened to the Tim Ferris podcast with Kelly Starret as a guest? It's literally 70% pure bullshit babble, I really encourage you to listen to see how deluded these dudes sound when they speak

Jesus christ, what the fuck.

These people are insane, not even in a potentially interesting way either.

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>>36948348
Suicidal,in a trance a religious army
Lift without form and chug on shakes
Call it fitness call it gainz
Authorized by tumblr
Become wounded as you fail and call it a successful lift

>>36948750

w2c that 9gag wristband?

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>>36948783
It's their logo

I don't get it. Wasn't crossfit created by Mark Riptoe? Why are they using such retarded techniques, surely Rip knows this shit doesn't work.
Someone explain

>>36948860
>happymerchant.jpg

>>36947326
serious question.

every video i see. Someone almost gets a potentially serious life changing, verge of paraplegic injury. Is anybody getting sued? Do they need to sign a disclaimer agreement?

>>36947326
why don't they just use styrofoam. Did they actually spend money to design and build 100 crossfit metal death trap vertical jump bars?

>>36948866
Made me sperg

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>>36948849

>>36947326
that webm is brutal

>>36947326
This is the largest amount of group retardation I've seen in a while beside /fit/

>>36948849
Are... Are they trying to do a push up?

>>36947326
What a nightmare. I'd feel more sorry for them if they weren't so stupid

>>36952353
those are a form of burpee/skiier jump mix

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>>36948866
my sides....

>>36948157

The injury rate with crossfit is so fucking high

>>36948849
There's a girl at my gym who does these.

>>36948860
Rip left when it became the shithole it is now, look it up.

>>36948157
saw that coming a mile away

>>36948866

I fucking lost it

>>36948860
Rip says that before beginning Crossfit you need a squat of at least 300 lbs for reps, he never intended it to be the shitshow that it is today

>>36952750

Crossfit says the before beginning Crossfit all you need to do is hold a 3lb PVC pipe over your head. They charge you $150 to teach you how to do this. Then the next day they've got you trying to get your bodyweight on a metal bar over your head. I can't believe nobody has had their head crushed to pulp yet.

>>36948825
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

>>36948348
ultimate kek

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Candito failed a drug test lads, he's out for good

>>36954023

sauce?

Who said that>

>>36948929
they make you sign a waiver

>>36948750
In what song should I place these wonderful lyrics?

>>36948849
There's a faggot in my gym who does this and hogs the free weight area.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=viQnHOXyqEg

>>36954490
What is it?

I can't view webm on iPhone

>>36948849
>how to paralyze your son

>>36954023
that hwy he hasn't uploaded shit in a long time?

>>36954736
yes

>>36954540
>i did 560 lb deadlift earlier
lmao this dude's so full of his shit, even his wife doesn't want him anymore, just look at her face.

>>36954673
it's like a family doing two shitty ass cleans, then a clean press, then like doing burpess and jumping over the bar to do another burpee

>>36948157

lol white people are dumbass for liking this crossfit shit

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>>36948866
>>36948866
brilliant i just shit my pants laughing

>>36952353
it's a sprawl dude.

>>36954673
Get the VLC app fellow pleb

>>36954540
Puts holes in the walls with dumb bells and gets kicked out. Comes back and gets multiple people fired. Fucking crossfit.

>>36954023
Yea you're gonna have to post some sauce for claims like that

So why does /fit/hate crossfire? Is it jealousy?

>>36954540
this video always pisses me off. what a fucking tool.

>>36948082
if it were track and field training they would be doing proper hurdle form. just look up how to hurdle because thats not how to do it.

>>36947326
I guess that's one way to fuck up your tailbone

>>36954972
Thanks friend

And iPhone is the superior choice so don't discount yourself as a pleb

>>36948157
I'm not seeing the difference in the 2 x-rays. What exactly is broken?

>>36948849
The girl in the yellow has decent clean form. Too bad she's retarded and doing it for a cardio workout.

>>36948157
I'm disturbed by the response of "lol, I broke my spine carrying 300lb..."

300lb where? And like how? I've dead lifted 365lb recently (max was 450lb when I was younger). I can't squat 315lb but I can at least hold it.

What exactly are these people doing??

>>36948348
OK, serious question. People like this obviously have nigger-tier IQ. How can they afford such expensive shit like crossfit?

>>36955747

Judging by the name, I'm guessing the guy is a strongman competitor. There's a world of difference between putting a 315 bar on your back versus picking up a 300lb atlas stone or some 300lb implement in a loading race.

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>>36947326
She's a crossfit "coach"

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>>36955802
>knees

>>36955856
How to prevent this?

>>36955802
I'D RATHER WATCH SHITTY GORE WEBMS THAN THIS SHIT, FUCK MAN

>>36955631
they appear broken in both xrays, the transverse process of the vertebrae, very dim. the piece going off to the side

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>>36954540

It absolutely baffles me that a grown ass man could have is head this far up his own ass. I honestly didn't think people were capable of even intentionally being this insufferable. Just that shit eating tone he has when talking about getting people fired, or talking about the other people in the gym "not being as enlightened as him". The best part is that when people clearly mock him, he's so fucking delusional that he thinks it's admiration. Fuck this makes me so mad. I swear to god I could be the strongest man in the world and I would never so much as think to be as pretentious and arrogant as this man child.

>>36955892
JUST KEEP THEM OUT? drop it if you cant

>>36955802
Why.jpeg


How long has cross fit been around for? You think by now they would've been able to start churning out good coaches or something.

>>36955802
>>36955856
>>36955892
>>36955911
Everyone's form breaks down when they work at their max or go for a new one

Knee valgus also isn't dangerous although it looks really bad

>>36955892
Strong glutes. The knees going in like that transfers the load from the glutes to the quads.

>>36955966
>knees caving in to the point where they touch is okay
>it's alright your form breaks down on max sets

lolno, shoo shoo crossfit

>>36955974
Thanks. I squat as deep as possible so it probably shouldn't happen to me

>>36955892
Tight core and tight ass.

>>36948348
This is some Mario party tier shit

>>36955945
This post was beautifully written. I don't know if you're a lit major or not but I greatly enjoyed reading this post.
>>36955966
>Knee valgus also isn't dangerous
You really shouldn't be giving advice

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>>36955966
Yeah but not like that. Think of the paper clip. Sure you can bend it straight and back into its original shape. And this will go on and one. But eventually...

Snap.

>>36948849

Guy on the left, ouch my back.

>>36953989
Was literally hearing that song in my head while watching the video.

It's amazing how you and I thought of the same exact song. I just didn't know what it was called.

>>36955780
I'll tell you how. They are upper middle class white people. Let's get a bit of a profile:
>went to a more than decent university
>majored in something broad like finance or business
>easy to pass, easy to get jobs afterwards
>coasted through on Bs and Cs
>never learned any real critical thinking
>never learned any creative or innovation skills
>got a generic job in some kind of marketing or business
>made good money from it, need something to do with it
>turn to crossfit when they want to seem better than their yoga and spin friends

The mistake you make here is thinking that having money means that you are smart. The only time it's really the case is with doctors or engineers.

>>36948866
my favorite part is that the guy in the background keeps curling slowly while he watches in curiosity

>>36956001
kek, I'm a biology major, but I am glad you enjoyed.

>>36956065
Sad story bro

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>>36948348
>>36948839
>>36948866
Don't! Get! Eliminated!

>>36954269
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0U212OsEs6I

>>36947326
LMAO

>>36947326

They're not even using a specified technique, and none of the coaches care. Traditional hurdles jump, scissors kick, squat-style front jump, whatever you can come up with on the fly, and they crash hard. Shouldn't they be taught the single best technique and the focus on developing it?

And the hurdles are all the size size, despite the fact that some of the women are 5'2". They don't stand a chance and yet they are induced "compete" with a 100% chance of failure and risk of injury. Shouldn't they be of adjustable height to reflect the very real differences of ability of the participants?

And how many people actually clear these hurdles with relative ease? If 90% of the attempts by 90% of the participants results in failure, then how is this a sporting competition?

None of this makes sense to me. Someone please explain this shit to me!

>>36954540
>Did bodybuilding stuff, it got me nowhere
Because you don't fucking know what you're doing. That's why you're doing crossfit know.

>>36948348

Darwin wins again

>>36948849
>those pl8s
>those push ups

Holy christ.

https://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/i-said-yes-to-everything-for-a-week-876

>>36955802

She tilts and locks her pelvis. Twice.

>>36956226
>specified technique

you can't develop technique for completely random events really. I think that's the point of crossfit, random shit and see who's the best "athlete"

>And the hurdles are all the size size

it's a ladder, the hurdles go up higher each time and you end up with what you can clear, and you get points based on that like they have clean/snatch ladders

you see them fail of course because they're testing their limits

i dont defend or even like crossfit but that's how they make it work as a comp

>>36956416

In theory that was the point. In practice, 90% of the stuff is predictable to an extent.

>>36956445
so let's see you predict what they are gonna have in the next comp

these are not even main events in crossfit, just a local whatever meet from the looks of it and they can add in whatever the fuck they want

they can have you swim on land as an event, lets see you predict that shit

>>36955802
knees valgus is actually pretty normal for some people, look at akkaev

>>36956463

They can.

But they almost never do. The big event can be fairly unpredictable, but the Open and most Regionals are fairly predictable in terms of movements involved and the general layout of the events. Likewise most smaller events tend be somewhat predictable because they're either using head-office WODs (and HQ reuses stuff constantly) or working off the equipment they have (which tends to be pretty standard across boxes).

>>36956507
the guy was asking why they don't have technique for hurdles, i said it's a random event, idk what you're trying to say

if you look at current cf competitors they actually have decent technique across the board in most events now compared to these randoms you see which get posted here

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>>36954540

>>36954540
191 likes.

9,000 dislikes

>>36954540
"I destroyed private property and endangered everyone in the building lmao xxddd!"

>>36948825
>>36953989
will someone please just edit these two together already jesus

>>36954702
>the musical

>>36955802
I have no idea who she thrusts her hips forward and then back before squatting.

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gym by my college. OC bby

>>36954844
true m8, its 90% white people
awful lotta honkies do crossfit

>Go to local soccer field
>Do a combination of running/ pushups/pullups as a morning workout, i come up with it on the fly

Isn't that what crossfit is? What is the hype about

What amuses me about this sport is that although is is proclaimed to forge elite fitness etc. its founder is an unfit dude. Now, why would I follow a trend or product if not even the inventor/founder believes in it?
It's similar to cosmetic surgery. Most of these highly skilled surgeons haven't conducted such a surgery on themselves (I mean done by someone else). So they offer it, but they don't use it for themselves. Now why should I, as someone who basically has no knowledge or expertise on this field then do it?
It's just marketing (in case of crossfit) with a few sponsored athletes to push it into people's every day life to drain money from said people and to make them buy overpriced stuff (a 20kg "crossfit" hammer for abour 100 dollar).
The founder of this trend is a genius, and those who follow him and his product are just bored idiots with too much money and time.

is crossfit a legitimate form of training or is it bullshit marketing?

>>36957396

Kinda-sorta. Its one of those things that relies heavily on the quality of the coach(es) at that facility. Some are pretty damn good but there's a lot of certified dumbfucks around.

>>36957396
Think ye on the fact that professional crossfitters don't do crossfit for their strength training before the events.

>>36957482

To be fair, no-one competing at a high level trains for their competitions just by doing competition movements under competition conditions.

>>36956065
>generalizing this bad
>muh speshul snowflake stem meme

>>36957482
>>36957424
>Tfw a crossfit place near me tries to incorporate fighting and self defense skills in their shitty workout
It's like they're just trying to get their clients as maimed as possible. It's one of those bullshit classes where you disarm a still target's knife to get false confidence so you can die in a gutter somewhere after you tried an aikido move your instructor saw in a Segal movie once

>>36955614
>superior choice
>cant even webm without shitty app vlc
lmao delusional cucks, maybe you can try reddit? You'll def fit in

I generally don't like crossfit but why are you all hating on hurdles? How unathletic are you?

>>36955945
>knowledge is a humbling thing

Carl Sagan

>>36957241

WHITE PEOPLE ARE GETTING DUMBER AND GETTING THEIR BONES BROKEN EVERY SINGLE DAY LOL

>>36957602
i think probably because there are many better ways without the risk of career-ending injury to train explosiveness than jumping over hurdles.

>>36948839
you just don't understand the power of the momentum

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>>36957196
>those face to wall squat instructions though...

>>36948750
this is now a Sabaton thread
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZm4zseMok0

>>36958080
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSc8EVCpqZU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9V-tGUou-M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cDa7yZeci8

>>36956065
kek what a butthurt stem fag

>>36948348
why the fuck would anyone ever even consider this to be a good idea?

>>36947326
Its not hard at all. However trainer is imbicile retard if makes people unprepared to it try it.

>>36950272
Only in stupidity of making unrepaired and uninstructed morons doing it. I jumping (or rather correct term would be "dived", as you litterally fold on top trajectory) higher than my body height (2 m something).

Its not fucking hard, and safe. However requires precaution for training, skill (not really need much strength, rather the hardest hurdle is fear).

>>36947326
Not even once

>>36954540
Im fucking speechless. How can one person be so oblivious and delusional? You know in fight club where they talk about who they would fight if they could fight anyone? I would choose this guy and curb stomp him into oblivion.

>>36954844
>>36957241
Enjoying all the sports and related technology and sports therapies created by European people? Arrogant mudpeople.

And yeah, Crossfit is ridiculous. Its a sort of social status competition, I feel.

>>36948431
Don't forget the ref signalling 'no lift' before checking to see if you're still breathing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnjYyfkcaNI

>>36958178
>>36957500
See if you feel the same way when your entire major has been rendered obsolete by an algorithm.

>>36954540
>running around the gym for no reason whatsoever

>>36949109
>>36952575
>>36952738
>>36954883
>>36956070
>lmaooo truuuuu xD

/fit/ is literally facebook

>>36959118
Fuck you cuck manlet dyel piece of dog shit go die by nigger gang bang and dont you fucking never ever ever reply to me again you worthless shitskin

>>36955614
>>36954972
Brehs...get the chan for 4chan app you idiots

>>36959132
dumb fag lol

>>36959146
What the fuck did you juST call me yoU nigger fuck? Go shag your nanny you cuck faggot apple-sucking kike! Dont talk to me or my friends on this board ever again !!!!!!!

>>36948849
>that rounded back
>those pathetic excuses for push-ups

I'd disown my son

>>36959187
Dont ever disown me or my son ever again you filthy plebeian

>>36955126
Anon, nobody hates crossfire.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Dkc2vYUEA9w

>>36948866
>chestday on 4 scoops CMON

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnjYyfkcaNI

>>36947326
why would you do that and why would you make people do that

>>36959261
I feel like Crossfit trainers are personal trainers who failed their PT course, so they just typed "I DO CROSSFIT SO TRAINING IS YES" on a paper and said they're now an expert. Having a healthy hatred for other humans also helps, to distance yourself emotionally when your charges inevitably board a train for Snap City.

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>>36954540

>2:44

>>36957396
Its not training, its exercise. There is no structured progression. Rip wrote a decent article something along the lines of "Crossfit, the good, the bad and the ugly" that is worth a read.

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>>36955997

>>36954023
How does he deadlift 6 plates but only OHP like 175

>>36956065
I know STEM fags who are this nigger tier when it comes to cross fit too

>>36947326

why do the women have yellow balls on the "spikes" and the men do not, just added challenge?

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>mfw I used to go on crossfit forums just to read the injury section.

>>36956748

you know full well that he sees this as an achievement as well, probably thinks everyone is just jealous.

>>36957396
The routines, no. You don't get better at exercises that you can't do by continuing to fail at them.
To my understanding, good trainers are what defines it, but because the only obligation for certification is a weekend course, there's no quality control.
Consider the fact that they involve olympic lifts, strongman lifts, advanced calisthenic lifts, and more in crossfit.
That alone should make you want certified strict trainers with experience actually doing these lifts at a high level. Most people will not have this experience. Most people don't even have experience with a single one of these disciplines, much less three.
The likelihood of a crossfit gym having someone qualified to actually teach you the mechanics that constitute the lifts they have you do isn't very good.
By concept, it could be a way to train. In practice, you pay exorbitant amounts for unqualified staff costs. It's a first-class ticket to snap city.

>>36948866
that walkoff
i am in orbit

>>36957492
No they normally do, racers in almost all sports race at top speed at parts of training and do training races. Power lifters do the big three as a major part of their training.