The Gains That Got Away

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True story.
TGTGA

The gains that got away still haunt me to this day
I wake up sweating, panting, fretting
Remembering waking up at a friend's cottage after an evening of energy expending.
His dad was making breakfast and asked, "what will you be having?”
“ An omlette like me, or just toasted carb/jam bread things?"
“An omlette! I exclaimed” dreaming of the gains I’d be getting
But my expectations fell as soon as I heard his lips trembling
“would you like one egg or two?”
Im sitting schocked- what do?
“Well anon?” he commenced
And I instantly regret
My mind was shouting, please three, or four, or five!
I need some real gains to keep me feeling alive!

But instead I shyly slumped
Slipping softly back to my bunk
After muttering two please in a delayed fashion
Wondering what the fuck is this army ration
I could barely move that afternoon,
The man guarded those eggs like a coon
I could only lounge in the sun’s rays

The gains that got away still haunt me to this day